The Deliverer (11 page)
A
S FAR AS I
was concerned, the locusts and the darkness were anticlimactic, if you know what I mean. I suppose the humans might not have seen it that way, but from my perch, it was just one big yawn after the frogs, gnats, boils, and hail. I figured it wouldn’t be much longer before this whole misadventure to try to save the Hebrews, much less the Egyptians, would run out of gas. The Egyptians were not redeemable, and it didn’t look like Pharaoh was ever going to let the Hebrews go. Not today, not tomorrow, not ever.
I wasn’t surprised when God summoned Moses again, but I was baffled by what He said.
“Moses, I will bring one more plague on Pharaoh and on Egypt. After that, he will let you go from here. Tell the people that men and women alike are to ask their neighbors for articles of silver and gold.”
“Like that’s going to happen.” I shrugged. “Why would the Egyptians give the slaves silver and gold?”
Then it hit me. The Egyptian people figured out that Moses had been right every time about what disaster was going to happen next. They had also seen how the Hebrews had escaped every plague that visited Egypt. So, by now the Egyptians were favorably disposed toward the slaves. More importantly, Moses himself was highly regarded in Egypt by almost everyone, including Pharaoh’s officials.
After all, if it hadn’t been for Moses warning the magistrates as well as the Hebrews about the hail, the Egyptians would have been eating hamburger for years from all the dead cows. The people had learned to pay attention to what Moses said, so when the Hebrews asked for silver and gold, they gave it to them. They probably thought of it as a commission, so to speak, or a down payment for future information. They weren’t one bit reluctant to pay Moses for his timely advice. It seemed no one thought about the fact that slaves have no use for silver and gold. What could they do with it? The slaves weren’t allowed to go anywhere but to the brick pits, and there were no boutiques or blue-light specials in that neighborhood.
This could only mean one thing: “The Israelites believe they’re leaving town, and the Egyptians must think so as well,” I reasoned. “They’re packing up because they must know they’re going somewhere.”
I followed Moses as he walked straight into Ramses’ throne room unannounced. He slipped right by the guards as if he’d been invisible. I slipped in right behind him because I was invisible. For several minutes, Moses stood quietly before his childhood brother and stared at him as if trying to find the words to make him listen. How could he make Pharaoh understand the irreversible consequences he was about to trigger if he resisted God one more time? Ramses stared back, and the longer he stared at Moses, the more it seemed that a cold fear rose up in his eyes, but he said not a word.
“This is what the Lord says.” Moses paused, swallowed hard, and then went on. “Around midnight He will go throughout Egypt. Every firstborn son in Egypt will die, from the firstborn son of Pharaoh, who sits on the throne, to the firstborn son of the slave girl, who is at her hand mill, and all the firstborn of the cattle as well. There will be loud wailing throughout Egypt—worse than there has ever been or ever will be again.
“But among the Israelites not a dog will bark at any man or animal. Then you will know that the Lord makes a distinction between Egypt and Israel. All these officials of yours will come to me, bowing down before me and saying, ‘Go. Leave quickly, and let all the people who follow you go with you!’ After that I will leave.”
Ramses didn’t blink; he just kept staring at Moses. When Moses saw Ramses wasn’t going to seize the last chance being offered him, he turned in frustration and left the room. I flew my fastest back to Satan’s lair.
“Is that all He said?” Satan demanded. “You’re certain?”
“I’m certain that’s all Moses said.”
“What about God? You’re certain He said nothing more?” Although Satan grilled me as if he didn’t believe me, he had a strange look in his eyes, as if he was hoping I would say, “Nothing more.”
I’ve learned how to take a cue, so of course I answered, “No. Nothing more.”
But he didn’t stop there. He kept pressing as if I might be keeping something from him.
“Not even an
except for
or an
all but
—nothing like that; no qualifiers at all. You’re sure?” His eyes narrowed as if probing into my mind to see if something else was there.
“No, sir. No ifs, ands, or buts. I’m certain of it.”
I don’t know quite how to describe what he’s like when Satan thinks he’s put something over on God. He danced a sort of jig and made a guttural noise in his throat that sounded something like the noise a cat makes when you try to give it a bath. He jigged all around, poking at me with his long claws as if I were supposed to giggle right along with him. I never really know how I’m supposed to respond to these antics, so I hopped around a little and tried to hum a little tune to go along with the jigging and to appear as thrilled about whatever it was as he seemed to be.
“You don’t get it, do you, moron?” I didn’t need to answer. The sum total of my not getting it was all over my face.
“Don’t you see it? He didn’t give them a way out. He’s getting sloppy. He didn’t exclude the Hebrews. He’s bound by what He said. The firstborn of the Hebrews will die along with the Egyptians.”
“Oh, I don’t think so, sir.” The words went right by the stop sign in my brain and out my mouth before I could rein them back in.
Satan stopped jigging not two inches from my face. I closed my eyes and tried to keep on humming like I wasn’t worried. He didn’t say a word. He didn’t have to. He just breathed on me, daring me to tell him something he didn’t want to know.
“It’s like this, Your Evilness.” I tried not to stutter, but I couldn’t help it. “I mean, it’s like, well, I don’t really know what it’s like, but … ” I grasped for words, hoping to make a complete sentence as he bore down on me. “But I know what God is like. He will find a way to save them.”
“Oh, so now you know what God is like, do you? Has
He
taken you into
His
counsel? Has
He
asked your opinion on anything at all?” He snarled and growled at me at the same time. “Or is there something you forgot to tell me? Some little detail you left out.”
“No, no, sir.” My voice was barely audible.
“If you’re so sure He’s got a plan, get out of my sight and find out what it is. You make me sick.”
As soon as he turned his back, I slunk out and went in search of Moses.
I arrived just in time to hear Moses giving the people instructions to prepare a hasty supper. So hasty, in fact, they were not to use any yeast in making the bread. It was obvious they weren’t going to have time to let it rise. Wherever they thought they were going, they expected to make a quick exit. I followed Moses into another room, where he gathered the men. I must tell you that I wasn’t the least bit comfortable being in the middle of the Hebrews like that. I don’t know what it was about them, but to be honest, I really wanted to run. But I didn’t dare leave without hearing what Moses had to say.
Moses summoned all the elders of Israel.
“Go at once and select the animals for your families, and slaughter the Passover lamb. Take a bunch of hyssop, dip it into the blood in the basin, and put some of the blood on the top and on both sides of the door frame. Not one of you shall go out the door of his house until morning. When the Lord goes through the land to strike down the Egyptians, He will see the blood on the top and sides of the door frame and will pass over that doorway, and He will not permit the destroyer to enter your houses and strike you down.”
When I heard the word
destroyer,
then I
really
wanted to run. I knew Satan would be livid when he heard that this new deal had blood in it, but how bad could it be? Lamb’s blood would be the last thing he would care about once I told him the destroyer was about to be released into the earth realm. We knew all about him all right. He had only one job. He carried out the wrath of God. His authority transcended the realm of humans and demons alike. I flapped with all my might to get back to the den to report what I’d heard.
I tried as hard as I could to get in control of myself and stop trembling before delivering the news to Satan.
“The destroyer is coming,” I blurted out, reaching as high as I could to remind him how big the destroyer was. “And there’s going to be a lot of dead sheep everywhere … ”
Satan stopped me short by slapping my face back and forth like a cartoon.
“Get a grip,” he seethed at me. I settled down except for some minor whimpering.
“Are you telling me that the destroyer is being dispatched from the third heaven to kill sheep?”
“No, no. Well, I suppose he will kill some sheep, but only if it’s the firstborn. But, no, hardly, I didn’t mean that’s his primary purpose. Oh, my, no … ”
Satan slapped me again. “Spit it out.”
“It’s the Hebrews who are going to kill the sheep. Well, not all of the sheep, of course. Just some of them. The destroyer is being sent to kill the firstborn of every household, just like God said.”
Satan cocked his head to one side and waved one of his claws in a circle.
“So, help me out here. God is going to kill people, and the Hebrews are going to kill sheep. This means what to me?”
“Don’t you see?” I was exasperated that he couldn’t see the obvious. “It’s the escape clause in the whole last plague deal. They’ll smear the blood of the lamb on the doorposts of their houses, and the destroyer will see it and pass right over.”
I was about to point out the distinct possibility that the destroyer might not stop with the firstborn of Egypt but might step into our realm as well, but I didn’t get the words out in time. The change in Satan’s countenance silenced me. He stood completely still as all emotion drained from him. I wouldn’t dare say so, but I’m sure he actually slumped, which he would never do in front of one of us.
“They’re going to use the blood of a lamb? You’re sure?”
“Well, I’m sure that’s what Moses said, but who knows how well that idea will really work. It doesn’t seem like much of a deterrent to the destroyer.”
Satan didn’t say another word. He didn’t take a swipe at me as he usually did in circumstances like these. He didn’t jump on my tail as he often did when I brought him bad news. He did nothing. The prince of darkness turned and quietly walked out of his lair.
Not knowing what else to do, I returned to my perch and tried to make the pieces of the puzzle mean something. It was hard to say whether Satan thought the destroyer in the earth realm was the big deal I thought it was. Why had he acted so strangely? All he seemed to care about was the part about the blood.
“What is it with the blood?” I asked myself for the millionth time. If I could just figure it out, maybe I could find a way to … never mind. I looked up toward the third heaven and called out to God.
“God, what is it? What is Satan afraid of? What does he know? Why doesn’t he tell us? Why won’t You tell me?”
God said nothing.
A
T MIDNIGHT, JUST
as Moses said, the Lord struck down all the firstborn in Egypt, from the firstborn of Pharaoh to the firstborn of the prisoner, to the first-born of all the livestock. Pharaoh, all his officials, and all the Egyptians awakened to the massacre as loud wailing broke out such as had never been heard in Egypt. Even to the demons it was chilling. There was not a house anywhere without someone dead in it—except for the houses of the Hebrews.
Pharaoh was beside himself with grief when he summoned Moses and Aaron. He slumped over the body of his dead son.
“Leave us alone. You and the Israelites go, worship the Lord as you have requested. Take your flocks and herds, but before you do also bless me.”
Can you believe Ramses had the nerve to ask for a blessing after he single-handedly brought such devastation on his own people?
The Egyptians urged the Israelites to hurry and leave the country in fear that more death might be coming if they stayed. The Hebrews took their dough before the yeast was added and carried it on their shoulders in kneading troughs wrapped in cloths. Their animals were laden down with the gold and silver of Egypt, and off they went.
It was hard to tell how Satan felt about the exodus of the Hebrews. One moment he seemed depressed, then angry, and finally exasperated. He shifted his eyes to and fro over the ranks of the demons who returned from Egypt and now stood on the rim of the second heaven, awaiting further orders and staring at the parade of departing multitudes. I knew what he was doing. He was looking for someone to blame. For once, I was pretty sure it would not be me.
Finally, Satan walked behind Bezel and half whispered his instructions: “Get them back.”
Bezel raised his great wings and leaned over the edge as if he were about to leap across the chasm that divided our realm from the earth. But just before he took to air, he stopped abruptly, turned back to Satan, and asked the obvious.
“How am I supposed to do that? We cannot touch Moses.”
“Send Ramses after them.”
“Have you seen Ramses lately? He’s a sniveling wreck. Did you hear what he said to Moses? ‘Pray for me.’ He’s so close to repentance. He’s of no use to you anymore.”
“Am I the only one who can think around here?” Satan roared. “
Close
doesn’t cut it with God. Move in. Talk to him about his public humiliation. Turn his grief into revenge. Send the armies of Egypt after the Hebrews. If the slaves don’t turn back, the armies will kill them all.”
I followed Bezel as he flew straight to the bedroom where Ramses lay weeping over his dead son. Hearing loud voices from another room, he decided to check it out before speaking to Ramses. The voices belonged to the financial magistrates, who were dealing with the reality that the entire labor force of Egypt had just left town. Bezel contributed to their confusion by releasing visions of a crumbled economy into their minds. Then he flew back to Ramses’ side and whispered into his dreams. Ramses saw himself publicly humiliated by Moses, removed from the throne, and Moses placed upon it. By the time the magistrates knocked on his door, he was primed. I tell you, that demon was good at his job.