Something Blue (4 page)

Chapter Five

SISTER

At weddings, the sister is sometimes the maid of honor.

At that wedding, I was the maid of honor. I wore a yellow dress and I was treated with respect.

Because I was important to him.

No one could be as important as me.

Now he’s gone. His blood was spilled, at this very place. He was shot like he was a dog.

No respect.

No reverence.

But I will claim avenge Jesus. I am Sister, now in charge. If I want respect, I have to do this. I can’t have help. It has to be by myself.

I walk around, and I knock on a few doors, trying to decide who needs to meet my knife. Who needs to kiss my gun.

I knock on one door, and I see the bride. If I kill the bride, it will be…not enough, but something.

I’m going to get her.

Then I hear a voice I know.

*

MERRI

We’re sitting by the pond, and Cross is holding me. I’m holding him. It’s in the security of this embrace that I feel comfortable enough to finally let the words out.

“Cross—I have to tell you something.”

“What?” he murmurs.

“I- I think I need to take a break. To get some space. It’s not you, I’m just so confused right now. And no, I’m not confused about
you
. But I hate myself and what I’ve been through. You deserve better. Someone whose life isn’t so…scarred.”

“Merri.” He places my hands on the scar on his shoulder.

Tears fill my eyes. “I know. You’ve been through hell, and that’s another thing. I’ve still got a hit on my head, probably.”

“I don’t care about that, Merri.” He looks—and sounds—desperate.

I kiss his cheek. “Cross. I love you. I’m so thankful for you. I still want you. I just need to…be alone and think for a while.”

He’s shaking his head, already getting up to pace. “We can talk to Dr. Libby more. Anything you need. Do you want to move out and not live with me?”

I get up, too. I fold my arms over my chest and say what I know will be hard for him to hear. “I’m going back to Georgia. I just need to come full circle. Think about things. Give my final interview to the FBI alone—just me. I’ve gotta find some way to…I don’t know. Make sense of what happened. Every time you hold me, every time you’re here for me and take the pain away…I feel more in love with you. But more lost, too. Like I’ve never really found myself.”

He says nothing, but folds his arms around himself.

Oh, Cross.

“I’m so sorry.”

His face is tight. His voice is taut. “Don’t be sorry Merri. Do what you need to do. I’ll wait.”

And maybe he will wait. But there’s pain blazing in his eyes, and I hate that.

I turn around and run into the maze, and I hear Cross behind me.

I whirl around, hungry to touch him, despite the fact that I’m leaving after the wedding. But before I can get a glimpse of him, someone slaps my face.

*

CROSS

It’s wrong. It’s very wrong—okay? But I have a tracker on her phone. It’s not some FBI shit. Just an app I downloaded. She could track me, too, if she wanted.

But she doesn’t.

The pain in my chest is so intense, I have to take deep breaths to keep from making noise.

I see the light in Lizzy and Hunter’s place. I see cars coming to the main house, friends and family getting in late.

I track her as she leaves the ranch. She must have been planning this, because she leaves via the back entrance. The staff entrance. I go inside the house and pour myself a drink. I down it, and think, stupidly, I’m the only one alone now. Me and Liz and Suri—I’m the only one who’s going to be alone.

If she wanted me more, she would stay. Merri would stay if she wanted me enough. I sit on the couch with my head in my hands as pain rolls over me. I can’t stand the feeling of her walking away, and I can’t go after her.

Chapter Six

MERRI

“He loved you. You betrayed him. You embarrassed us. He died for you, and now I’ll kill you! This is for Jesus!”

I open my mouth, and she spits in my face.

“Sister! I am sister now! You call me Sister! Jesus is gone, and I’m in charge!”

Jesus’ crazy sister points a gun at me and waves it.

“You do what I tell you. Come on! Faster!”

I march toward the parking lot, clutching my stomach and praying someone sees us.

*

ELIZABETH

“I wonder where Merri is,” I say to Suri.

The two of us are in my cottage, wearing two of Hunter’s button-up dress shirts and working on our hair and make-up while Marchant, pimp and unofficial wedding coordinator, goes to get the Love Inc. girls and bring them to us for some pre-wedding squee time.

A few minutes later, there’s a knock on the front door of the cottage, and Suri races into the den to let him in. I hear them talking softly while I work on my lips. I’m a little surprised to find, when she returns, she’s brought him with her.

Marchant nods at me, looking ready for the party in a tailor-made tux. “Looking good, Liz.”

“You, too.” I smile at him, then shift my attention back to the mirror. I really want to get my makeup done before the other girls get here. “How is Hunter?” I ask.

“He’s good I think.”

Marchant walks up behind me and puts an arm around Suri. “Liz, last night we had something weird happen on the cameras. Merri told Cross she was leaving—needed time to think about what she wants—and then she got into a Jeep with a dark-haired girl. I’m sorry to bring this up on your wedding day—”

“God no.” I’m just now finding my voice. “Where’s Cross?”

“He’s at his place. He’s doing okay.”

“There’s no way he is. God, how terrible for him.” I stand up, planning to go check on him, and Marchant presses gently on my shoulder.

“This is your wedding day,” Suri agrees. “Sit down, Liz. That’s the one constant here: we all want you to focus on your big day.”

“I just needed to ask if you saw anything out of—”

“Yes.” I clamp my hand over my mouth. My eyes, in the mirror, are wide. “Marchant, do you have housekeeping staff that goes around at night?”

*

MARCHANT

“Calm down, dude. Just repeat yourself,” I tell Cross.

He’s in his kitchen, pacing, and he’s a mess.

“She didn’t take any of her stuff with her, and her cell phone is here, at a gas station.” He points to the screen of his own phone. “Why would she leave with someone no one knows? Who’s the girl on the cameras? Just walking around the grounds? That’s fucking sketchy. Something happened.”

“Maybe not. It could have just been a friend.”

Cross shakes his head. “I don’t think she planned to tell me. It was just the right moment.” He slides his phone into his pocket. “I don’t think any of it was planned. I’m going to check on her. I know you’re busy; nobody’s got to come with me.”

I hold a hand up. “Do you know who it could have been? Waiting around to help Merri?”

“Why would she need help?” Cross growls. “I wasn’t treating her bad.” His face bleaches. “You said the girl on the camera had dark hair. Fuck. Fuck. Was it long?”

I nod.

“The one who broke into your house. Long hair?”

My stomach tightens. “Yes. Why?”

“I wonder if it could have been Jesus’s sister,” Cross says slowly.

*

MERRI

I’m shivering, naked in the back of this little abandoned house beside a gas station. Sister, as she’s started calling herself, has already told me her master plan—take me to Mexico and cut me into pieces. We’re waiting for her crew to get here.

My hands are tied behind my back. When Sister gets mad, or bored, she slaps me. Hard.

When she’s not slapping me, she’s talking about Jesus.

“He was the only one who loved me. He took care of me. Now he’s gone,” she’ll say, repeating the same things over and over.

“Were you the one who hurt Suri?” I ask her. It’s just a guess, but I can tell as I say it that it’s true. Her eyes widen a little, and she nods.

“I was there for Marchant Radcliffe, then and now. But you were easier to take. And I can always have that brothel burned all the way to the ground next time.”

My stomach clenches as I wonder when her crew will get here. Where they’ll take me. But I don’t start to cry until I think of Cross.

My sweet Cross.

I miss him so much.

Sister slaps me again.

“Shut up, bitch. You deserve no tears.”

I swallow, and my throat aches.
Cross. Come get me, Cross! I need you. Cross!

But why would he? This time, I’m on my own. Maybe it’s the universe’s way of paying me back for being a coward. For being afraid to let things with Cross run their natural course.

Sister is pacing the house, ranting and still doling out slaps, when I hear the wheels on the gravel drive outside.

I forget how to breathe.

“My crew,” she says in Spanish. She races to the door, and I hear the sound of someone kicking something as my blood runs cold.

“Cross,” I sob.

And then there he is.

He’s cutting through the ropes, lifting me up into his arms. Behind him, Marchant has Sister penned to the floor. A moment later, two of the ranch’s security guards take over. They haul her outside, and Cross wraps himself around me.

I hear sirens.

“What’s going on?” I mange.

“Jail for her,” he tells me.

A long time passes as I hold him. I’m keeping my body strained, myself rigid and tough. And then I let my head sag on his shoulder.

“I made a big mistake. I love you,” I whisper.

“I know.”

“Will you take me back?”

“Merri.” His lips press against mine. “I’ll always take you back.”

Chapter Seven

ELIZABETH

I’m standing under the trees, beside the pond, looking out at my closest friends and family, all dressed up and sitting in white fold-out chairs.

The group is divided into two, each chunk on opposite sides of our grassy aisle. At the front of the crowd is the pastor, behind a podium.

Everything is beautiful. Simple. Lots of ferns and white ribbon.

But really, my eyes are searching for Hunter.

I finally see him walk up behind the pastor, and despite the absence of Cross and Marchant, who should both be with him, I feel myself relax a little.

Suri and Loveless, who dressed me, are right beside me if I need them. I wonder where Cross and Marchant are as the music starts, and some of Hunter’s poker buddies start walking our relatives down the aisle.

I watch my mother smiling on the arm of a tall, red-haired guy I recognize from the some of the tournaments. Things haven’t been perfect with her these last few months, but she’s still trying, and I can respect that and even enjoy her company in small doses.

I watch my mom be seated, and notice her looking over my shoulder. I turn and find my dad walking up, wearing a black suit and smiling.

“You look gorgeous,” he tells me as he kisses my cheek. “Are you ready?” he asks.

I nod.

And there they come. Behind Hunter and the pastor, I see Marchant, Merri, and Cross, dirty and, in Marchant’s case, bloody.

For a moment I’m worried. Scared. And yeah, a little disappointed at the timing. But then the music starts, they file beside Hunter, while Merri hurries back to me, and our wedding is starting. There’s no time to be anything but…thrilled.

Marchant flashes me a small thumbs up, and I know we’re safe.

When Merri reaches me, she throws her arms around me and whispers, “Sorry. I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay.” There’s a blood-smear on her cheek. I wipe it with my thumb. “You okay?”

She nods.

She and Suri and I embrace, and their whispers to me are drowned out by the music, which the man at the baby grand piano just behind us is starting to really pound out.

I’m nervous as I look down at my dress, then at the aisle. I’m nervous, but Hunter catches my eye and smiles.

He smiles while my girls file down the aisle before me. While the piano pounds its notes and sets the tone—for something exciting. Something life-changing.

He smiles while my Dad slides his arm through mine and whispers, “You look beautiful. My daughter.”

And when I look up and we take our first slow step, I notice that my Mom is grinning. Suri, Loveless, Juniper, Marchant, Merri…

They’re all smiling as I start to walk. And then the crowd stands up.

My hair blows in a light breeze, and my hand curls around Dad’s arm, because I’m nervous that my shoes will get stuck in the grass, but the only thing on my mind is Hunter.

His gaze holds mine, guiding me down the aisle like a beacon of light.

On his right side, Marchant smiles. I see he and Suri catch each other’s eye, and I could swear he mouths, “you next.”

Cross and Merri, over to my side, and still standing, are holding hands. They both look relaxed and happy.

And by the time I stop at my designated spot beside Hunter, he’s beaming. I’ve never seen him smile this big. A light breeze blows, tossing my hair behind me, ruffling Hunter’s golden locks.

The pastor starts to talk, and Hunter and I clutch each other’s hands. I look into his eyes, and he grins. His thumb strokes my hand, and I hear his low voice say, “We got this, Lib.”

I nod, and just before we start to say our vows, when everyone is silent but the pastor, I have the most amazing feeling of peace. And love. Like everyone here is a friend, and all is right in the world.

And for a moment, it is.

It’s a snapshot I will frame later. A memory I’ll pull out in seven and a half more months, when I’m screaming in agony, trying to birth my daughter, and Hunter leans over my bed and says, “Libby, try to think of something good.”

It’s a feeling that will cloak me when I’m tired and covered in toddler grime, and Hunter is in Vegas, filming a tournament, and Olivia has already been in time out six times this morning. Which is tiring me out, because I’m newly pregnant with baby Oliver.

This feeling of love, it will stay with me.

And as time moves forward, it spreads out, like a long red ribbon, through Marchant and Suri’s family, as they welcome little Liam. And Cross and Merri’s family, as Merri gives birth to Evelyn and Angie on a stormy summer afternoon.

This feeling of love creates a perfect moment.

It’s mine.

And I’ll hold onto it.