The Girl in the Comfortable Quiet (4 page)

They both laugh, but something about their manner
is bugging the hell out of me.

I step out of Jack’s embrace. “I should probably
say hello to Michelle and thank her for all she’s done.”

Linda lets out an exasperated breath. “Crap, what
am I doing monopolizing the guest of honor? We’re going to have plenty of time
to catch up this week.” She turns to my father. “Jack, get your girl out to the
party. But don’t let that bastard Ernie near her.”

Their eyes meet. “I won’t,” he says in a silly,
exaggerated way. “I definitely don’t want you pissed at me. The best part of
the morning was watching you run all over Ernie.”

She arches a brow. “Aha.”

Grinning, Jack shifts his gaze from her, and
before I can try to figure out that one, my dad is guiding me through the
crowd.

We step beneath the tent, and this time, I’m
gratefully swallowed up in the large circle of Stantons. Soon, Jack and I are
both smiling and laughing, trying to keep up with their racing chatter and
festive spirit.

“Chrissie!”

My smile grows enormous and I whirl in the
direction of Mia Stanton’s voice. For a moment my eyes fix on Linda, standing
alone at the edge of the party, her posture a smidge like that of a security
guard and her gaze observing everything.

My heart contracts, though I’m not certain why.
Only the way Linda is watching me makes me sad. Very, very sad.

CHAPTER THREE

I
sit in the passenger seat as Jack slowly drives the last miserably bumpy mile
to my house.

I sneak a peek at him from of my peripheral
vision. This is strange. Really strange. Jack driving me home in my car. Linda
following behind in Jack’s. Wouldn’t it have made more sense for Linda to take
me back up the mountain since everyone after the party made such a fuss over my
exhausted state and none of them wanted me to drive?

Somehow it just sort of happened this way. And
it’s definitely lame to be bothered by it since I really am too tired to drive.
I lean my head against the window. Maybe it’s only because I’m ready to be done
with this day.

“You hanging in there, baby girl?”

The way Jack says that tells me he’s worrying
about me. I’m not sure it’s just about my being pregnant or because I did a bad
job today of hiding how irritated I am with Neil about the Ernie thing.

“Sure, Daddy. I’m great.” I turn my face toward
him and smile. “It was just a long day for me. Kaley and I are not used to this
level of excitement.”

I make a comical face.

Jack laughs. “Me, too.”

I pull down the visor and look in the mirror. I
frown. “Is Linda still behind us? I can’t see her. If she gets lost on the
mountain we may never find her again.”

Jack’s chuckles deepen. “She’s there. The woman
drives like a maniac. I couldn’t shake her if I wanted to.”

His voice is affectionately teasing and my
memories carry me back to the Rowans’ red Ferrari and my drive with Linda in
upstate New York. Then in an unavoidable flow my mind drifts to Alan.

I chase away my wandering thoughts by wondering
how Jack would know that Linda is a crazy driver. I frown. Probably just a
natural assumption given her personality.

My mobile phone starts ringing. I grab it from my
purse and flip it open, reading the caller ID.

Good one, Neil. Call when I’m pissed at you and
trapped in a car with Jack so I can’t get as angry as I want to.

I hit the answer button and put the phone to my
ear. “Hello?”

“How are my girls? How was the party?”

Really, Neil? That’s where you want to start?

“Don’t even try to talk to me. Both of your girls
are pissed at you, Neil.”

A half-nervous laugh. “What have I done now?”

I have to forcibly stop myself from making a face
at the phone. “Ernie. That’s what you did. Don’t play dumb. I know you know
that Ernie turned everything into an overinflated nightmare. And by the way,
your dad wants to know when you became a brand instead of his son. Did you
really say such a conceited jerk thing to your dad?”

“Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. What are you talking about?”

He sounds genuinely confused.

“Chrissie, are you going to answer me?”

I let out a breath. “Ernie Levine turned my baby
shower into a press opportunity. It was packed with photographers. It was
awful. By the way, you owe Michelle an apology after you give one to your dad.
If not for Linda, the party would have been a catastrophe.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?” he asks in
that angry, getting-ready-to-go-off-and-fix-shit tone of voice.

I feel my anger start to wane and I don’t want it
to. But I miss him and his voice sounds so good to hear right now and it’s
always so hard to stay angry with Neil. My still water pond. Always so calming.

“Are you going to explain, Chrissie, or just sit
there breathing into the phone?”

“I’m trying to decide if I’m still angry with
you,” I snap, but my voice is betrayingly soft.

He laughs. “If you’re deciding it means you’re
not still pissed at me. Which is good because I’m really missing you today.”

Damn, now I’m teary-eyed. The guy knows how to
deal with me too well.

“I really am angry about what Ernie did to my
party,” I reply peevishly.

Neil sighs. “I know. You should be. I am, too. I
wanted this to be a good day for you with my family since I couldn’t be there
with you. But I swear I had nothing to do with this. I’ll call Ernie. I’ll fix
it. I’ll make it clear you are off-limits. I know publicity appearances are not
part of our deal. No publicity. I wouldn’t do that to you, baby.”

Crap. Now I’m crying. Crying because I believe
him. Crying because he gets why I feel this way about never being a part of the
publicity, when I hardly had to explain it to him at all before he agreed.
Crying because I yelled at him. And crying because I really wish he were home
right now.

Fuck, I hate that I’m sitting beside Jack getting
mushy on the phone about my private shit with my husband.

I push on my nose to hold back the tears. “I’m
sorry I yelled.”

“Am I still part of our deal?” he teases, his
voice endearing. “Or are you ready to get rid of me?”

A soggy laugh pushes out of me. “I’d get rid of
you, but nobody would take you. You’d just come back. You always do.”

I tense. Shit, why did I say that last part? I’m
relieved when he laughs.

“Yep. That pretty much sums up our history,
doesn’t it? I’m a one-woman kind of guy.”

I arch a brow even though he can’t see me. “You
had better be.”

“Don’t ever doubt it.”

Silence comes through the phone and I can see
Neil in my head, his lush green eyes and gentle smile. I don’t deserve him.
He’s such a wonderful guy.

I stare out the window, getting overly emotional
again. “I’ve got to go. Jack is with me and we’ve just pulled up at the house.”

“Talk to you in the morning.”

I click the phone closed and drop it in my bag.

We pull into my garage.

“Everything all right?” Jack asks.

I give him
the look
. We both know he heard
every word. Lame, Jack. Lame. Sometimes you are not swift at all in the way you
probe me about my life. He’s definitely losing his finesse with age.

“Everything is fine. Neil is going to deal with
Ernie so I’m not bothered again.”

Jack nods. “Good. Don’t let them make you do
anything you don’t want to do. Stick to your guns, Chrissie.”

I frown. Why does he keep telling me that? It’s
almost like something is bothering him, but he won’t say it.

I unbuckle my seat belt and climb from the car
before Jack can get to my door to open it.

“Do you mind waiting for Linda? Settling her in a
guest room? I need to get these shoes off and sit down for a moment and catch
my breath.”

He drops a kiss on my forehead. “Go. Take care of
you. I’ll take care of Linda.”

I hurry into the house, down the hallway to my
bedroom and close the door. Alone at last. I sink on the bed and kick off my
sandals. Those were definitely a mistake. I pull off my dress then reluctantly
rise to my feet and go to a dresser drawer for a comfy, loose-fitting nightie.

I catch a glimpse of myself in the wall mirror. I
pause. Jeez, I’m enormous. I run my palms over Kaley, joy
and
sadness
whispering through my veins. Another month and she’ll be here.

What will I see when I see her? At that moment of
truth, will I finally know for sure
—
I stop myself. I don’t want my
thoughts to go there.

Some things are better left in lockboxes, never
to be retrieved, never spoken of, especially when they don’t matter. Neil and I
are happy. We have no secrets from each other. We have things we do not share
about ourselves, yes, we have that, but in a mutual, caring kind of way. There
are parts of Neil’s past he doesn’t talk about with me. There are parts of my
history I do not share with him. To protect us. Or as Neil says,
part of
loving unconditionally
.
The past doesn’t matter. Not if you love today.
Sometimes Neil sounds just like Jack. Heck, it works for us. And I want this
baby girl more than I’ve ever wanted anything.

I pull on my nightgown, run a brush through my
hair and leave my bedroom. I find Jack and Linda in the family room sitting
side by side on a couch, talking quietly.

“Have you got Linda all settled into a bedroom?”

They both look up as if I startled them.

I sink onto a chair. 

Jack stands up. “I put Linda’s things in the
first bedroom next to yours. I know it’s not a guest room, but I don’t want her
downstairs while she’s staying here. I want her close to my baby girl in case
you need her.”

I roll my eyes at his ridiculous, relentless
fussing over me, and Linda laughs.

Jack smiles at us both. “I should cut out,
Chrissie. You’ve had a long day.”

My eyes widen. “You’re leaving?”

Jack drops a kiss on my head. “You need your
rest.” He laughs. “I need my rest. Christ, I’m going to be a grandfather in
five weeks.”

He says that in a silly way and I laugh.

I struggle to rise from my chair.

Linda springs from the sofa. “Don’t get up,
Chrissie. You’ve been on your feet too much today. I’ll walk Jack out.”

“Thank you, since I don’t think I
can
get
up. I hate this chair. I should never have sat down in it.”

They leave me. I sit there, wondering why it’s
taking so long to hear the door open and close, and for Linda to return. Then I
see something on the coffee table. Crap. Jack’s keys. He’s so forgetful. I grab
them and push myself out of the chair.

In the doorway to the living room, I halt and
stare. Jack and Linda are standing face-to-face, quietly talking.

“It means a lot to me that you did this,” Jack
says earnestly.

Linda’s dark brown eyes are doe-wide as she
stares up at him. “It means a lot to me that I got to.”

They are smiling at each other in a very familiar
kind of way. What are they talking about? They look so serious and something
else I can’t put my finger on.

“Daddy, you forgot your keys,” I say, and they
step back from each other quickly.

Jack laughs and comes to the edge of the landing,
crouching down. He holds out his hand to me. “Why didn’t you just shout for me?
I would have come back and gotten the keys myself.”

His voice is normal, affectionately chiding, but
for some reason he looks a little flustered.

I crinkle my nose. “I was getting up anyway.”

“Jack, stop fussing over the girl. It’s good for
Chrissie to move as much as she can.”

Jack looks at me and nods. “Fine. I’ll stop
fussing.”

I tilt my head to the side, giving him a pointed
stare. “I don’t believe you, but thank you for pretending you will.”

He steps back toward the door, pauses and grins
at Linda. “You’re right. I’m starting to annoy her.”

The room fills with Linda’s deep, throaty laugh.
“See. I’m always right. You need to remember that.”

Jack looks back at me and winks. “Linda is always
right. Remember that, Chrissie.”

I’m not even sure how to respond to that one, so
I smile and Jack finally leaves. Linda closes and bolts the front door behind
him, and collapses back against the heavy wood. She jerks her thumb toward the
driveway. “He’s probably out there listening, making sure I locked the front
door. God, that man worries about you. Sweet, but I can see that it is a little
overwhelming for you at times.”

“It’s overwhelming all the time. I’m surprised he
didn’t spend the last ten minutes telling you how to lock up the house at
night.”

Linda scrunches up her face. “He did tell me. And
made sure I repeated it to him.”

Crap. How humiliating is that? “You’re kidding,
right?”

Linda shakes her head at me. “Stop it. You
shouldn’t be annoyed with Jack. Your father is a wonderful man.”

She says that with an intensity that surprises me
since she hardly knows him.

“You have everything, Chrissie. A gorgeous
husband. Soon a gorgeous baby. An incredible house. An incredible father. And
everyone who knows you adores you. You are a lucky girl.”

The over-the-top compliments take me by surprise.
Why is she being so nice to me?

She comes to me, places an arm around my shoulder
and starts guiding me across the living room.

“I’m so happy I get to spend some time with you.
I really want us to be closer friends. It’s important to me. Especially now.”

The ways she says that tells me she means it. But
the
especially now
part is confusing. Why now?

“Me, too.”

I sink down on a couch. I don’t know what I’m
supposed to do to entertain Linda here. We don’t exactly live similar lives,
even if both of our husbands are musicians. We don’t really have anything in
common except Alan.

Linda looks at me, her eyes bright. “I have news!
Do you want to hear big news or little news first?”