Suffering & Salvation
Suffering & Salvation
Celia Kyle & Kenzie James
Published: January 2012
Published by Summerhouse Publishing. Copyright, Celia Kyle, Kenzie James. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. This book contains material protected under International and Federal Copyright Laws and Treaties. Any unauthorized reprint or use of this material is prohibited. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system without express written permission from the author.
Summerhouse Publishing
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Editor
Craig Kim
Cover Artist
Celia Kyle
This is a work of fiction. The characters, incidents and dialogues in this book are of the author’s imagination and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events or persons, living or dead, is completely coincidental.
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They met over the gravy boat. Literally. Both sniffing and inhaling, getting closer and closer by the second…
Simi was cold and starving, and the chill air of winter seemed to sink right into her bones, no matter how many layers she’d piled on. Too bad going furry wasn’t exactly the answer to her problem. People might find it a bit disconcerting to see a golden cougar running around the streets of downtown.
So she stayed upright in human form, trudging through the slushy snow, searching for a place to stay for the night. Temperatures were supposed to drop below zero, and she needed somewhere to hide. To eat.
And when she least expected it, for once, God answered her prayers, her salvation emerging in the form of a conversation she overheard. Plodding past a burn barrel, two men were talking about Satisfied Women’s Shelter & Soup Kitchen, complaining they’d get a meal, but not much else. Spouting off that the director was a mean bitch that discriminated against men, saving all the available cots for the female kind.
Simi didn’t have to understand the reasoning. Right now, she and the animal counterpart inside her, Cougar, needed a warm place to stay. And even if it was for just one night, Satisfied sounded like it could offer them a temporary safe haven from the bitter cold. For someone on the run, just like her. So beaten down, broken, brainwashed, that it had taken near death for her to finally have the courage to leave, only to find she really had nowhere to go. At least, not far enough away from Malcolm. She knew he’d find her—it was just a matter of when.
Should she risk it? Risk Malcolm finding her at the shelter? Until now, she’d shied away from those places, stayed under the radar so she wouldn’t be caught. When she’d run, she did it with the clothes on her back, her winter coat the only luxury she’d been able to take with her. Little money, no credit cards. Malcolm had everything under lock and key. Speaking of which, she was down to her last five dollar bill, and with her metabolism demanding more sustenance than she could scrounge from dumpsters, Simi’s stomach imposed its will and made the decision for her—to seek out the shelter.
Cautiously making her way through the entrance to Satisfied, she knew it was a risk, but to her, a much needed and calculated one. Cold weather meant warm food, hopefully more food than she’d had in past couple of weeks. Cougar was restless, hungry, whining every day that it needed more, needed out…just needed something other than sleeping in the cold, digging through trash. Running on empty, the animal in her was tired of hiding.
Standing in line to be served, Simi watched the man holding the gravy boat across from her, glad that Cougar had urged her to seek out the shelter in the first place. He was gorgeous in a rough way. A black five o’clock shadow covered the lower half of his face, the color matching his dark hair, its gentle waves just begging for her to run her fingers through the tresses. His eyes were a piercing green, like perfect emeralds glowing in the dim light of the dining room.
“Gravy, little one?”
Simi jerked, unaware that she’d been staring, deep in thought for so long. She’d backed up the line while lost in her daydreaming. “Yes, please,” she whispered, the sound barely audible to even her own heightened sense of hearing, but nevertheless, she hoped the stranger had heard her.
Cougar whimpered, anxious to eat, like a ravenous animal, wanting to devour the entire turkey she’d passed by. But Simi persevered. She’d be eating well enough for the evening. And if she were lucky, there might even be a bed or a corner she could occupy for the night.
The volunteer ladled the steaming brown fluid over her turkey, mashed potatoes and stuffing, and with a humble nod, she whispered, “Thank you.”
She moved down the line, taking a roll and silverware from other volunteers. Edging along behind fellow unfortunates like herself, she nearly dropped her tray when a soft touch landed on her jacketed arm.
Mr. Five O’clock Shadow stood there, concern marring his features, brows pinched and lips drawn into a frown. “Hey, it’s okay. Just thought you might want to eat somewhere else. You know, away from here.” He pulled his hand away, ever-so-slowly, holding his palms outward, as if to show he didn’t mean her any harm. “Easy.” The man dropped his voice as she had earlier. “It seems as if you’re not exactly comfortable around people, little one. Or should I call you…little
cat?
”
She’d guessed right. Or scented, rather. She hadn’t given it a second thought, but she’d caught the hint of something while being served by him. Something earthy and wild and free. Whatever he held within, it was pleased with his human counterpart. She too longed for a bit of happiness. If only she knew how…
She nodded, trying her best to form a smile with her unwilling lips.
“Come along, hon.”
He turned away and she followed. Simi glanced back every so often, checking faces but recognizing none. Didn’t mean she hadn’t been followed. Didn’t mean any of the people in the room weren’t looking for her. Malcolm had spies.
Everywhere.
The volunteer reached a door and opened it, beckoning her to enter. She slid past him, not touching. Never touching. It was a rule. One of Malcolm’s many rules.
She shook her head, dispelling the life she’d once known. With Malcolm, anything and everything had rules. Simi knew she needed to forget them now, if she ever wanted to give herself a chance at a fresh start.
She slid into the chair in front of the massive desk occupying the office, then placed her tray on the smooth, wooden surface. The volunteer sat opposite Simi, and it just dawned on her that he had a tray of food as well.
“I’m Brand.”
She hugged herself. Would he want something for this kindness? Things were
different
on the streets…with a bartering system she’d yet to take part in. But the idea of trading her body…no…she just couldn’t see herself giving up the only thing that was hers.
“Simone. But I go by Simi.” Because
he’d
called her Simone, as did the parents that never loved her.
“Simi. I like it.”
Her knees bounced, hunger gnawing at her stomach.
“Go ahead and eat, little one. Kitty has to be hungry. Don’t want her angry at me for keeping you from food.” He winked, a half-smile curving his lips, a gesture that instantly helped her warm up. He seemed lighthearted and kind. Fed her, understood her need to be secluded, but she was too tired and hungry to begin the process of reasoning with the hows and whys.
At least, that was the way he seemed. But once she ate, if he tried to get over on her, she’d fight him. Cougar could take him. Simi could smell it distinctly now, the scent concentrated in the office: he was definitely wolf.
She shoved a bite of a roll into her mouth. Blood sugar low, she knew the carbs would help raise it back up, ease the shaking. Next came a forkful of turkey. Cooked to perfection, it practically melted in her mouth. That or she was so starved she was imagining things. She moaned around the food, not caring how needy she sounded. Cougar purred as her stomach was filled with delicious food.
“Kitty’s happy I take it?” His friendly expression was only outshined by his warm smile. It lit up his face, showing how handsome he truly was. It also seemed to make him appear less…foreign to her.
“Cougar,” she mumbled around a mouthful of mashed potatoes.
He nodded as he made a popping sound with his lips. “Cougar, then.”
Bite after bite went into her mouth, hunger pains easing with each passing second. She ate it all. The stuffing, mashed potatoes, bread, yams, turkey and gravy, until every bit of food on her plate had disappeared.
She still wanted, but thankfully, the ache in her stomach she’d felt was fading now. Simi backed away from the table, huddling in the chair, knees drawn up to her chin. Cougar was pleased, if not completely happy.
Cougar paced within, the feeling of longing projected to Simi. Strange, her animal
wanted,
but Simi couldn’t quite put her finger on
what
she wanted because Cougar wouldn’t just come out and say it.
Brand pushed the other tray forward, swapping it for the now empty one. “Keep going. Cougar probably hasn’t had a decent meal in a while, huh?” He raised his eyebrow, as if daring her to lie.
Cougar perked up, eyes wide and licking her chops.
Ah, that was what her animal wanted. More food. The beast in her wasn’t quite done yet. “No, she hasn’t.” Simi wasn’t too proud to take the offering the man gave. The truth hurt, but little trumped hunger anymore. Even her pride.
“Go ahead, then. When you’re full, maybe we can talk a bit? Find you someplace warm to sleep?”
She wondered whether there was a hint of
suggestion
in the man’s tone. Cougar told her not to worry, but still, Simi was wary. She’d grown to trust in her nature, Cougar, from the moment she’d escaped, but Simi had been beaten for so long by Malcolm that she couldn’t help but be cautious.
In the end, she just nodded and proceeded to eat the food from the second tray, the one she knew was meant for him. That thought had her feeling some regret. “This is yours. You should eat.” She pushed the tray toward him only to have it nudged back.
“No, I brought it for you.
Wolfenstein
is fine. We’re more than happy to provide for you, little cat—I mean, Cougar.” His face softened as he offered words of endearment, and in doing so, chipped a little more of her protective layer away.
Cougar purred from within, rolling onto her back and baring her belly. Her initial surprise at Cougar’s trusting behavior was immediately replaced by laughter and a snort.
“Wolfenstein?” She raised her eyebrows, unbelieving that a shifter would humiliate his counterpart so…cruelly. Funny, but cruel, nonetheless.
“He likes being called Wolfie. Wolfie loved the video game.”
“Really? Just Wolfie, and not you?”
He laughed and rocked back in the chair, placing his hands behind his head, pulling his shirt tight against his chest…and when he did, she very nearly whimpered. His chest looked strong and well-developed.
Strong.
That word didn’t accurately describe what she felt coming from him. Fierce. Fierce fit better. She sensed he was a fighter. Outwardly gentle perhaps, but still a fighter deep down.
“Okay, you got me. Wolfie and
I
enjoyed the game. But he liked it so much that he wouldn’t shut up about being named after it.” Brand shrugged. “So, Wolfenstein it was.” He leaned forward, index finger to his lips, whispering, “Shh…don’t tell my parents, though. They’d have a fit.”
“Why not?”
He shuddered, but she took the action as a joke. “If they were to find out I named him something other than…well…Wolf, they’d be upset with me.”
“Why—?”
“’Cause they’re pretty old-fashioned.”
Simi closed the distance between them and lowered her voice. “Your secret’s safe with me.”
Only inches separating them, their scents mingled while they hovered over the desk.
“I have a confession to make…I want to kiss you, little cat.”
Cougar chuffed and purred from within, letting her know that she’d like to be kissed as well. “Cougar wants you to.”
He tilted his head to the side, as if examining her. “What does Simi want?”