“Perhaps.” He suddenly felt awkward. “But the meanings I heard inside my head might have been little more than my imagination.”
“I …” Soria stopped, still staring. “The woman he was referring to is another shape-shifter,
not
Serena. A matriarch, of sorts. Unsurprisingly, she does not like you very much.” She frowned at Koni and added,
“She should not have known about him in the first place.”
Koni shook his head.
“She has her ways.”
“Who?” Karr growled.
Soria made a low, frustrated sound. “Her name is Long Nu. She is a dragon.”
“A dragon,” he echoed, thinking of his own mother and how only the very stupid ever made the mistake of confronting her. “I assume she wants me dead?”
“She told Koni you had kidnapped me.”
“Because that would be easy,” he said dryly, which earned him a gleam in her eye. “What will he do now, knowing that you are alive and well?”
She translated. Koni narrowed his eyes.
“Are you sure you’re safe with him?”
“Yes,”
she replied firmly, but the shape-shifter shook his head.
“I’m not blind,”
he said, his voice raspy and melodic.
“I saw things in Erenhot, from a distance. I saw how you didn’t run from him when you had the chance, and when I finally was able to contact Roland, he confirmed you had freed him. But that doesn’t mean he’s not dangerous.”
A surprising amount of anger flashed through her eyes.
“Does it bother you, then, what he is? Is that the reason you think he’s a threat?”
Koni gave her a puzzled look.
“What’s that supposed to mean? He’s one of us.”
Soria hesitated. Karr studied the crow’s face for lies, and murmured, “Ask him, then, what he thinks I am.”
“I should be asking how you suddenly understand my language,” she muttered, but translated.
Koni frowned, but now he looked wary.
“Dragon, of course. His scent is odd, but that’s not why I think he’s threatening. Am I missing something?”
Yes, he was missing a great deal—and Karr believed him. He could not be that good of a liar. Even for a crow.
Karr’s hand slipped off Soria’s shoulder, and he walked away without a word. Behind him he heard a slither of voices, followed by the soft, quick tread of footsteps. He tried to ignore them, gazing at the crown of the rising sun. Finding it heartbreakingly familiar.
“He does not know,” Soria said quietly, just behind his shoulder. “He has no idea what you are.”
“Which means that the existence of the chimera has been wiped away.”
“Not for everyone.” Her fingers grazed his arm. “Serena knows. Long Nu.”
“Enemies.” Fear struck him, and terrible regret. The shape-shifters had won the war and wiped his kind away.
If you had only decided to live, perhaps you could have …
He stopped himself from finishing that thought. It was too painful. “If that one over there knew the truth, he would turn against you for helping me.”
“No.” Soria moved even closer, the heat of her body riding over his skin with distracting sweetness. “I trust him.”
“Your trust is not the same as mine.”
“Fine. But whatever you have planned, you will not be able to accomplish it on your own. Not if you want a life after this journey of yours is done. You need help.”
“Not his. I can barely tolerate yours.” Which was a lie. And it was something he regretted saying the moment it slipped from his mouth.
Soria gave him a long, steady look—her silence worse and more damning than any words. When she began to turn away, he grabbed her arm, his fingers loose, gliding down to her delicate wrist.
“You saved my life,” he murmured. “But I ruined yours, I think.”
“No,” she whispered. “If mine could be ruined, it would have happened a long time ago. Nothing you do could be worse than that.”
Soria pulled free. He did not watch her go, but listened to her feet scuff sand, each step loud as thunder in his head, echoing his heart.
“What’s wrong?”
Karr heard the shape-shifter ask, his voice low and filled with concern. Easier to understand him now, with only a slight delay between hearing the words and feeling the meaning splash through his brain.
“Nothing,”
came her short reply.
“What’s your plan?”
“Don’t know. Even when she said you had been taken, I could tell that wasn’t her priority. She was only interested in
him.
She wanted me to follow, find out where he ended up.”
“That’s it? Nothing else?”
“Nothing. Just observation.”
Karr was not surprised. It was a tactic that had been used before. During the war, he had kept survivors of the first massacre well hidden, on the move, until finally settling them in the mountains north of the great plains. Returning from trade missions and hunts had become a tiresome affair, always on the lookout for spies in the skies or forest. Discovering the location of his people had been the first priority of the old queens who had captured him.
Koni hesitated.
“As long as we’re talking about Long Nu’s behavior, I’m surprised that Roland sent you out this way alone. That doesn’t make sense, either.”
Soria said nothing. Karr glanced over his shoulder, only to find her staring at her hand, frowning as if it were marked with blood.
“Soria,”
continued Koni, gently.
“There’s something about that shape-shifter you’re not telling me.”
“You need to contact Roland again,”
she said.
“Go back to Erenhot. Tell him what’s going on. See what he can do.”
“There’s nothing he can do. You don’t get it. Long Nu doesn’t answer to anyone. But all of us shifters? We answer to her, in one way or another.”
“I don’t give a damn. Something is happening here that I don’t fully understand, and it’s ugly and it’s hateful.”
“Soria—”
“We were attacked,”
she interrupted ruthlessly, her voice even more lethal because it was so quiet.
“By men with guns who had orders to take us both alive. And Serena … Serena had him—Karr—in a cage that would have killed him if he changed shape. Immobilized, hooded in iron, strapped to a floor wearing a goddamn diaper. Did Long Nu tell you that? Did Roland?”
Stunned disbelief flickered through Koni’s face. Karr finished turning, allowing his body to finish its final reversion into his human shape. Flesh absorbed scales, revealing the full extent of the sores and welts banded across his throat, chest, hips, and legs. His wrists were red, raw in some spots. Sore and seeping. He had ignored his injuries completely until now—even forgotten them—but he wanted the crow to see. He did not want to give the shifter the luxury of being blind to suffering.
But Soria looked at him sadly, with such weariness Karr found himself striding to her side. He did not touch her, but stood very close, giving her a little of himself. He had done the same for others before battle. Stood at their backs, being a wall. Extending his protection, if only for a moment.
He gave Soria more than a moment. He towered behind her, feet planted, feeling a great and terrible determination swell from his heart to his heels, as though he were growing roots in some invisible earth that was beyond sight, beyond this desert. He was rooting someplace deeper and wilder, where he could still be the man he had been, where he could still do good in honor of the dead … and where maybe, just maybe, it was permitted for him to care for this woman.
Soria’s spine straightened, ever so slightly. Karr gazed over her head at Koni and said, “I am not afraid of his mistress. Tell him that. If this Long Nu wishes to fight me instead of sending her soldiers to spy, I will be happy to oblige.”
“You are asking for trouble,” she replied. “Fighting does not have to be your first choice.”
“You say that now. When they come for you without mercy, you will change your mind.”
Her expression hardened. “I know when to fight. But I believe in options. Right now, communication is your biggest enemy. Everyone had been told one thing or assumed another. No one knows the truth.”
“And you are the master of mine?” Karr asked harshly. “You do not know—”
Soria placed her hand on his chest, stopping him in midsentence. Her touch burned him. Koni tensed.
“There is right and wrong,” she said, holding his gaze with furious intensity. “And there are all the parts in between. I am certain Long Nu has a reason for why she thinks you are a threat. And I know you have good cause to feel the same about her—or any shape-shifter.
I know that.
But there has to be another way.”
Karr covered her hand with his. “Tell him what I said.”
“Soria,”
murmured Koni.
“Looking a little cozy.”
“Shut up,”
Soria replied, still staring at Karr. But, moments later, she translated his message.
Koni exhaled slowly.
“Brass balls, but not much brain.”
“Never stopped you,”
she retorted.
The crow-man gave her a dirty look.
“What has he done to deserve this shit?”
I was born,
thought Karr—and Soria said,
“Answer something: what would happen if you had a child with a different kind of shape-shifter? A dolphin, for example?”
He blinked, staring.
“That would be one fucked-up kid.”
“I’m being serious.”
“So was I. It’s not done. The children don’t survive. Too much stress on the body.”
Soria’s gaze grew cold. Karr remembered that she had shared his nightmare. Seen the fires. Heard the screams. Those children in his care had not survived being born as chimera, that was true. But not because of any sickness.
“Who told you that?”
she asked, her voice deathly quiet.
Koni gave her a wary look.
“It’s common knowledge.”
“Does it happen anyway?”
“No. I told you. No one would risk a child. So we keep to our own, or find mates with humans.”
“This is a mistake,” Karr rumbled, touching Soria’s shoulder. “Do not.”
But she ignored him, and he did not try to stop her. It was wrong, and not something he would have ever contemplated, this invitation to trouble—but he was, despite himself, curious about the shape-shifter’s reaction. He wanted to see what would happen. It would be easy to kill the crow if things went poorly, no matter how much it might grieve Soria.
“This man behind me is a dragon,”
she said fiercely.
“But he’s also part lion. His parents were different. You understand, Koni? Your common knowledge sucks.”
Koni stared at her, and then burst out laughing—a cold, hard sound that was stunned and disbelieving.
“You’re shitting me.”
Karr had never heard so many creative expletives. He held up his arm, concentrating, and scales rippled over his flesh, replaced within moments by fur. He allowed the transformation to continue shifting between dragon and lion, but it took all his concentration to make certain the two parts of his nature remained distinct and recognizable. Sweat rolled down his back, and it became harder to breathe as a great yawning darkness filled his mind, the trembling edge of some chasm that was frighteningly familiar.
He stopped shifting, blood roaring in his ears, sparks in his eyes. Everything seemed too bright to look at, but he forced himself to study the crow’s face, and saw the realization in the shifter’s eyes, the soft horror.
“Fuck,”
Koni whispered.
“Indeed,” Karr replied, hoarse, drawing a worried glance from Soria, who then proceeded to snap her fingers in front of the other man’s face.
Koni tore his gaze from Karr, staring at her, golden light gleaming in his eyes. There was no hate, no rage or disgust, instead only a stunned, careful reaction that was almost as dangerous.
“This is impossible,”
he said.
“You don’t know the half of it,”
Soria replied.
“You need to talk to Roland. These are complicated issues. I don’t think he’s aware of what I just told you.”
Koni wet his lips.
“Long Nu means business. She wouldn’t have gone to all this trouble otherwise. If Roland tries to stop her, it’s going to be war.”
“Just do it, please.”
Koni gave Karr a distrustful look.
“What about you? How will I find you again?”
“Take care of your end. I’ll contact the agency when I can.”
A furrow gathered between her eyes, as though she was in pain.
“Tell Roland I hate his guts, and that I hope he shits acid the next time he’s on the toilet.”
Karr raised his brow in surprise, uncertain whether he had translated correctly. Koni smiled.
“I think I missed you.”
“Right,”
Soria muttered, and kicked dust at him.
“Go on, get out of here. Maybe all Long Nu wants is to introduce herself and sing ‘Kumbaya.’ ”
“Or maybe she hired the men who attacked you.”
Koni spread out his arms, tattoos flexing along his lean, hard muscles which were quickly obscured by the black feathers that rippled from his skin. Golden light rose from him like steam and he added, “I’ll find out what I can.
Hopefully she won’t catch up with me first. In the meantime, be careful. I don’t like leaving you here with him.”
“I’ll be fine.”
Soria’s faint smile did not reach her eyes.
“And just so you know, I think he can understand every word you say.”
“That right?”
Koni’s gaze turned menacingly sharp.
Karr let him look. A crow was nothing to be feared—just bones and feathers, and too much talk. But the change in attitude bothered Karr. He could see it in the other man’s eyes: a different kind of tension than before, as though now Karr was something new and strange, and a more dangerous threat because of it.
Well, he
was
a threat. But it was an odd irony. Soria was right: he was so close to the shape-shifters as to be one of them. But the differences were there. Especially if one looked at only the surface, the combined scales and fur, at the heritage perceived as
wrong.
It was a hard battle to win—impossible, maybe.