Someone Someday (All in Good Time Book 2) (13 page)

Chapter 17

I went to boxing class that evening. Then, for the next two days I worked doubles. I was exhausted by the time I finished, but I always had fun with the people I worked with and I made good tips. I made time to text Morgan quite a bit in spite of my busy work schedule, and had already worked it out with him to leave three tickets for the next game.

I finally had an entire day off. With nothing to do besides get ready for the game that evening, I accomplished a few things I rarely made time for.

I called Maddie to check in on how things were going in New York. I also went to the salon and got a much-needed trim. While I was there, a girl did my makeup, and I ended up buying a few of the cosmetics she used. I'd spent the last three years trying to downplay my looks, but since I'd met Morgan, I found myself wanting to accentuate them.

I got a text from Morgan after lunch saying he didn't have to be back at the field until 5 for the game, which started at 7. He asked if he could come by and I obviously agreed. He said he'd be over at around 3, and that he'd just plan on going straight to the field from my house.

Even as I waited for him to arrive, it was hard to believe that any of this was real. Famous and athlete were two things I never dreamed I'd say about a guy I was potentially dating. Okay, so maybe I could see myself saying that about someone I was interested in, but the fact that he seem to be interested in me was amazing. As soon as I had that thought, I remembered Laney telling me that I needed to stop doubting myself, which made me puff out my chest and strut around like I deserved to be in a relationship with someone famous. I was rolling my eyes at my own silliness when I heard a car door.

There was a chance it was Zack or my neighbor Ryan, but it was just before 3, so I had a feeling it was Morgan. I rushed around the house doing silly last minute things like wiping a ring left by my glass of ice water on the kitchen counter.

My heart started racing as soon as I heard his heavy footsteps coming up the staircase. I opened the door just as he reached the top. There he was. He was wearing fitted black sweatpants and a Giant's shirt with a cap and sunglasses. He smiled and took them off just as I opened the door. He regarded me for a second and then pulled back, inspecting me more closely.

"What'd you change?" he asked staring at me.

I smiled and shook my head, making my hair sway in the wind. "I got a haircut, but I can't believe you noticed. It was only a couple of inches."

He reached out to touch my hair as we stepped into the apartment. The door gently closed on it's own behind us, but neither of us paid attention to it.

"I like it," he said. "It looks good."

"I got my makeup done by a professional too," I said, batting my eyes playfully. "Of course the leggings and t-shirt sort of cancel it out, I guess."

"I like you in leggings and a t-shirt," he said. "The only thing that would help is if it was my t-shirt."

I wanted to squeal and throw myself into his arms. I wanted to jump right into them where he had no other choice but to catch me and carry me around. I took an unsteady breath before pointing at the logo on the t-shirt he was wearing.

"I need one of these," I said. "I'm stuck wearing black to tonight's game because I don't have a Giant's shirt yet."

He pulled a money clip out of his pocket and took a hundred dollar bill from the outside of a stack of cash. He tried to hand it to me. "Come early and get yourself something from one of the fan stores."

I was already shaking my head the second he took it out of his pocket. He held it out for me to take, and I pushed it back toward him. "I didn't mean for you to give me money. I was just saying I hadn't taken the time to buy myself something."

He shook the money at me, but I didn't grab it. "Come on, let me buy it for you," he said. "You're saving up for your coffee shop."

It hit me like a ton of bricks that I was still keeping so much from him.
Where was I even supposed to begin?
I took a long breath and looked up at him with an expression that was growing ever serious. He cocked his head and stared down at me curiously. I nudged his hand back toward him again. "Put this back in your pocket and come sit on the couch with me. We need to talk."

I knew the phrase 'we need to talk' would likely scare him, and it did. He regarded me with a wary expression as he put the money back into his pocket and kicked off his shoes. "What's up?" he asked, the second we sat down.

I sighed again, trying to work up the courage to tell him the truth. "It's really not that big of a deal, I just feel bad because I've sort of been lying to you…"

His brows furrowed and I stammered to explain. "Uh, It's not that I've lied, per say, what I mean is that I haven't been totally forthcoming about some things."

He nodded and motioned with his hand for me to go ahead and spit it out. "When you asked me about paying for April's gym membership I sort of lead you to believe that Zack and Laney had done it."

He nodded.

"I only did that because I didn't want you to think that I was generous enough to pay her tuition on my coffee shop salary."

"So you're trying to tell me you make more than a coffee shop salary?" he asked.

"Sort of."

He let out a little huff. "What then?"

"I won the lottery."

He smiled, and my heart felt about a thousand times lighter. "Are you serious?"

I smiled back. "Yes. I didn't believe it myself, but the money is real and it's in my bank."

Still a bit confused, he shook his head. "Are we talking millions?"

"About six and a half."

His brows knitted together questioningly. "When was this?"

"A few months ago. I'm pretty private about it. No one at the gym knows, so I didn't even think to tell you, and now that we're… friends or whatever, it just seemed weird not mentioning it."

He ran his fingers over his eyebrows. Neither of us talked for a second. I had no idea what he was thinking or what he would say.

"Are you upset that I didn't tell you sooner?" I asked.

It took him a second, but he shook his head. "It makes sense why that guy at the coffee shop said you were loaded," he said, putting the pieces together. "I guess you're not private with it at work."

"Oh, everyone at J.D.'s knows," I said. "That was unavoidable. I won the jackpot with seven other people, and all of us worked at J.D.'s. I was the only one from the group who kept working. Everyone there knows about it, though."

He just stared at me curiously as if he was taking everything in. "Why did you keep working there?"

I shrugged. "I like it. I like the customers. I like the smell of coffee. I like everything about it. That's why I want to open my own place."

He let out a little laugh. "That explains the Range Rover."

I closed my eyes and shook my head. "That was a hard purchase," I said. "Besides a little money I sent to my mom, I hadn't spent any of my lottery winnings at all. I knew I wanted a new vehicle, but it took me forever to decide on something. I almost gave up on trying to figure it out and kept the hatchback, but I found myself needing a confidence boost one day and I ended up in the dealership."

"What made you need the confidence boost?" he asked.

I honestly hadn't expected him to ask that, and I almost lied and said, "Bad hair day," but I couldn't lie again. "It might have had a little to do with the pictures I saw of you with your fiancé."

He opened his mouth to explain something, but I stopped him.

"We'd barely even met and I had no right to care whether you were engaged or not, but either way, it had me feeling reckless for a few seconds there."

"You thought I was still engaged after that first night we met?" he asked, with a sideways smile.

I shrugged, feeling silly and defensive. "It wasn't really any of my business whether you were or not."

He reached out and touched my cheek with his finger. I thought he was going to take it away, but he left it there until I looked into his eyes.

"Yes it was your business," he said. "I liked you that night and I made it obvious. What sort of guy would I be if I went around acting like I was interested in a girl when I was engaged to someone else?"

I smiled shyly and glanced down. "I wasn't fishing for you to say you liked me or were interested."

He put a few fingers under my chin and gently nudged it upward until I made eye contact with him again. "But I
was
interested."

I gave him another shy smile and accidently bit my bottom lip. It was an honest to goodness accident as a result of my nerves. I hadn't meant to tempt him.

"Lexiii," he whispered in a warning tone.

"What?" I asked innocently.

"If you bite your lip like that I have no other choice but to kiss you."

"Really?"

"Really," he said. He stared at my mouth and I gave him a little smile. My stomach was in knots and my heart was about to beat right out of my chest. Those seconds seemed like a lifetime. I knew he wanted to kiss me, and I desperately wanted to kiss him back, but I struggled with all the things that had still been left unsaid. The desire was too much for me to handle. I stared at his curved lips for too long. Before I knew it, I bit my lip again. I'd already been warned, so I knew what would happen. In one swift motion, he turned his cap around and leaned toward me. I tilted up to meet him, but he stopped when our lips were millimeters apart.

"Are you sure?" he whispered, his lips so close to mine I could feel gentle puffs of air when he spoke.

I barely had the chance to nod before his lips were on mine. He left them there for a second without moving, and then he took a deep breath through his nose as if relieved. I closed my eyes just as his hands came up and cupped my face. I felt crazy with desire. It was a kind of desire that I thought was lost to me forever. Morgan put three, then four gentle kisses on my mouth before pulling back far enough to stare down at me.

"You made me do that," he said smiling.

I giggled. He looked so cute with his hat on backwards like that, and I couldn’t resist. I popped up and put one more kiss right on his lips.

We both smiled at each other, but then seconds later, my expression turned serious.

"What's wrong?" he asked pulling back to focus on me.

"There's more."

"More what?"

"More to say. That was amazing, Morgan, but I'm pretty sure it's the last time that will happen." He sat back on the couch and let out a defeated sigh as he rubbed his hand over his face. "Lexi, please not again with the whole, 'let's be friends' thing," he said. "Why does it have to be so hard? You like me and I like you. Can't we just give it a shot?"

I sat back on the couch and let out that same defeated sigh as I stared up at the ceiling. "I told you I'm not just being elusive for the sake of being elusive, Morgan. I don't take pleasure in playing hard to get." I continued looking at the ceiling as if the right words to say might appear up there in plain text if I stared long enough. I took another deep breath. "Remember how I told you I had issues with guys?"

"Yes, but I'm not trying to hurt you, Lexi."

"I'm not saying you would. But the hurt's already been done."

He let out a sigh of frustration. "I don't understand."

I sat up and stared him in the eyes, determined to face my demons or skeletons or whatever they were head on. "I was raped, Morgan."

He opened his mouth to say something, but I put out a hand to stop him.

"Let me finish. I know I'm not the only person in the world this has ever happened to, and I'm not asking for your pity about it. But I'm also not asking you to smile and say it's no big deal, because I know it is. You're good, Morgan. You're a good man with a good future and a good family. You don't need this mess to deal with."

Again, he opened his mouth and I stopped him. Tears filled my eyes as I thought about what I had to say next, but I knew I had to say it. I had to own up to who I was.

"It's not like it happened with a boyfriend or anything. It was at a truck stop with a total stranger. He drug me into a parking lot and raped me in the front seat of his truck, and in case you're wondering, no he did not use a condom." A tear rolled out onto my cheek, but I brushed it away, begging myself to be brave. "I haven't been the same since it happened. I worry about whether or not I have some sort of STD, and that's the last thing I want to give to you or anyone else who comes into my life… not that it matters anyway, because I'm not even interested in guys since that happened, at least not until…" I trailed off, knowing it wasn't fair to let him know he was the first guy I'd been attracted to. I blinked away burning tears. "Never mind. What I'm trying to say is that my baggage is way heavier than yours, Morgan. I don't just have some gorgeous ex floating around out there. I have issues. Serious issues."

Chapter 18

Morgan stared at me with an unreadable expression the entire time I spoke. He tried to interject a few times, but I wouldn't let him. I could see the muscles in his jaw and temple flex, but he held his tongue while I unloaded. He took off his hat, tossed it onto the coffee table and ran his hands through his hair, rubbing his head as if he could erase everything he'd just heard.

"How long ago did this happen?" was the first thing he asked.

"It was over three years ago. I wasn't quite eighteen."

His hands went into fists. I knew he was upset at the thought of someone hurting me.

"And you haven't been with anybody since then?" he asked.

I wasn't expecting that to be the first thing he asked. I squinted at him. "No. Of course not. I don't even
desire
to be with anyone. Not after seeing what men are capable of."

He closed his eyes tightly and rubbed his eyebrows again, sighing.

"Listen, Morgan. I don't want you to feel sorry for me. I knew what I was getting into when I brought this up. I know it changes things between us."

Tears stung my eyes again, and I begged myself to hold them back. I blinked hard when he wasn't looking.

"I don't think it has to change things, Lexi. It's not your fault that it happened."

I let out a little humorless laugh. "It's not my fault that it happened, but it
did
happen. It happened, and it's part of who I am."

"No it's not. Why'd you even have to tell me?"

The question stung. It confirmed that he regretted hearing it, which meant he felt differently about me. I knew it.

"Listen Morgan, I'm gonna say a few things right now. I want you to hear me out, and when I'm done I want you to stand up and walk out."

"I don't want to leave," he said. "It doesn't matter to me."

"Please just hear me out and do what I'm asking you to do."

I saw a slight shake of his head like he didn't quite agree with what I was saying, but he didn't argue.

"It was an unfortunate event that happened a long time ago. It's in my past, and I don't want to let it define who I am—"

"Then why are you making such a big deal about—"

"Just hear me out. I don't want you to say anything right now. I don't want you to tell me it's not that big of a deal to you or anything like that. I want you to take some time. Think about it. Think about whether or not it's gonna affect the way you feel about me—now or in the future. I need you to take some time and put some serious thought into it, Morgan, because it'll be much worse if you say it's fine right now just to make me feel better and then decide later that it bothers you. I don't want you to say anything. Don't try to make me feel better or tell me it's not an issue. Just take a few days to let it sink in. In the meantime, I'll go to a doctor and get tested—for my own peace of mind."

"If you had anything you'd know by now, Lexi. You said it's been three years."

"It's always gonna be in the back of my mind if I don't get checked out," I said.

I managed a little smile, trying my best to be casual and let him off the hook. "Morgan I won't blame you if you take a few days to think about it and decide you'd rather remain friends. I'd love to be your friend and I'd totally respect that decision. It's a lot to put on you. It's a lot to think about. Please, do me a favor and think about it. Let's give each other some space so you can do that."

"I don't want space, Lexi. I don't want to be friends with you. I can tell you right now that this doesn't change how I feel about you. All it makes me want to do is track someone down and kill him with my bare hands."

Silent tears rolled down my cheeks as he spoke, and I did my best to swipe them away so I wouldn’t appear so emotional. "Please don't say that, Morgan. You need to take some time to let it sink in. I would never forgive myself if I didn't let you do that."

"So what now?" he said. "You're forcing me to stay away from you?"

"Just until I get tested. Give me a few days to get some blood work done. I won't feel right about myself until I get some blood work done and find out that I'm clean." I shook my head while staring at him. "Even then, I don't know if I'm gonna feel like I'm good enough for you."

He sent me a frustrated scowl. "That's ridiculous, Lexi. That doesn't even make sense."

"Listen to me carefully when I say I will not blame you if you change your mind after you have some time to think about it."

He shook his head imperceptibly. "You already said that like ten times."

"Because I mean it."

He rubbed his face again before leaning forward to put an elbow on his knee. "Are you not coming the game tonight?"

"I'd like to come," I said. "I already promised Zack and Laney we would go. But I don't need to sit by your parents and we definitely don't need to go downstairs afterward."

"You don't have a choice about sitting by my parents. My tickets are all in one section; that's just how it works."

I thought about that for a second. "We'll probably sit by your parents and I'll act like nothing happened. I'll tell them we need to get home after the game and don't have time to wait for you."

"I want you to come downstairs. I want to meet Laney and the baby. I don't understand why you're making me stay away from you."

"Because that's the way it's got to be Morgan. It's a lot to put on you. It's not fair to ask you to smile and act like nothing happened."

"It doesn't change the way I feel about you Lexi."

"Maybe not now, but I need you to think about it. I'll never forgive myself if I don't give you time and space to think about it."

He shook his head and let out another long sigh. "I have five more games after tonight. I want you come to as many of them as you can. I won't talk to you until you're ready to hear from me, but it would make me feel better if I knew you were there."

Hot tears rose to my eyes yet again.
What had I done to deserve someone so sweet, so forgiving?
The answer was nothing. I had done nothing to deserve his love and yet he seemed to still want to give it to me. He saw the tears well in my eyes and put his hand on mine, which was resting on my thigh.

"I want you there," he said.

"It makes me happy that you do," I said. "I should be able to make it to most of them." I looked at him with a bittersweet smile.

"I do," he assured me. "And if you change your mind about coming down to the clubhouse just let my mom know and she'll walk you down."

"I won't spring that on you," I said. "If I decide to do that, I'll text you earlier in the day and let you know."

He stared down for a minute. I had absolutely no idea what he would say by the time he spoke again. "I'd like to meet Laney and the baby before you make me go," he said.

"Like right now?"

"Unless you changed your mind about bringing them to the clubhouse tonight."

I gave him a half-smile. "Come on, let's walk over there."

He followed me out the door, down the stairway, and into Laney's house through the back door. I didn't even knock when I went in.

"Psssst!" I made a noise that was loud enough to alarm them I was there but not loud enough to wake anyone up.

"Lexi?" I heard from the living room. I could tell by her tone that she was staring at the baby because she said my name like her face was making an exaggerated smile.

"I've got Morgan with me," I said, warning her before we stepped into the living room.

"Morgan's here!" she told Henry.

By the time we got in there, she was standing with her arms out in the hugging position. She came to me first and then reached over to hug Morgan. She looked back at me with a concerned expression. "You okay?" she asked, apparently noticing my red eyes.

"Yeah," I said, smiling and nodding.

She must have been content with my answer because she focused her attention on Morgan. "My husband was thrilled to meet you the other night," she said, smiling up at him. "He said you're quite the ball player."

Morgan gave her a humble nod. "It was nice meeting Zack too," he said. "My dad said he's quite the entrepreneur."

Laney smiled proudly. "He's pretty good," she said. She glanced at his shirt. "We're excited about going to the game tonight."

"Good," Morgan said. "I'm glad to have you there. You need to make sure your sister gets a shirt, though."

"You're right!" Laney said. "I might need one of those myself."

Just then, Henry let out a precious little baby yell to let us know he needed some attention. "How did we forget the star of the show?" I asked crossing over to him. I stared at him with a huge smile as I picked him up. "Where's Nanny's precious little boy?" I asked. I groaned when I lifted him. "Ugh, my goodness, Nugget! What's mama feeding you?"

"He's getting big, huh?" Laney said. "I almost threw my back out this morning."

Of course we were both joking since he was just a tiny baby still. I looked at Morgan, wondering what he'd think about my nephew.

"I work out," he said. He lifted an arm for a quick flex. "I can take him off your hands if he's too much for you to handle."

Laney and I both laughed. "You wanna hold him?" I asked.

Morgan's face broke into a huge grin. "Sure," he said.

We stayed over there for the next thirty minutes or so, holding Henry and talking to Laney. I could tell Laney loved him, and Henry seemed to give his approval as well. It didn't make matters easier that Morgan was so perfect. All I could do was hope that my test came out clean, and that he didn't wise up and change his mind.

"I better be getting to the field," he finally said, glancing at the clock. He gave Henry over to Laney and touched his little cheek with a fingertip. "I'll try to hit you a home run if you yell really loud tonight," he said.

Henry let out a perfectly timed yell and we all laughed.

"Just like that," Morgan said.

Laney looked at Morgan adoringly. "Thank you so much for stopping by," she said with great sincerity. "It was really nice meeting you."

I thought that was all she was going to say, but then she added, "I love how good you are with Henry."

He smiled and regarded her sincerely. "It was really nice meeting you both," he said. "I love babies." He flinched like he might start to walk off, but then he faced her again. "I love your sister too," he smiled and shrugged casually. "I just wanted you to know that."

To my own horror, Laney squealed with delight and ran over to give him an extra hug. The whirlwind of emotion going on inside me was so great I felt like I might explode. I walked Morgan to the driveway, still feeling shocked from what he said.

"I'm sorry for what I said back there. Sorry if it made you feel uncomfortable."

I stood next to him, looking up into the depths of his dark eyes. "It didn't," I said. "It was the perfect thing to say. I'm glad you love me, and you should know I feel the same about you—even if it ends up being as friends."

He shook his head at me and let out a sigh. "I'll give you a few days to stop being so stubborn," he said. "But you better promise to drop it after that."

I smiled. "If you promise to not feel bad for changing your mind once all this sinks in."

He rolled his eyes at me and opened the door of his truck. He settled in his truck and rolled down his window to say goodbye. "Have fun tonight," I said, trying to avoid saying something like good luck or play good.

He smiled and waved. "Bye Lexi," he said. He put the truck in reverse and backed out.

I waved one last time before heading up to my apartment. There was a text from Laney on my phone when I walked inside.

Laney: "OMGoodness! Did you hear him? He LOVES you! I love him so much Lexi. He's perfect for you. God is a total rock star!"

I laughed and tossed my phone onto the counter. I had such mixed emotions. I was terrified about getting tested and that Morgan would change his mind, and at the same time, I had an itty-bitty piece of wonderful hope thinking everything might just work out.

We went to the game that night. Laney and I both bought jerseys at the stadium. We strategically wore long sleeve black shirts so we could put the jersey on over it. Of course we chose the ones with 'Turner' written across the back. Zack bought them for us along with another sweatshirt for himself and a onesie for Henry.

Laney and Henry both loved Teresa and Jim. We all got along famously like a big Turner family cheering section should. Laney knew more about baseball than I thought she did. She said it was from all those years of working at a hardware store. We had a lot of fun at the game, but we didn't go downstairs afterward. It was incredibly difficult, especially since Morgan hit a homerun in the seventh inning that I knew was just for Henry. Morgan must have warned his mom and dad that we wouldn't be going down, though, because they didn't seem surprised when we told them we were heading home straight after the game. I told them we'd try to make it to as many of the five remaining games as we could, and they seemed happy to hear that.