The Baby Bargain (24 page)

Kelly an annoyed glance as she dragged two whining children toward the doors.

Kelly stared at the grubby old man. It was as if seeing someone from another lifetime. Her steps slow, she walked forward, unsurprised when he moved to intercept her. She stopped a few feet away, letting him approach her.

Hadn't he been taller? More imposing? Surely he hadn't always been so thin and ragged—pathetic, really. He was just a scrawny old man, in need of a bath and a haircut. He'd loomed larger than life in her nightmares. Dominating everything around him, nearly invincible. He wasn't anything like the enormous giant of a man he'd become in her imagination.

"Hello." She felt almost light-headed with the realization that she didn't fear him anymore. She didn't have to cower in terror just because he was near.

"Your shame is plain for all to see," he said by way of greeting. Even his voice didn't seem quite as imposing as she remembered. It seemed lighter, less threatening. Not the voice of authority anymore, merely the voice of a sick old man.

"I don't happen to consider it a shame," Kelly said calmly, one hand touching her stomach.

"You're far gone in sin. I saw you with him, bold as day."

"I don't believe I wish to speak to you," she said.

"You'll listen or your soul will be doomed to eternal damnation," he boomed, causing a couple leaving the store to turn and look at him.

"No," Kelly said, her tone so confident that he seemed startled. "You're not God's mouthpiece. You're nothing but a lonely old man. You've destroyed your family and now you're left with nothing." She paused, feeling as if she were shedding a burden she'd carried all her life.

"You are nothing."

The flat statement had the impact of a blow. Her father actually backed a step, his face paling beneath the ragged growth of his beard. Then his skin reddened alarmingly and he took a step toward her, one hand raised.

"You're a whore, displaying your shame for all to see, feeling no shame for what you've done. You'll pay for your sins. You and the bastard you carry."

Kelly was peripherally aware that her father's booming accusations had drawn attention to their confrontation, but she didn't turn away from him. Meeting his eyes head on, she refused to quail in the face of his rage. If she backed away from him now, she'd spend the rest of her life regretting it.

Her silent defiance seemed to drive his rage to new heights. He was actually trembling from his anger. For a moment, Kelly thought he was going to strike her, despite the onlookers. A part of her shook with terror, but she refused to let him see her fear.

What he might have done she would never know. The manager of the store, called perhaps by a nervous customer, pushed his way through the doors. A short but burly man in his sixties, he'd spent time in Korea and still walked with a military bearing. He took in the confrontation between the young pregnant woman and the filthy old man in a glance. His chin thrust out.

"Here, now. What seems to be the problem, ma'am?"

Kelly waited a beat before turning to answer him, making it clear that she wasn't looking away out of fear.

"There's no problem, Mr. Johnson."

"Do you know this man?"

She glanced back at the man who'd spent so many years trying to destroy her spirit and shook her head.

"No," she said clearly. "He's no one."

She walked away without another glance, entering the cool store with her spine straight. She did her shopping in a daze, hardly aware of what she was buying. By the time she'd paid for her purchases and gotten them to the car, reaction was beginning to set in. She drove home automatically and carried the two sacks of groceries up to the apartment.

She'd confronted her father. Kelly collapsed onto one of the dining room chairs as the thought hit her. She'd looked him right in the eye and she hadn't backed down. Her heart was still beating a little too quickly. Her skin felt warm. Now that it was over she felt dizzy and slightly sick. Putting her head down on the table, she took deep, slow breaths, willing her pulse to steady.

And that was how Dan saw her when he opened the door.

"Kelly!" He reached her in two strides, his heart pounding. "What's wrong?"

She lifted her head to look at him.

"I saw my father," she told him, her eyes still dazed with the realization that she'd faced a nightmare and come off unscathed.

"Where? What happened? Are you all right?" Dan ran his hands over her arms, his eyes sharp as he sought some sign of injury. "Did he touch you? I'll kill him if he hurt you."

"I'm all right." Her smile was shaky around the edges but she could feel the shock fading. "I'm all right."

"Are you sure?" Dan sat back on his heels, his look still searching. "What happened?"

"I faced him. I looked him right in the eye and I didn't cringe in fear." The wonder of it was in her voice.

Hearing it, Dan let some of the tension ease out of his shoulders. His heart was still beating too fast. When he'd seen her with her head lying on the table, he'd thought for one terrifying moment that something was wrong.

"What happened?" he asked again, more calmly this time.

"I went to get groceries." She gestured vaguely to where the two bags still sat on the counter. "He was at the store. And I wasn't afraid of him. Not really. He's not nearly as big as I'd thought. In my mind he was huge. But he's really just average size. Nothing but a filthy, ragged old man. And that's what I told him."

"You told him that?" Despite the fact that his heart was still beating too fast, Dan's mouth twitched. "How did he react?"

"I think he was shocked that I hadn't collapsed at his feet. And then he was angry. For a minute, I thought he might hit me."

Dan's hands were loosely clasped around hers as he knelt in front of her. His fingers tightened. "He didn't, did he?"

"No. Mr. Johnson, the store manager, came out. He asked if I knew him. And I said he was no one."

"My God, you do like to live dangerously, don't you?"

Kelly's laughter was tremulous. "I guess I do. I wasn't afraid of him anymore. He can't hurt me again, can he?"

"No."

"I can't believe I said he was no one." Her giggle was more nerves than amusement.

"You're a lot tougher than you look," Dan said, smiling at her.

"I guess I am."

"You're sure you're okay?"

"I'm fine. In fact, I think I feel better than I have in weeks. Oh, Dan, I'm finally free of him." Without thinking she leaned forward, throwing her arms around his neck.

Dan caught her with one arm, balancing himself against the table with his free hand when her exuberance threatened to tumble them both to the floor. Laughing, he stood, lifting her off her feet with an arm about her waist.

Kelly's head fell back, her eyes smiling into his. It seemed the most natural thing in the world to bend his head and kiss her, tasting her smile with his mouth. For a moment, her lips relaxed under his, her body soft against him.

Only a moment and then she stiffened, turning her head to the side at the same time that her arms pushed away from him. Dan released her instantly, startled by her nearly violent rejection. She stared at him wide-eyed, something that could have been fear in her eyes. But, no, it couldn't be fear because the next instant it was gone. And so was the sparkle of pleasure.

Dan opened his mouth to apologize and then closed it with a snap. He was damned if he was going to apologize for a perfectly innocent kiss. She was the one who had thrown herself into his arms and there'd been nothing in that kiss to warrant her reaction.

"I wasn't going to ravish you on the table," he said irritably.

"I know. I... are you going to be home for dinner tonight?"

And so ends another deeply insightful discussion, Dan thought, surprised at the depth of his frustration. He'd told himself he could be patient, but his patience was wearing a bit thin around the edges.

"No, I'm not" The truth was he didn't have anywhere else to go. But he wasn't in the mood to spend the evening in this apartment, which seemed to be growing smaller every day. He didn't want to pretend to do paperwork or watch TV, while Kelly pretended to study.

He didn't want to watch her close the bathroom door behind her and hear the water come on in the shower and then sit there with his imagination running wild, picturing her all wet and inviting.

"I just came home to pick up a change of clothes and then I was going to the gym. Unless you'd like me to stay," he offered, not sure whether or not he wanted her to take him up on it.

"No. I'm going to study."

"Are you sure? You're not feeling a little nervous after seeing your father?"

"No. I feel fine. I think it was really good for me. You go ahead and go to the gym."

There was no reading anything beneath the careful smile she wore. Dan swallowed the urge to curse roundly. Why was she so bloody determined to keep him at a distance?

He was no closer to an answer an hour later when Ben collapsed against the bleachers in the gym, holding up a weak hand for mercy.

"You're getting soft in your old age," Dan told him heartlessly. He sat down a few feet away, spinning the basketball between his hands. Patches of sweat darkened the back of his T-shirt and drew circles under his arms.

"I thought this was supposed to be a friendly game of one-on-one," Ben protested, dragging himself upright so that he could lean against the bleachers. "You were playing for blood."

"Was I?" Dan tossed the ball up in the air and caught it Despite thirty minutes of brutal play, there was still a coiled restlessness about him. The physical exertion hadn't exorcised the demons riding him.

"You want to tell me what's going on with you and Kelly?"

"No."

"Well, that's honest enough," Ben said, nodding. "I could accept that and change the subject, but I don't think you're going to be safe to turn loose on a basketball court until you get it off your chest. What's going on?"

"Nothing's going on except that she's driving me crazy," Dan said moodily.

"I'm glad it's nothing serious."

"I don't know what she wants," Dan said, ignoring Ben's flippant remark. "I'm taking care of her. I've given her a home, have said I'll get her into college. We're going to have a kid together. And she still acts like she expects me to grow fangs and turn into Dracula one night What does she want from me?"

"You really want my opinion?"

"No."

"Good." Ben settled himself more comfortably, eyeing his friend with a mixture of sympathy and amusement "Have you told her you love her?"

The basketball shot into the air, landing in the bleachers with a thump. Dan paid it no attention, fixing Ben with a surprised look.

"No."

"Why not?"

"Why not? Well, because I don't. I like her. I admire her guts. She faced down her father today, did I tell you?"

"Twice." The dry interruption was ignored.

"She's got more courage than she realizes. And she's a fighter—but I'm not in love with her."

"Uh-huh."

"She's got a good sense of humor and sometimes, when she laughs, her nose wrinkles. It's kind of cute, really. And she's a hard worker. She's really worked on the stuff for the exam. She'll probably ace it But she's too young."

"Some people are born old," Ben said to no one in particular.

"Sometimes she does seem almost older than I am. If I were planning on falling in love again..." He shook his head. "But I'm not"

"I wasn't aware that falling in love was something one put on an agenda."

"She's got her whole life ahead of her. School and a career and...stuff."

"You know, you're right." Ben seemed struck by this. "She's much too young. I bet, in a year or two, she'll meet some handsome guy—in college, perhaps—and they'll fall madly in love. They'll get married. She'll have other kids."

Out of the corner of his eye, he watched the flush slowly rise in Dan's face as he contemplated the future that had just been outlined.

"Maybe she'll even ask you to the wedding."

"Like hell!"

Ben looked at him, his eyes wide with surprise. "You know, if I didn't know better I might think that sounded like jealousy."

Dan stared at him, the flush slowly fading as he realized how neatly he'd been trapped. "You lousy son of a bitch!"

"I'm glad we're friends, too." Ben stood and stretched. Dan climbed to his feet more slowly, his eyes glazed. At another time, Ben might have felt sorry for him. As it was, he clapped him on the back with heartless good cheer. "Don't look so shocked. It happens to the best of us."

Dan watched him leave the gym, whistling softly under his breath. He felt as if he'd been struck in the solar plexus, driving all the air from his lungs.

He was in love with Kelly. Why hadn't he realized it before? Of course he was in love with her. He felt a foolish grin stretch his mouth. How could he not be in love with her?

But did she feel the same? The grin faded. She had to love him. She simply had to. And if she didn't, well, then he'd just do his damnedest to make her fall in love with him.