The Boy in the Field (28 page)

You turned away from the building and headed underground.
Something about that building felt wrong, so unsafe that even the darkness of
the tunnel would be preferable to going inside that edifice. Each step blotted
out more of the dim moonlight until all you could do was put one foot in front
of the other and keep moving.

Gradually, you became aware of a faint, orange light glowing
somewhere ahead of you. You moved towards it to find something like an engorged
firefly encased in a walnut-sized cage attached to the wall. And there were
more of them, all captive, none moving, each shedding just enough light for you
to reach the next.

The stairs levelled out and you found yourself in a tiled tube.
Water sloshed beneath your feet, the water reflecting the light down the
tunnel. You continued forward, the liquid cold on your bare skin. Ahead, you
could see the end, a disc of bright yellow against the gloom. You rushed towards
it.

The new cylindrical room was wider but shorter than the passage
you had just left. Whatever it was that provided the light hung from the
ceilings in great, glass jars. The floor stopped suddenly seven feet from the
far edge of the room and crept towards it, looking over the edge. The drop
wasn’t far; you would be able to climb out if you fell.

You sat on the edge and studied the room, looking for another
way out. At each end of the gulley ahead of you, there was another pitch black
passageway. You looked back over your shoulder at the way in and yelped. Two
skeletal Ethans stood shoulder to shoulder, blocking the route. One had blood
down his front from a wound in his chest. The other held a knife.

Without thinking, you dropped off the ledge and hurried into
the tunnel. Water splashed beneath your feet, ankle-deep. You kept one hand on
the wall and the other outstretched in front, running blind in the darkness, no
fireflies to guide you. The tube twisted and curved and then there was light.
You emerged in another wide, cylindrical room, just like the first.

But not identical. The tiles were green, not white and the two
Ethans were only just making their way down the corridor to block your escape.
They were different too. One was staring at the palms of his hands. The other
had glazed eyes and a bruised throat. You ran past, not looking back.

The water grew deeper, up to your knees. It slowed you, but you
kept running, wading further into the tunnels. Darkness grew and faded. Another
cylindrical room. One Ethan held a sword, the blade thick with blood. The
other’s stomach was slashed open, the insides spilling out.

You shook your head and screamed, plunging again into the
depths of the tunnels, the water rising further. You held your hands above your
waist, trying to keep them dry. Tears blurred your vision as yet another room
opened from the tunnel. One of the Ethans was on his knees, chained. The other
held the keys.

Up to your chest. You could barely keep walking. One held a
rope. The other dangled three inches from the floor.

To your chin. One hand blood on his hands. The other’s head was
caved in.

Choice:
187. Just Give Up
or
260. Keep
Searching for an Exit

Just give up. Give up. You must give up. Give up! You have to
give up. You must give up. You can stop. You have to stop. You must stop. Give
up. Give it up. You have to give up.

It’s over. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give
up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. You have to stop. You
must give up.

This will kill you. Give up. IV. Give up. They’re dead. They’re
never coming back. Give up. Give up! Let this end. Now. End it. End it now. End
it. End it. Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up.

They’re never coming back. Give up. Stop. You said you would
stop. Why haven’t you stopped? IV. They’re dead. All gone. You can’t bring them
back.

Stop! You promised! This is your fault. You did this. You chose
this. You let them die. You made them die. You wanted them to die. IV. You did
this.

Why did you do this to me? Why have you let this happen? Get
out! You must get out! Give up. Give up. Give up. Give up. This will eat you
alive. This will kill you. You have only yourself to blame. You did this.

Choice: Keep Searching For An Exit
or
Give Up

“Our supervisor’s name is Vasoa Nusra. He works for Onda Lutra
and I frequently see him talking to a man in magister’s armour, but I’ve never
seen his face.”

“Why are you telling me this?”

“Because I need you to stay.” You slid your hand around his
wrist. “You said your informants weren’t cooperating. Now they are. Maybe this
will be enough for them to let you stay.”

“You’re turning on your friends for me?” He snorted. “You don’t
believe very strongly in your cause, do you?”

You shook your head. “I started fighting because I didn’t want
Landia to fall for nothing. I lost everything that night. And fighting against
Serlora didn’t bring you back. You don’t even believe in Kinel. What’s the point
in continuing? I’m fighting
against
you. It doesn’t make sense.”

He pulled you closer and ran his fingers through your hair.
“I’m glad you didn’t go to Itarsi.”

“I’m guessing we’d have never ended up here,” you said.

He pulled away from you and began to put on his shoes and coat.
“You’d be dead and I wouldn’t be looking at a promotion.”

You sat up and frowned. “Noah?”

He laughed. “You really believed it, didn’t you? You really
thought that even after what you did to me, I was going to forgive you and just
take you back.” He shook his head and moved towards you, a pair of metal cuffs
in his hand. “Stupid girl.”

“
Radha!”
You tried to move away from him but he had you
cornered, just like in your house when you met him. This time, you weren’t
going to let it end the same way.

You kicked out at him, striking him in the crotch. He doubled
over, hitting the floor with a dull thud. You didn’t look back, just ran for
the door, fleeing through the hallway of the inn. As you reached the entrance,
you slowed, knowing well that it was guarded; walking would attract less
attention.

You slipped into a narrow alleyway, trying to stay out of sight
as you made your way back home. Ethan wouldn’t look for you until morning and
the others wouldn’t yet know you were missing. And, because of you, they were
all in danger. You had to warn them.

The lights still flickered in the windows of the upstairs
apartment as the house came into view; they were awake. You checked the street
was clear before you crossed, but as you stepped out, a man lunged at you from
around the corner. You didn’t see his face. You didn’t see anything much.

Your hand was wet. Pain spread through your stomach. You looked
down. Blood. The lights grew dim as you felt someone grab the back of your
collar and pull you into one of the alleyways. The ground came closer. The
shiny surface of a puddle caught your eye and then was broken by raindrops. You
closed your eyes and let them fall against your face, unable to move.

Instruction:
199. Epilogue II

“Noah, I’m pregnant.”

He shifted, pushing you away and sitting up. “That’s not
possible. We were careful!”

“Not careful enough.” You looked up at him. “I’m not just
saying this so that you’ll stay. I can’t stop you leaving. I just wanted you to
know first.”

He chewed the inside of his mouth and then sighed. “This wasn’t
supposed to happen. This wasn’t in the plan.”

“You think it was part of mine?” You shook your head. “I won’t
be able to hide it forever and I can’t exactly explain it.” You laughed. “
Oh,
hey, Ethan. You know that time when you were supposed to kill your brother
because he’s the enemy, but you couldn’t find him? It’s because I was sleeping
with him. Surprise!
”

“Don’t say that. Whatever you do, don’t say that.” He reached
for your hand. “I’m sorry.”

“Are you still going to go?”

He smiled and shook his head, putting his arms around your
shoulders and pulling you closer. “No. I asked you to change the game. You
changed the game.”

* * *

You stopped fighting with the Liberationists three months
later. You moved out of the city with Noah a month after that, when he told his
superiors what had happened. He was taken off the Liberationist mission and
reassigned to street patrols, reducing his chances of promotion by half.

He stopped caring the day his daughter was born.

Devani Wicker was six and a half pounds and perfect. When Noah
held her, you knew he would never leave her, no matter what the consequences.
She was his entire world and not even another war would separate him from her.

Even Ethan understood when he saw her, visiting only after you
had persuaded Noah that he wouldn’t hurt her. For that afternoon, the three of
you were back together, bonding over baby Devani. For that afternoon, it felt
like she was the only one that mattered.

The End
(Back to start)

“Noah, sweetie, we have to go.”

You smile as you picked him up and took him up the stairs. It
wouldn’t be long before somebody turned on you, accusing you of plotting with
him. Noah would be taken away and you couldn’t let that happen.

You set him down on the floor and asked him to put his toys
into a bag while you packed clothes and a few valuables, things you could sell
if you got into trouble. Every time you touched something that belonged to
Ethan, thought of him. You wondered if you could have said or done something to
stop it happening.

“Shall we go on an adventure?” you said, looking down at your
son. “We can have a picnic and search for monsters and it’ll be so much fun.”

Noah’s face lit up. “Yeah!”

You took him back downstairs and packed what food you could
carry before leaving the house, locking the door and never looking back.

Travelling from Kinta with a young child wasn’t easy. It wasn’t
long before he complained that his feet hurt and he was hungry and he hadn’t
seen a single monster. You kept moving, carrying him short distances in between
stops and then letting him toddle along beside you again.

When you reached the next town, you booked into a small inn
under a false name and cut your hair in the bathroom. Every day was the same –
travelling until you found somewhere to sleep, using a new name and plotting a
route for the next day. You headed for the coast where you could stop and work
for a while before jumping on a ship bound for somewhere foreign and new to
settle, where no one would know your name and little Noah wouldn’t have to face
the stigma of association with Ethan, whatever people thought of him. That
little boy deserved better and you would do whatever it took to make sure he
had it.

The End
(Back to start)

It didn’t matter what you told them, people assumed you knew.
They didn’t believe that Ethan could have kept such a plan secret from you.
Sometimes you wondered if they weren’t right, if he really did betray you all
and give the Serlorans the excuse they needed to seize power – which was
exactly what they had done the moment King Sadin was declared dead.

But then little Noah would look up at you and ask where daddy
had gone and you knew he wouldn’t have done it. If it had been just you and
Ethan, maybe, but it wasn’t. Ethan loved that little boy like his own; he would
never abandon him.

You waited to hear about the court case, but nothing was
published in the papers and none of courthouses in town knew where the trial
would be held, only that it wasn’t there and it wasn’t that day. Part of you
wished they would hurry up and announce it; every day, someone would accuse you
of knowing more than you had said. Sometimes, you even received threats. Once,
you woke in the night to find a gang of kids outside the house, smashing your
windows with rocks.

It was that night that you knew you needed to move. You pulled
Noah from his bed a second before a half-brick landed on the pillow where his
head had been. Clutching him to your chest, you hid in a cupboard until
morning, waiting for them to leave. That day, you sold the house and moved
across town, taking only a fraction of its value to buy somewhere new.

As the days turned to months, you lost hope of ever hearing
about the trial. The Serlorans had probably already decided his fate in a
private session, never to let anybody know. It didn’t stop you looking, but it
stopped you asking.

With the money you made from selling some of Ethan’s
belongings, your new house too small to contain them, you sent Noah to school.
He made friends with the other children and you even started talking to their
parents. The best thing about life in such a big city was that no one really
knew who you were. You were talking to one of the other mothers on the way home
one day when Noah’s hand slipped out of yours and he ran on ahead, shouting at
a man on the other side of the street.

“Hello? Daddy! Hello?” he called.

You ran after him. “Noah. Wait!”

The man turned around, looking down at the boy. You slowed,
ready to apologise to him, but the words got lost as you made eye contact. He
had the same eyes as Ethan. The same eyes as your son. You ushered the boy
behind you.

“Noah, sweetie, go wait with Mrs Valkipa.”

“But I want to see daddy.”

You pursed your lips and shook your head. “Don’t argue with me,
Noah. Go.”

“But—-”

“If you’re not over there by the time I count to five, you’ll
be sorry. One. Two.”

Noah scowled and stomped away, looking back at you with a face
like a thunderstorm. You ignored him and gestured to Mrs Valkipa to take him
home before looking back at the man. The other Noah.

“He didn’t mention that you had a son,” he said. “That man
keeps a lot of secrets.”

“Ethan? You know where he is?” you asked, momentarily
forgetting everything else you wanted to say.

“Your running away makes sense now.”

You smiled. “I’m glad you understand. I—-”

“Understand?” He laughed. “I said it made sense. I didn’t say I
understood. I’ve put the pieces together, but I’ve no idea what the picture
is.” He shook his head. “I gave you everything I had. I did everything I could
to make you happy. I loved you! And then, when my world fell apart and I needed
you, and I needed Ethan, you took him and ran.”

Choice:
200. “Where Is Ethan?”
or
201. “It
Wasn’t Like That”