The Comeback Kiss (45 page)

He got up, threw on his jeans and T-shirt, and stepped out into the hallway. Both Izzy
’
s and Babs
’
s doors were shut, but the door to the attic was open. Finn ran his hand throug
h his hair and climbed up the first few steps.

“
Tessa?”
he called quietly.

He heard a scuffle and then saw her head poke out into the open stairwell. She grinned and looked down at him, her hair hanging down, framing her flushed face. She looked alive and
happy, and Finn smiled.

“
Come back to bed,”
he said.

She shook her head, and crooked her finger at him to come up, then disappeared again. Finn laughed and started up the steps, knocking his head against the hanging bare lightbulb at the top.

Tessa sat yog
a-style in the middle of the attic, surrounded by piles of open boxes. Random items were spilled out onto the floor. There was a pile of Christmas ornaments, a bunch of straw kitchen matron dolls, a few ceramic cats. Some of it was unfamiliar, and some of
it he recognized as the kitschy stuff Karen had always had around the house. It was funny, because up until this moment, he hadn
’
t realized that it was missing. He sat down behind Tessa, wrapping his legs around her, and picked up one of the kitchen matro
n
s.

“
Hey,”
he said, laughing. “
I remember this lady. She was giving me the evil eye the first time I kissed you.”

Tessa laughed and grabbed it from him.

“
That wasn
’
t our first kiss,”
she said, leaning back against Finn
’
s chest. He wrapped his arms around he
r and lowered his face into her hair, placing one gentle kiss on her neck. “
Our first kiss was at Annie Lateri
’
s birthday party.”

Finn chuckled. “
Who the hell is Annie Lateri?”

Tessa twisted in his arms, looked at him. “
She had a lisp and you used to call
her Annie Lisperi.”

Finn blinked as the memory of a little girl in dark pigtails rushed over him. “
Oh, yeah. I was a little bastard, wasn
’
t I?”

“
Yep.”
Tessa turned back to the boxes, reaching into one. “
The best revenge is living well, though. She
’
s marrie
d to the Vermont attorney general and has a house larger than this town.”

Finn moved her hair out of the way and kissed her neck again, a familiar and not unwelcome pressure building up below.

“
Anyway,”
Tessa said, her voice a little raspy, “
we had our fir
st kiss in her bathroom at her ninth birthday party. Remember?”

Finn pulled back. “
Yeah, but that one doesn
’
t count. No tongue, no play. And I was only ten years old. I didn
’
t have any moves.”

Tessa curled her leg in and twirled to face him, gracefully eas
ing up to straddle him. “
Well, you sure have moves now, sailor.”
She giggled, looking so happy and brilliant, like a fight had turned on inside her.

She was amazing. He pulled her tighter to him, began kissing down her collarbone, pulling back the collar o
f her T-shirt to get at her bare skin.

“
Whoa,”
she said, giving a quick gasp. “
Anyway, I was, uh... oh...”
Finn smiled and pulled back. She opened her eyes and smiled down at him. “
I had a thought.”

“
Forget it,”
he said.

“
No.”
She pushed back off him and
the space between them, small as it was, physically hurt. They only had so much time, and he didn
’
t want to waste a second of it not touching her.

“
I was thinking of putting all this stuff back,”
she said, motioning toward her mother
’
s things. “
Well, some
of it, anyway. And I was thinking I might paint some of the rooms. I think I
’
d like my bedroom to be yellow, you know? Bright. Cheerful.”
She smiled. “
Hopeful.”
She tilted her head a bit to the side. “
What do you think?”

Finn sighed, tried to imagine her b
edroom in yellow, could only imagine Tessa naked on the bed, and that was fine by him. “
I think that would be great.”

“
And I was thinking of maybe starting to paint again, for real. You know, like I used to. Just for fun, I mean, I wouldn
’
t quit my job or
anything, but...”
She sighed, happiness radiating from her face. “
It
’
s just something I
’
d really like to do.”

God, he loved her. Sitting here in this attic with her, talking about these little things... It was such a small moment, just watching her face li
ght up as she talked. If he could do this for the rest of his life, he would.

If...

Her expression darkened, and she tilted her head at him. “
What?”

Finn took her hand and kissed her fingers. “
Nothing. Just thinking about how I
’
m going to miss this. You kn
ow, when I leave.”

Her eyes went hard. “
When you leave?”

“
Well...”
Oh, Christ. She knew. She had to know. Didn
’
t she? “
Yeah, Tessa. I can
’
t stay. You know that.”

She pushed up on her feet and took a step back. “
No. I didn
’
t know that.”

Fuck.
Finn stood up
as well. “
I don
’
t know what to say. I thought we were on the same page here.”

“
Apparently not.”

He could see her lower lip trembling and it made him feel sick and raw. How was it possible to go from feeling so good to feeling so shitty in just a few secon
ds? How did people survive this kind of thing on a regular basis?

“
Tessa...”
he said, reaching out to her. She batted his hand away.

“
No, you
’
re right. I should have known. All that about
‘
I want to wake up next to you every morning and be the man you beli
eve me to be,
’
blah blah blah. I mean who says that? Guys don
’
t say that. Guys like you
definitely
don
’
t say that. Jesus, I
’
m so stupid.”

“
You
’
re not stupid,”
Finn said. “
Now will you calm down so we can
—”

“
What? Talk? Why? So you can feed me more crap abo
ut how you love me, how you want to be with me?”

His chest felt like it was caught in a vise. “
I do want to be with you. God, Tessa, you have no idea
—”

“
Right,”
Tessa said, bitterness cutting through her words. “
You want to be with me, just not enough to
be a real man and actually do it.”

They stared each other down for a long moment, and then she turned toward the stairs. Finn caught her by the arm and pulled her back.

“
So you tell me,”
he said quietly, “
would a real man stay here with you, even if it mea
nt you losing custody of your sister?”
He released her arm. “
Is that what a real man would do?
’
Cause, you know, I
’
m kinda unfamiliar with their ways. Why don
’
t you explain it to me?”

Tessa let out a heavy sigh, but didn
’
t say anything. Finn took a deep br
eath and spoke calmly.

“
What do you think that social worker is going to think if she finds out we
’
re together? I haven
’
t had a real job on paper in ten years, Tessa. How do you think that
’
s gonna help your situation? You think that
’
s gonna look good for y
ou?”

“
I don
’
t care,”
she said, but he could tell the conviction in her voice was weakening. He put his hands on her shoulders. Touching her was both comforting and painful at the same time.

“
You do care,”
he said. “
And I care. And whether we like it or not
, that
’
s the way it is and nothing can change that.”

Gently, he pulled her into his arms, leaning his face into her hair and breathing in deep. He felt a knot of emotion in his throat and swallowed against it as he kissed the top of her head.

“
It
’
s okay,”
he said. “
We
’
ve still got a little time. We haven
’
t got Tarpey yet. Maybe it
’
ll take a while.”

“
That
’
s what you
’
re waiting for?”
she asked. “
Us getting Tarpey?”

Finn nodded. “
I
’
m certainly not gonna leave while he
’
s still out there
—”

She pushed back from h
im. “
Then get your stuff and go”

Her words hit him like a slap. “
What?”

“
Tarpey turned himself in last night,”
she said.

“
Why?”

“
I don
’
t know. Maybe he saw what you guys did to his office and knew the jig was up.”
She swiped at her left cheek. “
I don
’
t kno
w. I went looking for you to tell you, but then we got... distracted and I figured it could wait for morning.”

Finn put his hand on his stomach, which was suddenly killing him. “
Okay.”

“
So, mission accomplished. We
’
re out of danger. And since you
’
ve turned
over this new leaf of nobility, here
’
s how you can be noble, for me. I
’
m going to go skating at the lake, clear my head a bit.”
Her eyes met his and even in the dim light, he could see the tears there. “
When I get back, you can have your stuff cleared ou
t
, and you can be gone. The faster you leave, the faster I get over you.”

She turned and walked out, ignoring him as he called her name.

***

Babs flipped over one last pancake on the griddle. She and Izzy had been happily making plans for Finn and Tessa a
ll morning, since they
’
d noticed Finn
’
s keys and wallet sitting on the table in the foyer, while the sofa was strangely unoccupied. However, a few minutes earlier, Tessa had stormed out, slamming the door behind her, and they
’
d quieted down, waiting for t
h
e second wave from Finn. Even Wallace had gone silent, curling up in the corner like a depressed puppy rather than begging for bacon.

Babs scooped her spatula under the pancake and held it up for Izzy. Izzy shook her head no, and Babs placed it on the stac
k. Footsteps sounded slowly down the stairs, and they heard Finn moving about in the living room. Babs exchanged a look with Izzy.

“
We should probably wait for him to come in here,”
Izzy said.

“
Oh, definitely, we
should
,”
Babs said, “
but we
’
re not going to
.”

With that, they both hopped to it, pushing through the kitchen door into the living room, where Finn was packing up his yellow backpack.