Sweet Submission: Jenny and Max Complete Series Plus Bonus Short Story (3 page)

It wasn’t all bad. Though he was short with me, Max was kind and patient with Lily. He let us share the bedroom while he slept on the couch. We begrudgingly tolerated each other, and as two people who had nowhere else to go, there was a silent empathy there, a respect, even.

One night, I was feeling particularly down. I put Lily to sleep early, then sat down with the ancient bottle of wine I’d found in the cabinets and dwelled on my sorry situation. The wine was a bit bitter, but it did the job.

I didn’t realize how late it had gotten until Max came home. He was once again shirtless and covered in blood, like he’d walked directly out of the ring and came home without stopping to dress or wipe his face. When he saw I was still up, he grunted. These were the most awkward times, when we were alone without Lily for a distraction. There was a wall between us, which neither of us knew how to climb. But it looked like Lily and I were going to be here for a while, so one of us had to make an effort.

“Are you hungry?” I asked from the couch. “I can reheat the leftovers from dinner.”

Max grabbed a protein shake from the fridge. “No,” he said, then took a long swig. “I don’t like to eat after a fight.”

I sat up straight, resolving not to let him shut me out. “You need to replenish the energy you lost during the fight.” I stood up and walked into the kitchen. “Sit down. Let me make you a plate.”

To my surprise, Max sat down without argument. I turned my back to him, smiling secretly as I assembled the braised chicken and broccoli I’d cooked for dinner. When it was ready, I placed the plate in front of Max, along with a large drink of water.

“You need to rehydrate,” I explained. “Protein shakes aren’t going to cut it.”

Max picked up the glass and took a small sip. I nodded, satisfied, and sat down across from him. I was confused when Max didn’t pick up his silverware, and sat quietly gazing into his lap. I thought at first he was refusing to eat, then he mumbled something to himself, picked up his head, and dug in.

“You pray?” I blurted out.

“Yes,” he said. “Do you?”

I laughed, but he didn’t. It was such a foreign concept to me, praying. Growing up, my family wasn’t very religious. Todd hated religion, saying it was it was something powerful people used to control the masses.

“No,” I said, quietly.

Max went back to eating, and the subject was dropped.

“This is good,” he commented. “I don’t usually eat this many vegetables.”

“Well, you should,” I said, grasping on to this tiny thread of conversation. “For the vitamins, and for the fiber.”

Max popped a large piece of cauliflower into his mouth. “So, you used to be a nurse or something?”

“A labor and delivery nurse,” I said, smiling as I remembered my days of delivering babies. “It was the best job. I never got tired of seeing a new mother looking at her baby for the very first time.”

“Why’d you quit?” Max asked.

I circled my finger around the wineglass. “Todd, my husband, didn’t want me working after I got pregnant with Lily. It wasn’t what I wanted to do, but he insisted. I’m sorry, I know you don’t want to hear about this.”

“No, it’s okay,” Max said. He slid his hand forward on the table, and his fingertips almost touched mine. I looked up, and was shocked to see a gentleness in his eyes. He looked like a completely different person. Everything about him was hard and rough, his body, his attitude, his job. I peered into his eyes, and saw a tenderness. Max quickly looked away.

“Did he beat you or something?” Max said, as if he were asking about the weather.

“No, it wasn’t physical,” I said. “But now I understand I was abused emotionally. It doesn’t sound that bad, but he wore me down everyday. I couldn’t do anything right, and he let me know it. On top of that, there was the lying and the cheating.”

“If it makes you feel better,” Max said, looking down shyly. “This place has never been so clean. And your food is really good. I think I do have more energy from the vegetables. I won the fight tonight, my first win in a while.” He looked to me, tentatively. “So that should tell you that this Todd doesn’t know what he’s talking about.”

Our eyes locked, and we smiled at each other. I couldn’t put into words how grateful I was to hear that. My attention turned to the cut above his eye. It wasn’t healing properly. I leaned towards him, and he flinched away.

“That cut, I think it needs stitches,” I said. “I have a first aid kit. Won’t you let me fix it for you?”

Max pushed his empty plate away and groaned. “I would like the swelling to go down. Go ahead, give it a shot.”

I retrieved my first aid kit from the closet, and set up everything I’d need on the table. Max leaned his head back, allowing him to examine him.

“Try to relax,” I said. “I don’t have any anesthesia, so this is going to hurt. Do you want a sip of wine?”

Max nodded, his eyes clenched shut. I poured a glass of wine and handed it to him. He drank most of it in two long swigs.

“Tastes terrible,” he said, slamming the glass down on the table.

“But it works,” I said.

While examining the cut, I saw that it wasn’t infected. It couldn’t heal properly because the cut was too deep. Max barely flinched as I cleaned the wound with alcohol.

“You’ll only need three stitches,” I said. “This won’t take long.”

Max nodded, and gripped the table in front of him. I threaded the needle, then started sewing him up. Max took a sharp breath in and gripped the table so hard I thought he’d launch it against the room.

“Doing okay?” I said after the first stitch was completed.

“Just get on with it,” Max said.

I steadied my hand. The cut was deeper at this point, and the stitches were going to hurt a lot more. As I completed the second stitch, Max let out a loud wail.

“Almost done,” I said.

I dove into the third stitch. This was the deepest part of the cut. My thread got stuck, and I had to pull on it until it finally yanked free. Max screamed. After I quickly got the last stitch through, Max reached up and grabbed my wrist.

I was astonished by the strength of his grip, and a sudden shock of fear went through me. I looked down at him, my eyes wide with terror, but his expression calmed me. There was that look again, tender, gentle. He zeroed in my on face, and my heart started to thump. I felt a pull towards him, and he seemed to feel the same thing. I took in a ragged breath, almost expecting him to kiss me.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to grab you” Max said, quickly looking away. “That was involuntary.”

I trembled slightly from the adrenaline rushing through me. “The hard part’s over. I just need to tie up the ends.”

*

It took Todd three weeks to text. By the time I heard from him, I’d gotten a job as a nurse’s assistant at a local hospital, and attended classes online. Susan’s housekeeper, Clara, watched Lily for me, and refused my payment.

“You’ll pay me later,” Clara said. “When you finish school and get a nice job, pay me then.”

School, work, and Lily kept me busy, and there was still my agreement with Max. I didn’t make enough to pay for school and contribute rent, so I was still resigned to cook, clean, and wash clothes for him. Life was busy, but I stayed on top of everything. And I finally seemed to have some forward movement, some progress. My plans were coming together.

There was still a strange tension between Max and me. Ever since that moment when I was sure he was going to kiss me, something was different between us. The silence was heavier, his moods cryptic, as if something had been left unsaid. I spoke to him even less now, and he definitely never let me treat his injuries.

Where is my daughter?

I got the text in the break room at the hospital. I was halfway through my second shift, and had gotten a soda and a candy bar from the vending machine, which was a splurge from me. My break only lasted ten minutes, and I’d hoped to FaceTime Clara to talk to Lily. Instead, I’d gotten this text.

Funny how worried you are all the sudden. We’ve been gone for three weeks. How’s Ciara?

I stared down at the text I’d typed out, and deleted it without sending it.

She’s safe. We both are,
I sent.

A few seconds later, Todd responded.

Where are you?

“I’m not telling you,” I said under my breath. “I’m free from you.”

I want a divorce.

Just as I hit send, the little spinning circles appeared, letting me know Todd was typing. The circles stopped, then restarted, and stopped again. Todd never responded. I exhaled deeply, then shoved my phone in the pocket of my scrubs. If I wanted to divorce Todd, I knew I’d have to talk to him again, and probably face him in court. But right now, I had patients, and couldn’t think about that. I finished my soda and went back to work.

Later that evening, on my drive home, it started to rain. It fell softly at first, then gradually grew more intense. The rhythmic
pit pat
on the roof lulled me into a state of relaxation. I was desperate for sleep. All I could think about was getting home and falling into bed.

When I pulled up to the guesthouse, Lily parted the curtains of the front window. I heard her squeal when she saw me. Before I could make it to the front door, Lily had run out to greet me. Her bare feet splashed through the puddles.

“Lily, it’s pouring out here,” I said. She hugged me around my knees so hard I thought I’d fall over. “And why aren’t you in bed?”

“Sorry, Jenny,” Clara said, appearing on the porch. “She’s refusing bedtime.”

I took a deep sigh. I was hoping that Lily would already be in bed by the time I got back.

“Oh, sweetie,” I said. “Aren’t you tired?”

“No, I’m not tired. See?” She looked up at me, stretching her eyes wide open as if that was somehow proof she wasn’t tired. “I want to splash in the puddles with you.”

My first instinct was to try to reason with her, to get her to bed as quickly as possible so I could rest. But then it occurred me that this was my life now. I was a single mother. I’d always be tired, and I couldn’t just shove my children away when they wanted to be with me.

“All right,” I said, causing Lily to jump up and down. “Let’s go get your rain boots.”

“You sure you don’t want me to get her to bed?” Clara asked as I was pulling the boot up Lily’s leg.

“That’s okay, Clara. I’ve got it from here. You go home,” I said.

“But you must be so tired,” Clara said.

“Yes, but I’m getting used to it,” I said.

I pulled on my own boots, and Lily and I ran hand in hand out into the pouring rain. The driveway to the guest house sloped up a small hill, so there was plenty of good puddles for splashing. Lily giggled as she hopped up and down in the water, trying to see how big of a splash she could make. I forgot how tired I was as I played with Lily. Her enthusiasm was contagious.

Lily stopped jumping when we saw headlights turn in front of the guesthouse.

“It’s the alien monster,” Lily said in a hushed voice.

“Oh, no. What should we do?”

Lily put her finger to her forehead as she thought. “Let’s hide, and jump out and surprise him”

“Good idea,” I said.

We crouched behind a bush next to the driveway, and waited for Max to pull up. When he got out of the car, Lily and I jumped up, yelling, “Surprise!” Max jumped, then looked at us in total shock. I thought maybe we’d angered him for a moment, then he started laughing loudly.

“You think you can scare the alien monster?” Max said in a roaring voice. “I’ll show you what happens when you try. Come here.”

Max been down and started lightly tickling Lily’s sides. She roared with laughter and squirmed in his arms. Max, clearly caught up in the playful moment, turned to me.

“And you too,” he said.

I squealed as he gripped me around the waist and started tickling me. I tried to get away, but somehow ended up deeper in his arms. Max tightened his grip around me and tickled the top of my back, just under my shoulder blades. I was laughing so hard I could barely breathe. When he finally stopped, I looked up at him, panting. There was that look again. Rain fell all around us, but his arms were warm around me. Was this it? Was he going to kiss me?

Max suddenly loosened his grip around me. I stumbled back. He looked to Lily, then to me, and went inside of the house. Lily grabbed my hand.

“Keep jumping, Mommy,” she said.

“Okay, sweetie,” I said through a strained smile.

We kept hopping through the puddles. I couldn’t stop looking at the house, thinking about Max. What was happening between us? And for the first time I realized that maybe this was something I wanted.

When the rain stopped falling, I finally got Lily inside with promises of pancakes in the morning. I towel dried her hair, got her out of her wet clothes, and into her pajamas. After laying in her crib, she quickly drifted off to sleep. I was amped up from playing outside, and there were a few dishes in the sink, so I went to clean them instead of going to bed.

Max was sitting at the kitchen table, a closed book in front of him. He didn’t look at me when I entered the room. As I got closer, I noticed that that book was a Bible. It seemed odd that he would be a man of faith. Just how seriously did he take his religion?