Survival -Guardians of Vesturon [1] (31 page)

Bloody hell, this cannot not happening
, Therron thought.

He finally threw his mind into Rykerian’s and that got Rykerian’s attention. Then they started their telepathic conversation.

Therron:
What are you thinking? You cannot possibly be thinking that. Rayn is your brother, for the love of the Deity.

Rykerian:
Newsflash, Therron! Do you not think I know that? I have tried everything I know to do. Why do you think I have been out on patrol most of the time? I cannot take being near her. I feel like I am betraying Rayn, but I am not doing this on purpose
.

Therron:
Then stop it, now. You can control your thoughts; just do not go there. She is nearly your sister, for heaven’s sake. You cannot be doing this.

Rykerian:
I know that. For the love of the Deity, tell me something I do
not
know. I do not want to think this way. I have done everything I know not to think this way, but my mind refuses to listen to me. It is not like I am trying to be malicious. I did not ask for this; I never expected this. And you know I would never in a million years act on this either. I simply cannot help the way I feel nor I do expect you to understand.

Therron:
Oh, dear Deity, does anyone else know about this?

Rykerian:
Heavens above, no, absolutely not. And I do not want you to tell anyone. If you had minded your own bloody business and not barged into my head like that
you
would not even know. Do you know what torture this has been? How would
you
like to live under the same roof as the female you so admired, knowing there would never be anything you could do about it other than call her sister someday? How would
you
feel, Therron, if you were in my shoes? How would
you
like it knowing that the female you felt so strongly about belonged to your brother? Tell me, how would
you
feel?

Therron:
Damn, Rykerian, I am so sorry about all of this.

Therron was feeling the whole brunt of Rykerian’s emotions, and it was cutting him to the core. Rykerian was in pain. Therron wanted to help, but didn’t know how.

Therron:
When?

Rykerian:
The first moment Rayn brought her here. One look and I…Therron, I honestly do not know what to do. She is all I can think of.

Neither of them heard the door to the gym open, nor did they see Maddie walk in and head toward the stack of work out DVD’s. They were still telecommunicating and suddenly, Maddie felt a force against her that literally lifted her up in the air and knocked her on an exercise mat.

Maddie didn’t know what had happened at first, but Rykerian had been projecting his thoughts so forcefully, they even penetrated Maddie’s mind. When she comprehended what was taking place between them, she looked up to see two pairs of eyes on her. Rykerian’s face metamorphosed into a mask of pure agony, and Therron’s was displaying utter shock.

Rykerian jumped off the treadmill and rushed out the door.

Maddie shook her head, as if to clear it. Her mind was not able to understand the gravity of the situation. When it all finally hit her, she exploded off the mat, chasing after Rykerian.

“Rykerian, wait! Please wait,” Maddie begged.

“Leave him alone, Maddie. He needs his space right now,” Therron recommended.

“But, Therron, I heard everything in his mind. I need to go to him.”

“No, you don’t. He needs to be away from you. He is…” Therron began.

“I know, Therron. He thinks he’s in love with me. I understand that. I heard him. But right now, he is in pain, and I think I’m the only one that can help him,” Maddie yelled as she ran out of the room.

She quickly headed outside to try to find Rykerian. She went into the garages where he could usually be found, tinkering with things. When he wasn’t there, she was headed back into the house, and that’s when she saw him sitting near the fire pit.

“Hey, you,” she started, as she approached him.

“Maddie, please. I cannot talk to you right now. I am humiliated beyond reason. I never intended for you, or anyone else for that matter, to discover this about me. It is my own problem, and I must learn to deal with it.”

He turned his back to her. His face was flushed with embarrassment, and he simply could not bear to let her see him this way.

“But, Rykerian,” she began.

“Do you not understand?” he shot back. “I cannot bear to talk with you. Being near you is painful for me; truthfully, it is quite miserable. I do not want your pity or anything right now. I just want to be alone. Sweet Deity, of all the things to happen! Talk about bad timing!” His agitation was disarming.

“It’s not the end of the world. I know you don’t want me to be here, but I’m not listening to you right now. You are not in love with me; you only think you are. You don’t even know me, Rykerian, other than the little exposure you’ve had here. Right now, you are confused and embarrassed because I heard your thoughts,” Maddie tried to rationalize.

“Oh, really, Miss Astrophysicist!” he said snidely, striking out at her. “Wouldn’t you be? Tell me any different, and I will call you a liar right here and now. Bloody hell, you know nothing about me either; how I have thought about you every waking moment since first we met. I am not even trying to do that; I just fell for the wrong girl. So please, leave me so that I can retain one tiny bit of my dignity.”

His voice was raised in anger, and Maddie didn’t quite know how to respond to him. She had never seen him act this way.

She stubbornly refused to back away and not try to resolve this. “Sorry, Rykerian, you’re going to have to get used to me being around and won’t it be easier now that I know?”

“You have got to be kidding, right? What are you anyway? ‘Miss I can solve all of your problems?’ I do not need to hear any of your psychobabble right now. I just want to be alone. What about that can you not understand?” He was rubbing his temples, as if a huge headache had hit him.

“Call me a slow learner, but I’m not walking away from you right now. Look, you know how I feel about Sharra and all the brothers. You all are the greatest things to enter my life other than Rayn. I honestly don’t know what I would do without you. We can work this out. Rykerian, we
have
to work this out. There is no alternative. If it’s difficult for you, we’ll figure out how to deal with it. I just don’t want you to be hurting like you are now.” She had come up behind him and placed her hand on his back.

He jerked away from her, as if he had been burned. “Impossible, Maddie. We cannot work it out. There is nothing to work out,” he said through gritted teeth as he moved away from her, trying to put some distance between them. “The only way I could deal with it would be to leave. And I cannot do that right now.” He paused and then turned to her and added softly, “Please, I truly want to be alone, before I say something that I will later regret. Please? I am begging here, Maddie.”

She was deeply saddened by his pain. “Okay, Rykerian. I’ll leave it be for now, but this conversation isn’t over. Rykerian, sometimes you cannot control everything that happens to you. Just so you know, I am honored you feel this way. And one other thing, I promise not to speak of this to anyone. Just know that if you need to talk, I am here for you.” She turned and walked away, leaving Rykerian alone and still feeling humiliated.

“How had it come to this?” he wondered. He also wondered how he could ever make it through the next few weeks.

As Maddie headed back to the house in search of Therron, she heard the loud roar of Rykerian’s Lamborghini come to life, followed by the squeal of his tires as he sped down the road. She was in turmoil over what had happened. She needed to discuss it with someone, and Therron was the only one she could talk to about it.

She found him in the kitchen, and thankfully, he was alone. “He wouldn’t talk with me, and I feel just awful about all of this.”

“Not your fault, Maddie, and honestly, this is a bit uncomfortable for me to talk about as well. I think we should just leave it and let Rykerian deal with it in his own way.”

“But—”

Therron quickly cut her off, “No ‘buts’ Maddie. Just think about it if you were in his shoes. He is embarrassed and disgraced by it all. He never intended for his thoughts to get out. I have put him in a terrible position.” Therron sat down and dropped his head into his hands. “He is at great odds with himself; you for one, but also he feels as if he is betraying Rayn somehow. It is best to just walk away and let him deal with it.”

“I guess you’re right. I feel like all of this is my fault. I somehow happen to be a bad luck charm,” she bit back.

“Why would you say that? You did not ask for any of this.”

“True, but almost everyone I’ve ever been close to has experienced some really yucky things. Look, you must admit, my parents, then Rayn, and now Rykerian. I have to ask myself who will be next.”

“You must stop thinking that way. Rayn is where he is because he chose that, Maddie. You had nothing to do with the deaths of your parents, and what Rykerian is experiencing is not your fault in any way.”

“Not directly, but I still cannot help but feel this way. Therron, how will Rykerian handle Rayn?”

“Maddie, Rykerian would walk through fire to do anything for Rayn. Do not worry about that. That is why he is such a mess over all of this; his love for his brother is deeply rooted in him. That is also why he would never act on his feelings for you. You will always be safe around him. Let us pretend all of this never happened, that we never discovered his secret. I am sure that would be best for everyone.”

“Okay, but on one condition: if anything happens where Rykerian is in need, I would ask that you let me know. I couldn’t live with myself knowing that he suffered, and I did nothing to help. Can you make that promise to me?” She had taken a hold of his arm and was tightly gripping it.

“
I foreswear before you that if my brother Rykerian is suffering and in need of your assistance, you shall be made aware of it
,” he replied in the Ancient Tongue. He was standing before her with his hand over his heart, so she knew he had just sworn an oath to her. “Maddie, you have my word that I will let you know.”

“Thank you, Therron.” She leaned over and gave him a hug, turned and left the room.

Therron sat there staring after her as she left, still worried about how Rykerian was going to work through all of this.

Brother, you are going to have to find it within you to get through all of this and what lies ahead,
Therron thought.

Zanna was busy doing her usual, cleaning and laundry, when Maddie crossed her path. Zanna became slightly suspicious when Maddie began asking about dinner. She was interested in what Zanna had planned for that night. Since it was so early in the day, Zanna hadn’t begun her preparations, so she explained that to Maddie.

Later that day, Zanna would be chastising herself for not picking up on Maddie’s clues.

Maddie had been contemplating how she could do something special for the family. Ever since Rayn’s departure, they had gone to great lengths to see her every whim satisfied. They had entertained her, kept her company, taught her many things, and Maddie had honestly been enjoying herself. The first morning after Rayn was gone, Maddie opened her bedroom door to a large pile of boxes. They were filled with all sorts of clothing: beautiful designer tops and jeans, skirts, sweaters and things made from Vesturion fabric. Everything fit perfectly, so she no longer had wardrobe issues.

However, Maddie had reached a point where she wanted to do something significant for them in return. Cooking them a big dinner came to mind. She could surprise them, and it would also give Zanna a break. The only obstacle in her plans was that she didn’t really know how to cook. But how hard could that be? She could always turn on the Food Network and follow their instructions. That’s exactly what she decided to do.

Off she went in search of ideas and recipes. She turned on the TV in the kitchen and decided to try a recipe from Rachel Ray’s “
30 Minute Meals
” show.

Surely,
Maddie thought,
I can do this.

Her dish of choice that night was going to be pretzel-encrusted chicken. The kitchen had all the ingredients in stock so she began to get everything out that the dish required.

Maddie painstakingly crushed the pretzels and added the extra ingredients. It called for a dash of cayenne pepper but when she opened the bottle, she lost her grip, it flew up in the air and landed with a plop right on top of the crushed pretzels. Unfortunately, about half the bottle ended up in there. Not knowing what to do, Maddie figured there would be no harm in just mixing it all together. She was unaware of what cayenne pepper was so she continued to prepare the chicken and the rest of the ingredients.

The recipe called for pan sautéing the chicken in several tablespoons of olive oil, or EVOO, as Rachel called it. Since she was making two pans, she decided she would need a lot more oil than that, so she poured a healthy dose of it in the pan. She put it over the medium high flame to heat up. When she thought it was hot enough, she added the chicken after she had coated it with the pretzel mixture.

Next, she transferred the cooked chicken to the oven while she prepared the second batch. She decided to add a bit more oil and waited for it to heat up. Something caught her attention, and she realized she hadn’t started cutting up the vegetables she was going to make. She headed for the sink to begin that task. Several minutes later, she heard a popping noise, turned around and saw that the pan was in flames. Maddie was in a state of pandemonium not knowing what to do. Luckily, the alarm system deployed and everyone started arriving in the kitchen. By this time, the flames were simply out of control. Therron grabbed a fire extinguisher and hosed down the fire.

“Are you okay?” he asked.

Maddie was in a daze, not believing what had just happened.

Therron came up to her and grabbed her arms saying, “Maddie, answer me! Are you okay?”