Sotah (57 page)
The
sotah,
or wife suspected of infidelity, was given a trial by ordeal whose purpose was to uphold marital faithfulness and also to protect the guiltless wife from unjustified and irrational enmity and jealousy.
Introduction,
Tractate Sotah,
Mishnayot Nashim
Edited by Phillip Blackman
If any man’s wife … acts unfaithfully against him … and it be hid from the eyes of her husband … [or] if the spirit of jealousy comes upon [the husband] … then shall the man bring his wife unto the priest … And the priest shall take an earthen vessel and the dust that is on the floor of the tabernacle … and put it into water. The priest shall disarrange her hair and say to her: “If no man have lain with thee and if thou has not gone aside to uncleanness … be thou free from this water of bitterness that causeth the curse. But … if some man have lain with thee besides thy husband … the L-rd make thee a curse and an oath among thy people.” … And he shall make the woman drink the water of bitterness … And it shall come to pass that if she has acted unfaithfully her belly shall swell and her thigh shall fall away; and the woman shall be a curse among her people. And if the woman not be defiled, but be clean, then she shall be cleared …
Numbers 5, 11 – 28
The Saturday Wife
The Covenant
Chains Around the Grass
The Ghost of Hannah Mendes
The Sacrifice of Tamar
Jephte’s Daughter
A few years back, I was invited to an International Conference on Women’s Rights in Strasbourg. There I was, an Orthodox Jewish woman from Jerusalem in a large conference room surrounded by devout Muslim women from France and Afghanistan; Scandinavian Christians; and modern, secular women from all over Europe.
What in heaven’s name, I thought, do any of us have in common?
But as I sat listening to speaker after speaker, a sense of shock enveloped me. A religious Muslim woman, who had come with her three-day-old baby, spoke of the Koran’s positive attitude towards women, attacking the Muslim extremists who falsely interpret the texts to deny women their rights.
I was almost going to give the same speech, except that I was going to talk about Rabbis and the Rabbinical Courts and the Torah.
Both of us loved our G-d, our religion, our tradition, something I think we were able to convey to the secular women present, who at first couldn’t comprehend us. A member of the Spanish parliament challenged me: “In the modern world, you can live anywhere, do anything you want. You are free. Why, then, do you choose to wear the chains imposed on you by religion and the narrow-minded, backward men who are religious leaders?”
And this is what I answered: “I am part of a chain that reaches back for thousands of years. There is a great joy in knowing who you are, and where you come from; in cherishing and preserving those cultural and religious treasures that are your heritage and which make you unique. Why should I allow these men to push me out, deny me that place? No, I prefer to fight them, to make them live up to the goodness and justice of the authentic religion that belongs to me, not just to them. I prefer to have them thrown out, rather than for me to leave.”
You should have heard the applause in that room, and seen how I smiled at the Muslim woman who had spoken before me, and how she smiled back. She adjusted her head scarf. I tugged at my hat.
It was a warmer room after that. We traded statistics, and horror stories, and raised our voices in a great cry against the system that, despite all our advances, all our victories, continues to keep women powerless all over the world.
And I thought: My sisters. We are half the world. How is it, then, that we have no power?
How is it we still have political systems run almost entirely by men, who make laws discriminatory to women? Police forces who ignore the cries of frightened, abused women? Court systems that allow our sisters, mothers, and daughters to be raped and humiliated and murdered, with so little punishment? And religious leaders who misuse religious texts—whose entire premise is equality, compassion, justice, and kindness—to chain women into abusive relationships and deny her justice?
I think this is the reason: we continue to fragment our power by perpetuating the hatreds of our male-dominated culture: religious against secular, Ashkenazia against Sephardia, white against black, rich against poor … .
Hasn’t the time come for us women in Israel—and the world—to set aside our differences and embrace each other? To acknowledge the powerful bonds that connect us as those who give and sustain life, knowing joys and sorrows men can never know? If we can do that, we will finally become the force that changes the world into a more life-giving and life-sustaining place.
Naomi Ragen
1.
The
sotah
was a woman accused of adultery who had to go through a purifying ritual to prove her innocence, or ascertain her guilt. Read Numbers 5, 11-28. How do the events in
Sotah
parallel the biblical ritual? What is Dina Reich guilty of? Does she reach purification, or
teshuva?
2.
Female family relationships are very important in
Sotah.
Describe the relationship between Dina and her sisters, the girls and their mother.
3.
Joan opens Dina’s eyes to the greater world, but Dina opens Joan’s eyes and her heart to many things this modern woman is equally ignorant of. Describe their relationship and what they teach each other.
4.
In the beginning of
Sotah,
we encounter Dina Reich as a young girl. In the course of the story she matures and changes. How would you describe the kind of transformation that takes place in her?
5.
The word “sift” describes a pivotal concept in
Sotah.
Can you describe when the word is used, and what it means in terms of the story?
6.
Attempts to find Dina a husband without the use of a matchmaker result in disaster. Describe the positive role of the matchmaker in the
haredi
world.
7.
Compared to modern Western rituals of dating and marriage, the
haredi
world seems very narrow. Can you see anything positive in the
haredi
customs?
8.
Statistics show that
haredi
women have a lower life expectancy than their husbands do. What elements in the life of Dina’s mother and her sisters do you think could lead to that?
9.
Moishe writes Dina: “I guess being a Chasid is pretty good training” (for being a soldier). What does he mean? Do you agree with him?
10.
The idea of
chesed
is very important in
Sotah.
What is
chesed?
Can you describe acts of
chesed
in the book?
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The fonts used in this book are from the Garamond and Gill families
.
This is a work of fiction. All of the characters, organizations, and events portrayed in this novel are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously.
SOTAH. Copyright © 1992 by Naomi Ragen. All rights reserved. For information, address St. Martin’s Press, 175 Fifth Avenue, New York, N.Y 10010.
First published in the United States by The Toby Press LLC
eISBN 9781429919661
First eBook Edition : April 2011
Library of Congress Cataloguing-in-Publication Data
Ragen, Naomi.
Sotah / Naomi Ragen.—1st St. Martin’s Griffin ed.
p. cm.
1. Jewish way of life—Fiction. 2. Adultery—Fiction. 3. Jerusalem—Fiction. 4. New York (N.Y.)—Fiction. 5. Jewish fiction. I. Title.
PS3568.A4118S67 2009
813’.54—dc22
2009022756