Something for the Pain (Pain #2) (17 page)

OH MAN! OH MAN!

I don’t know what made me think that this tattoo was a good idea. I have to be stupid to think that I’d be able to handle his hands on me after last night. I can’t. I couldn’t, and I don’t know when I’ll be able to again.

Ever since I left his room at the shop today, I’ve been imagining the feel of his strong, tattooed hand holding my breast. Every time I looked down and saw his hand there, flashes of him between my legs invaded my mind. I couldn’t see anything else. I couldn’t seem to shake the image off. All I wanted was to
feel
what I was I was imagining. I wanted to feel him filling me.

“Babe . . . damn, you’re somewhere else tonight. Hello . . .” Lucas snaps his fingers in front of my face, saving myself from the dirty thoughts of Alex that I’ve been drowning in the whole night.

Even at a party I can’t seem to keep my mind straight. There are over thirty people here, yet the only person I want to talk to is Alex; the one person that isn’t here.

“Lucas . . .” I warn. “Don’t snap your fingers in front of my face. You know how much I hate that.” I push my way out of his arms to go make myself another drink. “I’m just tired. It’s been a long week and I’ve got a lot on my mind with the bar and stuff.”

Lucas pushes up behind me and wraps his arms around me, squeezing my breasts and jiggling them. Ugh . . . I fucking hate when he does that.

“Let me wake you up then, baby.” He rubs his lips up the side of my neck, before biting. I slightly pull away, before he can leave a mark.

“Alex . . .”

Shit . . .

My whole body becomes heated in embarrassment from calling Lucas by the wrong name. I seriously just cannot function tonight. This is so not good. I’ve never been this distracted in my entire life.

“Alex, huh? Is that who’s on your mind?”

Just as I think Lucas is about to pull away and get pissed at me for calling him by Alex’s name, he pulls me closer to him instead and slips his hand up the front of my dress, sliding his finger through my folds.

“Close your eyes, baby. I can finger fuck you as Alex if you want.” I lose my breath for a second at the mention of Alex finger fucking me. “You’re so fucking wet and warm. Fuck me . . .”

Just as he’s about to slide his finger inside me, I open my eyes and quickly push his hand away. He’s not Alex, and this shit with him pretending that he is, is beginning to fuck with me. “What the hell is it about Alex and me together that turns you on so much? Huh? Tell me.”

He grabs my arm and holds me in place as I attempt to walk past him. He’s making me so damn angry and uncomfortable right now. “You act as if I’m the only one that gets turned on by it. I think we both know that’s a lie.”

“Let go.” I yank my arm away and walk through the crowded kitchen to find a quiet place in the hallway. I really don’t want his friends to hear this. Lucas follows behind me with his arm around my waist, as if I’m going to run away from him. I should, because right now . . . I want to.

Lucas pins me against the wall and gets close to my face, with his hips pressing against me. “You don’t think that I’ve seen the way you and Alex are together? You guys sleep in the same damn bed. The two of you cuddle and shit. He even sings to you and plays the guitar to calm you down. He protects you. You protect him and look out for him. You guys are the perfect fucking couple without being an actual couple.”

He stops to brush his lips over mine. “There is so much sexual tension between you and Alex that even
I
can feel it in my balls. Watching two people that have wanted to
fuck
for as long as they have known each other finally break down and do it is by far the sexiest thing a man can witness, so yes, it turns me on. It makes me so fucking hard that it hurts, and it makes me even harder to know that I get to be the one to fuck you when he can’t anymore. Soon, I will be the only one between those sweet thighs of yours, and Alex will be left with a small taste that he can never sample again.”

Anger floods my body and all I want to do is knee Lucas in the fucking balls. I should have known there was an ulterior motive. “Lucas, you can be such a dick.” Placing my hands to his chest, I shove him backward and rush down the hall toward the back door. He can be such a little bitch sometimes when he drinks.

“Whoa! Baby!” Lucas follows at my heels, not getting the hint. “Stop, please. Come here.”

I turn around, stopping him dead in his tracks. “What? Just leave me alone, Lucas! You’ve had too much to drink and you’re acting like a straight up ass.”

He reaches out and runs his hands up my arms to soothe me. “I didn’t mean for it to come out as harshly as it did. I’m sorry. Okay? I’m jealous of what you guys have. I’m human. I’m really fucking jealous, and I thought that after you guys realized how awkward it would be together, that it would change, but it wasn’t awkward at all.”

Swallowing hard, I look up to meet his desperate eyes. I almost feel sorry for him, but not enough to lie and tell him that I want him more than I do Alex. “I don’t really know what to say right now, Lucas. I’m pretty pissed and just want to go home.”

“I’m leaving in the morning, Tripp. The bank wants to fly me out to New York to see how I do running one of the biggest branches that they have. I’ll be gone for a week. I think when I get back that we should discuss making us exclusive. It’s been long enough, and I’m ready to make you mine.”

What the fuck . . .

“In a week, Lucas? One week . . . as in seven days?” I swallow hard and fight to catch my breath. I don’t know if a week is long enough. I feel as if I’m suffocating at just the thought of being serious with Lucas. That’s definitely not a good sign. “I don’t know . . .”

“A week is plenty of time, Tripp. It’s been almost a year. I really don’t want to wait anymore. I can’t. Those other girls have nothing compared to you. You wanted us to keep it light and fun . . . so that’s what I’ve been doing. After next week I’m done with that shit.”

I reach out for Lucas’ keys as he dangles them in front of me. “Sorry for being an ass. I’ll let you drive us home.”

I squeeze Lucas’ keys in my hand as he leaves me alone to say goodbye to his friends. Normally I would say my goodbyes too, but tonight I just can’t seem to bring myself to, so instead, I jump into the driver’s seat of Lucas’ vehicle and wait for him. All I really want to do right now is go home and crawl into the warmth of my cozy bed. No more thinking . . .

WHEN WE GOT BACK TO the house Lucas tried talking me into sleeping in his bed, but that’s the last thing I can force myself to do right now. Then he tried to talk me into just a quickie, which I declined as well. Lucas just needs to sleep his stupidity off and get ready for his early morning flight.

The sounds of Alex in the pool cause me to pause in the kitchen and listen for a minute. It’s taking everything in me not to go into that room, knowing damn well that Alex is most likely swimming naked. I don’t know what it is with him and naked swimming, but it’s extremely hot. I hate that it’s such a temptation.

Wondering if he ate the dinner I left him, I open the microwave to see that the plate of Steak and fried potatoes are gone. I smile to myself, knowing that it’s one of Alex’s favorite meals and that he gets extremely happy every time that I make it for him. It gives me a sense of pride.

Making my way up the stairs, I strip down to a silky camisole and my panties, before crawling into the bed and turning off the bedside lamp.

I can’t help but to toss and turn, while listening for Alex to come up to his room. Just knowing that he’s close by will help me fall asleep. It always has.

Not even forty minutes later, once I’m close to finally drifting off to never-never land, I feel the bed beside me dip and the mouthwatering scent of Alex fills the air as he slips in next to me, then pulls me into his cold, slightly wet arms and holds me like he’s been doing since we were kids . . .

Except now . . . it feels so much different.

Seven years ago . . .

I SIT UP IN BED to the sound of someone slowly raising my bedroom window. My heart swells, knowing that it’s Alex sneaking in once again. I’m starting to look forward to this very sound and I’ve been finding myself watching and waiting for it more often these days.

My heart speeds up with anticipation as he climbs inside and shuts the window behind him, trying to be quiet enough so that he doesn’t wake Tara up.

“Alex . . .” It’s dark, so I can’t really make anything out except for the dark figure coming at me, dressed in a hoodie. The hood covers his face and his body appears to be shaking. He seems to be taking his time walking toward me, as if he doesn’t want me to see him. “What’s going on? Alex?” I start to panic as he gets closer and I can finally make out the sounds of his heavy breathing.

Placing a finger to his mouth, he shushes me and crawls into bed beside me, slipping under the blankets and getting comfortable. “Go back to sleep, Tripp. It’s late.”

“What time is it?” I ask while sitting up on my knees and reaching to pull his hood down. The sight of his bloodied, swollen face in the moonlight causes me to gasp and reach out to comfort him. My hands cup his face, being careful not to hurt him even more. His right eye is so fat that he can’t even open it. “Oh my God, Alex! Are you okay? Please tell me that you’re okay. Let me take care of you,” I cry out. I can’t help but to cry whenever I see him hurt like this. It kills me so damn much, knowing what his father puts him through, and what he does to him.

Alex is my best friend. He means everything to me. I feel his pain as if it were mine. “I hate him, Alex. I hate him so damn much. Why does he have to do this to you? Why? Please leave there and stay here. I can ask Tara . . .”

“I’m fine, Firecracker. I’m
going
to be fine.” He gently reaches for my hands and pulls them away from his face, placing a gentle kiss to each one. “This is becoming routine for me. It gives me a reason to sneak out and sleep in your bed. You’re my something for the pain,” he says with a painful laugh. “Now lay down so I can hold you and fall asleep. I’m tired as hell and you have to get up early, babe.”

Knowing that Alex will refuse to talk about his father and what happened tonight, I pry my eyes away from his achingly beautiful face and lay down beside him, shifting to my side. I scoot in as close to him as possible, and then squeeze his arms until my nails are digging into his skin through his hoodie. In this moment I just want to be as close to him as possible. I want him to know that someone does love him. His father may not give a shit anymore, but I sure as hell do.