The Heart is a Lonely Hunter (2 page)

Truth be told, there were simply too many guys on Tech’s campus that were interested in her for her to be messin’ around with this low life, thug. She wondered if there was something innately wrong with her. What was it that attracted her to thugs in the first place? Maybe just maybe her mother was right about good girls just naturally attracted to bad boys? Sylvia wasn’t sure about that. But one thing she was quite certain of at this point. She was tired of Chad and his flippant fuckin’ attitude.

Hell, Chad could ruin a wet dream but she’d be damn if she was going to let him ruin her night? After all, the party was in her honor. And Lord knows she wasn’t about to let him rain on her parade. She was going to party like she never had before.
Yessirree, buddy!
The ever so prim and proper, Miss Sylvia Shipp, always so damn correct, always the model citizen was finally going to let her hair down. It was time to let the world know who she really was. She was tired of playing the role while Chad and everyone else did whatever the hell they wanted. Wasn’t it her sorors that were constantly telling her to do just that?
You need to go on and getyo’ groove on, girl! Forget Chad!
Come on and go to happy hour with us. Meet some new guys, some nice guys for a change. And leave the losers and low-life’s for the ho’s and hoochies.

Apologetically, she would decline always citing homework or some prior commitment. The only time she did go anywhere other than to a meeting of this organization or that was when she crossed Lee Street and made her way onto Tech’s campus to see Chad. And then all he did was keep her locked away in his dorm room until she grew tired of his constant pawing and feeling. When she declined his advances, he would leave her for hours with no explanation, only to return later that night high as hell or drunk as a skunk. All too often, he would pass out and she would have to find someone to escort her back to Bennett. Usually, Chad’s roommate, Zachary, would assume the responsibility of walking Sill back to her dorm. And more that once, she had considered asking Zachary in after the long walk. However, she didn’t think it was appropriate. And, though they were friends, it was obvious that Zachary had feelings for her. Besides that, Black people loved to talk.

For four years, Sylvia withstood the ugly, rumors and the never ending gossip that made its way between the campuses of the two schools. Hell, it was enough that she had to withstand the constant chatter surrounding Chad’s late night liaisons. But now in her senior year, she was not about to let such an innocent event as Zachary walking her home at night escalate and evolve into any more than that.

Ever since her freshman year, Sylvia had done her able-bodied best to keep to herself, concentrate on her classes and her grades and for the sake of everyone involved to stay aloof. She was by no means unfriendly, just purposely distant and detached. Statuesque, she seldom wore anything provocative but was content with the subtle earth tones that blended in so well with her dark, brown skin.

For as long as she could remember, Sylvia had always been the focal point. And yet, she had never really grown accustomed to being the center of attention. In her attempts, to spurn the attention and move the spotlight from her, she’d gained the reputation of being pompous and pretentious. Yet, her sorors and a few close friends knew Sylvia to be just the opposite. Easygoing and down-to-earth was how they described her and criticized her constantly for being too nice, especially to that monster, Chad.

Now for the first time in four years, Sylvia had to agree with her sorors. She was
too
nice to Chad and not once did he act as if he appreciated her kindness.
Not once.
Instead, he acted as if she owed him the world just for being with her. To him, she was nothing more than a trophy that he had paraded on campus during their freshman and sophomore years when it seemed the
in
thing to do. Now she was old hat.

Fuck, Chad!
Sylvia said aloud to no one in particular and anyone within ear shot. The two shots of
Courvoisier
she’d guzzled down in her dorm room while waiting for Chad were starting to hit her now while the warm gentle rain found its way around the umbrella and beat against her face. Getting closer to the union, she was glad for the rain that helped mask her burning anger that resulted in a river of tears.

Stopping briefly to wipe both rain and teardrops from her face, she quickly collected herself before joining the party already in progress. Promising herself that this would be a night to remember, Sylvia Shipp entered the student union to the applause and hugs of her sorority sisters. The inauguration ceremony itself took a little less than twenty minutes. When it ended, champagne bottles popped, corks flew and the artist better known as Prince screamed as only Prince can scream.

Out of the corner of her eye Sylvia saw Chad’s roommate Zachary dancing with one of her sorors on the other side of the floor and seriously considered cutting in to inquire about the sudden disappearance of his roguish roommate then thought better of it and joined her partners for a drink. Hell, why should she ruin Zach’s night by forcing him to lie for Chad’s stupid ass anyway? It was, she knew, some unwritten male law that forced them to cover for each other no matter how wrong they were. She never understood it but chalked it up to being some macho thing. Anyway, that’s just the way they were even though she knew Zach didn’t particularly care for Chad or his antics. They just happened to be thrown together when they were freshman and had come to know each other well enough to know that neither of them wanted to go through learning anyone else so they remained together for the past four years and managed to stay out of each other’s way as much as possible. And since Chad was seldom there that just made it that much easier. But it was a known fact that they were as opposite as day and night. Yet, neither would give the other up in a hail of gunfire despite their misgivings about each other. So, there was really no need to ask. Besides that, Zachary looked like he was torn up. Sylvia had seen him drunk before but never like this. He could barely stand. Chuckling to herself, Sylvia grabbed the bottle of
Hennessey
off the table, found a corner of the union not occupied and guzzled freely hoping to reach the same plateau.

Her thoughts drifted. How could she have denied herself for so long? For four long years, she had relinquished all notions of pleasure, seemingly, content to live on the outskirts of campus life. But wasn’t this what every woman wanted? To be wanted, loved, appreciated and more than anything, accepted?

An hour later and still no Chad in sight, Sylvia found herself gyrating slowly to the sounds of Will Downing. Never had she been this drunk or felt this good. She was movin’ now. Groovin’. Climbing on the now empty banquet table, she began a slow, exotic dance. Bottle in one hand, umbrella still in the other, Sylvia Shipp had the floor. Through the mist and drunken fog of liquor, Sylvia could hear the steady rhythmic chant of, “GO GIRL, GO! YOU GO, SILL! GO GIRL!”

For the first time in four years, there was no whispering, no snickering. She felt good, real good, better than she ever had. For the first time she felt accepted and a part of it all and it felt wonderful. And what’s more she not only
wanted
this, she
needed
this. She wondered how she could have possibly denied herself for so long. For four long years, she had relinquished all notions of pleasure seemingly content to live on the outskirts of campus life. But wasn’t this what every woman wanted? To be wanted, loved, appreciated and more than anything to be accepted?

The shouts grew louder. “TAKE IT OFF! TAKE IT ALL OFF!” There was a crowd now but she hardly noticed. Tilting the bottle up she took another swig from the half empty bottle and unbuttoned her blouse. And the more she took off the more the crowd roared. Before long, she was down to her thong. The crowd of students was in a frenzy now, her sorors screaming louder than the guys. “TAKE IT OFF! TAKE IT ALL OFF, SILL!”

Then, not to disappoint, Sylvia Shipp began doing just that. Before she could bare her soul completely, she felt an arm reach out and grab her. There were no words, no arguments, nothing but the raucous boos of those who were dying to see the ever so prim and proper, Sylvia Shipp finally unveil.

She was so drunk that it wasn’t until she was outside of the student union that she realized that she was in no other than Chad’s arms. She could hear him ranting and raving but his words were a meaningless garble. What she did understand was that she had never seen him quite so angry. Not bothering to put her clothes on, Sylvia felt the cold chill of the rain trickling down her back. Chad threw her limp body in the car; bumping her head with such force that she was sure, she was going to pass out.
Damn, it hurt.
Not sure whether it was the bump or the alcohol, Sylvia ignored the pain.

For once, he was the one angry and she was glad. Maybe, just maybe, he did care after all. If he had been there in the first place, this would never have happened. She would have been right there with him, by his side, happy just to be spending time with her man, but no. As usual, he couldn’t find the time to be with her. Of course, he couldn’t let lil’ ol’ Sill, steal his thunder and be in the limelight for once. How could he take a backstage to a woman? Not Mr. Thang! Now he had the nerve to be angry. Sill laughed aloud at the thought, then passed out.

She awoke with a start. Never had she experienced such pain in all her life. She vaguely remembered the car ride she but she did remember Chad telling her over and over that this was a night she would never forget. He’d been angry, angrier than she’d ever seen him in the four years she had known him. She remembered little except for him calling her a cheap ho’ but everything else was so blurred, so fuzzy now.

Suddenly embarrassed, she screamed at him to stop driving so fast and to take her home. And then she passed-out again. When she awoke, this time the pain was too much to bear and she wondered if they had been in an accident. God, how her insides ached. There were people crowded around her watching, staring, laughing. But how could this be? Wasn’t anyone going to call an ambulance? And where was Chad? She hoped he was okay. Sill, felt her legs being lifted, then pulled apart and once again, she felt that same agonizing pain. She tried to scream but there were no words, no sounds, just pain.

Through the haze, Sylvia searched the room for a familiar face, to wake her from this nightmare but recognized no one. She was in and out of consciousness now but each time she awoke, there was another face staring down into hers. She smelled the stench of masculinity and cheap cologne and finally came the grisly reality that she was being raped.

With every ounce of strength she could muster, she fought, but there were just too many. No, this couldn’t be happening. When she tried to scream, someone forced a washrag in her mouth. Unable to move and barely able to breathe, she lost consciousness. Still, she felt the penetrating pain not once but over and over and over.

CHAPTER 2
 

Three days later, Sylvia Stanton regained consciousness in the Intensive Care Unit of the Christopher-Eliot Memorial Hospital. She awoke screaming. A nurse arrived quickly to increase the morphine drip from the I. V., which hung next to the bed. And though in pain most of the pain she felt was not of a physical nature. The medical team that admitted her diagnosed her as having suffered extreme trauma to the pelvic area and internal hemorrhaging. X-rays showed an inflamed uterus and ruptured ovaries but the full extent of the damage could no be determined from the X-rays alone.

Mr. and Mrs. Shipp stood anxiously awaiting word of their daughter’s condition and though both were exhausted, they refused to leave their only daughter’s bedside. The fact that they’d come to learn that date rape was not uncommon among young women did little to stem the shock they felt upon learning of their daughters’ plight.

“Mr. Shipp, my name is Dr. Reid and I’m one of the members of the hospital’s trauma team. It looks as though your daughter was in a pretty bad accident. I haven’t really had a chance to thoroughly go over her charts but I see she’s regained consciousness and that’s a good sign. I also received her X-rays and can see that there’s a fair amount of hemorrhaging around the ovaries but they’re so much blood and swelling around them that at this time that the X-rays are in and of themselves, pretty inconclusive. Right now, the best thing we can do is just sit tight and wait until some of the swelling goes down. Right now she’s stable and for the time being that’s about as good as it gets.”

Grimacing, Mr. Shipp put his arm around his wife’s shoulders to comfort her. He was certainly hoping for the best but clearly expecting the worst. Dr. Reid continued: “What we may need to do is go in and do some exploratory surgery to see how extensive the damage is and to see if we can save the ovaries. If, however, we find that they’re too badly damaged and cannot stop the bleeding then we may have to remove them. This would ultimately mean that Sylvia would not be able to bear children. Now, as time is of the essence and for fear of being blunt and perhaps in your eyes somewhat unfeeling I’m forced to cut through the chase and in lieu of proper protocol and good manners what I need from you two at this point is your consent for us to operate.” Dr. Reid handed Sylvia’s parents the necessary consent forms for their approval.

“We understand but is the operation safe, doctor?” Mr. Shipp inquired timidly.

“It’s a pretty simple and a very common procedure, Mr. Shipp. I’m sure you’re familiar with a woman having her tubes tied or a partial hysterectomy where the ovaries are removed. It’s really no more than that. Actually, the operation is really no more serious than a child having his or her tonsils removed. The biggest factor in a situation like your daughter’s is how well she will adapt—or perhaps I should say recover, knowing that she will never be able to have children.

Her recuperation will depend a lot on the support she gets from you guys but from what I’ve seen of the Shipp family, I’m sure she’ll have more than enough support to pull her through. And, despite the trauma your daughter has suffered, she seems to be fairly strong and healthy so there really shouldn’t be too much to worry about. However, with the internal bleeding, we do need to get started as soon as possible.”