The Absentee (27 page)

'Write to my lord about such a trifle—trouble him about such nonsense!'

'I'd be sorry to trouble him. Then take it on my word, and believe me,
sir; for I would not tell a lie, nor cheat rich or poor, if in my power,
for the whole estate, nor the whole world: for there's an eye above.'

'Cant! nonsense!—Take those leases off the table; I never will sign
them. Walk off; ye canting hag; it's an imposition—I will never sign
them.'

'You WILL then, sir,' cried Brian, growing red with indignation; 'for
the law shall make you, so it shall; and you'd as good have been civil
to my mother, whatever you did—for I'll stand by her while I've life;
and I know she has right, and shall have law. I saw the memorandum
written before ever it went into your hands, sir, whatever became of it
after; and will swear to it, too.'

'Swear away, my good friend; much your swearing will avail in your own
case in a court of justice,' continued old Nick.

'And against a gentleman of my brother's established character and
property,' said St. Dennis. 'What's your mother's character against a
gentleman's like his?'

'Character! take care how you go to that, anyway, sir,' cried Brian.

Grace put her hand before his mouth, to stop him. 'Grace, dear, I must
speak, if I die for it; sure it's for my mother,' said the young man,
struggling forward, while his mother held him back; 'I must speak.'

'Oh, he's ruin'd, I see it,' said Grace, putting her hand before her
eyes, 'and he won't mind me.'

'Go on, let him go on, pray, young woman,' said Mr. Garraghty, pale with
anger and fear, his lips quivering; 'I shall be happy to take down his
words.'

'Write them; and may all the world read it, and welcome!' His mother and
wife stopped his mouth by force.

'Write you, Dennis,' said Mr. Garraghty, giving the pen to his brother;
for his hand shook so he could not form a letter. 'Write the very words,
and at the top' (pointing) after warning, WITH MALICE PREPENSE.'

'Write, then—mother, Grace—let me,' cried Brian, speaking in a
smothered voice, as their hands were over his mouth. 'Write then, that,
if you'd either of you a character like my mother, you might defy the
world; and your word would be as good as your oath.'

'OATH! mind that, Dennis,' said Mr. Garraghty.

'Oh, sir! sir! won't you stop him?' cried Grace, turning suddenly to
Lord Colambre.

'Oh dear, dear, if you haven't lost your feeling for us,' cried the
widow.

'Let him speak,' said Lord Colambre, in a tone of authority; 'let the
voice of truth be heard.'

'TRUTH!' cried St. Dennis, and dropped the pen.

'And who the devil are you, sir?' said old Nick.

'Lord Colambre, I protest!' exclaimed a female voice; and Mrs. Raffarty
at this instant appeared at the open door.

'Lord Colambre!' repeated all present, in different tones.

'My lord, I beg pardon;' continued Mrs. Raffarty, advancing as if
her legs were tied; 'had I known you was down here, I would not have
presumed. I'd better retire; for I see you're busy.'

'You'd best; for you're mad, sister,' said St. Dennis, pushing her back;
'and we are busy; go to your room, and keep quiet, if you can.'

'First, madam,' said Lord Colambre, going between her and the door, 'let
me beg that you will consider yourself as at home in this house, whilst
any circumstances make it desirable to you. The hospitality you showed
me you cannot think that I now forget.'

'Oh, my lord, you're too good—how few—too kind—kinder than my own,'
and bursting into tears, she escaped out of the room.

Lord Colambre returned to the party round the table, who were in various
attitudes of astonishment, and with faces of fear, horror, hope, joy,
doubt.

'Distress,' continued his lordship, 'however incurred, if not by vice,
will always find a refuge in this house. I speak in my father's name,
for I know I speak his sentiments. But never more shall vice,' said
he, darting such a look at the brother agents as they felt to the
backbone—'never more shall vice, shall fraud enter here.'

He paused, and there was a momentary silence.

'There spoke the true thing! and the RAEL gentleman; my own heart's
satisfied,' said Brian, folding his arms, and standing erect.

'Then so is mine,' said Grace, taking breath, with a deep sigh.

The widow advancing, put on her spectacles, and, looking up close at
Lord Colambre's face—'Then it's a wonder I didn't know the family
likeness.'

Lord Colambre now recollecting that he still wore the old greatcoat,
threw it off.

'Oh, bless him! Then now I'd know him anywhere. I'm willing to die now,
for we'll all be happy.'

'My lord, since it is so—my lord, may I ask you,' said Mr. Garraghty,
now sufficiently recovered to be able to articulate, but scarcely to
express his ideas; 'if what your lordship hinted just now—'

'I hinted nothing, sir; I spoke plainly.'

'I beg pardon, my lord,' said old Nick;—'respecting vice, was levelled
at me; because, if it was, my lord,' trying to stand erect; 'let me tell
your lordship, if I could think it was—'

'If it did not hit you, sir, no matter at whom it was levelled.'

'And let me ask, my lord, if I may presume, whether, in what you
suggested by the word fraud, your lordship had any particular meaning?'
said St. Dennis.

'A very particular meaning, sir,—feel in your pocket for the key of
this widow's house, and deliver it to her.'

'Oh, if that's all the meaning, with all the pleasure in life. I never
meant to detain it longer than till the leases were signed,' said St.
Dennis.

'And I'm ready to sign the leases this minute,' said the brother.

'Do it, sir, this minute; I have read them; I will be answerable to my
father.'

'Oh, as to that, my lord, I have power to sign for your father.' He
signed the leases; they were duly witnessed by Lord Colambre.

'I deliver this as my act and deed,' said Mr. Garraghty;—'My lord,'
continued he, 'you see, at the first word from you; and had I known
sooner the interest you took in the family, there would have been no
difficulty; for I'd make it a principle to oblige you, my lord.'

'Oblige me!' said Lord Colambre, with disdain.

'But when gentlemen and noblemen travel INCOGNITO, and lodge in cabins,'
added St. Dennis, with a satanic smile, glancing his eye on Grace, 'they
have good reasons, no doubt.'

'Do not judge my heart by your own, sir,' said Lord Colambre, coolly;
'no two things in nature can, I trust, be more different. My purpose in
travelling INCOGNITO has been fully answered: I was determined to
see and judge how my father's estates were managed; and I have seen,
compared, and judged. I have seen the difference between the Clonbrony
and the Colambre property; and I shall represent what I have seen to my
father.'

'As to that, my lord, if we are to come to that but I trust your
lordship will suffer me to explain these matters.—Go about your
business, my good friends; you have all you want;—and, my lord, after
dinner, when you are cool, I hope I shall be able to make you sensible
that things have been represented to your lordship in a mistaken light;
and I flatter myself I shall convince you I have not only always acted
the part of a friend to the family, but am particularly willing to
conciliate your lordship's goodwill,' said he, sweeping the rouleaus of
gold into a bag; 'any accommodation in my power, at any time.'

'I want no accommodation, sir,—were I starving, I would accept of
none from you. Never can you conciliate my goodwill; for you can never
deserve it.'

'If that be the case, my lord, I must conduct myself accordingly; but
it's fair to warn you, before you make any representation to my Lord
Clonbrony, that if he should think of changing his agent, there are
accounts to be settled between us—that may be a consideration.'

'No, sir; no consideration—my father never shall be the slave of such a
paltry consideration.'

'Oh, very well, my lord; you know best. If you choose to make an
assumpsit, I'm sure I shall not object to the security. Your lordship
will be of age soon, I know—I'm sure I'm satisfied—but,' added he
with a malicious smile, 'I rather apprehend you don't know what you
undertake; I only premise that the balance of accounts between us is not
what can properly be called a paltry consideration.'

'On that point, perhaps, sir, you and I may differ.'

'Very well, my lord, you will follow your own principles, if it suits
your convenience.'

'Whether it does or not, sir, I shall abide by my principles.'

'Dennis! the letters to the post.—When do you go to England, my lord?'

'Immediately, sir,' said Lord Colambre; his lordship saw new leases from
his father to Mr. Dennis Garraghty, lying on the table, unsigned.

'Immediately!' repeated Messrs. Nicholas and Dennis, with an air
of dismay. Nicholas got up, looked out of the window, and whispered
something to his brother, who instantly left the room.

'Lord Colambre saw the post-chaise at the door, which had brought Mrs.
Raffarty to the castle, and Larry standing beside it; his lordship
instantly threw up the sash, and holding between his finger and thumb a
six-shilling piece, cried, 'Larry, my friend, let me have the horses!'

'You shall have 'em—your honour,' said Larry. Mr. Dennis Garraghty
appeared below, speaking in a magisterial tone. 'Larry, my brother must
have the horses.'

'He can't, PLASE your honour—they're engaged.'

Half a crown! a crown!—half a guinea!' said Mr. Dennis Garraghty,
raising his voice, as he increased his proffered bribe. To each offer
Larry replied, 'You can't, PLASE your honour, they're engaged;'—and,
looking up to the window at Lord Colambre, he said, 'as soon as they
have eaten their oats, you shall have 'em.'

No other horses were to be had. The agent was in consternation. Lord
Colambre ordered that Larry should have some dinner, and whilst the
postillion was eating, and the horses finishing their oats, his
lordship wrote the following letter to his father, which, to prevent all
possibility of accident, he determined to put, with his own hand, into
the post-office at Clonbrony, as he passed through the town.

MY DEAR FATHER, I hope to be with you in a few days. Lest anything
should detain me on the road, I write this, to make an earnest request
to you, that you will not sign any papers, or transact any farther
business with Messrs. Nicholas or Dennis Garraghty, before you see your
affectionate son, COLAMBRE.

The horses came out. Larry sent word he was ready, and Lord Colambre,
having first eaten a slice of his own venison, ran down to the carriage,
followed by the thanks and blessings of the widow, her son, and
daughter, who could hardly make their way after him to the chaise-door,
so great was the crowd which had gathered on the report of his
lordship's arrival. 'Long life to your honour! Long life to your
lordship!' echoed on all sides. 'Just come, and going, are you?'

'Good-bye to you all, good people!'

'Then GOOD-BYE is the only word we wouldn't wish to hear from your
honour.'

'For the sake both of landlord and tenant, I must leave you now, my good
friends; but I hope to return to you at some future time.'

'God bless you! and speed ye! and a safe journey to your honour!—and a
happy return to us, and soon!' cried a multitude of voices.

Lord Colambre stopped at the chaise-door and beckoned to the widow
O'Neill, before whom others had pressed. An opening was made for her
instantly.

There! that was the very way his father stood with his feet on the
steps. And Miss Nugent was IN IT.'

Lord Colambre forgot what he was going to say—with some difficulty
recollected.

'This pocket-book,' said he, 'which your son restored to me—I intend
it for your daughter—don't keep it, as your son kept it for me, without
opening it. Let what is within-side,' added he, as he got into the
carriage, 'replace the cloak and gown, and let all things necessary
for a bride be bought; "for the bride that has all things to borrow has
surely mickle to do."—Shut the door, and drive on.'

'Blessings be WID you,' cried the widow, 'and God give you grace!'

Larry drove off at full gallop, and kept on at a good rate, till he got
out of the great gate, and beyond the sight of the crowd; then, pulling
up, he turned to Lord Colambre—'PLASE your honour, I did not know nor
guess ye was my lord, when I let you have the horses; did not know who
you was from Adam, I'll take my affidavit.'

'There's no occasion,' said Lord Colambre; 'I hope you don't repent
letting me have the horses, now you do know who I am?'

'Oh! not at all, sure; I'm as glad as the best horse I ever crossed,
that your honour is my lord—but I was only telling your honour, that
you might not be looking upon me as a TIME-SERVER.'

'I do not look upon you as a TIME-SERVER, Larry; but keep on, that time
may serve me.'

In two words, he explained his cause of haste; and no sooner explained
than understood. Larry thundered away through the town of Clonbrony,
bending over his horses, plying the whip, and lending his very soul at
every lash. With much difficulty, Lord Colambre stopped him at the end
of the town, at the post-office. The post was gone out-gone a quarter of
an hour.

'Maybe we'll overtake the mail,' said Larry; and, as he spoke, he slid
down from his seat, and darted into the public-house, reappearing, in a
few moments, with a copper of ale and a horn in his hand; he and another
man held open the horses' mouths, and poured the ale through the horn
down their throats. 'Now, they'll go with spirit!'

And, with the hope of overtaking the mail, Larry made them go 'for
life or death,' as he said; but in vain! At the next stage, at his own
inn-door, Larry roared for fresh horses till he got them, harnessed them
with his own hands, holding the six-shilling piece, which Lord Colambre
had given him, in his mouth, all the while; for he could not take time
to put it into his pocket.