Authors: Ilsa Evans
Maddie crossed her legs and lightly stroked the silky sage material of her jacket for luck. She glanced back towards the stairs and suddenly there he was, right in front of her, almost at the top. Her heart mushroomed into her throat, pulsing so loudly that it echoed up into her eardrums. She clutched at her jacket and then put a hand up to her throat, involuntarily, as if touching it would help her survive this.
âHe's here,' whispered Hannah from beside her. âBastard.'
He was wearing a gun-metal grey suit and a muted burgundy tie, together with an air of confidence that sat lightly on him like a mantle. So that he looked as if he belonged, and Maddie felt strangely proud of him for that. He was deep in conversation with the person next to him, an overweight man with dark, slicked-back hair that curled damply into the nape of his neck. Maddie wanted to look away, to appear casual, unaffected, but simply couldn't. So she sat, fingers pressing against the base of her throat until finally he reached the top of the stairs and looked her way. His eyes widened as he paused, and for a second Maddie thought he was going to say something. Then the moment was over, and he grinned, quite unexpectedly, and winked. A long, lazy, friendly wink that made sure she knew exactly what it was.
âDid you see that?' Hannah turned to her furiously as Jake continued past. â
Did
you?'
Nodding, Maddie closed her eyes but could still see the wink, embossed inside her eyelids, so she opened them again. âDon't let it get to you. That's what he wants.'
âGod.' Hannah stood up crossly, staring around the room. âWhere's Diana?'
Maddie shrugged. She just wanted to crawl away somewhere and absorb what was happening, and it worried her that she was feeling like this already. When the day had barely begun. She rubbed her arm gently, to not crinkle the silk, and stared down at the carpet, at the reliability of the stripes.
And now she was on the couch with a throw rug draped over her. It was a faux-fur one, with a smoky-grey pelt that showed glimpses of gun-metal when ruffled. She could see him in the kitchen, getting her some pain tablets, and soon he would be back. Her saviour. To run his fingers through her hair so gently, so caringly, that it would seem inconceivable, almost, that yesterday had happened at all.
Maddie sighed tiredly, and rubbed her eyes. When she finally glanced up once more it was to see Kim beaming at her.
âI thought I was going to be late!' She was breathing rapidly, out of breath.
âI
told
you that you didn't have to come,' said Maddie, knowing full well why her friend had made the effort. âAll that way!'
Kim shook her head emphatically. âYou need support for something like this. Besides, it looks better.' She turned to Hannah. âYou must be Maddie's sister. I'm Kim.'
âGlad you could make it,' Hannah nodded approvingly. âExcellent.'
âYes. And thank you,' Maddie smiled, genuinely touched by Kim's effort. They had only had one phone conversation, on the weekend, since the aborted visit last week. And Maddie hadn't put a great deal of faith in Kim's insistence that she would be here today, especially given the distance. Or perhaps she hadn't really wanted Kim to come at all, not when she knew that the support was limited to her, as a friend, but not her actions.
A late surge of people came hurrying up the stairs and among them was Diana, dressed beautifully in a snug black skirt and a silk shirt precisely the same colour as the pearls around her neck. She was carrying a thin black briefcase with an oversized gold buckle at the front.
â
There
you all are. Excellent.' Diana was already glancing around the room. âIs the other party here yet?'
Maddie stood but the dividers prevented a clear view. âThey're over there somewhere.'
âHmm.' Diana stared for a few more moments, as if expecting Jake and his lawyer to materialise, and then glanced down at her watch before pointing towards one of the courtrooms, which had become very busy. âWell, no time now, we'd better go in. Courtroom four.'
They joined the flood of people entering courtroom four, where it quickly became clear that there were no more seats left. Diana ushered them along the wall until they were in front of a polished wood divider. It was a large room, with the divider separating three rows of public seating from the bar table, with its deep, swivel chairs. Beyond this was another long table occupied by the court clerk, a very slim woman with shiny black-grey curls partially tamed by an army of pins. Then came the high panelled bench behind which was the magistrate's chair. And a large, embossed bronze disc of Australia's coat of arms. As Maddie finished her brief inspection there were a series of echoing knocks and the clerk called out, in a loud voice: âAll stand and remain standing. The Federal Magistrates Court of Australia at Dandenong is now is session.'
As the entire courtroom rustled to their feet, the black-robed magistrate came in from a door behind his chair and then stood silently for a moment, surveying his court with a rather majestic air. He bowed his head and sat down. Another noisy shuffling followed as the clerk gave permission for all to be seated and then, it seemed to Maddie, quite suddenly muted bedlam broke loose. Lawyers dashed forward to thrust sheets of paper at the clerk or announced numbers and made short speeches, waiting for these to be recorded before pushing their way back out of the room, clients in tow. The clerk remained standing to facilitate proceedings, while other lawyers scrambled their way forward to whisper to colleagues at the long table. Out of the corner of her eye, Maddie could see Jake at the back of the room, staring straight ahead.
âWait here,' hissed Diana, moving forward. Amidst the bustle, and the numbers, Maddie suddenly heard her own name. Her
real
name. With some surprise she turned to find that the large man who had accompanied Jake was now addressing the court.
â. . . for the applicant father. And we'd like the matter stood down to give us a chance to come to some resolution.'
Another lawyer pushed past Maddie and then squatted right in front of her to begin a hissed conversation with his client in the seat opposite. She could hear Diana speaking near the bar table and then, almost immediately, she was back again. She gestured for them all to follow and then moved quickly towards the door, pausing momentarily to turn and bow her head towards the magistrate. They each followed suit and then filed through into the waiting room. Maddie took a deep breath, tremendously relieved to be outside once more.
âRight-o.' Diana put her arms out and continued to usher them, as if herding sheep, away from the courtroom and towards an alcove. âSit down, let's have a chat.'
Maddie sank into a two-seater couch while Kim perched on the armrest and Hannah sat in a chair to the side. They all looked up at Diana expectantly.
âNow, we've been stood down for a while. What that means is we're supposed to come to some sort of resolution, so that then we can go back with consent orders all ready to go.'
âHow would that work?' asked Hannah hopefully.
âIt won't,' said Maddie. She wasn't sure of much today, but of that she was certain.
âWell, you never know.' Diana put her briefcase down and started flicking through papers as she spoke. âAnd we have to go through the motions anyway, otherwise the magistrate will ask why not. So what happens now is that we snare a meeting room and get things underway.'
âAll of us?' Maddie felt her stomach hollow once more. âMe?'
âActually, I'm thinking no. Given the circumstances, and that there's form fours out from each party, it's probably best that I represent you alone. See what I can do.'
âWhat's a form four?' asked Kim hesitantly.
âA notice of child abuse or family violence. In this case family violence.' Diana selected some papers and started reading through them. After a few minutes of concentration, she stared intently at Maddie. âOkay then, I have to ask, how far would you be prepared to compromise?'
Maddie looked at her suspiciously. âIn what way?'
âWell, as in do we have a middle ground? Would you be willing to
share
care? Say, the children living one week with you, one week with him?'
Maddie shook her head, surprised. This had all been covered the other day.
âI know it's not what you
prefer
,' said Diana, as if reading her mind. âBut the question is how far would you go for a resolution?'
Maddie frowned and then, not wanting to appear inflexible, tried to run a picture of shared care through her head. She flinched. Out of the corner of her eye she could see Kim looking at her expressionlessly and she knew, without any doubt, what her friend was thinking. She flushed, feeling guilty and annoyed at the same time.
âCertainly not,' said Hannah crossly, into the silence. âAs we explained to you last week, this man is
violent
. So it's about doing the right thing for the
kids
. Which is their mother. Full-time.'
Diana put a hand out, as if wanting to placate. âYes, I know. I understand. I just have to ask, that's all, before I go in there. And as I explained when we met, there is a
presumption
of equal parental responsibility nowadays. I did warn you that what we spoke of was a
best
-case scenario, which means that we should allow room to move. And the magistrate does look kindly on those who show a willingness to negotiate.' She stared levelly at Maddie for a few moments and then thinned her lips, just slightly. âSo I take it there's no room at all? You still want full residence and the father to have supervised access only. With the possibility of every second weekend down the track.'
âThat's right,' said Maddie, wishing the words would sound more certain.
âAnd don't forget he has to do anger management,' added Hannah. âAnd a parenting course.'
âOkay then.' Diana continued reading for a while and then slipped the papers back into her briefcase. âWell, I doubt we'll get a resolution with that but I'll give it my best. Back soon.'
Maddie watched Diana stride across the room in her stilettos. âWhat the hell?' She turned to Hannah. âDon't you think that was a bit odd? I mean she sounded so supportive the other day. When she was doing all that reading, do you think she was reminding herself of what we were about? The case?'
âCertainly not,' replied Hannah, although not as confidently as Maddie would have liked. âAlthough I wish she'd prepared us better, like for the standing down bit. And the fact that there'd even be talk of a resolution.'
âAnd that she'd suddenly apply the pressure like that, so quickly.'
Hannah ran her fingers through her bob, fluffing the hair out. Thinking. âLook, I'm sure it's just she has to be objective, that's all. And find out exactly where we stand. Cover all the bases.'
Maddie nodded slowly, and then stood up to see if she could spot where Diana had gone. She was just in time to see Jake's lawyer disappear into one of the meeting rooms and shut the door behind him. Maddie felt a sudden and surprising urge to join them. Because even stronger than her desire for avoidance was her desire not to be left out. Especially if her own lawyer felt she had to be objective. If that was the case then who, in that room right now, was actually on her side? She turned back to her companions. âAnyone for a coffee?'
âYou sit down.' Kim rose quickly. âI'll get them. White with one?'
Maddie nodded reluctantly. She wanted to
do
something, be proactive in some way. Courtroom four opened again and a lawyer came out, tugging a boxy suitcase on wheels. Maddie walked over to the top of the stairs. From here she could see outside, towards the carpark and the few trees that remained on that side of the road. It occurred to her that these walls, as ordinary as they looked from the outside, had seen as many contests as any celebrated sporting arena. But the big difference was that with most contests there was a straightforward winner. Here the lines were far more blurred and, at the end of the day, she suspected that every single person was a loser to some degree.
The morning crept past with a slowness that became stultifying. Maddie had been right that no compromise would be reached in the initial meeting, but this was followed by a long wait while those cases that
had
reached resolution were prioritised. At one stage Diana and the large lawyer went back into the courtroom to notify the court that consent had not been reached and that the contested hearing was expected to take some time. The clerk immediately pushed them back and they were left staring at several hours with absolutely nothing to do.
Diana promptly vanished, with an assurance that she would be back in plenty of time. And it seemed that Jake and his lawyer had also disappeared. Maddie was reluctant to follow suit, as if by doing so she would miss out on something, or that staying was in itself a necessary torment. But it was impossible to explain this reasoning to Hannah and Kim, so eventually Maddie allowed herself to be persuaded into a temporary absence. Her nerves becoming tenser the longer they were away, so by the time they finished lunch at a Thai restaurant along the main street, she felt as compressed as the spring in the end of a biro. And the food didn't help at all.
After lunch, they said goodbye to Kim who had to be back in Badgerton by midafternoon. And Maddie fancied she saw relief in her friend's face, even as she apologised profusely. She mused on this as she and Hannah settled themselves again in the now-thinned waiting room. Deciding that the relief was either projection, or simply mutual. Because with Kim gone, that was one less person, one less
entity
for Maddie to have to worry about. And, in addition, this evened things up more, with Jake being alone.
Afterwards, when Maddie thought back on this particular part of the day, it seemed that the last thought had barely formulated when Jake came up the stairs once more. But this time, instead of being accompanied by just his lawyer, he had an entourage. With the sight of them Maddie's blood snap-froze. Part of her prayed that her face was also frozen, so that not a single person was able to read how shaken she was inside. First there was his eldest sister Dana, followed by her husband Frank. Close behind was their daughter Jessica and then bringing up the rear, walking stiffly up the stairs, was his mother Lorna. A far older version, her entire body looking like someone had vacuumed all the plumpness away, leaving the skin hanging loosely like curtain swags. So shocked was Maddie by her mother-in-law's appearance that it took her another moment to realise that, by her side, holding her gently by one elbow, was the woman from the airport. Jake's woman. Natalie.