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Authors: Shonna Wright

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Chapter 22

 

Kora paused on the landing to Ruby’s storage floor while Gus continued down the stairs, his voice fading as he chattered on about catacombs and Humphrey’s maps. When he finally noticed she wasn’t behind him, he puffed back up to where Kora stood transfixed, staring down the dim hall.

“Don’t you think we should go back and rest? We’ll need our energy for when we go in search of the catacomb,” he said.

“Just ten minutes,” asked Kora.  “You said we could check it out on our way back.”

“Okay. Anything to cheer you up.” Gus led her down a hall that forked in two directions and swiftly steered her to the left. A polished glass door exhaled a burst of cool, dry air and Kora wandered into a room with clean white floors and electric lights that flicked on automatically. “Ruby bought everything in here off the black market.” He pointed at a Japanese print of a woman reclining in a rocky setting that resembled a mountainous seashore. A large squid crouched between her legs, its arms wound possessively around her naked torso as its oddly human mouth devoured her sex. 

Kora wondered what Ishmael would think if he saw the painting. He was such a prude, he would probably pretend that it wasn't there.  “What was down the other hall?”

“Like I said, just Ruby’s film memorabilia: old cameras, lights, her monster models and sets. It’s pretty gnarly in there.”

Monster models.  Kora both dreaded and hungered to see them.  “That's where I want to go.”

“What about her surrealist paintings? Disturbing scenes of darkness, death, and hell?”

“We sleep in the dungeon, Gus. We’ve seen enough of hell.”

“I rather like the dungeon. It’s cozy.”

The door sealed automatically behind them. “I’m surprised how easy it is to just walk in there,” said Kora. “Seems like we could have just loaded up and left.”

“Walking in and looking is fine. It’s when you touch something that the lasers fly.”

They traced their way back to the fork, this time taking the bend to the right that curved for a hundred feet before hitting an old door that looked ready to bust its hinges. Gus and Kora both pushed an inch at a time until they could finally slip through the narrow opening. Inside, the door was blocked by a tide of junk that made even Humphrey’s shack seem tidy.

“You realize we might get trapped in here forever,” said Gus, kicking aside a stack of old boom mikes as he attempted to clear a path. “I think Ruby found a decomposing body under a bunch of crates a few years ago. Someone from the Food got in here looking for loot.”

Kora climbed a tower of boxes and surveyed the room. “What’s back there? Looks like a gigantic spider.”

“That’s where the models are but I don’t think we can make it over there.  Too dangerous.”

Gus looked desperately around. Kora knew he hard enough time maneuvering over solid, level ground but she was too caught up in her search to feel sorry for him. She scrambled over to a clear spot of cement and hiked toward the giant spider.

“I had no idea you were so interested in movie making,” said Gus, crawling after her.

They explored a forest of clothing racks, overflowing with black gowns, lingerie, and swimsuits with massive bite marks out of them.

“I’m sure Ivan would love to get his hands on some of this stuff. I’d love to see what he could do with this feathered bustier.” Gus held the garment under his head and wiggled his hips.

Kora glanced up at the ceiling where she could no longer see the hanging spider. “Do you think we’re headed in the right direction?”

“This way,” said Gus, leading her between metal shelves piled with disturbingly realistic corpses.

She paused before a disemboweled werewolf that lay on its back with its snout drawn back in a mournful howl. “There’s something familiar about this.”

Gus lifted the arms of a fake, rotting skeleton and wiggled them in the air.  “Reminds you of your youth hanging out in monster morgues?”

At the end of the shelves, a huge sea monster sprawled on the floor with a panel of controls hanging from its neck like a leash. Unable to resist, Kora picked up the panel and switched it on. A shudder went through the beast and its jaws gaped impossibly wide so she could see the machinery spinning inside like the organs of a great watch. She cranked on a lever that made the contraption roll sideways where it got stuck on a flipper. Kora pressed another button and the mouth struggled to close on teeth that were so long, they kept the jaws propped open. “This thing is ridiculous.”

Gus snatched the controls away from Kora. “Ruby used to have a mechanical squid from some old movie that was pretty sophisticated. It was hooked up to a computer and everything.”

Kora felt a tingling behind her ears as if she'd seen such a contraption in another life. “What happened to it?”

“Not sure, but Ruby still goes on about it sometimes even though it was lost a billion years ago.”  Gus dropped the controls and the beast sank back into an untroubled slumber. “Hope it was better than this thing, though I suppose all this jalopy had to do was flop around in the water a bit. Add some scary music and a bikini-clad babe twisting in its jaws and presto, crappy horror film.”

“I’m surprised Ruby's into such dumb movies.”

“Every science nerd's got their thing.  Ruby just took fandom to the next level and decided to make her own monsters.”

Kora followed Gus into a graveyard of cameras pointed at odd angles like a swarm of mad insects, trying to avoid looking into each other’s singular eyes. She could now see the spider dangling from the ceiling not too far ahead, and climbed a pile of coffins to reach the creature. It was disappointing up close. Two of the legs were broken and what Kora took for part of its thorax was actually human, male genitalia that hung down in a manner that only teenage boys could appreciate.

“I think that spider is a robot, too,” said Gus, pointing at some controls that dangled from its neck.

“I have no desire to see what that thing does when it’s switched on,” said Kora.

“Really? None?” asked Gus, picking up the controls.

Before he could flip the on switch, Kora waded toward a rave of monsters huddled together in small groups against a mountainous backdrop. She wove through the frozen crowd that seemed too absorbed in hushed conversation to notice she’d crashed their party. A zombie feasted on the back of a woman’s head as she chatted with a man whose lower half resembled a platypus. A cyclops lingered along the wall with sagging shoulders, his eye fixed on a five-headed hydra that was busy tormenting a ragged little troll that was the spitting image of Ivan.

“Kora?” called Gus from somewhere behind her. “You should come check out this spider. It’s pretty outrageous.”

“I’m over here with all the models,” she said loudly, then snuck to the back of the party.  She nearly ran into the prototype for Humphrey, his jowly face comically fierce above polished white tusks.  His bare chest, which in real life seemed doughy beneath the flannel, sported a perfect six-pack.

Kora spotted a massive hand reaching out from behind a curtain as if attempting to steal someone’s wallet. She pushed through the crowd and drew the curtain aside to reveal a perfect model of Caleb with hooded eyes that gazed out across the room like a bored child. Unlike the real Caleb, this creature's black hair was long and matted over a dusty coat with a silk boutonniere. Kora thought it strange to see him so slovenly, wearing clothes several sizes too small, instead of Ivan’s meticulously tailored suits. While circling Caleb, she nearly tripped over a woman’s Victorian boot sticking out from the other side of the curtain. She bent down, yanked on the shoe, and a body slid out topped by a gray face covered in an intricate web of scars.

“There you are. I swear you’ve been trying to avoid me,” said Gus. “Do you realize I counted at least four hunchbacks at this shindig and every one of them was beastly. And just look what we have here—Caleb.”

Kora tried to tug the curtain closed over the figure gaping up at her from the floor.

“Who is that?” said Gus, jerking back the curtain.

“No one.” Kora pretended to examine a Minotaur dressed in a furry loincloth with a Gucci purse hanging from its horns.

Gus squatted down, grabbed the model around the waist, and hauled it up to a standing position beside Caleb. “Holy shit. Take a look! It's the chick from the drawing.”

Kora turned back as if facing her executioner.

“It’s Caleb’s bride,” continued Gus. “That's why he drew a picture of her and stuffed it in his toy. Maybe it was like a keepsake.” Kora cringed as Gus brushed a hand over the heavily scarred cheeks that were smeared with rouge. “Just look at that face. This is what plastic surgery was like in the nineteen nineties. I bet if we dug up Joan Rivers, this is exactly how she’d look.”

Kora’s throat went dry as she gazed into the dark eyes. If the creature were alive, it would be impossible to tell where it was looking or what it was thinking. Like the model of Caleb, its hair was black, wiry, and the skin a deathly pallor.  She wanted to look somewhere else, block the face from her mind forever, but no matter how hard she tried, Kora couldn’t tear her eyes away.

“Her wedding dress is fantastic,” said Gus, holding up the white lace skirt stained yellow in large patches from years spent lying on the floor. “Do you mind if I cut in?” he said to the model of Caleb, then dipped the bride back before dropping her on the floor with a loud clunk. Gus burst into laughter that was cut short when he noticed Kora’s stricken face. “What’s wrong? Am I getting too saucy with the models?”

“I’m just tired. We should get back to the lab.”

“Those two look so cute together. Too bad Ruby never made Caleb's little wife. Or maybe she did, and the girl died which would explain all the drawings. Would have been sweet if she was still around, don’t you think?”

Kora walked away without answering, shoving through the crowd of models who all seemed to stare at her, their glassy eyes accusing as their arms blocked her way.

“Will you slow down! What's wrong with you?” said Gus, struggling to keep up with her.

She came to an abrupt stop and he slammed into her back.  “I'm not what you think I am.”  Her lips trembled and she wiped a hand over her dry mouth. “
I wish I could tell you, but—

“I
already know everything,” he said, putting a hand on her shoulder.

Kora turned around.
“You do?”

“Yes,” he said, his face stern. “All this time we thought you were a young, normal, attractive girl when actually you're a... harpy-doodle-emo-werelobster!”

Kora forced a smile as Gus busted up laughing. “You got it, Gus. That's exactly what I am.”

 

Chapter 23

 

Vaughn sat across from Ramon on a low couch in the corner of the main feasting tent. Every few minutes, a young woman knelt beside him and offered her wrist, but he shook his head.

“You’re not hungry tonight?” asked Ramon.

Vaughn glanced at Ramon’s plate where a large chunk of roast pork sat untouched. He felt a wave of hunger and looked away. “I don’t feel well.”

Ramon leaned back against a pile of cushions and folded his arms behind his head. “I saw that blue-haired girl everyone is talking about up in Humphrey’s shack today.  She’s cute, in a girlish way.  Didn't seem your type at all.”

“Everyone seems to know my type better than I do. Exactly who’s talking about her?”

“Max. He’s telling everyone that she’s here to turn Ruby into an immortal vampire. The old man has finally lost it. We’ve all known for a while, now, that something’s seriously wrong with him. Not that there was ever anything right with that bloodthirsty devil.” Ramon shot Vaughn a smile. “No offense.”

“None taken.” It made Vaughn uneasy that Max, of all people, knew so much about what was going on in the castle. “What he said about Kora—” Vaughn paused. He should have told Roman about all this before he heard rumors from Max.

Ramon leaned forward off his pillows. “Do I need to torture it out of you?”

“I only found out yesterday. It’s all happening too fast.”

Roman wiggled his fingers in the air.  “You’re not telling me that sweet little blue-haired girl is some kind of mad scientist?”

“She makes Ruby look like a total hack.”

“How do you know?”

“Because.” Vaughn looked around to make sure no one else was listening. “She made me.”

Ramon let out a loud whoop that turned nearly every head in the tent. “Sorry, just hit a pepper in my dinner,” he said loudly and everyone returned to their conversations. He crawled over to sit next to Vaughn. “Modest, aren’t you?”

“Let’s not talk about it here.”

“This is the only place in the whole camp where we won’t be overheard. Everyone’s too busy spreading gossip to pay any attention. Now—are you out of your mind? This girl is wrong for you on so many levels. I watched a porno a few months ago with the same plot and things went horribly—”

“Now isn’t the time to talk about your porn collection.”

“Why not? It’s the wisdom of the ages. You get all the girls so the rest of us have been forced into a monkhood where sex is all here and here.” Ramon pointed to his head and his right hand. “The sages of porn tell us that if one is a hot and horny monster, never mess with your master.”

“What Max said about Ruby is true.”

Ramon stared at Vaughn for a minute, then let out a long breath. “So we’ll have two of you bastards to feed from now on?”

“Ruby’s eating style will be different from mine.”

“I’ve seen all her favorite movies. The vampires never have your table manners.” Ramon’s eyes dropped to Iris who lay asleep on a cushion between them.

“It might be a good idea if you all hid up in the hills for a while,” said Vaughn. He was about to continue when he saw Berta plowing toward them.

Ramon waved his arms at her as if trying to spook a bird. “Go away. Vaughn and I are having a private discussion. Go hang out with your friends.”

“Those aren’t my friends,” said Berta, glancing at a group of women seated in the corner of the tent. “They’re vultures. Besides, I want to join this private conversation. Were you discussing Vaughn’s blue-haired whore?”

Vaughn met Berta’s furious gaze but remained silent.

“I don’t understand why we don’t just kill her,” continued Berta.  “She's going to marry that bastard who imprisoned us all here.”

“You sound like Max,” said Ramon. “We aren’t going to solve anything by killing.”

“And you sound like Ben,” said Berta, glaring at her brother. “We need to act.  Sitting around, spouting about peace will just get us all killed.”

“I think the blue-haired girl is more of a threat to you than anyone else,” said Ramon.

“I’m trying to do what’s best for the clan, and getting rid of Vaughn’s new girlfriend is the only way to solve the problem,” said Berta.

Vaughn felt like crushing something, he was so angry. “She isn’t my girlfriend and like everyone here, she’s a prisoner. Kora doesn’t have any choice.”

“Her name is Kora?” asked Berta in a syrupy voice. “What a pretty name. She’s quite special, isn’t she?  And very talented from what I've heard. Is she as good a fuck as I was?”

“Jesus Christ,” said Ramon, reaching down to cover Iris’s ears even though she was sound asleep.

“You’ll be glad to know she never wants to see me again,” said Vaughn. “I’m a mistake she made years ago that she doesn’t want to repeat.”

All the anger drained from Berta’s face and she stared at Vaughn in disbelief.  “She doesn’t want you?”

“Not that hard to believe,” said Ramon. “I’m beginning to really like this Kora. You’ve finally met a woman with some taste.”

Vaughn and Berta continued to stare at each other while Ramon grew impatient and lifted Iris off the pillow. “I know you two are having a moment, but it’s time we take Iris home to bed.”

Berta stood up but her eyes remained fixed on Vaughn. “Do you love her?”

Ramon tilted back his head and groaned. “Please tell me I’m not going to spend then next twenty minutes trapped in a Jane Austen novel.”

“If you do,” continued Berta, ignoring her brother, “then we’re both in love with someone who thinks we’re not good enough for them.”

“I never felt that way about you,” said Vaughn.

Berta smiled while Ramon rolled his eyes and shoved his sister toward the tent exit.

When they were both gone, Vaughn reached down and grabbed the leftover pork off Ramon’s plate. He devoured the meat as he walked back to the castle, and licked his fingers as he gazed up at the lights in his bedroom. Ruby was probably waiting for him on her favorite couch, working out the details of his latest punishment. He stepped through the French doors, surprised to see Ivan sulking in an armchair while Gus paced around the room with his arms behind his back.

“Thank God you’re finally here,” said Ivan. “Maybe you can make him shut up.”

Vaughn dropped into a chair and noticed a pile of maps spread across the coffee table, the corners held down by books. “What’s going on?”

“I was just outlining tonight’s adventure,” said Gus. He sniffed the air and looked around with raised eyebrows. “Does anyone else smell roast pork?”

“It’s coming from Vaughn,” said Ivan. “Is that your new way of dealing with your eating disorder? Rolling in food?”

For the first time, one of Ivan’s dietary jabs didn’t hit home. Vaughn calmly poured himself a cup of coffee, aware that Ivan was watching for his reaction.

“Kora and I visited Humphrey earlier today and he told us about a catacomb in the castle foundations,” said Gus.

“Did he also mention the roller rink, the animal menagerie, and the Spanish Galleon?” said Vaughn.

“This is real. We have maps and everything,” said Gus.  “I guess when Kora lived here, she worked down in the catacomb doing god knows what with some lumpy guy named Mud.”

“The same Mud that's in Caleb's tea party?” asked Ivan.

“One and the same,” said Gus. “We need to find that dude. Kora said that Humphrey said he's buried somewhere down in the catacomb.”

“Where were you when Humphrey was telling her all this?” asked Vaughn.

“Stoned out of my mind,” said Gus.  “He had these brownies—”

“I know the ones,” Vaughn interrupted.  “Berta makes them for him.”  Vaughn leaned forward to study the maps. “Is Kora coming along?”

“No, she's acting kind of jumpy. Went back to her room to rest.  Must be her time of the month or something.”

Vaughn’s heart sank. He’d hoped to see her tonight so he could casually bring up how he'd visited Joshua. He imagined the look of delight on her face.

“The first thing I want to investigate is the stairwell that Caleb once used to take dead bodies from Ruby’s lab down to the catacomb,” said Gus.

“He used to do that?” Vaughn gulped down the last of his coffee. It either tasted better now that he had a normal stomach, or Gus simply brewed a better cup than him.

“It was one of his main duties before he regressed back to preschool,” replied Gus.

“There’s no way he’ll remember how to open that passage,” said Ivan. “You’re putting too much pressure on him after the whole success with the lite-brite.”

“Maybe, but it’s still worth a try,” replied Gus. “The big guy still has a lot of stuff stored up in his noggin. It’s just a matter of finding the right way to rattle it out of there.”

 

 

Gus stood beside a wall in Ruby’s old lab and waved his arms like an elephant trainer. “Alright Caleb, do your magic.”

Everyone watched the giant who, still dressed in his pajamas, beamed his childishly charming, if gruesome smile. They waited and Caleb, sensing that something exciting was about to happen, waited with them.

“Maybe he needs a body or something to jog his memory,” said Vaughn, who sulked at the base of the iron tower, wishing he could sneak off and spy on Kora in her lab down the hall.

Gus rubbed his chin as he studied the metal bed where Ruby once strapped her doomed victims.  His eyes narrowed when they landed on Ivan. “Come here.”

“Why can’t you use Vaughn?” groaned Ivan.

“Because you look more dead than he does,” said Gus. “Hop up here and let me fasten you down.”

“Caleb piled the bodies up over against that far wall like cordwood so he could take several down at one time,” said Ivan.

“Make it happen,” replied Gus.

Ivan grudgingly lowered himself to the floor, careful not to crinkle his jacket, while Gus bounced around Caleb, shouting for him to fetch the body like a good boy.

“I told you he wouldn’t remember,” said Ivan as he climbed back to his feet and brushed off his coat sleeves. “And it’s time for him to go back to bed.”

“I guess we’ll have to move on to plan B: the air duct,” said Gus.

“And if that doesn’t work,” said Ivan, “then I suggest plan C: send Vaughn through the sewer pipe. I’ve already ruined one jacket wallowing on that disgusting floor and I’m not about to ruin another to help that blue-haired menace.”

“Go put Caleb to bed and meet us in the tunnels near the stairwell that leads up to the kitchen,” said Gus.

“I’ll try,” said Ivan, yawning as he glanced down at his Rolex, a Christmas present Ruby gave to Vaughn the previous year. “But as you know, I’m usually in bed by ten.”

Gus slammed the door to Ruby’s lab behind them.  “Where you watch soaps and smoke cigars until morning.  Tonight, Ivan, you get to stay up with the adults. You have forty minutes and then we’ll come find you.”

Gus and Vaughn disappeared through a secret panel and when they reached the stairwell, Gus hauled out his map. “It looks like we don’t go all the way up. How strange. I’ve blasted through this stairwell into the pantry a million times and never bothered to look around. Must be more to it than meets the eye.”

“When you’re heading up these stairs, I’m sure all you’re thinking about are coffee, wine, and potato chips.”

“True.”

“What’s that?” Vaughn squinted at a strange outline in the stucco.

“I can’t see anything.” Gus raised his torch. “Wait. There’s a door there. Can you get any closer?”

Vaughn stepped onto the iron railing and ran his hand along the depression. “I never noticed this before.”

“These passages are dark. Ruby should have installed motion-sensing fluorescents instead of twelve thousand gas torches. I’m sure it would have helped on the bills.”

“I think I found a door handle.”

“Can you give it a yank?”

Vaughn dug around the encrusted handle with his fingernails, but it didn’t work. “Do you have any tools I could use for digging?”

“I brought a flat screwdriver.”

“Hand it up to me.”

Vaughn took the screwdriver and stabbed at the hard stucco covering the bump and soon a large chunk flaked off revealing half an iron handle. He continued hacking away at it until he’d uncovered the whole thing, then gave it a strong pull. They both heard a loud crack and the handle snapped off.

“That’s not good,” said Gus from below.

“I did get the door open a tiny bit. Look, there’s more of an outline.”

“Dig around, maybe you can get all that loose stucco off and pry it open.” Vaughn slipped a screwdriver under the hole he’d made around the handle and pried off a huge piece of cement.

“I can see the door now; it’s made of iron.”

“Do you think you can get it open?”

Vaughn felt along the edge until he found a tiny crack and slipped in the screwdriver. He pulled as hard as he could without breaking the tool and felt the door give. “I think I got it.”

“Good, keep going.”

“It’s open.”

“Hell, this is going to be easier than I thought.  We'll be in the catacomb in no time.”

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