Tangled Dreams (30 page)

I didn’t care how I looked at that moment I was so upset and ashamed that Gavin had to see me this way. The next thing I knew we were pulling to a stop and we were parked in a different parking lot. Street lamps were shining in on me and I realized we were at the 24 hour mini mart. I could feel Gavin slide over next to me and put his arm around me.

“I’ll be right back.” He whispered in my ear taking the keys and locking me in. I just sat back and silently cried. I hate crying. It is like someone opens a flood gate and once I start I can’t stop. Gavin came back and slid next to me again with a grocery sack in his hand. Getting out a bottle of water and tissues, he started wiping my face clean gently not saying anything. Looking into his caring eyes. “I thought you left.” I said still crying.

“I would never leave you.”

“Where did you go?”

“I went outside for some air. I had no intentions on leaving you with him. And when I went back in to look for you. You were gone. I thought you went home with him. So, I went to the car and happened to look over and seen you two.”

“Thank God you were there.” I said now ashamed I couldn’t handle myself yet again.

“Madison? Did something happen in the gym with him also?”

Great just when I thought I was going to stop crying. “Yes.” I said hanging my head low. “That time I was able to knee him and get away. The second time he wouldn’t let me go”

“What happened? Did he follow you outside?”

“Yes, he wanted me to tell him that I loved him and I refused.”

“Madison, from what I could see you were fighting like a champ.” He said his eyes blazing with anger and a new respect. “Your to trusting. You have got to stop looking for the best in everyone. Sometimes it’s not there.” His anger mounting. “I’m going to go find him and this time his mom won’t recognize him.” Sliding back over in the drivers seat.

“Gavin, no. I’m sure he won’t bother me again.” I pleaded. “Please, don’t let this ruin the rest of your prom night.”

“Madison. I hate to break it to you, but prom is over.” He said leaning his head back against the head rest feeling exhausted.

“It’s not over.” I whispered sadness overwhelming me.

“Then what do you suggest?” His face unreadable.

“I’m sorry I ruined your last dance.” I whispered tears streaming down again. Sliding back over to me he gathered me up in his arms.

“You didn’t ruin anything. If I hadn’t let my temper get the best of me I would have let you talk to him, and I would have gotten you out of there. I should have never underestimated him. It’s my fault. Besides, we were having fun before that. That is what I’ll remember forever.” Kissing the top of my head.

“If you want to take me home and go to your after prom parties I’ll understand.”

“No, I would rather stay with you. Besides I can’t leave you like this.” Staring over at me.

“I’ve handled worse Gavin. I can get through this by myself.”

“Can I ask you a question?” He asked clearly annoyed by something.

“Anything.”

“Why did you want to talk to him”

“God Gavin. I didn’t want to talk to him at all. I thought it was obvious. I just said that because I didn’t want you two getting in a fight. He had nothing to lose, but you had everything. Mostly your scholarship. I couldn’t let that happen and be able to sleep at night.” I confessed.

“So, you went through all of that for me?” Asking now amazed.

“Yes, of course. I didn’t realize he was going to do that, but I would do it all over again if I had to. You do anything it takes to protect me and I would do anything it takes to protect you also. You’re my only family I’ve got Gavin.”

This of course made him happy and sad at the same time. Happy that she thought of him so highly to think of him as her only family. But, sad because he didn’t want to be just family, he wanted to be her boyfriend, her best friend, her everything. Looking up at her, “I appreciate it Maddie, but don’t ever do that again! You hear me? I don’t want you ever to be hurt trying to protect me.”

“Oh, so what’s alright for you isn’t alright for me?” I asked now a little pissed.

“Yeah, pretty much.” He said still staring at her.

I really didn’t know what else to say to that. I was expecting an argument, not for him to agree with me. “Well, okay then.” I said drying my tears looking out the window.

Chuckling, Maddie, don’t get me wrong it was very nice of you to think about my well being, but you don’t mess with guys like that. You never know what’s going to happen.”

“Dually noted.” Sighing I look horrible. I hope Julia isn’t waiting up for us.

“Well, she probably is. If you think she’s going to let the night pass without pictures your mistaken. She’ll stay up as long as it takes.”

“Great.” I said pulling out my purse reapplying makeup and trying to pin my hair back up.

“Maddie, you don’t have to worry you still look beautiful.” Reaching over with both hands pulling up both sides of my dress. I obviously had yet to notice that it had slipped down with the whole Clay thing and now the top of my bra was showing. Frankly he felt sorry for me but, it was driving him wild at the same time. He could hardly keep eye contact. Looking down to see what he was doing I blushed with embarrassment.

“There.” He said smirking.

“Now your ready.”

“Thanks Gavin.” I said still looking down. His hands were still on my side and I could feel the warmth of them, him still staring at me. Looking at him he was so close I swear I could hear both of our hearts beats. Leaning in he pressed his lips to mine and I was thrilled and terrified at the same time. I couldn’t do it. Not after my not so Uncle William saying those things. He would force us apart. I would lose him. I couldn’t handle losing another person I loved. “No.” I said pulling back.

Stunned “I’m sorry.” He said now embarrassed. “I’ll take you home.” Slipping back across the seat he started the car and drove in silence. I felt horrible and I just wanted the night to end. When we got home, it was probably around 1 am. I thought  Julia would be asleep but she was the only one up. He still hadn’t said another word to me and we quietly got our pictures taken, not saying anything to each other. He went up to his room first and I felt guilty. I felt like he should be at an after party. Every senior goes to an after party. I thanked Julia for everything she did for me. Especially buying the gorgeous dress I was wearing and excused myself up to my room. She followed me up to her own also talking about going to bed. Stopping at my door I listened for any movement inside Gavin’s room. I heard the faint murmur of his television and thought about going in, but decided I caused enough damage for one night.

Walking into my room it felt big and empty. Maybe it was just me feeling empty. Sitting down on my bed I looked over at my vanity mirror. I now looked the same as I did when I left thanking God for that because I didn’t need any questions from Julia. Sitting here thinking about the night, it felt magical and a nightmare all at the same time. Leaning back onto my pillows I didn’t even bother taking my heals off turning over I looked at the picture of Gavin and I. One of my most favorite possessions now. Closing my eyes I didn’t feel tired. But, the next thing I knew I was being transported back to that night like every other night. I was again in my old apartment being told that daddy was dead. Waking up crying uncontrollably I hated this. Every night I traveled back and every night I relieved the pain over and over again. And every night it felt like the first night I found out.

Gavin in the next room heard her like so many other nights. Usually he waited until he heard  her quiet down for a while and then he would go check on her to make sure she was alright. He hated she had to go through this every night. Turning over he was exhausted slipping down to his boxers he crawled under his blanket. Willing images of the confusing night to go away.

There was something different about this dream. I was having a hard time remembering, but this time Gavin was on his knees right beside me on the floor in the living room consoling me with his arms wrapped around me. My dream never changed. It never added any extra “characters” in it. It was merely a reenactment of previous events. I was dumbfounded even in my dreams he was helping me. I knew it was my subconscious. What if it wasn’t? What if it was dad showing my a sign? I knew I was probably over thinking it. However, either way it meant something to me and I couldn’t ignore it. Walking over to the adjoining room door, I opened it quietly. The only light came from the glow of the television he left on like he did almost every night. I gave serious thought to turning around and leaving him be. I had to do it while I had the courage.  I wasn’t sure if I would ever have the courage again. Walking over to his bed he was turned on his side sleeping quietly, looking peaceful. He was so absolutely gorgeous. I couldn’t believe my luck having him in my life. I didn’t want to push him away any more. Touching his shoulder gently he jerked awake and looked at me confused.

“Maddie, what are you doing babe? What’s wrong?” He asked his eyes adjusting to the dark.

My voice cracking, “I just wanted to see you.”

“Maddie, your still in your dress.”

“I know I don’t care.” I said breaking down.

“Come here babe. He said lifting up the blanket for me to get inside.”

“Ouch, you still have your heals on to.” He said his foot getting jabbed.

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay babe. What is wrong?”

“Nightmare.” He knew she had nightmares every night. What made this night so different?

“Can I sleep with you for a while?”

“Of course. As long as you want.” Saying careful not to touch me.

Turning myself over I put my arms around him and put my head between his shoulder and head. Gently he wrapped both arms around me.

“Maddie, what is wrong babe? I can tell it is something.”

Looking up into his eyes “I’m ready to tell you why I’ve been holding back.”

“Are you sure?” Sighing

“Yes.”

“Okay lets hear it.” Saying now hopeful.

“Promise me one thing Gavin.”

“Anything.”

“Promise me that you’ll let me get out what I want to say before you say anything. And if you decide you don’t want to say anything at all, that is fine to. But if you do, please don’t lie to me to try and make me feel better.”

“I wouldn’t Maddie. You know that.”

“I know.”

“Alright. Here it goes.” Looking into his eyes I wanted to look away just in case his eyes told me what I didn’t want to see but, I couldn’t.

“Gavin, I love you. And I don’t love you as a best friend. I love you. I think I loved you from the first moment I seen you. I’m so completely madly in love with you that you’re all I think about. You’re all I care about. And every time we fight I am so scared that I’m going to lose you forever.”

Gavin was astonished. He thought this could only happen in his dreams. He wanted to pinch himself to make sure it was real.

“The reason I have been holding back from you is because I have been so afraid.”

Looking at her now confused he didn’t dare interrupt her in fear she would stop and walk away.

“I’ve been so afraid of falling in love with you and then losing you. Losing you like I lost my father and I couldn’t stand to go through that again. If anything happened to you I would just die. Then when the whole thing happened with your father, I thought he was right. I thought I would only ruin your life like my mom did to my dad. I couldn’t do that to you. You have been my best friend and have been here for me no matter what whether I deserved it or not. A lot of times I didn’t. I love you so much that It is starting to hurt inside everyday, with every breath I take, that I’m not near you.” I said tears streaming down my face. “And I would totally understand if you didn’t feel the same way back. Looking down now.

“Are you finished Maddie?” He whispered gently staring into her eyes. He felt his heart beating double time and he was so happy at this moment.

Taking his hand and forcing me to look into his eyes.

“I love you to Maddie. I’ve always loved you . Frankly I’m shocked you couldn’t see right through me. I have loved you from the very first moment I’ve laid eyes on you. And every time I had to see you with Clay it killed me inside.”

I couldn’t hardly believe my ears it sounded like pure heaven. “You really do love me?”

“Yes Maddie, I am totally, completely in love with you and I want you more than anything else in this world.” He said now rubbing my face with his hand. This time I didn’t wait for him to kiss me. Leaning in I grabbed his face and kissed him with such a hunger and passion that he had no idea where it came from. But, he sure the hell wasn’t complaining.

Pulling away from her, “So, does this mean we’re together finally?”

Smiling and shaking my head. “Yes, that’s what this means.”

Taking her back into his arms smiling, he kissed her like he’s never kissed anyone in his life. Rolling over on top of her he pulled away to look down at her. “I love you Maddie.” Saying so sincerely that it almost made me cry…again.

“I love you to Gavin.” Pulling her up to him he was holding her weight with one arm and it amazed me as to just how strong he really was.

She was the most beautiful girl he had ever laid eyes on with the most beautiful body he had ever seen. Still in her dress she was absolutely gorgeous. Pulling away from her he set her gently back on his pillows. Crawling down to her feet he placed her foot up on his shoulder and started unlacing one of her shoes staring into her eyes the entire time, then unlacing the other. When he was finished he kissed her foot and tossed the shoes over on the couch careful to not make any noise. Crawling his way back up her body I could see his muscles in his arms flexing and it was so sexy. Taking my lips back onto his mouth he kissed me blind again. I could feel my body growing hotter, this time I didn’t want to stop. Rolling over on top of him I could feel him unzip the back of my dress and I didn’t care. I wanted more. Kissing him I worked my way down to his neck trying to do anything I could possibly do to let him know that I didn’t want to stop. But, like the gentlemen he is he stopped while I was kissing him now on his chest.

“Maddie we better stop now. I can’t go on like this much longer.” He whispered in pain.

Finding his lips again. “Please don’t stop Gavin. I want you to show me how much you love me.”

His restraint snapping, he rolled her on to her back taking total control of the situation. Kissing her neck he slowly worked his way down to her cleavage working her dress down slowly. When he did he couldn’t believe his eyes she had a red corset on with straps that connected to her black pantie hose with red matching panties on. He thought he just died and gone to heaven.

“Your so beautiful Maddie.” Kissing me again. Kissing down to my leg he unsnapped the straps and slowly peeled my pantie hose away. Next he gently lifted me and undid the back of my corset. Tossing it to the side he’d never seen anything so gorgeous in his life. Diving in to her breasts he was kissing her all over when he started to feel her shake.

“You alright babe?” He asked stopping, concerned now.

“I’m fine. Please don’t stop.” I could feel him removing his boxers and excitement tore through my body. Finally, he went to my underwear and peeled them off and kneeled on top of me just staring down at me. I couldn’t believe my eyes either I didn’t know all that was under those clothes. He was absolutely gorgeous. His tan skin laying over top of his muscles. I never wanted to let him go. Laying on top of me he found my lips again and I could feel his hardness pressing up against me. Wrapping my legs around him I wanted him more than anything right now. When finally he gently pushed himself inside me. I felt a searing pain at first which gave a way to pure bliss. He slowly made love to me taking care not to hurt me. I never imagined it being this way. I knew this was the guy I was going to love forever. When we were to tired to take anymore we fell asleep in each others arms. I was so blissfully happy when I drifted off.

Around 5 am he woke up to the beautiful sight of her in his arms and he was afraid it was all a dream. But, the proof was laying here next to him. He knew he had to wake her up soon. They couldn’t get caught, especially like this. Giving her kisses all over her face. “Maddie. Wake up baby.”

Opening up my eyes I was so blissfully happy. I couldn’t remember ever being this happy.

“Hi Maddie.” Almost afraid she would regret last night.

“Hi Gavin.” I said smiling stretching my arms out. “Why are you looking at me like that?” I questioned. “Oh. I know that look. No, I don’t regret it. I love you.” I said smiling at him giving him a kiss.

“I love you to. Maddie?”

“Yes Gavin?”

“Will you marry me?” Asking in all seriousness.

“Gavin, we’re to young. We can’t get married.”

“I don’t mean tomorrow. I mean I want to be with you forever and I want to keep that promise until the day we get married.”

Kissing me gently on my lips. We weren’t really to young. Him almost eighteen, me being not to far behind. Looking at him I couldn’t hardly believe this was happening. His hair was a tousled mess. He had a tiny bit of stubble, his skin still dark from the summer tan. His eyes bright and absolutely handsome in every sort of way. I had never felt happier my whole life. I knew it might be naive but how could I refuse. “Yes, Gavin. I will most defiantly marry you.”

Laughing he grabbed me up into his arms and rolled me on top of him kissing me wildly. “Your dad is going to do everything in his power to make sure that doesn’t happen.

“I don’t care. I’ll be eighteen in a month and you will be eighteen in no time. There isn’t anything he can do after that. I’m on scholarship. He doesn’t even pay for school. He can’t control me in any way.”

“Yeah, but he can me. I don’t have any where to go. I can’t leave school. And speaking of school, you’ll be leaving. How am I going to get along without you?”

“I have to be honest. I hate not being here to keep an eye on you. You are such a trouble magnet.” Saying now sad. Suddenly we heard what sounded like someone wrestling around down on the second floor. “Hurry you have to get back to your room.” He said grabbing my clothes slumped on the edge of the bed and handing them to me. Running naked to my shoes I grabbed them and came in for a quick kiss. “You look so hot naked in the daylight.” He said with a sexy smirk on his face. I laughed and whispered “love you” on the way out of his room. I dropped my clothes and dove under the covers just in time for my door to crack open. I acted like I was asleep of course. Hearing my door shut I heard Gavin’s door open up next and I heard Aunt Julia talking to him about how they were going shopping and out to lunch and asked if he wanted to come. He declined. I heard his door shut and she walked down the stairs. I laid here until I could hear everyone get up and finally the door close and the car start up. Sighing I felt like I was In heaven but I really needed a shower. Grabbing my robe, I left to go downstairs to the shower. I had to get my make up off and all the hairspray out of my hair. Stepping in the shower the water felt so good hitting my skin and I turned it up as hot as it would go. I stood here and dreamed of Gavin. Suddenly I heard the shower curtain open up and he was standing behind me.

“You need company?” Asking putting his arms around me.

“Gavin!!”

“Relax. Everyone is gone.” Kissing the back of my shoulder. Taking the soap and massaging my back with it.

“This feels so surreal Gavin.”

“I know. I didn’t think we would ever be here. I didn’t think you would ever want me.” He said lathering my body turning me around so he could do the front.

“I’ve always wanted you. It was just everything else stood in my way. And to be honest we still have the same things standing in our way. How are we going to hide this from William? Plus, I don’t want to hide this at school. However, if we don’t William is sure to find out sooner or later.”

“I don’t think we have as much to worry about as you think. He’ll be pissed off at me of course and probably ground me. Forbid me to see you. But, were missing one fact.”

“And what is that?”

“Mom. She loves you and me. She’ll go to bat for us. She already knows I love you and supports me on it.”

“What? How does she know that?”

“She’s known for quite sometime. She’s my mom. She can see right through me.”

“Oh, I see.” I said smiling loving the feel of the water hitting both our bodies intertwined.

“Well, I hope your right. I can’t be without you any more.” I said kissing him on his neck.

“You better stop or your going to get yourself in trouble.” He said walking me back up against the shower wall. “How did I get so lucky?” He asked looking at her gorgeous body water hitting both of them.