The Braille Club Undone (The Braille Club #3) (22 page)

“What, that’s it? I’m guilty as charged.”

“The video was pretty conclusive. There is no ambiguity over what you were doing,” said Phil coldly. “You’re fucked.”

Si sat down on the sofa. “I’ll bloody sue that paper, it was a set up,” he said angrily.

“You don’t change,” said Phil, incredulity in his tone. “It’s all about you. Have you thought how this will affect Tess?”

“Tess this and Tess that. Fuck Tess,” screamed Si. “Where is she when I need her?”

“You’re pathetic,” said Phil. I’m glad she’s come to her senses and left you.

“Shut up, Phil,” Si raged.

“You will get what you deserve, Si...a good kick in the bollocks and it couldn’t happen to a nicer guy. You couldn’t even keep it in your trousers on your wedding night. Broke my heart to see Tess asking where you were. Everyone knew you were upstairs shagging her maid of honour. You disgust me.”

Si’s face had grown hot but he said nothing.

“Truth hurts doesn’t it? Well, I’m not finished. You’ve shagged your way through so many women; the papers won’t struggle to get collaboration. They’re probably queuing up as a matter of fact. I bet they can’t wait to tell about the biggest man whore on television. No pay off this time. I warned you but I don’t know why I wasted my breath.”

“Finished,” said Si quietly.

“Oh yes, I’m finished...and so are you,” said Phil, turning on his heel. “I’ll see myself out.”

The door slammed. Si put his head in his hands. He was trembling. Phil had hit the target. He’d hurt Si where it mattered most...his ego. He tried to tell himself Phil was being dramatic but couldn’t pull it off. When he’d heard the disgust in Phil’s voice, he’d felt an unfamiliar emotion—shame. Phil was right, he hadn’t once thought of Tess and how his behaviour affected her. Now it might be too late. He might have lost her already. As he poured more wine into his glass, he felt very sorry for himself. What would he do without his work? How would he pay the bills? He had some funds but the cost of building the bloody house had wiped out a sizeable chunk of his savings. With only enough money to last about six months, he’d be forced to sell it. With the property market depressed, he’d lose a bundle.

Si caught himself; once again he hadn’t considered Tess. Would she carry on without him? Jealously burned deep inside him; he didn’t want his wife co-hosting with another man. Just the thought of her with someone else had him clenching his fists. He realised with alarming clarity, he didn’t want to lose Tess. She was his leveller, keeping him balanced, and somehow controlled the worst of his addictions. The first night apart and look what had happened? Si stared at his mobile morosely, wishing Tess would call. He was desperate to hear her voice. Desperate to feel her warm body against his but it remained silent. Si drank steadily. He knew the papers would have the full story in print by tomorrow. As time passed his thoughts slowed. A persistent ringing woke Si, he fumbled for his phone, it was Tess.

“Hello, Tess?” He could hear her crying. “I’m sorry, Tess,” he blurted.

“It hurts, Si,” she mumbled.

“What hurts?” said Si confused.

“I’m bleeding. Hurry, Si, I can’t hold on much longer,” Tess whispered.

Si registered a shock of alarm. “Where are you, Tess?” He heard her gasp and moan. “Tess?”

“Harrison’s, hurry,” said Tess, and hung up.

Si was in complete panic. He rang Tess’s phone back but it went straight to answer machine. He rang Harrison’s, and they confirmed Tess had checked in, but when they rang her room there was no reply. Si was still drunk, he squinted at his watch, it was two a.m. He stood dithering. The last thing he needed was more publicity, but if Tess had harmed herself...tried to kill herself, then everyone would blame him. Si stopped, he couldn’t believe he’d just thought about himself first, before Tess. God, he really was disgusting. He should ring the hotel back and get someone to check on Tess, but chose instead to go to her. Searching for his car keys he knew he was over the limit but he didn’t have time to wait. This was a life and death situation; he’d risk it.

He half expected the press to be outside but his garden was empty. He slipped inside the Porche and started the engine. As he swung out of his drive way, he pressed hard on the accelerator. Tess’s voice haunted him, “I’m bleeding.” Images of her in the bath with her wrists slashed sprang to mind and he moaned. Her weakened voice telling him how much it hurt and to hurry, made his driving reckless as he headed to the private members’ club. He had pushed Tess to this. His thoughtless and selfish desires had caused his wife to take her life. Si didn’t think he could get much lower. Tess’s favourite phrase was playing through his head on a constant loop. “I can’t live without you.” She always smiled when she said it. He hadn’t told her he was leaving but Tess was smart...maybe she’d suspected the truth. The scenery outside flashed by in a blur as Si neared his destination. Seeing an available space he parked the car. His heart thumped as he went inside. The girl at reception was the same one he’d spoken to earlier. She gave him a key, accepting his story, he wanted to surprise his wife.

Si quickly went to the room and opened the door. It was dime inside but he saw Tess immediately. Her face was grey. She was clutching her stomach. Relief surged through him as he saw her wrists were uncut. She was okay until he registered she was in pain.

“Tess. What’s wrong, Tess?” he asked her urgently.

She turned her anguished eyes to meet his. Tears poured down her face. “I think I’m losing the baby,” she gasped.

He stared at her, confused. Baby? What baby? Tess wasn’t making sense.

“I’m pregnant, Si,” said Tess.

Si was rooted to the spot. Pregnant. Of all the scenarios he’d envisioned this was not among them. “Are you sure?” he asked doubtfully.

“Yes, Si. I need to get to the hospital. Something is wrong.”

“Okay.” He was suddenly calm. “Do you think you can walk?” he asked.

Tess shook her head; her face a mask of pain and misery. He moved to the bed and sat down. He stroked the sodden hair from her face. Her skin was clammy.

“I’m sorry, Tess,” he hung his head. “I’m sorry for everything.”

“Please,” she whispered. “The baby.” He rose and opened the room door. He pulled the sheet from her and lifted her in his arms. She was so light. So fragile.

Next he was walking down the corridor; hitching her up in his arms as he summoned the lift. Tess buried her face in his chest. He could hear her moans of pain. His heart lurched. Next the receptionist was running towards him. Others helped him put Tess in the car. A call was made to the hospital. They were expecting him. The journey and arrival were a blur. Tess was taken from him and now all he could do was wait, but at least she was safe. He felt people’s stares but ignored them. He tried to process this new turn of events. Fear and nausea gripped him. He could not speak to Tess about the newspapers. She’d been silent throughout the journey. Her eyes closed.

Tess was pregnant. The shock of discovery had been replaced by anxiety. Tess was convinced she was losing the baby. Si was numb—emotions in turmoil. A baby…he sat stunned. His baby. The media stories receded from his mind. Si’s feelings clarified. His wife had been pregnant and he’d put her through hell. His self-loathing made him want to claw at his own flesh.

“Mr Lawrence?”

Si looked up to see the doctor’s grim face and froze.

“Yes,” he whispered.

“You may see your wife now,” he said calmly. His expression neutral now but Si had saw his earlier look of disgust.

Gulping down his fear, he stood and followed him.

The Braille Club Undone

The Braille Club, London. Two Years On. The Swingers Zone Trial. The sudden sound of the bell made them all jump. A collected moan of disappointment escaped them. Guy stood and slipped from the room.

Noor

Noor was so distracted with her father; she’d failed to consider the implications. Her past, again, had come back to haunt her. She’d been so happy over the last weeks with her father’s recovery and her blossoming romance—Maalik had slipped her mind. When she answered her phone and heard his voice, she realised what a fool she’d been. As she listened to his cruel words her face burned with shame. When he told her the wedding was off a crushing pain shot through her. She begged him to reconsider. Saying she’d do anything to make things right; the wrong thing to say to a man like Maalik. She knew immediately what he wanted but she wasn’t that type of girl anymore. Virinder’s love had changed her forever. She would always be grateful for that, no matter what happened. A few months ago the news would have broken her, but not now. She had no intention of speaking to or seeing Maalik but felt sure he would seek her out. Men like that always did.

How did Virinder feel? She had no way of knowing. Disappointment coursed through her. She had called him over and over with no response. History
was
repeating itself. Virinder was acting just as Ayran had. However, this time Noor would keep her dignity. She would not contact him again. The whole marriage had been a charade from the beginning, except along the way, Noor had fallen in love. She didn’t notice the tears sliding down her face. Virinder had been too good to be true. She knew that now. She didn’t want to be alone in the flat, in case Maalik paid her a visit, so left early to visit her father. He would miss Virinder terribly, and Noor’s heart tightened. She didn’t care what happened to her but her father was making progress. She worried Virinder's absence would set him back. Anxiety gnawed at her insides. What a mess, she thought in despair. Throughout the visit with her father he had asked about Virinder. He had not come to see him today and her father was worried he was ill.

His concern should have made Noor happy because taking an interest, showed he cared enough to be worried. Noor told him Virinder had to work and that he was sorry. Her father accepted this but still looked disappointed. Noor always switched her phone off when she visited her father and was surprised to see several missed calls, but none where from Virinder. She noticed she had a voicemail. With trepidation she listened.

Voicemail: Hello, Noor, it’s Virinder’s sister. Could you call me back, please?

God, Noor fumed, she’d got the message. Virinder didn’t need to involve his sister. Furiously, Noor deleted the other three voicemails and slipped her phone into her bag. The bus seemed to be taking longer than usual tonight and Noor slumped on the seat at the bus stop to wait. She saw the car moving slowly up the street and was surprised when it pulled up at the bus stop. A tall, elegant woman got out of the car.

“Noor?” she asked.

When Noor looked at her face she knew immediately something was terribly wrong.

Virinder

Virinder spent over two weeks in hospital. His father had broken his ribs and his lung had collapsed. He was lucky the ambulance arrived so quickly. He also had some internal bleeding but was healing well. His sister and Noor had been his constants. The events had been shocking for both of them to process. Virinder could barely come to terms with it himself. Neither of his parents survived the fall. His father had been crushed under his mother’s weight and she had broken her neck in the impact of the fall. The police had been baffled when they arrived on the scene. Slowly they pieced together what had happened. Virinder’s statement fully supported the evidence they found. He had been worried that the police would think he had pushed his parents, but they did not. He’d no idea his mother was home and in one of the upstairs rooms. She must have heard everything. Maalik’s cruel words would be etched on Virinder’s mind forever; his last memory of his mother...a sad one. Her face had been contorted in rage as she rushed towards his father. However, he had got his revenge when he’d pulled her with him. Ultimately, it had killed him. The post-mortem said he died from injuries consistent with crushing.

Virinder had tortured himself with what ifs. He blamed himself. If only his father hadn’t grabbed his mother, he’d be alive now. If only his mother hadn’t pushed his father, she’d be alive. On and on his thoughts whirled. It was Noor who kept him sane; her beauty and strength unwavering. An inquest would be held and Virinder knew he could get through it with Noor at his side. She told him Maalik had called her saying the wedding was off. Virinder sensed there was more but although he pressed her, she would not tell him. Grief for his parents consumed him. Somehow he got through their funerals, he had no choice. His sister was devastated and he supported her as much as he could. Everything had happened because of the marriage. Noor wanted to postpone but Virinder had been adamant.

“If we do that my father will win and my mother will have died in vain,” he said. Virinder had told Noor he and his father had argued over the wedding and how his father had hit him. Suddenly, his mother was there and the next thing they were both falling down the stairs. He didn’t tell her about the foul things his father had said and how he would never forgive him. There was no question of returning to his parent’s home and it was put up for sale. Virinder rented a flat until he could find a new home. Independent in his own right, he didn’t want or need his father’s money. He would have to deal with his parent’s estate but he had his sister, Zita, to help. They had become close. Although he had lost his parents, his bond with his sister and his upcoming wedding helped him heal. They were married in a quiet ceremony and Noor’s father did walk his daughter down the aisle.

Noor

Noor’s breath caught in her throat. Virinder looked so handsome and he smelled amazing as he stood there. After everything he had been through, he was finally looking well. His touch on her arm sent shivers of desire through her. She stared at him intently and hoped their wedding night would be everything he’d hoped for. She was nervous. He turned and smiled and heat pulsed through her. As he ushered her into the car, she placed her clammy palms on her lap. Her heart thumped.

“Noor, I have a surprise for tonight,” said Virinder with confidence.

“Virinder...my father,” she said worriedly.

“I’ve spoken to your father. He has given his blessing and Zita will be with him tonight,” smiled Virinder.

Noor’s disbelief changed to excitement before nerves got the better of her. Suddenly she felt shy.

“I’ve not brought my things,” she said ruefully, looking at her beautiful dress.

“Don’t worry, Zita packed you a bag,” said Virinder kindly. “I’ve arranged private dining.”

Noor gaped at Virinder. His face was assured and smooth. Unsettled, she didn’t reply but nodded. Her emotions were tangled. She wanted this, had in fact longed for it...but now it was happening she was uncertain. However, her body wasn’t. A thrill ran through her; it had been so long...it took her a moment to understand what it was. Since the loss of Virinder’s parents she couldn’t imagine finally being alone with him. However, the look he’d given her earlier had revealed a desire so naked her legs nearly buckled. Noor had not given herself completely to anyone since Ayran. Yes, she’d given her body but never her heart. She had come such a long way since her earlier plans for Virinder. She saw getting pregnant as her only way to secure her future but now everything had changed and she cringed at her callous attitude. She felt so unworthy of his love.

Virinder

He noticed how quiet Noor was, and in other circumstances he’d worry. However, he was not the same man anymore. His grief had been all consuming and he lost himself in the Braille Club in the weeks that followed. He was numb and needed something to help with his anguish. Slowly, the Braille sessions helped him to reconnect with the world and reignite his passion for Noor. Virinder’s desires became stronger; his need to be touched at odds with the requirement not to move. To have one...was to induce the other. He wanted Noor more than ever. He no longer cared about his inexperience or his shrinking body that would take months to tone. He only cared about Noor and being close to her. Through his sessions, he was aware of passion and what it felt like. Noor evoked these emotions…but what did she feel for him? His own words circled his mind. Without love they were lost. History would repeat itself. He would become like his mother and father; except he would turn to food while Noor turned to other men.

They say you are attracted to what you know… but Virinder couldn’t stand the thought he might marry a personality similar to his father. He’d never considered his father’s behaviour because it was taboo. However, he was aware of his indiscretions; heard his mother’s accusations. His father would slam down his fist and she would fall silent. They were miserable together, but would never part. He wanted more from his marriage. He wanted more for his children. His father’s intention was clear now. He’d picked Noor because he recognised in her what he also possessed. Noor would stick with the marriage whatever happened, Virinder saw that now. Poverty and dependency gave her little option.

He owed it to his mother to break the cycle. When Virinder saw Noor’s devotion to her father, he knew beneath her hardened exterior she was good. She had been honest from the start. Her father and Noor came as a package. That was the moment he truly fell in love with her. Selflessness and caring were qualities he admired greatly. Virinder intended to achieve what his parents had not through love. Noor must feel it too, if they were to succeed. He was aware of every nuance of touch. He’d know if she was unresponsive because his senses were honed by experience. He pulled inside the garage and parked. Looping the bag in the back seat in his hand, he saw Noor looking around curiously before he guided her towards the elevator. Inserting his card they were taken to the elite suites. Noor gasped as he opened the door.

“Virinder, this room is beautiful,” she said in awe.

“Please.” He indicated the table that was set.

Noor looked uncertain but sat as he placed the bag down. He delved into it and unwrapped the savoury delights. This time they were made by his sister, he could never eat them again, the memories too painful, but knew Noor loved them.

“Mmmm,” sighed Noor. “Something smells delicious.”

“Do you trust me, Noor?” asked Virinder quietly. Noor would always be difficult to control. Her nature was naturally rebellious and her lack of trust in men would always haunt her, but Virinder felt he understood her.

She turned and gazed at him. “Yes.”

“Close your eyes,” said Virinder. He tore a piece of food. “Open your mouth.” With trembling fingers he pushed the food into her mouth. They both gasped. Virinder’s mind exploded with the sensation of Noor’s soft lips against his fingers. He trembled as the thrill of her mouth lingered. He picked up the next piece of food and fed her. This time his fingers brushed her moist tongue and he shivered with desire. Noor’s eyes flew open. She looked directly into his eyes and he saw desire. He controlled himself with effort, imagining his movement triggering an alarm like in his Braille sessions. Noor was waiting, her eyes wide. Virinder placed the food in her mouth and this time she licked at his fingers, the sensation delicious and erotic.

“Noor,” he gasped. She smiled mischievously at him and opened her mouth for more.

This time she sucked at his fingers and Virinder groaned as yearning ripped through him. He jerked his hand free and without thinking grabbed Noor and crushed his lips to hers. Euphoria flowed through him as she hungrily kissed him back. The kiss deepened quickly and Virinder didn’t want it to stop. He didn’t pull away as Noor moulded her body against his. Passion consumed them. Raw and powerful. Virinder’s heart soared. They were tearing at each other’s clothes; lost to the desire raging through them.

“Noor,” gasped Virinder. “Do you love me?”

“With all my heart,” said Noor impatiently. “

“For the right reasons?” Virinder challenged her.

“Yes,” said Noor passionately. “You did the impossible after Ayran; you made me trust again…I love you for that, and many other reasons.” Her face was defiant and vulnerable.

He knew then he was lost to her. “We’re not alone anymore. We have each other...” he said, his voice cracking. Noor’s lips found his. As they clung to each other, Virinder gave into his desires and as Noor removed her clothes, he was astounded by her beauty. Her passion for him made him forget everything, even his own insecurities. Their desire was inflamed and intense and when at last they were spent, they held each other. Noor sighed happily.

Finally, Virinder felt healed, his sadness for his parents was complicated and mixed with many emotions. With Noor’s love he knew he could be a better man. Noor was a handful but he knew what to do to keep her satisfied. The Braille Club beckoned for both of them and he couldn’t wait for his wife to join him.