Soul Chance (16 page)

Ari brought her knees up as he slammed into her, relishing the intensity of his passion. She pushed her hands beneath his shirt, digging her nails into his back. Ari gazed up at Ryder, dazed by the whirlwind of sensations flooding through her. She reached up and cupped Ryder’s face as she whispered his name.

Ari’s breath hitched in her throat as Ryder groaned and pumped her faster. She clung to him as she climaxed, awed by the pleasure enveloping her. She mewled, trembling at each pinwheel of ecstasy spinning within her. Ari slid her hands from Ryder’s back to his hips when his movements became jerky. She cried out at depth of his strokes, drowning out his gruff grunt as he came.

Ari moaned as he pulled out of her body. She briefly closed her eyes, savoring the blissful arcs still rippling through her. She quivered as Ryder yanked up his pants and shifted his body to lay beside her. Ari stared up at the stars, amazed by what they had just done. She turned her face to look at Ryder, very aware of her wet thighs and unorthodox surroundings. “We just had sex on the beach.”

Ryder chuckled. “Was it better than the drink?”

“Much better.” Ari touched her twists. “Messier too. I’ve got sand in my hair.”

Ryder got to his feet and held out his hand. “That’s what showers are for.”

“I bet I’ll set a new world record for the longest shower time.” Ari took hold of Ryder’s hand, giggling as he pulled her up from the sand.

“Hey, I would love to help you break that old world record. Just say the word.”

Ari laughed as they walked hand in hand back to the beach house.

Fifty minutes later, Ari joined Ryder on the couch in front of the pillar candles she’d lit before going to shower. She squeezed the towel around her twists a final time then unwrapped it from her hair.

“All the sand out?”

Ari patted the ends of her hair with the towel. “I think so.” She shivered when Ryder picked up a strand of hair. Her pulse reacted to the subtle scent of his cologne and aftershave.

“I love your twists but I bet you’d look great wearing your natural hair.”

“Excuse me?” Ari eyed him, wishing he didn’t look so damn good in everything he put on, his khaki shorts and a black tee, no exception. “How do you know this
isn’t
my natural hair?”

“Is it?” Ryder lifted the twist in his hand to his nose, seeming to enjoy the fragrance of her favorite shampoo.

“No, but that’s beside the point.” Ari snatched her hair from Ryder’s grasp, surprised by his comment. No other guy had ever made hair suggestions for her before.

“Are you offended?”

Ari sighed. Offended was last on her list of emotions tumbling inside her. “I’m confused.”

“About?”

“About why you aren’t going to hold me to our deal.”

Ryder glanced at candles in front of them. “Remember Cassie?”

“Yes.” Ari straightened her back at the mention of the other woman’s name.

“I know you wanted to ask me about her.” Ryder looked at Ari. “Cassie was my high-school sweetheart. I was in love with her. We’d talked about going to college together and although I hadn’t asked her yet, we both knew we were going to marry, have two-point-four kids and a dog. Out of the blue, Cassie broke things off with me.” Ryder shook his head. “Worst day of my life. She told me she was going away for college, didn’t want to have a long-distance relationship.”

“That must’ve been difficult to hear.” Ari watched Ryder push his fingers through his damp hair.

Ryder shifted his gaze to the flickering candles on the coffee table. “It was fucking brutal but I respected her decision, went off to school and tried to forget about the first woman to capture my heart.”

Ari nodded, ignoring feelings of jealousy and envy bombarding her at Ryder’s frank declaration. It wasn’t easy trying to be emphatic when her heart was constricting at the possibility of Ryder telling her where his heart still belonged.

“I’d always felt there had to be more behind what Cassie was telling me for breaking things off the way she did, but I never imagined the true reason.”

Ari waited for Ryder to finish then frowned when he remained silent. “Ryder?”

“She had a child.”

“Oh my
God.
” Ari gasped. “She had your child and didn’t tell you?”

Ryder turned his head and met her gaze. “Not mine. My father’s.”

Silenced stretched between them as Ari stared at Ryder, dumbfounded by what he’s shared. “Cassie had your
dad’s
baby?”

“Yes.” Ryder got up from the couch. “He’s been paying her to keep quiet and to help raise the child he didn’t want to accept as his own.”

Ari gasped again. “Oh, Ryder…”

“I know. Unbelievable, right?”

Ari reached out and placed her hand over Ryder’s. “You just found out about this?”

“I did. That night when you’d asked me what was wrong?
That
’
s
what was bothering me. I couldn’t wrap my head around what I’d learned, let alone share it with you. I didn’t mean to take my resentment and anger out on you.”

“Ryder—”

“Wait, let me finish.” Ryder blew out a breath. “My dad manipulated Cassie with money in order to get her to do what
he
wanted. I condemned him when my actions with you haven’t been any better. Remember when I asked you what was more important…money or the truth?”

“Yes.” Ari shivered, recalling the night. She’d never forget him asking her that question.

“Well, the truth for me is that I don’t care about the money I loaned you.”

Ari frowned. “You don’t
care?
Fifty grand is a lot of cash.”

“It is, no doubt, but what I’ve realized is that my asking you to pay it back by coming to work here was a form of manipulation. I wanted you to make some changes in your life that
I
thought would benefit you.” Ryder shook his head. “That’s not right. It’s not fair. I didn’t feel good about myself or the deal we’d made anymore.”

Ari nodded, at a loss for words at what Ryder had shared. She stood and embraced him. “Ryder, I’m so sorry.” She hugged Ryder tighter as he wrapped his strong arms around her.

“Me too.”

Ari placed her cheek on his chest, savoring the sound of his heart beating beneath her ear, the feel of his strong arms wrapped around her. “You’ve been through a terrible shock.” She pulled back to look up at him. “I can’t imagine what you’ve been going through.”

“I just don’t understand what kind of man could keep this kind of secret for so long. It’s unconscionable.” Ryder scoffed as he moved away from her. “I’ve admired my father as a business and family man for so long and it has always filled me with pride when someone would say I took after him. Now? Now I’m disgusted and depressed to discover I’m more like him than I ever thought.”

“You’re angry. I get it.” Ari placed her hand on Ryder’s arm. “I would be too but, Ryder, please don’t compare yourself to your dad when it comes to you and me and him and Cassie. They are two different situations.”

Ryder held her gaze. “Maybe. I’m not convinced. I still want you to consider your debt to me paid. I would ask if you could on stay until I can find suitable entertainment for The Cove, which I plan to do as soon as possible.”

“Not a problem.” Ari let go of Ryder’s arm. She didn’t want to leave. The epiphany brought tears to her eyes. She had no intentions of begging Ryder to stay if he wanted her gone.

“Good. Thank you. Ari, I want you to go back to the life you were making for yourself in Vegas.”

“Okay.” Ari gave him a bright smile, hoping it masked the heartbreak swallowing her whole. “Th-thank you for your generosity. I don’t know what to say.”

“You don’t have to say anything. I’ll be in town for the next three weeks. I’m certain I can find someone to fill your shoes by then.”

“Perfect.” It took effort for Ari to meet Ryder’s gaze. She was distraught by how cavalier he was about replacing her.

“All right.” Ryder gathered up the clothes he’d worn before their illicit romp on the beach. “I’ll be in touch.”

“Wait. You’re not going to stay here?”

Ryder’s gaze drifted over her. “I don’t think that’s a great idea. It would be
all
too easy for me to change my mind and make you honor the terms we agreed to.”

Make me honor my terms.
Ari wanted to scream the words, anything to keep him close, in her bed. She forced a grin instead. “Understood.”

“I’m going to say goodnight.” Ryder went to the door. He turned to look at her as he opened it. “I’ve been so preoccupied with my own shit I forgot to mention I’m going to be one of the judges for that vocal competition show.”

“Congratulations. I know you’ll do a great job.”

“Thanks. Ari, I think you should audition. If you need anything…call me.”

“Goodnight.” Ari closed the door behind Ryder, watched him descend the stairs and disappear into the night. She stood at the window, uncaring of the tears slipping down her cheeks.

Ryder had released her from her loan. The relief and happiness she’d expected to feel once that had happened wasn’t there. All she felt was a great sense of loss. Ryder had told her to call if she needed anything but Ari knew she’d never do it. She needed him.

Who was she kidding? She wanted Ryder’s heart.

“Silly, silly girl.” Ari let loose a sob, disappointed in herself.

She’d known the stakes, and Ryder’s love had never been on the table.

Chapter Twelve

Ryder ended the call with his mom just as someone knocked on his dressing room door. “Come in.” He smiled at the production assistant who popped his head in.

“You’re wanted on stage in twenty minutes.”

“Thanks, William.”

William nodded. “No problem.”

Ryder assessed his perfectly moussed and styled hair. His stylist had suggested…no, harassed him about leaving the first two buttons of his dress shirt unbuttoned, and he had relented. Ryder folded the tie he’d brought to wear, astonished by the conversation he’d just had with his mother.

She was sticking by his father—despite the blow their marriage had taken—because of her love for him. Ryder was amazed by her ability to forgive such betrayal. His mom had shared with him how difficult things had been but her hopefulness for the future had left an undeniable mark on his heart. A part of him wished he’d experienced that kind of deep, abiding love.

Ryder’s thoughts drifted to Ari as he reached for his cell. He’d felt the absence of her smile every day. They hadn’t talked, besides a few texts back and forth to discuss potential replacements for her. Finding a talented, reliable, long-term replacement had proven to be more time-consuming than he’d anticipated.

Ryder unlocked his phone and checked his messages, hoping Ari had liked the female guitarist he’d sent to take the gig. He grinned when he saw a message from Ari confirming that she was satisfied with Gwen’s musical skills. His mood soured when he realized that meant Ari would probably be leaving for Vegas soon. There would be no reason for her to stay.

With a muttered curse, Ryder leaned back in his seat. If he closed his eyes, he could picture her breathless and wet beneath him in the moonlight on the beach. Erotic flashbacks of rolling with her in the sand kept Ryder up at night…literally and figuratively. For a second, when he’d asked her what she’d wanted, he’d hoped she’d tell him she wanted him, not just in that heated moment, but in her life period.

Their last conversation at the beach house replayed like a tape in his head at the most inopportune times. Like now, when he needed to focus on his job in front of the camera. Ryder grabbed a bottle of water off the vanity, unscrewed the lid and took a sip. He was glad he had admitted to trying to manipulate Ari with his offer to sing at The Cove in order to help her get her life on track. Absolving Ari of the debt and the deal they’d agreed upon felt right.

Coward.

He had wanted Ari from the moment they’d danced at the
Celeb Chef
premiere bash, had been spellbound by her the instant he’d heard her sing. That was the main reason he’d offered her the job at The Cove. He knew he’d get an opportunity to spend more time with her
away
from the craziness of Vegas. He’d expected their white-hot affair to fizzle out but he only craved Ari more—and not just in a sexual sense.

Ryder hit a button on his phone and the song he’d collaborated on with Ari began to play. Her sultry voice soothed and aroused him. Ryder gritted his teeth as his cock stiffened. It had taken all of his resolve not to show up at the ranch while he’d still been in Florida. He’d been certain he could get Ari in bed. The chemistry between them was undeniable, damn near unstoppable when he touched her, but he needed to know she was with him because of genuine feelings, not as part of some agreement.

There had been moments during their time together when Ryder would’ve trusted his gut in believing that Ari did feel something for him other than wicked lust. The surreal revelation about his dad and Cassie had him questioning everything, every emotion.

Ryder rewound his favorite part of Ari’s song, enthralled by her tone and her heart-wrenching lyrics of longing and love. She was so talented and beautiful. All she needed was that one big break and she could be the next singing sensation. He wanted to help her fulfill her dreams.

On a whim, Ryder sent a copy of the song to another music producer who he knew had the connections to get Ari’s voice out there. Pleased, he stood to go. He wondered if Ari had considered auditioning. He ignored the notion to call and encourage her to do so one more time. After a week of judging auditions, Ryder was more convinced than ever Ari could snag a spot on the show. She had the perfect look and ability to go far in the competition.

Ryder slipped his phone into his pocket as he opened the door and exited his dressing room. He would not influence Ari to make a move either professionally or personally anymore. Whether the latter included him or not, she had to make her own choices.

* * * *

“You’ve got this, sis. How do you feel?”

Empty.
Ari forced a grin as she looked at her phone, happy she’d been able to Skype her brother before auditioning. “I’m a little tense. Who would’ve guessed there were so many singers in Florida?”