The Deep Blue Sea for Beginners (26 page)

Epilogue

I
l Faraglioni towered out of the ocean, white rocks sparkling in the morning light, one an arched formation with a keyhole opening that boats could drive through, made from thousands of years of wind and waves. Seagulls, terns, and long-legged waders roosted on flat surfaces, and tufts of grass and flowers took root in every shallow crevice.

“Here we are,” Pell called, driving the boat, slowing it down.

Lucy reclined in the stern. Their mother sat beside her, head tilted back as the breeze blew her hair out behind. They all wore bathing suits, knowing that a swim was part of the day’s plan. But for now, they stared up at the rocks, austere and eternal.

It was just the three of them. Travis had stayed in Anacapri, to tour the island with Rafe and Max. David had flown back to London. Lucy knew Travis had offered to come and serve as skipper, but Pell had spent many summers on the water, knew her way around boats. She wanted this trip to be just for the girls.

Lucy gazed at the islands. Max had told her that they were home to the
lucertola azzurra
, a rare blue lizard, the only place it existed in the world. When she’d asked Pell if they could explore the islands, Pell had nodded. This was their time—just for the three of them.

Now Pell cut the engine. She signaled for Lucy to drop the anchor. It went over the side with a splash; Lucy watched it speed down to the bottom, sparkling metal shooting through clear water.

Pell reached into the cabinet under the console, pulled out three net bags filled with masks, snorkels, and fins. Rafe had spoken to Nicolas, helped her find a dive shop, and they’d gotten the gear they needed.

“In all the years I’ve lived here, I’ve never snorkeled,” their mother said.

“Well, you have the garden and sky covered,” Pell said. “Time to check out the ocean.”

“What will we see?” Lucy asked. “Is it like a coral reef, with angelfish, grouper, eels … ?”

“You’ll see,” Pell said. “Starfish.”

Lucy smiled at the nickname. She tugged on her fins, eager to jump over the side. Pell helped her adjust the strap on her mask. Their mother took out her camera, snapped pictures. Lucy was beaming so wide, her cheeks ached. If the trip ended right this minute, she would be the happiest girl on earth.

She gazed at her mother and older sister. They looked so much alike, with identical blue eyes. Lucy leaned over the side, to look at her own reflection in the water and see if she matched up. It was too blurry, but she really didn’t care—she already knew. She was one of them, a Davis woman through and through.

They had come together—a mother and her two daughters—and they would go apart again. When Lucy and Pell returned to Newport, their mother would stay on Capri. It wasn’t life the way anyone would have dreamed it. But people were who they were.

All of Lucy’s 2:01 a.m. sleepless nights had taught her that. She was only fourteen, but she knew things couldn’t be forced. Life had unfolded for her family differently than it had for others. There was so much about it that seemed unfair, cruel, beyond belief. She thought back to Grosse Pointe, to the earliest days, when they’d all been together. If someone had told Lucy that her mother would leave, her father be taken by death, Lucy would have thought it was a wicked fairy tale. Such events were too unthinkable to be real.

Life was a tide, spun by forces too great to be questioned, sweeping in and out. It might be easier to build a seawall of sand, circle the castle, protect the ramparts, than try to alter or affect the tide of life. Lucy’s mother had to stay on Capri. It’s where she gardened, where she lived. Staying here would keep her happy and sane, so she and her daughters could go on. Who knew what the future would bring? Maybe someday they would all live in the same place again.

And maybe not.

Lucy glanced around the boat. Pell was checking the anchor line; their mother was staring at her with such boundless love Lucy thought her own heart might burst. Then her mother looked at Lucy with the same light in her eyes, and Lucy smiled at her. This trip had made them a family.

They might do things differently than other people, but they belonged to one another. They always had, but this summer they’d realized it in a new way. Somewhere in the world it might be 2:01 a.m., but Lucy had a mother. She and Pell had their family back. It was as if Lucy’s mother read her mind: she nodded, resolutely, as if nothing could ever shake her from what she felt, what they all had.

And then it was time to go in the water.

“Ready?” Pell asked.

“Ready,” Lucy and their mother said.

They stood up on the rail, and one by one jumped in, hit the water with a shock. It felt cold at first, but Lucy got used to it right away. They swam in a line, from the yellow boat toward the eroded arch. Sunlight slanted through the rock opening, turning the turquoise water jade green.

Through her mask, Lucy saw sparkles of gold—as if particles of the sun had fallen into the sea, drifting downward. No, they were swimming. Tiny fish! So excited, Lucy pointed. She saw bubbles escape Pell’s mouth, and through the mask her sister’s eyes were smiling.

The three of them swam toward the school of fish. Underwater, Lucy heard her heart beating in her ears; the sound of her breathing was steady. Otherwise the world was silent as they advanced in a line, Lucy between her mother and Pell. They approached the creatures, which were not the fish Lucy had first thought.

“Seahorses!” she said, the word dissolving in laughter and bubbles.

Pell nodded, and their mother stopped swimming. The two girls reached out their hands, and the tiny seahorses swam closer, their fins beating like miniature wings, and they wrapped their long tails around the sisters’ fingers. When Lucy turned, to make sure her mother felt the seahorses too, she saw her mother holding back, just watching.

Lucy looked at Pell, and Pell at her mother. It wouldn’t do for her to be so far away, so the two girls reached out their hands. The seahorses scattered, and Lyra took her daughters’ hands. They held tight for a minute, just treading water. Bubbles drifted up to the surface; maybe into the sky, maybe up to Taylor.

“I love you, I love you, I love you,” Lucy said underwater, talking to her father, mother, and sister.

Then Lucy, Pell, and their mother turned seaward. Still holding hands, they swam in a straight line through the blue water, surrounded by glints of gold, by a thousand seahorses. The tide came in, and the family swam.

Acknowledgments

Deep thanks to Nita Taublib, Tracy Devine, and Kerri Buckley, and to everyone at Bantam Books.

Much appreciation to Andrea Cirillo and all at the Jane Rotrosen Agency.

I’m ever so appreciative to Sarah Walker for every single thing.

Continuing and endless gratitude to Twigg Crawford.

Thank you to Sam Ekwurtzel for a year of art.

I am so appreciative to Jim Weikart for taking such good care.

I am grateful to my sister and brother-in-law, Maureen and Olivier Onorato, for their knowledge of seahorses and love of the sea and all marine creatures.

Peace and love to Jason Hancock and Amy Rhilinger, and the earth-loving Cooper.

Thank you to Pat Peter for her wisdom and generosity, and to the inimitable Emily Goodman.

Endless thanks to Proctor II and its wonderful staff, with special thanks to Dr. Cathleen Gould, Dr. Sherry Winternitz, Toby Hartman, Julie Twohig, Nina McCloskey, Rob Peirce, Paula Burley Maxine Peake, Laura Marble, Erika Skorupski, Deborah Ford, and especially for lending me her guitar, Christina Dafnoulelis.

About the Author

LUANNE RICE is the author of twenty-eight novels, most recently
The Geometry of Sisters, Last Kiss, Light of the Moon, What Matters Most, The Edge of Winter, Sandcastles, Summer of Roses, Summer’s Child
, and
Silver Bells
. She lives in New York City and Old Lyme, Connecticut.

The Deep Blue Sea for Beginners
is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places,
and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used
fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events,
or locales is entirely coincidental.

Copyright © 2009 by Luanne Rice

All rights reserved.

Published in the United States by Bantam Books,
an imprint of The Random House Publishing Group,
a division of Random House, Inc., New York.

BANTAM BOOKS and the rooster colophon are
registered trademarks of Random House, Inc.

LIBRARY OF CONGRESS CATALOGING-IN-PUBLICATION DATA

Rice, Luanne.
The deep blue sea for beginners : a novel / Luanne Rice. — 1st ed.
p. cm.
eISBN: 978-0-553-90674-5
1. Mothers and daughters—Fiction. 2. Psychological fiction. 3. Domestic fiction.
I. Title.
PS3568.I289D44 2009
813′.54—dc22
2009013277

www.bantamdell.com

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