The Boys Start the War (13 page)

“… the pie-eating contest …”

“… volleyball.”

There was a long silence then, and for a moment Caroline thought the boys might have gone inside. She put her eye to the crack again. They were still on the grass.

“Unless …” Wally said, and Jake finished for him.

“… they go back to Ohio.”

“Yeah.” said Josh. “If the Bensons come back, it’s over.”

More silence.

“You know what I wish?” said Wally. “I hope the Bensons stay in Georgia long enough for us to do everything we’ve planned to do to the Malloys, and then come back.”

“Yeah,” said Jake. “That would be perfect.”

“A year and a half, maybe,” said Josh.

“Right,” said Wally.

“Let’s play horseshoes for a while,” Jake suggested. He got to his feet and started straight toward the shed.

No! He was coming here!
Caroline scrambled off
the toolbox, grabbing her lunch sack, and tried to hide behind the lawn mower.

The footsteps grew louder, then the sound of the hinges creaking as the door to the toolshed opened partway. Caroline saw Jake’s hand reach inside for the horseshoes on one shelf. She flattened herself against the back wall, but it was no use. Jake saw.

“What …?” His eyes opened wide. “Hey, guys, look what we caught!” Jake grinned as he opened the door wider. The others came running.

“It’s Caroline!” said Peter.

“Spying on us!” cried Wally.

And before Caroline could scramble back over the lawn mower and make her escape, Jake slammed the door shut.

“Bring me the bicycle padlock, Wally!” he yelled. “We’ve got a hostage, and her sisters aren’t getting her back without a ransom!”

Kidnapped!

W
ally and his brothers could not believe their good fortune! Caroline Malloy, trapped in the toolshed, and their parents away picking apples.

“We got her! We got her!” Peter sang, dancing around the yard. And then he stopped. “What’s a hostage, Wally?”

“A person you keep prisoner until somebody pays to get her back.” Wally told him. But then the enormity of what had happened began to sink in on him. How could this be? Only a few minutes ago he and his brothers were lying on their backs talking about Halloween and New Year’s, and suddenly Caroline Malloy was a prisoner in their toolshed!

“Man, they aren’t going to believe what we’re going to make them say to get her back, are they, Jake?” Josh was saying. “What was it they wanted us to promise to get our flashlight back?”

“I am honestly and truly sorry for the trouble I
have caused, and … something about an obedient servant of the realm.” said Wally.

“They are going to
crawl!
” said Jake. “They are going to
creep!
They are going to
beg!
We’re going to rub their noses in the dirt before we give their sister back. You hear that Caroline?” he yelled.

There was no answer from the toolshed.

“Probably crying.” said Peter. He looked around a little worriedly.

“You crying, Caroline?” asked Josh.

“Hoo boy, can she cry! You ought to see her up there onstage! The tears just pour.” Wally put in.

“Well, we didn’t make her go in the shed,” said Josh.

“Right!” said Peter. “She went in there all by herself, didn’t she Wally?”

“How are we going to get a note to her sisters, though, without her parents finding out?” Wally wondered. “What if her folks start looking for her?”

“Then we’ve got to reach Beth and Eddie before they do. We’ll say something about how we found her on our property.” Jake decided.

“Yeah! Trespassing!” said Wally, “That’s a crime, isn’t it?”

“We could call the police!” Peter whooped.

“Her sister will come and get her, you’ll see,” said Jake. “Come on. Let’s write the note.”

The boys went over to the back steps and sat down Wally got a pencil and paper, and Jake dictated: “To whom it may concern ….”

“‘Namely, Whomper and Weirdo,’” added Josh.

“‘… Caroline the Crazie was found spying on our property, and is now being held prisoner in our toolshed.’”

Wally wrote it down.

“‘If you tell anybody,’” Jake continued, “‘we will tell your folks all the stuff you’ve done so far to us. If you want to see Caroline again, you’ve got to crawl over to our house on your hands and knees…’”

“‘Lick our shoes …’” said Josh.

“They’ll never do that.” said Wally, “not even for Caroline.”

“Okay. ‘Crawl over to our house on your hands and knees and say,
We are honestly and truly sorry for the trouble we have caused, and
…’” Jake paused again.

“‘Will be your obedient servants…’” said Josh.

“No. Obedient slaves,” said Jake. “That’s it.”
We are honestly and truly sorry for the trouble we have caused, and will be your obedient slaves forever.

“Perfect,” said Josh.

Wally started to write it, then stopped. “I can’t imagine Eddie saying ‘your obedient slave forever.’”

“Yeah.” said Josh gloomily. “I can’t imagine them crawling on their hands and knees either.”

“Well, they thought
we
would say something
like this!” Jake reminded him. “Go ahead. Write it, Wally. Make them squirm a little. Maybe they
won’t
do any of it, but they’ve got to at least say they’re sorry.”

Wally finished the note.

“How do we sign it?” Josh wondered.

“How did they sign theirs?” asked Jake.

“The Malloy Musketeers,” said Wally.

Jake thought a minute. “The Hatford Hooligans,” he decided, and they all signed their names.

“Who’s going to deliver it?” asked Josh. “Peter?”

“Are you crazy?” said Jake. “They’ll simply kidnap Peter!”

“We’ll
all
deliver it” said Josh. “All four of us will go over there together. Caroline can’t escape, don’t worry.”

The boys looked toward the toolshed again.

“Hey, Caroline!” Wally called.

No answer.

“Hey, Crazie!” called Josh.

Still no answer.

“Maybe she dug her way out,” said Peter.

The boys started across the lawn. Wally was feeling a little uneasy, the sun was shining right on the metal shed; and he knew how hot it got in the summertime, it wasn’t summer any longer, but it was still warm. Maybe she had overheated. Maybe she was dead!

“Listen, guys, I don’t know if we ought to keep
her in there,” he said. “That shed gets awfully hot in the afternoons.”

“Did
we
put her there?” Jake said. “It was her idea. She would have stayed all day, I’ll bet, if we hadn’t found her. All we did was put a padlock on the door.”

“But suppose she got sick or something?” Wally said. “Man, we’d really catch it.”

They stopped outside the shed.

“Hey, Caroline,” Josh said again. “Are you dead?”

“Oh, she’s just playing possum to make you open the door,” said Jake.

“Remember that hot day in August when our old dog got distemper?” Wally reminded them. They looked at each other uneasily.

“Hey, Caroline, you want some water?” Wally called.

No answer. No sound at all.

Jake dialed the combination on the lock and opened the door, just a little.

They all stepped backward. Caroline was sitting on the floor of the shed, her eyes closed. White foam was oozing out one corner of her mouth.

“What’s the matter with her?” asked Peter.

“I don’t know,” said Jake. “Hey, Caroline, come on out. You can go home now.”

Caroline opened her eyes once, and they looked wild. Then they closed again.

“Jake … I,” Wally said worriedly.

“Go on home, Caroline.” Jake said.

The girl didn’t move.

“What are we going to do?” asked Wally, and his heart began to pound.

“Forget the note,” said Jake, and Wally knew he was worried too. “Go call her sisters, Wally, and tell them to come and get her. That Caroline’s over here sick.”

Wally made a beeline for the house, and went up the steps two at a time.

He quickly dialed the Malloys’ number. What if the parents answered? What was he supposed to say? That Caroline was locked in the toolshed foaming at the mouth?

The phone rang five times before anyone answered.

“Hello?” It sounded like Eddie.

“Your sister’s sick,” said Wally.

There was a pause. “Who is this?” Eddie asked.

“Wally. Caroline’s in our toolshed. You better come and get her.”

“Yeah? What kind of a trick is this?” Eddie said. “I saw your folks drive away. You must think we’re really stupid.”

Wally’s hand felt sweaty on the telephone. “Listen,” he said again. “I mean it. She’s foaming at the mouth.”

“What?”

“We just unlocked the shed and I think she’s got distemper. There’s white stuff all over her lips.”

“Hold on.” It sounded as though Eddie had her hand over the receiver and was talking to somebody else. Then Beth came on the line.

“What’s the matter with Caroline?” Beth asked.

“I already said! She’s foaming at the mouth and acting weird, and you better come get her.”

“How did she get in your shed?” asked Beth.

“She went there herself. We didn’t put her there. She was spying on us.”

“Then how did the shed get locked?”

“After we found her, we locked the door.”

“Well, if you locked her in there and she’s sick, you better call an ambulance,” Beth said, and hung up.

Wally stared at the phone in his hand. Then slowly replaced the receiver and went out to the others on the back steps.

“Are they coming?” asked Jake.

Wally shook his head. “They said to call an ambulance.”

“Hoo boy!” Josh whistled through his teeth. “We can’t call an ambulance! Dad would be furious!”

“Yeah, but if something happened to her and we didn’t, he’d kill us,” Wally said.

The boys stared at each other. “You think we should try to carry her home ourselves?” Jake said.

“Let’s try,” said Wally.

They went back to the shed again. Caroline had
crawled behind the lawn mower now, and was making strange noises, half dog, half human.

“What’s she doing?” asked Peter, eyes wide.

“Biting her own arm!” breathed Josh, and the boys retreated slowly to the back steps.

“What if she’s rabid?” asked Wally.

“Don’t be dumb.”

“What if she
is
? What if a strange dog bit her before they left Ohio and nobody even knew it?”

Jake let out his breath. “Boy, I hope she leaves before Mom and Dad get home.” He hunched his shoulders. “Look,” he said to Wally. “Go call Beth and Eddie again, and tell them we’ll make a deal. They come and get Caroline, and we’ll call off the war for good. No more tricks again ever.”

Wally went back inside and called the Malloys. Eddie answered again.

“Listen,” he began. It was all he could think of to say. “Come over and get Caroline, and we’ll call off the war for good. No more tricks again ever.”

“No deal,” Eddie said, and the receiver clicked again.

Wally reported it to the others.

“They
have
to take her!” bleated Jake. “She’s their
sister!
What kind of sisters are they if they won’t even come and get someone who’s rabid!”

“What time is it?” asked Josh.

Jake looked at his watch. “Almost two. Mom and Dad could be driving back any minute.”

Wally’s stomach seemed to turn upside down.
“It doesn’t matter whether we took the padlock off or not,” he said finally. “The fact is we
did
have the padlock on for a while, so that she couldn’t get out if she’d wanted to. And she
was
in there for at least an hour. That might have been long enough to do it. We’re responsible no matter what.”

“I’m not touching her,” said Josh.

“Me either,” said Peter.

“
I’ll
call the Malloys,” Jake said, and his voice sounded a little shaky. Wally went back inside with him. Jake dialed.

This time the phone must have rung ten times before Eddie answered.

“Yes?” she said loudly, impatiently. Wally was standing three feet away and he could hear every word she said. “What is it
now
?”

“Look,” Jake began.

“Look … listen.… Is that all you guys can say?”

“We’ll make any kind of deal you want if you just come and get Caroline,” Jake told her.

The silence this time must have lasted for ten whole seconds. To Wally it seemed forever.

“Any kind of deal we want?”

“Yeah. Just come and get her.”

“Say, ‘Please.’”

“Please,” murmured Jake.

“Say, ‘Pretty please.’”

Wally heard Jake swallow. “Pretty please,” he said.

“Say, ‘Pretty please from your faithful and obedient servant.’”

“Hey, listen.…”

“
Say
it!”

“Pretty please from your …”

There was the sound of a car pulling in the drive.

“The
folks
are home!” Jake said into the receiver. “Come and get her! Hurry!”

“Say the rest.…”

“Your faithful, obedient servant,” Jake said, and hung up the phone. “I think I’m going to throw up,” he said to Wally.