The Blogger and the Hunk (13 page)

* * *

“A
re you okay, Penelope?” Sarah asked, looking up from her edits.

“What? Yeah, of course I am! Why do you ask?” Penelope responded, a bit confused.

“You just poured salt in your tea.” Sarah pointed at the saltshaker in Penelope’s hand.

“Oh shit,” Penelope softly groaned, placing the saltshaker on the table and pushing her spoiled tea to the side.

“Want to talk about it?”

Penelope sighed, hesitating a bit. “It... it’s a guy I know. No big deal.”

“Oh boy. You’re beginning to have feelings for him?”

Penelope nodded.

“What’s the problem? Is he married? Has children? Is he into BDSM?”

“Oh gosh! None of that!” Penelope laughed. “My story is not one of your novels.”

“Hey, you never know. A lot of the books I write are based on people I’ve met, and a little bit of my own imagination.” She smiled and winked. “So? Which is it?”

Penelope’s smile disappeared. “Can you keep a secret?”

Sarah crossed her heart as an oath of secrecy.

“I met this guy at a bar. We got to talking, and I was completely shocked that he seemed interested in me. Needless to say, we kissed, and... well I kind of went home with him,” Penelope hesitantly confessed.

“Wow, you didn’t waste any time.” Sarah smiled, leaning in to listen to the rest of the story.

Penelope laughed. “But that’s not all of it.”

“Tell me more.”

“I met him again at my sister’s engagement party.”

“Wait... what?”

“He turned out to be my sister’s maid of honor,” Penelope confessed.

“What?” Sarah yelled.

Penelope looked at her sheepishly.

“I swear, your love life is worthy of being published. So, your sister’s maid of honor turned out to be your one-night stand.” Sarah sat in her chair with a huff. “This is a lot for my poor old brain to take in. I can just imagine what you must have gone through when you found out.”

“It wasn’t pretty. I almost fell to the ground before he caught me, got drunk, and passed out in between some bushes. The next morning I woke up in his bed with a nasty bump on my temple.”

“In his bed? You mean, you....” Sarah lifted her eyebrows.

“Oh, God no! I would never be able to live with myself!” Penelope laughed.

“So what now?”

Penelope frowned again. “I don’t know,” she whined, burying her head in her hands. “I’m not the kind of girl he goes for. He likes the fit, sexy, confident model with exotic eyes. I barely have any self-esteem left to get myself out of bed every morning and leave my apartment!”

Sarah looked at Penelope with an interested gleam in her eye. “You are much more confident than you realize. But until you fully embrace being yourself, just remember that you are entitled to love just like anyone else, no matter who it is.”

Penelope managed a smile at the author’s words of wisdom. “Now, where did we leave off with Lord Ravenswood and Miss Mattie?” she asked, turning the manuscript in front of her to the last page marked off. Everything was going to be okay. At least for now. She would just have to deal with her unresolved feelings for Jack later. It wasn’t like they were going anywhere anytime soon, right?

R
emember when I mentioned that if you had a great first experience with sex you’d crave it plenty afterwards? I sort of lied. At least to myself. The only person I would ever want to have sex with again would be him, my one-night stand. I try to picture myself with another guy in bed and I can’t. His face always appears. If only I could convince him, only for a little while, that he wants me too.

DIARY OF A WALLFLOWER: Entry 160

“I cannot believe you brought me here.”

“Oh, come on. You’ve never been inside one before?”

Penelope looked at Jack, horrified. “No!”

“So, that means you buy your toys online,” Jack replied nonchalantly. “Makes sense.” He chucked Penelope under her chin, to which she responded with a punch to his stomach in annoyance. He groaned. “What was that for?”

“Don’t act like you’re not trying to embarrass me. And stop touching my chin. One day you’ll accidentally break my teeth.” She couldn’t keep her blood from rushing to her face.

They were standing in the parking lot of a small pink shop with tinted windows and a blinking sign that read XXX. Penelope shook her head ferociously and turned to get back inside Jack’s car. She was all for being spontaneous, but she’d never expected her first time at an adult store to be with Jack.

He was quick to grab her hand and pull her back toward him, throwing an arm around her shoulders to keep her from opening the door and climbing in the car. “Oh, no you don’t. We’ve got some shopping to do.”

“Couldn’t we just order whatever it is we need online like normal people?” Penelope tried wrestling out of his grasp. Of course, the guy wouldn’t budge no matter how much she struggled.

“What would be the fun in that? Besides, we don’t have time for that. The party is next week and we still have a few more stops to make before then.” It was Wednesday already and the party was set to happen the following Saturday night. They had originally planned to rent out a limo and bar hop the whole night, until one of the bridesmaids had mentioned her parents had a pool house they would be able to use for the event. Penelope had ordered the cake, and Jack had been adamant about ordering booze in bulk.

“Remind me why we’re here in the first place,” Penelope whispered as they both opened the gate and let themselves in the shop. The lighting was flickering slightly. Along the walls were shelves, and racks placed in the middle of the store were filled with toys, lingerie, candy, condoms—everything a porn star would need for a film.

“We’re looking for some balloons, penis lollipops, and maybe a baby doll for yourself?” he teased, bumping her shoulder with his.

“Ha! In your dreams, pervert!” She slipped out of his arms and looked around the shop, trying to keep her blushing to a minimum. She tried not looking at anything for too long, worried that Jack would think she was daydreaming about sex. Although daydreaming of Jack in a thong didn’t sound like too bad of an idea....

No!
She had to pull herself together. They were just going to buy what they needed and get the fuck out of there.

“What do you think of these?” Jack asked, coming from behind some display shelves with a container of...

“Penis rings?” Penelope asked, reading off the label.

“Yeah, they’re different colors, small, and a piece of jewelry. Don’t women like rings?”

Penelope didn’t answer, still too shocked to come up with any response.

“Think of these as the adult version of a Ring Pop.” Jack grinned, enjoying her discomfort a little too much.

“Jack, those don’t even go on your fingers. They go on your...
cock
.” She whispered the word.

He moaned playfully and leaned in toward her. “I love it when you talk dirty to me.”

She let out a nervous laugh. It started soft at first, then got louder as she laughed at the absurdity of it all. Two months ago she’d been too busy reading, blogging, and editing day in and day out. She never even liked drinking. Ever since Jack came into her life, it seemed like her alcohol consumption had increased and he had her getting out of her comfort zone. Now she was planning her sister’s wedding while crushing on the MOH. What the hell was wrong with her?

Ugh, get a grip, Penelope. He’s just a guy you happened to lose your virginity to and are now obligated to hang out with.

Not that she was complaining really. She was sure that after the wedding she would never have to see Jack. Except for maybe the occasional visit he’d make if Celeste wanted to hang out. And then there were holidays and birthdays. She shook her head. He’d most likely visit his own family and she was overreacting. Or perhaps it was wishful thinking.

* * *

“H
ey! Earth to Penelope! What’s up, it looked like I lost you there for a second,” Jack asked Penelope, concern furrowing his brow.

“Sorry, I was thinking about something. I guess the... uhh... penis rings are a good idea,” she replied halfheartedly.

Jack didn’t really understand the penis obsession for bachelorette parties. When it came to the number of sex partners, most women still believed in never confessing to how many dicks they had sucked. When bachelorette parties came along... boy, they went all out. No stone unturned. No cock...
un-sucked
?

He turned back to Penelope, who was sifting through the penis-shaped party favors. She looked distracted, and that didn’t sit well with him at all. This was supposed to be fun! He had wanted to take her out of her comfort zone, to make her do something she would never do herself. Why he even cared, he had no idea. Maybe it just made him feel better helping a lost soul. The woman was twenty-six years old for crying out loud, and he had been her first and only sex partner! She needed all the help she could get. And if by some chance he got lucky with her a second time, it was just a bonus. Not that he was wishing for it.

“What about these penis straws? They’d be great for the decor,” Penelope stated, scrunching up her nose in doubt as she looked at the packaged dick straws. “Maybe I’ll get them in another color. They look kind of gross in flesh.” She was mumbling to herself again.

“Speaking of colored dicks. You never did tell me the color of your vibe?”

That got her attention. Penelope looked up at him in shock, her face a pretty pink color. And then, in an instant, her expression became serious and she shushed him.

“Instead of asking questions that are none of your business, make yourself useful and carry these,” she replied, throwing the bag of straws, purposely aiming at his face. His football player reflexes kicked in, and he caught the bag.

“What about the blow-up doll?”

“What about it?” Penelope asked.

“Are you planning on taking one?”

“What’s the use? The bridesmaids are insisting on hiring strippers for the party.”

Jack stopped in his tracks. “Wait, what? Strippers?”

Penelope nodded. “Yep. They’ve been talking about going to visit some high-class stripper joint in Hollywood on Friday just in time for the party next week.”

“I thought you guys weren’t planning on getting strippers for the party.”

Penelope turned to look at him, a confused look on her face. “Why wouldn’t we get them? They’re strippers.”

“So you’ll be enjoying them too, eh?” Jack smirked. “You know, you could always hire me to dance for you.”

“Y-you?” Penelope asked, a little breathless. Jack was about to tease her a little more before she suddenly burst into a fit of giggles.

“What’s so wrong with me? You haven’t seen my moves. Well, you did get a little show the night we spent together.”

Penelope couldn’t stop her fit, and Jack was getting a little annoyed. “Okay, I’m sorry. That’s very rude of me,” she said with a smile on her face. “I’m sure you move beautifully.” She’d pinched her lips together, Jack noticed, probably to stop herself from laughing.

Jack smiled, a little triumphant that he’d managed to make her go back to normal at least. She was finally getting more comfortable, which was what he’d been aiming for. What caught his breath was when she was comfortable enough to be herself without a care in the world.

He noticed she was trying really hard not to look through the lingerie. He started to chuckle, until he had a sudden flash of a vision of her wearing a skimpy black lace panties and bra set. They would hug her in all the right places. What was that god-awful saying people used?
More cushion for the pushin’.
Well they did have a point. But the direction his thoughts were going wasn’t going to put a damper on the hard-on threatening to grow if he didn’t think of anything to make it go away, and fast.

“Do you know what you’re giving them for their wedding?” Penelope asked, oblivious to Jack’s turmoil.

The mention of Celeste’s name did the trick.
Penelope is your best friend’s sister, remember? You can’t mix the two together. To break Penelope’s heart is to break Celeste’s.
He let his mind give him a pep talk, which felt more like a brainwash than anything. Even his mind wasn’t sure what to think anymore.

“Jack?” Penelope questioned again, this time looking at him with a worried expression.

He quickly shook his head to clear it. “Uhh... some lingerie maybe? Think she’d appreciate a nice thong for Bryan’s trunk?” Jack joked, pointing at the male thong designed as an elephant.

Penelope’s eyes widened. Jack knew she was imagining the size of the penis that would actually fill the long elephant trunk.

“Too big?” Jack asked.

“Eww, I really don’t want to imagine Bryan’s
thing
. He’s my future brother-in-law! And he has sex with my sister. Don’t need that image in my head, thank you very much!”

“Would you rather imagine
my thing
?” Jack suggested, his voice low and soft.

Penelope visibly swallowed, but almost immediately had the hint of a smirk on her face. Jack’s dick twitched back to life.
Oh shit
, he thought. Penelope walked slowly right up to him and stood on her tiptoes to get as close to him as she could.

He could feel her warm breath on his neck, causing him to get goose bumps all over his body. “It’s blue,” she whispered.

Jack leaned back to take a look at her, confusion muddling his sex-infested brain. “What?”

“My vibe. It’s blue,” she softly confessed, licking her lips and turning around, heading toward the cashier with the party favors in her hands.

“I-I’ll catch up with you. I think I saw something over there... I’d....” Jack’s sentence died as he quickly walked away from her and tried to busy himself with the ugly blow-up doll selection, willing his hard-on to go away.

Dead birds, liver and onions, crying babies, grandma on the toilet,
he thought, as he tried to focus on anything, anyone but Penelope. For the first time, she had turned the seduction tables on him. And as much as he tried not to like it, he found it turned him on, very much.