Stricken Resolve (2 page)

I know what ‘
we need to talk means
.’
I’m not in the mood to talk about that shit right now. Or ever, for
that matter. What we have is sweet and simple. I love the comfort I
feel with Cammy. I love her soft lithe body under mine as I pound
her tight pink pussy.

Throwing my legs over the side of the
lounger, I stand, sitting my untouched lemonade on the matching
dark wood table. Leaning over her, I gaze down into her eyes as she
locks her into mine and audibly gulps. That’s right Cammy. We will
not be having any little talks. We will be fucking on this
deck.

“I mean it Johnathan, we need to talk,” she
states firmly with a fierce look in her eye. But those dilated
pupils are giving away to her real need.

I place my finger over of precious pink lips
and hush her.

“No Cammy. No talking. I’m going to sink my
cock into you and you’re going to come screaming my name,” I order,
smirking as the dirty thought of what’s about to happen sinks into
my mind’s forefront.

“No,” she retorts, in almost a whisper
against my fingers, scooting further back onto the lounger, her
bottom lip trembling.

Looming over her, I unzip my pants and drop
them along with my silk boxers to the ground to show her my big
juicy cock. I know she loves it. She’s told me a time or two.

“Open up baby,” I order, never taking my eyes
from hers. She complies and spreads wide, legs shaking. “Don’t
worry Cammy, you know I take care of you,” I smile down at her,
crawling my way up between her legs. I reach out, underneath her
dress to remove her panties.

Fuck yes!

“Somebodies been a naughty-naughty girl. Not
wearing any panties.” I tsk, playfully. “Why aren’t you wearing
any, Cammy?” I demand with a deep tone. I don’t think I can wait
much longer to claim that tight little hole. I’ve needed to fuck
all day since I woke up this morning dreaming about Emily. I jacked
in the shower, but that only satisfies a small portion of my
insatiable male rock star hunger.

“I...” She bites her lip and swallows hard.
“I know you’ve been out of sorts and I heard you moaning in your
sleep last night. Must have been quite a dream. So, when I woke up
this morning I thought maybe you’d like some.” She gazes down at
her privates. “I left them off, just in case.” Her voice is small,
so fragile and sweet. My heart yearns to make it scream, and take
the questioning from her tone. Like she’s asking me permission if
it’s okay to be this way. The longer we’ve been together, the more
she submits to me. At the same time I can tell her insecurities
grow, as each little brick from her wall comes crashing down.
That’s what I love about her. At least she lets me know her and
love her. Unlike somebody else.

Stop thinking about her right now! You douche
bag. This is why Emily didn’t want to you to begin with. You can’t
be good for one fucking moment. Grrrrr.

I grasp Cammy’s chin and tilt it up to keep
eye contact.

“Baby, I love that fucking pussy. I fucking
love you.” I know it comes out lustful but I’m so close to busting
a damn bolt over here I can’t wait another second.

I quickly grasp her knees and pull her down,
throw up her dress and stab my cock into her hole relentlessly,
without question and she screams out my name. That’s right, Cammy.
Love my cock! My colossal thickness. Her pussy grips around me like
a vice. Oh, that sweet little hole.

“I love you, Johnathan!” She moans loudly, as
I pound into her over and over. Shit, that’s slick. She’s so wet
for me.

Bending forward, I capture her mouth and jet
my tongue inside. Fervently kissing her. I groan, as I can feel my
thickness swell and I know I’m going to come real soon. It never
lasts long with her. Dammit, yep, I’m on the brink.

“You’re going to make me come,” I grunt,
resting my thick chest against hers.

“Come,” she murmurs, panting, her nails
clawing deeply into my back.

‘You’re all I ever wanted, you’re all I ever
needed, so tell me what to do now, cause’ I want you back.’ My
phone sings N’Sync garishly and vibrates on the deck, still tucked
securely into my pants pocket.

I instantly still myself inside of Cammy,
hastily pull myself out of her tightness and dive onto the ground
for my phone. It’s Emily! She’s calling me! That’s her ringtone.
Stacy told me about her childhood obsession with N’Sync so it kind
of stuck.

“Hi baby,” I answer in a long breath. Unable
to control my excitement.

Cammy sits up and groans, pulling her dress
down over her nakedness. Shit! I fucked up again.

‘I’m sorry,’ I mouth to Cammy as I hold the
phone to my ear with my shoulder and slide my jeans back on,
leaving my blue boxers on the deck. She rolls her eyes and exits
without a single word, her delicious lips drawn into a taut
line.

I’m in the dog house now.

“Hi Johnathan,” my Short Stack responds, in a
long saddened drawl. She sounds terrible.

“What’s wrong? Are you okay? Do you need me
to come and see you? I can come right now. I miss you so much,” I
spill out, sounding as desperate as I feel. I can’t help it. I long
for her. Even in my dreams, it’s not my mother’s murder anymore.
It’s Emily or the twins. She consumes me, and what part she
doesn’t, Cammy fills with her love and support.

Motherfucker, I’m a real head case.

I peer over to the glass of lemonade she’d
made for me. Did I seriously just stop having sex with my
semi-committal secret girlfriend to talk to the woman who’s engaged
to her bodyguard and doesn’t want me?

My gut suddenly twists into wretched pain. I
sit down on the lounger and grasp my abs, taking in a long deep
breath. It’s confirmed, I’m the biggest piece of shit that’s ever
lived. How can I do this to Cammy? I hurt Emily enough. I can’t do
this to another woman. A woman who actually cares for me and has
helped me so much in life. I don’t know what I would have done
without her.

Oh shit, my stomach! It twists again and I
swallow hard to push the bile back down.

“Johnathan, are you okay?” Em questions,
concern saturating her words.

“Huh?” I mutter, confused. Rubbing my
forehead with my free hand.

“I just said I was fine. You went quiet. I
wanted to call because I haven’t seen you in a few days and I was
worried.”

I clear my throat purposely into the phone.
Sureeee… she was worried. Not. She’s got fucking James.

“You. Are. Not. Worried about me. You’ve got
that hot shot fiancé bodyguard to protect and care for you.”

“Fuck off, Johnathan. I do too worry about
you. Whether you like to think so or not,” she snaps, obviously
raging pissed. I don’t know of many times she’s not angry with me,
at one point or another during a conversation.

“Well, nothing to be worried about here.
Stacy and Kyle are off on a short vacation before the babies come.
I’m working a lot, Cammy is taking care of the house and
Dylan…,”

“MAMA BEAR!” Dylan shouts, pounding his
little four year old feet up the steps of the raised deck. “Is that
Mama Bear?” Dylan grabs my knee with one hand and swipes his sleepy
eyes with the other. His hair all mussed from laying down.

“Aren’t you supposed to be down for a nap?” I
squint at him speculatively.

“I up now. That Mama Bear?” he asks again,
less patient this time.

I nod.

“Me talk,” he orders, his eyes staring
intently at the phone pressed to my ear.

“Is that Dylan?” Em inquires. The love she
has for him shining brightly in her words.

“Yes, he must have super power hearing to
know I was outside on the phone with you. Do you want to talk with
him or finish with me first?”

“Just tell him to go inside and watch Nick
because Bubble Guppies is on. And I’ll call him later to chat about
the episode.”

This woman is doing everything in her power
to be close with Dylan even from the hospital. Every day she
watches children’s shows to talk with him about. He’s learned a lot
from her. Emily will make an amazing mother. What isn’t she amazing
at? Other than not wanting me? Scratch that, she is amazingly
talented at making sure I know she doesn’t want me. It’s painfully
obvious.

I sigh and relay the message to Dylan, who
lights up like a Christmas tree and goes scurrying off into the
house, headed undoubtedly to Emily’s bedroom to watch Bubble
Guppies on Nick.

“So…” I groan into the phone. I have no idea
why she really called. This isn’t like her to go out of her way to
chat with me. I’m the one who texts or calls. I can’t even remember
the last time she’s phoned me.

“Well...” She hesitates. “I wanted to tell
you that the babies are good. And…I’m…not sure how all this going
to work...”

Work? Huh?

“Please clarify for me, Short Stack. What
working?”

She huffs into the receiver, clearly
frustrated.

“You, me, James, twins…Is it really hard to
understand, and I need to know what’s going to happen. I’m
seriously stressing over here. I called as soon as James left the
room for a moment. I can’t talk about this in front of him. He
swears my concerns aren’t
that
big of a deal. Yes, they are.
I can’t bring babies into this world Johnathan, with you hating him
and none of us having a place to live—”

What the fuck!

“Whoa! Wait a damn minute. You have a home. I
bought this fucking house for
us.
Or don’t you remember
that?” I bark angrily, cutting her off.

I spent twenty million dollars of my damn
money and bought this big ass beach house for her and our children.
My old place had three bedrooms, two baths and a two car garage. It
wasn’t anything special. I didn’t feel the need to upgrade,
regardless of how much dough I’m worth. But then she walks into my
life and I suddenly see myself marrying her. Well, before I found
out that I was going to be a father. Did she want that? Hell no!
She thought I viewed her as some stupid floosy bimbo, like the rest
of the hoes I’ve graced my bed with before. Emily’s not stupid, nor
a floosy or bimbo.

A sniffle stifles into my ear. Awe shit!
She’s crying!

“Don’t cry baby,” I coax her with a sweet
tone. I didn’t mean to make her cry. Dammit, now I feel like even
more of an ass.

“I… I…Don’t know what to do!” she wails.

Crying Short Stack? Wow. This is a new side.
Where’s my bitchy Short Stack gone to?

“Sweetheart, calm down. You’ll move into the
house here with the twins. I will make sure everything is set up
properly. Don’t worry. Just take a deep breath for me. Don’t cry,
Short Stack.”

She breaks another sob into the phone and my
chest aches. God, I hate hearing her like this. My baby. My sassy
but sweet Emily.

“Sweetheart?” I ask, trying to make sure she
is still paying attention.

“Y…es?”

“You need to calm down.”

“Okay… I just don’t know what to do! I’m
stuck in this bed. I’m miserable and itchy and horny. And I can’t
have an orgasm, Johnathan. You don’t understand. I can’t have
any
. My body hurts. I don’t know how much longer I can take
this. They won’t let me walk around. They just put a full time
catheter in me two days ago. I’m dilating, even though I’m not
supposed to be and I have to make sure these babies stay in me at
least another few weeks. I feel like a failure. I can’t even carry
babies properly. My legs look like a caveman’s and…. And… this
all…just sucks...” she states, a little more put together this
time.

Yes, she’s all of those things and before
this she was stressed and in emotional pain because of me. Now
she’s in physical pain because of me. Is there anything that’s not
my fault?

“Well, let me ease some of your burden and
take care of the house. You have a place to live, baby. Here with
me, Cammy, Dylan, Stacy and Kyle….and…” Ah, fuck. I don’t want to
say this. I really don’t want to agree to this. Here goes to making
my life cataclysmically worse.

“James,” I blurt out fast and suck in a deep
almost painful breath. My fingers rubbing the lines on my forehead,
as I toss my head forcefully back against the lounger.

His name leaving my lips is agonizing enough.
And now for the sake of the woman I love I will suck this up and
live with her fucking fiancé.
Her fiancé
. Goddamn that
sounds awful, unless the name Johnathan Striker were in front of
that sentiment.

“You don’t—”

I cut her off again. I know what she’s going
to argue about and I’ve made up my sadistic mind. “No, I
do
have to. We’ll be one big happy fucking family.” I try to sound
funny but I know I probably sound like a complete sarcastic
bastard.

“Thank you,” she whispers and my heart
instantly warms.

I made my baby happy. That’s all that
matters. At least I did one right thing today. Now it’s time to go
make things up to the other woman I love.

We speak for a few more moments and she
finally calms down. I hang up and stand, tucking iPhone into my
jeans pocket.

Onward, I traipse down the stairs; out of the
frying pain and into the fire, I go.

Chapter Two

~James~

“What do you mean I have to come in?” I
demand in a level tone.

“Master Sergeant, I deeply regret to have to
inform you, but the government needs the information you have
stored. We will be sending a team to collect you at O-eight
hundred, on Thursday. That should give you a few days to get your
affairs in order,” the man on the other end of the line, some
Sergeant Major Thomas, says.

“You don’t understand sir, my fiancé is due
to deliver twins very soon. Can’t this wait a few weeks? She’s on
bed rest in the hospital. I need to be here for her,” I plead,
strongly.

There is no way I am leaving
my
pregnant lady to go off and work for the government. When I signed
up for this after being discharged from the military. I never
thought they’d actually call me in. Davis, Johnathan’s bodyguard
and my close and personal friend was in the same program at the
same time. I wonder if they’re ordering him to come in too. Not
that I can discuss this with him anyhow.