The Outlaw Takes A Bride (The Burnett Brides) (31 page)

Hurriedly, she dressed, putting on her best blue muslin. She splashed her face with cool water and then gazed out the window at the morning sky. It was a breathtakingly beautiful morning, and she couldn’t stand the thought of being away from Tanner for another moment.

She opened her door and glanced up and down the hall before she hurried to his bedroom. Travis and Rose’s room was directly across the hall from Tanner’s, and she wondered why they had not awakened last night during Tanner’s nightmare.

Beth knocked softly on Tanner’s door. There was no response. She tapped again; still no response. Finally, fearful of being caught standing in the hall outside his room, she pushed open the door and went inside.

She stood frozen, looking into the room as her eyes took in the emptiness. His clothes were gone, his toiletries had disappeared, the bed was made, and the room was tidy. Everything of Tanner’s was missing.

Her hands began to shake as she walked into the room and sank down on the bed. She took a deep breath, trying to still the trembling that rocked through her. A niggling sense of doubt told her to run and check the house, the barn, everywhere he might have gone to, but somehow she knew instinctively that he’d left.

Probably not long after he’d carried her back to her room, he’d stolen away in the night.

A tear ran down her face, then another one, until they were streaming down her cheeks. She sat on the bed remembering the night before, the feel of him, the sharing of their tainted pasts. Last night had been a joining of their minds and bodies, and yet the morning light found him gone. Her heart felt as if it would burst from the pain.

Why would he leave after everything they’d shared? Why would he go? She didn’t understand. She put her face in her hands and cried. Once again she was alone.

For several minutes she let the tears flow down her cheeks, releasing the heartbreak that threatened to overwhelm her. Everything had changed in the space of twenty-four hours. Still, she could not marry Tucker, but now she had no future, no place to go.

This time she’d made the worst mistake of her life. She’d fallen in love with a man who was wanted by the law, who had been missing to his family for years. This time she’d chosen a man who could never return her love, never marry her and give her the home and family she so desperately wanted.

She’d made some lousy decisions in her life, and suddenly, for the first time, she decided to take control of her destiny. Yes, she’d come west looking for a husband but she was no longer going to depend on a man for her future. She was going to make it on her own. She had a little money from the sale of her jewels in San Antonio. She would take that and find her own way in the world and without the aid of a husband or a father.

The sound of the door pushing open startled her. She glanced up, only to find Travis standing in the door. He didn’t appear surprised to find her in Tanner’s room.

“Where’s Tanner?” he questioned.

She sniffed and wiped the tears with the back of her hand. “He’s gone.”

“Gone? Where?”

“I don’t know. But his things are missing, and I haven’t seen him,” she said, sobbing.

Travis cursed and walked through the room in shock. He glanced at Beth, suspicion darkening his eyes. “Are you all right?”

“Yes. What’s wrong? Why are you looking for him?” Beth asked, sniffing.

“Rose is sick, and I wanted to see if he would go into town and get the doctor.”

“What’s wrong? Is she going to be okay?” Beth asked. “If it’s what I think, she’ll be fine in about seven months,” he said with a smile.

“Oh, my God, how exciting,” Beth said, trying to ignore her tattered feelings for just a moment. Being part of this family felt so natural, so right, yet she had to give it up.

“Don’t say anything just yet. We don’t want to tell Mother until we’re sure. She will be so disappointed if it’s something else.”

“Congratulations! I’m so happy for you both.” Beth smiled up at him through her tears. “Travis, I need to speak with Tucker this morning, and then I’ll need a ride into town. We can contact the doctor and ask him to come out to see you and Rose.”

“Thanks. Uh, I think I know what you’re going to say to Tucker, and Beth, I’m sorry for what’s happened.”

“Thanks, Travis.” She shrugged, trying hard not to start crying again. “I better go find him so that we can get started.”

***

Tucker was sitting downstairs in the kitchen, sipping a cup of coffee, when Travis and Beth came down the stairs together. He had stayed the night before and was going back to town this morning. One glance at the look on their faces and he knew something was wrong.

“Good morning,” he said, hoping to receive some kind of reaction that would alert him.

They both glanced at him, and then Travis went to the cupboard and took out two mugs. He walked to the stove and poured them each a cup of coffee, then handed Beth her cup.

“Everyone is up early this morning,” Tucker said trying to ease the tension he could feel permeating the room.

“Tanner’s gone,” Travis announced.

“What?” Tucker said. “When did he leave?”

“Early this morning,” Beth said.

Her eyes were red and puffy. She looked as though she’d been crying.

“Is he coming back?” Tucker asked.

“No one knows,” Travis said. “He left without telling anyone good-bye.”

“Well, hell, I didn’t think he would do this to us a second time,” Tucker said, clearly angry. “Have you told Mother?”

“Not yet. Rose is feeling poorly, and I was going to see if, when you went into town, you’d have the doctor come out.”

“What’s wrong with Rose?”

“Well . . .” Travis grinned. “Don’t say anything to Mother, but I think we’re about to make you an uncle.”

Tucker smiled and reached over, clasping his brother’s hand. “Congratulations. Now maybe Mother will get off my back for a while.”

Tucker quickly glanced over at Beth, suddenly aware of what he had just said.

She glanced at him, a rueful expression on her face. Travis suddenly headed for the door. “I better get back to Rose; she’s having a rough morning.”

He hurried out the door, and they heard his boots clumping up the stairs to the room he shared with Rose.

Beth sat staring out the window, her coffee cup in her hand. “Tucker, there’s something I need to tell you.”

Tucker stared at the woman, her voice was uneven, and she kept blinking her eyes as if she were trying to hold back tears.

She turned to face him and sipped from her coffee. “I know that you and I had agreed I would come to Texas and if we got along, we’d get married. But I can’t marry you, Tucker.”

He stared at her and sighed relief filling him like a breath of fresh air. He smiled. “I know.”

“You’re a nice man. You wrote beautiful letters, and at the time I thought it could work out. But now it just doesn’t feel right.”

It was all he could do to act saddened when all he felt was relief. “I understand. But what will you do?”

“I don’t know yet, but I can’t stay here.”

“Stay here until you know what you want to do, where you want to go.”

“I can’t stay. Look, I never meant to hurt you. But it was almost as if after we met, we didn’t belong together. The letters that you wrote didn’t seem to fit you.”

Tucker took a deep breath. He had to tell Beth or feel guilty the rest of his life regarding her.

“I didn’t write those letters,” he said watching her eyes widen in surprise.

She swallowed then looked at him, astounded.

“What do you mean, you didn’t write them? Who did?”

Tucker grimaced, afraid of Beth’s reaction when she learned the truth. “At the time, Mother didn’t think that Rose and Travis would ever get together. So she started trying to find someone for me. Mother wrote the letters.”

“What? Your mother wrote to me and signed your name?” she said, her voice rising. “I left my home, sold all my possessions, and traveled all this way because of your mother’s letters?”

He didn’t know what to say. “She wants her sons married. And she’ll do whatever it takes to get them hitched.”

“How could she lie to me like that? I came here because of what was in those letters.” Her voice rose, and her pale face was suddenly flushed.

“Sometimes Mother doesn’t think things through. She doesn’t mean to hurt people, it’s just that her children are the most important people in her life, and she’d do just about anything to see them happy.” He rushed his words, trying to quell the anger he could see rapidly filling Beth’s face. “To her way of thinking, nothing could be better for you than marrying one of her sons.”

“But what about my feelings? I traveled here to marry a man who I thought wanted me.” Her eyes suddenly lit up. “You didn’t want to marry me, did you? That’s why you’ve been so distant. I didn’t understand why you seemed so detached, so unapproachable. I couldn’t understand why you didn’t want to kiss me. Now I do. You didn’t want to marry me!”

Tucker suddenly felt ashamed, though he knew he hadn’t meant to be a part of this fiasco. “I ... I didn’t want to hurt you, Beth. You’re nice, but I’m just not the marrying kind. We just weren’t right for one another.”

“You’re so right. We were never meant for one another, and I would have known that if you had written the letters.”

She stood up, her hands gripping the back of the chair. “I sold everything in the house that I could. I left everyone I knew behind to come out west and start again. Now I have nothing. I would have been better off if I’d stayed in Georgia.”

“I’m sorry,” he said, but his apology seemed weak compared to the huge injustice that had been done to Beth. “What are you going to do?”

“Just take me into town. I can’t stay here any longer,” she said, her voice choking.

Tucker watched as she left the room, her skirts swishing as she walked out the door.

She was right. They had done Beth a terrible disservice.

Hot tears pricked Beth’s eyelids as she ran up the stairs. She had to get away before she broke down completely in front of Tucker. Eugenia had sent the letters that were so warm and touching. She’d written anecdotes about the family and the ranch that made Beth think this was where she belonged, that here, in this family, she could find happiness once again and that the man who would be her husband would welcome her with open arms. Instead, the man she was to marry didn’t even want her.

Everything had been a lie. Eugenia had purposefully tricked Beth into coming to Texas to marry her unwilling son, though Tucker didn’t want to marry. No wonder he’d seemed so cold.

But even worse, she’d fallen in love with Tanner, not Tucker, and he didn’t want her, either.

Beth had hoped for a new start in life, only to find out that even here she wasn’t wanted. There was no place in this world where she was welcome, where she felt wanted and needed. And no one cared whether or not she took her next breath.

Tanner had left her without a word this morning. The dreams she’d spun about them the night before were just fabricated lies that lovers whisper in the night. Tanner obviously hadn’t even been able to face her in the predawn light and tell her good-bye. He’d simply vanished, leaving her behind to face the day.

Tucker didn’t want to marry her; he’d only been acting on his mother’s wishes, and even then he’d had no intention of following through. While part of her realized she should be grateful, part of her was angry and felt that she’d been tricked.

Then there was her past. She’d sacrificed herself in order to preserve the family home, only to be scorned and rejected by her parents and the rest of her meager family, who had been ashamed of her efforts to save their home.

No one wanted her. She had no place to go.

Tears ran unchecked down her face as she threw her clothes into her valise, not caring whether they would wrinkle. A sob escaped her, and she fell to the bed and cried heart-wrenching sobs. She was completely alone, with barely enough money to get herself out of town. She had fallen in love with a man who was wanted by the law, who had left her to marry his brother.

Beth was determined to get out of Fort Worth and leave the Burnett family behind. To stay and face them day after day, to be reminded that she was not wanted, would be impossible. Tears flowed unchecked down her cheeks, soaking the bed with the evidence of her pain. She cried heartrending sobs for the man who had ridden off and left her.

Finally, after several minutes, the tears ceased, and she lay there realizing nothing had changed. Only her eyes and nose were now red and swollen, and her heart felt lighter, though still fractured.

She sat up and dried her eyes. She had survived the war, the public humiliation of her friends snubbing her, the death of her parents, and the end of her dreams. She would survive this, too.

A husband had been a means to fix her financial situation, to change her reputation, but maybe she just needed to be alone, to go somewhere and start new, with no connections, no ties to the past.