Teacher: The Final Act (A Hollywood Rock n' Romance Trilogy #3) (11 page)

At that I stilled him with my hands on his face. “Baby!  I’m not going to leave you, okay?  We’re okay.  I love you. We just have to get through this.”  

He pressed his forehead to mine and moved more insistently within me.  ”I fucking love you, Jesse,” he cried and then groaned when he came.  I held him close to me, wishing I never had to let him go.

We stayed like that for a long time, and when it was time to go to sleep, Danny carried me to bed.  He acted really cute, but I knew he was worried.  I didn’t want him to be worried.  Then I would worry and we certainly didn’t need that.

Danny took Jane to school the next morning. He and Brooke were planning to take Jane to the ranch after school and then grab dinner.  Danny asked me to call Ivana and ask about Jane spending the weekend with Sasha.  Ivana suggested we meet for lunch and I agreed, thinking it would be a welcome change from the drama at home.  

Ivana and I had had lunch a couple of times and even gone to the movies once without the girls.  It was nice to be able to talk dance with someone who could relate.  She was completely understanding about the current situation, even though I didn’t tell her about Brooke’s issues, and was happy to have Jane for the weekend.  I arranged for her to take Jane home with them Friday and bring her to school on Monday.  

That left me with the proposition of having a weekend alone at the house with Brooke.  Ugh.  

I texted Cosmo to see what he and the boys were up to Saturday night, figuring I could escape over there for a little while.  He hit me back

Jinx’s birthday bash, baby.  You should come.

Even better.  Thursday night I helped Danny pack, giddy to be seeing his performance wardrobe.  Brooke and Jane watched movies in the theater, giving us a few minutes alone.

“I wish I could pack you in my suitcase, honey,” Danny said as he closed up his bag.  

I had to admit, he was much more efficient and neat than I ever was when I packed.  Then again, he had more practice.  

“I do, too.  Except I have a date Saturday night.  Damn. Sorry, babe.  You’ll have to go without me.”  

He tackled me on the bed and attacked my neck.  ”A fucking date?  It better not be a hot date.”  

I moaned as his hands got busy.  Then I smacked him. “Danny!  We can’t!  I have to go to the lady doctor tomorrow, remember?  No funny business!”  

He frowned.  ”Really?  You can’t?”  

I shook my head.  ”Nope.  It’s prohibited.”  

He lifted up my shirt and pressed kisses into my belly, making it very difficult to deny him. “Damn.  But honey, you’re not going to do anything, right?  Just get checked?  Because I’ve been thinking a lot about us and our future.  I think there might be room for one more little red haired Danny?  Maybe?”  

I smiled down at him and shook my head.  ”You and that damn gimme smile.  Let me see what the doctor says, okay?  I want to give you everything you want, baby.  I’m just…”  

He pushed up to kiss me and ran his hands over my hair.  ”No pressure.  I told you how I feel.  I just had a dream the other night. You had this sexy pregnant belly and damn, I woke up so hard for you.”  

I rolled my eyes.  He was so crass, but he was so mine.  ”You say the sweetest things.  I love you, baby.  I’m sorry we can’t make love.”  

He crawled up next to me and unfastened his pants with a smirk.  ”You got a dentist appointment?”  

I was sad to say goodbye to Danny Friday morning.  This was the first of many times he was going to be gone. I hoped I could stand it.  We hadn’t been apart much since I started working with him six months prior.  Six months!  Crazy!  I couldn’t decide if that was a long time or a short time for all the insanity and happiness we’d experienced.  I looked down at the gorgeous ring on my finger and smiled.  I hoped we had many more good times to come.

I went to my doctor’s appointment in the afternoon and luckily she was on time.  Waiting at the OB-GYN is the worst kind of torture. Luckily, I really liked my doctor.  She was young and blunt.  

“Bottom line, Jesse, is do you want to have kids or not?  According to research I’ve read, folks with RA actually tend to have a decrease in their symptoms while pregnant and it’s not always passed along to your children.  Now that you’ve gained weight, I think you’d be fine.  You may have to adjust your meds, but I’d okay it if you wanted to.”  

My expression made her laugh.  

“Was that not what you wanted to hear?”  

I shook my head, waiting for the oxygen to get back into my lungs.  ”I’m just surprised.  I hadn’t ever thought I would find someone to marry, much less have kids with.  We just got engaged and now babies?  I might have a heart attack!”

Dr. Lewis chuckled.  ”No hurry. You’ve got plenty of time. You’re still a baby and he’s not over the hill or anything, is he?”  I told her he was just thirty-six.  She shrugged.  ”Why not?  With your dancing ability and his singing talent?  Your kid might be a true triple threat!”  

She gave me a clean bill of health and told me to come back and see her if and when I was ready to get knocked up.

I left the office feeling a little light-headed from lack of food and too much to think about.  Danny texted me that they’d landed and were settling in at the hotel.  He had the Tonight Show taping and two interviews to do in the evening.  Saturday morning more interviews and a photo shoot for Rolling Stone were scheduled, and then they were going to be on Saturday Night Live as the musical guests.  Sunday the band would be doing a live performance on satellite radio along with an interview.  I was going to be sure I was in front of the radio to listen.   I couldn’t believe this was their life!  Patricia was travelling with them and promised to keep me posted with pictures and videos.  

When I got back to the house, Brooke was outside by the pool sleeping.  I opened the slider and stepped out.  Legs barked from her pen. I shushed her, but Brooke sat up.

“Oh.  Hi Jesse.  I wasn’t sure if I should let the dog out or not.”  Legs ran over to her patch of grass to pee and then wandered around the small lawn area.  I went and sat in the chair next to Brooke’s.  

“Are you hungry? I can heat up some dinner for us.”  

She waved her hand lazily.  ”You don’t have to take care of me, Jesse.  I don’t want to put you out.”  

I shrugged.  ”I was going to eat something myself.  It’s no big deal.”  

She rolled over and looked at me.  Really looked at me.  ”I didn’t mean to cause trouble for you. I know it’s awkward.  I didn’t have any place else to go.”  Her blue eyes, so much like Jane’s, filled with tears. I felt terrible.  No matter what she’d done in the past, she was hurting.

“I understand.  I just hope this program is helpful for you.  Have you ever had to go before?”  Awkward was me trying to talk to my fiancé’s ex-wife about her drug use!

She shook her head.  ”No. And I haven’t had anything since I’ve been here, I swear.  I just need some time to, I don’t know... I’m a mess, Jesse.  I thought going back to acting would help, you know?  Get back to work?  But I haven’t done television before and the shooting schedule was intense.  I was up nights and days in a row, working eighteen-plus hours.  It was crazy! I saw a doctor there who prescribed me ‘stimulants.’” She laughed humorlessly.  ”Right.  Just call it what it is. I was taking meth for Christ’s sake.  Then I just got so tired, and then we went on hiatus… And Oliver,” she rolled her eyes.  ”I don’t know what the hell I was thinking.  He’s such a douche!” I laughed at her language, not expecting her to talk like that.  

“I’m serious,” she continued.  ”I couldn’t be around him and his douchey friends any longer!  I’ve used douches that were less douchey than him!”  At that I cracked up. I couldn’t help it.

“Douchey sounds terrible.  And gross.  And quite vivid.  Listen, how about we go eat something. Then you can tell me more about Oliver.  Or not.  Or…”

She smiled at me.  ”Thanks, Jesse.  For not making this weird.  I’m sorry I was such a bitch.  Last night, before.  I just…Yeah.”  

I wasn’t quite sure what to say so I just smiled.  ”It’s okay.  I’m not always Ms. Personality.”  

She just sighed and nodded, like she was coming to terms with something. “I’m glad Danny’s marrying you.  You’re good for him, you really are.  And I thank you, you know, for being there for Jane when I couldn’t.  I guess I’m not cut out to be the mom of a teenager.”  

I stood up and she followed me into the house.  I got out two servings of dinner. I chose the pasta with tomato cream sauce stuff that Nora made because it was my favorite. I heated hers, then mine.  She sat at the counter and I stood facing her, eating my food.

“Brooke, can I ask you a question?”  

She shrugged.  ”I don’t see why not, since I seem to be in a sharing mood.”  

I snickered, not sure if that was a go ahead or her cautioning me to watch what I said.  ”I was just curious, why would you say you’re not cut out to be the mom of a teenager?  I mean, I know they’re difficult, but what changed for you?”

She pondered my question while chewing her food.  I could sometimes see glimpses of the movie star in her, like now, when she made eating pasta look like an Academy Award winning performance of high drama.  When she finally spoke, I had to shake myself out of the little trance.

“I guess it was when I realized she didn’t think I was perfect anymore.  I don’t know.  Jane is the greatest kid, you know?  I didn’t have to even try to make her love me. She just thought I was the best mom ever.  Then, when we started to fight, I realized I couldn’t keep up the charade anymore, that anything I did was going to tarnish her image of me.  I don’t know.  I guess I was just tired.  I never had to do anything and all of a sudden I’m failing at the whole motherhood gig because I don’t want to hang out with her and her moodiness.  I don’t know.  I know it sounds awful.  I just think some women aren’t cut out to be mothers.  I never had a burning desire to be one.  Danny wanted kids, so I went along with it since he didn’t ask me for much.  But I didn’t get the fulfillment from it I thought I would.  I love her. Don’t get me wrong.  She’s amazing.  She’s kind of too good for me.”

What a sad, sad woman! The fact that she said the last part was the only thing that saved her in my mind.  She was right.  She may have given birth to Jane, and probably wasn’t the world’s worst mother, but Danny definitely got the credit in my mind for making Jane the caring, wonderful person she was growing up to be. I was grateful she was in my life.  Screw Brooke if she didn’t want to be her mother.  I’d be proud to be step-mother to such a sweet girl.

“I guess I understand,” I finally said, thinking my expression likely gave my thoughts away.  

She shrugged again and pushed back from the counter.  ”Thanks for dinner.  I’m going a little stir crazy in this place.  I think I might go out for a while.  Would you mind dropping me off at my mother’s?”  

I didn’t think she was supposed to be going out, but I wasn’t her keeper.

“Sure, I guess.  I thought you didn’t want her to know you were here?”  

She rolled her head around on her neck and stretched her back. “I talked to her earlier and filled her in.  She’s just glad I’m taking care of things.”  

I blew out a breath and then said, “Okay.  I’ll just go grab my keys.”  

I texted Danny to let him know what was going on, but he never got back to me.  I knew he was busy.  I had a bad feeling about this, but if I didn’t take her, she could always call a cab, and then who knows who would see her?  Or where she’d really go?  

It turned out her mother lived in Beverly Hills, not too far from where she used to live with Jane.  She didn’t say much, just fidgeted a lot.  She and I were about the same size, but she was shorter than me by about two inches.  And had larger breasts, by a lot, even with my new cup size.  

I pulled up to a large ranch house just as the last light left the sky and stopped the car.  

Brooke looked off in the distance.  ”Thanks, Jesse,” she said in a quiet voice.  

It reminded me of the tone she had when I called her from the hospital months ago to tell her Jane had had an accident at the horse ranch… And that she was cutting herself.  I didn’t know this woman very well, didn’t really want to, but I wanted her to get her shit together and be a mother to her daughter.  I didn’t want Jane to have to pay for Brooke’s bad decisions.

“Are you coming back to the house?” I asked her.  

She nodded slowly.  ”Yeah.  Tomorrow sometime, or whenever I get sick of my mother.  Don’t worry.  If you aren’t there, I’ve got a key.”  She climbed out and moved slowly toward the front door.  

The way she carried herself made me think of Jane and how she looked the day we went to pick her up in New York.  Part of me felt sorry for Brooke, like maybe her mother was no picnic either.  But that was a small part.  The rest of me was just short of disgusted.

I stopped and picked up some food and toys for Legs and was looking forward to a long cuddle session with her tonight.  If Danny and Jane were off without me, Legs and I were going to have a sleepover!

Saturday was the first lazy day I’d had in forever.  Legs and I slept in, went for a walk late in the afternoon at Griffith Park up by the observatory. Then we picked up a hot dog at Pink’s for an early dinner.  It was a great day and I was really looking forward to my evening with the boys.  I thought I’d bring Legs with me so they could see how big she was getting!  She was already over eighty pounds and growing bigger every day!

I pulled up to my old apartment complex close to seven and shook my head.  It was still as shitty as ever. Strangely, I missed it sometimes.  Danny’s place was fantastic, but this place had so much life to it.  Too much at times.  I looked in the back seat at Legs and shook my head.  ”Don’t worry, girl.  We’re just visiting!”  I also figured I could use her as my excuse if things got too crazy. I could say I needed to take her home.  

The party was already in full swing.  Johnny handed out drinks and Sam manned the grill.  

“Hey!  Jesse’s here!”  

I hugged Jinx and wished him a happy birthday, handing him a card.  His jaw dropped when he saw my hand.