The Ins and Outs of Gay Sex (24 page)

Figure 6.
2:
Penis Piercings

The first Prince Albert I saw was huge—we’re talking loose-leaf binder material—and only one thought came to mind:
How ever did he get on an airplane?
Not to worry.
I’ve been assured that the average ring will not set off most airport metal detectors.
But be prepared to explain if they check you with one of the handheld models!

An ampallang and apadravya are other common penile head piercings.
For an ampallang a rod is passed through your glans from side to side, missing the urethra.
The apadravya spears your urethra while piercing the glans from top to bottom.
(Beware of the sprinkles with this one too!
) (See
Figure 6.
2
.
)

Penile piercing does not mean you have to abandon safe sexual practice.
Condoms must be a little larger, and avoid ultra-sheer styles, which break easily as they slide over jewelry.
Be extra sensitive to your partner’s needs, because metal is clearly not as soft and pliable as your penis.
Your partner may have difficulty accommodating a large ring (fold it to the side of your shaft), and it can tear his delicate anal lining.
And don’t forget about his mouth—no one likes chipped teeth!

If your partner did not already know you were pierced, he may be put off at the sight of your love tool impaled with a metal bar or ring.
He might also worry about hurting you if he touches it.
A little caring and time spent teaching him about pleasures you derive from your piercing go a long way in keeping him around for a good time.
Who knows, your barbell might just tickle his fancy.

Infection is a major risk of piercing but usually can be treated with diligent hygiene.
Rarely are antibiotics necessary.
As with any medical problem, don’t delay seeing your doctor if you think something is wrong.
This is no time for embarrassment—and I guarantee you’re not the first person your doctor’s seen with a piercing.
(He may even have one himself!
) I treated a patient who waited so long that a penile abscess developed from a poorly placed direct spearing of his shaft.
His infection required surgical drainage and left him with a badly misshapen tool.

Urinary tract infections (UTIs) are also more common anytime you pierce your urethra, because the metal ring or bar harbors bacteria.
The major symptom of a UTI is burning with urination (dysuria).
Blood also may be present.
If you develop a UTI, antibiotics are necessary.
If you ignore the problem, you can become quite ill.

Bleeding, a rare complication of piercing, usually stops with gentle pressure.
A nasty rash frequently signifies an allergic reaction to your jewelry.
Most piercers recommend surgical-grade stainless steel or titanium bars and rings.
Never choose silver, because it is too reactive.
And any queen knows that platinum and gold are never a problem!

If someday you need surgery, take out your body jewelry—and not because of medical homophobia.
During most operations doctors use electric current to stop bleeding.
There is a chance that your metal jewelry will conduct current and burn your penis, nipple, or anything else that’s pierced.
If your surgery is short, and you’ve worn the ring for a long time, removing it is not a problem.
If your piercing is fresh or you don’t expect to put the ring in right away, exchange it for a piece of nylon thread.
(Most piercers will do this for you.
) Nylon will not conduct electric current and still keep your tract open until you’re ready to wear your diamonds.
If you leave a tract empty, it may close.

A gentle curve in an erect penis can be normal, but when severe (bent spike syndrome) it causes painful erections and prevents intercourse.
Flaccid, your penis appears normal, but when hard it curves upward (occasionally downward or to the side) to as much as 90 degrees because scarring prevents erectile tissue from expanding.
A hard knot of scar usually can be felt just beneath your skin.
This condition,
known as Peyronie’s disease after the French physician who discovered it, is thought to result from penile injury (bending or snapping an erect penis).
If your curvature is minor and sexual function normal, leave it alone.
Some physicians report successful scar softening and straightening from a variety of nonoperative therapies, including vitamin E, Potaba, nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory medications (NSAIDs), or steroid injections directly into the scar.
If the problem is severe, surgery can correct the problem.
A word of advice:
If your penis begins to curve, see a urologist.

Priapism is an erection that just won’t quit, and though it sounds like a dream come true, in actuality it is quite dangerous.
The erection is not related to ongoing sexual stimulation and does not subside after ejaculation.
Blood in the erectile tissue cannot get out, so your penis stays hard.
Severe pain results when fresh oxygenated blood cannot enter your already too-full penis, and the penis literally suffocates.

Although priapism can happen at any age and often for no apparent reason, certain conditions are often associated with it.
Most commonly they are diseases that affect blood circulation, including sickle-cell anemia or sickle-cell trait (seen mainly in blacks) and leukemia.
Medications linked to priapism include pills for blood pressure control, antidepressants, and other psychoactive drugs.
Illicit drugs (cocaine) and alcohol have also been associated with priapism.

A growing cause of priapism among gay men is their abuse of medications used to treat impotence.
(See
Chapter 7
.
) Viagra, the most common and available in tablet form, stimulates filling of the erectile tissue.
Other similar medications are injected directly into the penis or taken in suppository form.
For men with impotence they can be lifesavers; for normal guys just trying to stay harder longer they spell disaster.

Improperly used cock rings also cause priapism.
Placed
around the base of the penis and scrotum to prolong erections and heighten sexual pleasure, they act like tourniquets keeping blood from leaving your penis.
Choose your cock ring carefully—preferably one that opens, because it is less likely to get stuck and can be removed even if your erection doesn’t subside.
Cock rings also must be properly sized.
Sure, a tight one creates a more pronounced bulge in your jeans, but it may not come off once you’re hard.
One that stays on when you’re soft yet slips off or unsnaps easily when you’re hard is ideal.
If blood can’t leave your penis, priapism or even gangrene can develop.

A friend of mine once treated an exotic dancer who worked gay bars.
Realizing his tips were directly proportional to the hardness of his dick, he augmented his income by tightening a leather strap around his “talent” so he could stay hard for three to four hours.
All was fine until he worked a double shift … and ended up in an emergency room with a purple penis.

Although priapism is a true emergency, most men delay treatment until they can’t stand the pain any longer.
Can you imagine explaining to some triage nurse that you’ve come to the hospital because your erection won’t go down?
But guess what—any nurse with a grain of experience has seen patients with priapism many times before and understands the pain you’re in!
So put on a pair of baggy shorts and hold anything you want in front of your bulge—just get to an emergency room!

Doctors treat priapism by putting a needle into the swollen penis to wash out stagnant blood.
Medications that constrict arteries (epinephrine) are also injected to keep more blood from rushing in to fill the spaces.
Surgery is rarely necessary.

Although doctors usually are successful in getting your erection to subside, often the damage has already been done.
Unless priapism was promptly treated, chances are
great that your erectile tissue was injured by the extreme pressure and lack of oxygen.
Scarring occurs, leaving your once-spongy erectile tissue rigid and incapable of expansion.
Impotence can be the end result.

Direct injury to your penis, whether bent, bitten, or beaten, can occur during rough sex.
I have seen a Prince Albert ripped right through a man’s glans, and he needed emergency surgery.
Some men also try heightening sexual pleasure by passing objects into their urethra.
Forget about it!
This is not the way to stiffen your erection or increase pleasure.
I have seen everything from pencils, pens, and swizzle sticks to glass beads and buckshot removed.
Even if you put something in and were fortunate enough to get it back out, you probably tore your delicate urethra in the process.
Although your urethra can heal on its own, there’s always a chance you’ll require surgery.
Years later, long after you’ve forgotten any pleasure the episode brought, you might find yourself unable to urinate because a urethral stricture (blockage from scar) developed.

And what if you lose your grip and the toy passes farther up your urethra to your bladder?
You will need surgery to remove it.
One surgeon told me about a guy who put piano wire into his penis (maybe he wanted to hear music when he came), and it ended up knotted in his bladder.
The surgeon couldn’t get it out through a scope, and the man had to have his bladder cut open.

Skin disorders anywhere else on your body also can involve your penis.
If you have psoriasis on your elbows, you can get it on your penis.
But before you go down on a scaly red penis, be sure the guy doesn’t have something else.
Cracks in his penile skin make transmission of HIV and other STDs more likely.

Abrasions or superficial cuts are also possible—especially after oral sex or frottage (dry humping) when friction injures penile skin.
Cleanse your cut or injury several times a
day with a mild antibacterial soap—and leave it alone while it heals!

Phlebitis (blood clotting in veins) also can involve your penis.
The condition, known as superficial thrombophlebitis of the dorsal veins, usually results from vigorous oral sex.
(Try saying that with a banana in your mouth.
) You feel a tender, hard red cord running along the top of your penis.
Swelling is also commonly present.
Fortunately, treatment is simple—aspirin, warm compresses, and rest (your dick).
It usually clears in six to eight weeks.

I had been called to the emergency room to evaluate a young man complaining of a “facial abscess.”
All he had was a tiny zit on his forehead.
I couldn’t believe he had waited four hours to be seen for something as insignificant as acne, and I said as much.
The guy (he was quite hunky) turned beet red and blurted out, “I’m really here because I’ve got welts all over my dick!”

Horror of horrors, it
is
possible to get welts (hives) on your penis.
The most common cause is an allergic reaction to something you’ve rubbed it on.
Men can be allergic to rubber condoms or spermicide placed in them.
Some guys are allergic to lubricants or their additives (particularly oily hand creams).
Topical anesthetics used to delay ejaculation are also frequent irritants.
(See
Chapter 7
.
) Allergies to antibiotics and other medications can cause penile hives, but usually you have them on other parts of your body as well.
Some men are allergic to vaginal secretions, but we won’t go there—not in this book.

Another common cause for penile swelling and welts is trauma during sex.
A condom that is too tight—not necessarily because of size but because a vacuum forms near the tip—won’t slide.
If you feel this happening, put extra water-soluble lubricant inside your condom.
Rubbing your penis too hard (whether with a hand, mouth, or anus) can
cause a mild injury.
Your erection doesn’t go down in a uniform way and welts develop.
This is not the same condition as priapism and usually subsides on its own.
This was actually why the young man I saw in the ER had a swollen penis.
I reassured him that, during sex, slow and easy was just as effective as bang, bang, bang.
He blushed again and turned away, saying, “But I was on the bottom!”