The Passionate Love of a Rake (15 page)

She turned towards him, to watch him better, and tried to unravel the puzzle that was Robert. She knew he wasn’t concentrating on the tightrope walker. His thoughts were somewhere else. He’d not shown any tendencies of his youth tonight. He’d been witty, pleasant, entertaining, but never truly sincere, not since they’d kissed. The old Robert was in retreat behind the solid, insurmountable wall of charm he’d built for his defence.

She smiled, absorbed in his sober expression and his familiar profile. The way his hair, in a Brutus cut, swept a curl or two across his collar and hung over his brow. Had he meant his proposal, or was it a joke? He’d said he wasn’t known for his seriousness. Did that mean for his lack of sincerity, too? She’d taken it for a joke. She didn’t dare risk thinking of it as anything else. How could she accept him, even if it was real? Pain lodged in her chest at the possibility of being forced to reject Robert again.

“You’re staring, Jane. I believe one’s eyes are supposed to be upon the entertainment.” He spoke without turning, and yet a rakish smile twitched at the side of his lips. The wolf. Barrington, the soulless rakehell. That was the Robert of tonight.

“I’m caught out,” she whispered.

“Indeed, you are.” His head turned and his gaze met hers. She still stared, smiling and studying the contours of his face.

“Your Grace?”

The smile instantly fell from her lips, and her heart thumped harder. She turned immediately, standing up as she moved. Robert stood, too.

What on earth was Joshua doing here? What had he seen? Of course, he knew none of her history with Robert, but even so, anyone, anything, anywhere near Joshua was in danger.

“You will, of course, dance with me.”

Jane felt herself blanch and lowered her head as she dropped a restricted curtsy, deliberately but surreptitiously insulting him.

What could she do? She’d rushed into giving up her mourning, engrossed in thoughts of dancing with Robert and desperate to be free of the cage Hector had built about her during his life, only to forget entirely the cage he’d forged for her on his death. She’d played directly into Joshua’s hands. He could approach her now whenever he liked. She could not say no without making a scene, and she refused to have her humiliation known, especially by Robert. Robert moved to her side in a possessive, protective gesture.

“Of course,” she answered, her voice wooden.

She did not look at Robert, but moved forward. What would he think of this? Everyone knew Joshua disapproved of her.

Joshua offered her his hand. She took it, a tattoo drumming in her chest as his fingers gripped hers.

They walked from the shallow steps of the supper box to the dance floor, and she felt Robert’s gaze on her back. Somehow, she knew he was still standing.

The music suddenly changed tempo to a waltz. “I asked for it,” Joshua whispered against her ear. A shiver ran the length of her spine.

Robert watched, unmoving. He’d seen Sutton’s wife cut her in the park. He thought he’d rationalised it. The son of the deceased Duke had disapproved of such an obscene age gap between his father and his stepmama. Sutton had made no secret of that in the years Robert had been back in England, and certainly, he must dislike Jane inheriting the old man’s money.
But this?

Robert’s eyes followed them across the dance floor.

She was stiff, uncomfortable, no longer the carefree, laughing girl of an hour ago.

Sutton’s wife cut her. Sutton did not. Sutton danced with her on the first opportunity that arose. There was only one conclusion a man could draw from evidence such as that.
Hell
. Robert did not want to accept it, but it made sense. It would explain why she kept refusing him. “
I cannot.
”

It was Robert’s turn to stare at her. He leaned a hand on the rail of the supper box. He could not see Geoff and Violet among the dancers. They’d probably slipped off to seek private entertainment. What hour was it now? One, perhaps two. Pulling out his pocket watch, he clicked it open. It was one-fifteen. His gaze returned to the dancers. He could no longer see Sutton and Jane. They’d disappeared.

His breath quickened, and his heart picked up its pace. He felt strangely suspended as he descended the steps. He looked left and right then chose the promenade path leading towards the river. The area of pathways there were the darkest and particularly known for offering privacy.

By the time he reached it, he was moving at almost a run, his stride hard and sharp, crunching on the gravel, his heartbeat the only noise he could hear.

He found them in minutes, in a darkened stone alcove hidden in the hedge. It was Sutton’s voice which carried, although Robert hadn’t caught the words. Jane was pressed back against the stone. Sutton leaned to her ear. His hands gripped her shoulder and her arm. Robert couldn’t move. He actually felt the moment his heart splintered. He was suddenly intensely cold. She was doing this to him again. The woman he’d known and loved
was
a bloody fake. His imagined Jane was not capable of this. This was her husband’s son! No wonder Sutton’s wife had cut her. Robert’s Jane did not exist. The fiction he’d mourned was gone. This was the truth.

Thank God. I am free of her now.

She saw him and he viewed both the scene and himself from afar.

When her eyes fixed on his face, he saw horror in her expression then watched her fight free of Sutton’s grip.

Suddenly released from his transfixion, grimacing in disgust, he turned away, leaving it all behind.

She was upon him in a moment, her fingers clutching his arm. He shrugged her off, neither slowing nor reducing his strides to allow her to keep up. He had no wish to hear her explanations. He did not want excuses.

“No! No! You will not do this to me again! Robert! You do not understand! Please! It is not as you think!”

The anger, the hurt of years roiling inside him like a beast over which he had no control, he suddenly stopped and spun back to face her.

She looked shocked and afraid and stepped back beyond his reach as his glare threw his revulsion at her. Tears stained her cheeks, and her chest heaved.

When he did not speak she stepped forward and touched his cheek.

Pulling back, he growled, “No, Jane. This is it, the end. How many times do you think you can make a man look a fool and expect him to dance attendance on you? No. Not anymore. I will not do it. I will leave you to your
friend.”
Thrusting the words like a knife, he tilted his head towards Sutton, who watched from a few feet away, looking pleased and gloating. “Tell Geoff I will find my own way home.”

With that, Robert turned and, swallowing back the anger and bitter taste in his throat, he walked away.

Her arms wrapping about her waist, Jane shivered, despite the warm evening air, and tears tracked down her cheeks. A single sob wrenched from her throat as she tried to breathe and watched Robert walk from her life a second time. If he’d ever really loved her, surely he would know she would never do what he’d thought he’d seen.

“That man is no loss to you.” Joshua’s voice came from behind her, deep and gloating. Her fingers forming claws, she swung about and launched her anger at him. He’d done this deliberately, for pure malice.

She understood her dead husband’s pleasure now. Oh yes. It came to her in a blinding light.

Joshua simply caught and held her wrists, laughing in her face and leaving her rage impotent.

“Now, now, my little cat. Such claws Her Grace hides until she is roused.” He hauled her against him and twisted her arms behind her back. “You’d better find yourself a good solicitor, my dear. You will receive a letter from my own in the morning. Shame. No more pretty dresses, Jane. He tells me my father’s will is nonsense and shall never stand. I will drag you through the courts, if I must, and then, my dear, you will depend on me. You’ll surrender to me in every way in the end, Jane. Do you understand? But for the moment, you’re lucky. Before I sate my desire for your body, I want to see you beg me to take you.” He let her go. She stumbled backward. He walked away, laughing, leaving her in near darkness, alone.

A deep, tremulous breath pulled into her lungs. She wiped her tears away with her shawl and began walking, stiffening her spine, ignoring her shaking hands. She had to get back, to go on.

Joshua had manipulated Robert because he’d seen Robert as her potential ally, and, in a single move, Joshua had closed that door to her. Just like his father, he wanted to control her. She saw everything now. Her former husband was controlling them both from beyond the grave, like puppets. He’d not given her security and freedom on his death. He’d set a new key in her cage. Hector had known how Joshua would react.
Like
this
. What had just happened was what Hector had willed.

She knew Joshua was right. The will would not stand, not once it was tested before a court.

It was all clear – Hector’s cruel plan. He had taken as much pleasure in taunting his son as in breaking her youthful spirit and resilience. That was Hector’s way, to destroy everything he envied, and make everyone envy him. His rift with Joshua had begun before their marriage. Hector had always intended writing this will. He’d married her to infuriate Joshua. She’d been a pawn for Hector to play against his son. He’d manipulated Joshua and broken her, but ultimately, he’d always intended Joshua would win. He’d left her nothing, done nothing for her, right up until the end. She would never have the chance to be happy.

It was no wonder Joshua had grown into a monster like his father.

Her fingers still shaking, she gripped her shawl, pulled it up over her shoulders, and walked blindly in the direction of the music. The sound of raucous voices echoed behind her. She looked back and walked into someone screaming as hands clasped her arms.

“Jane?”

“
Geoff
.” Both relief and distress rang in her voice, and a sob escaped her throat. But then, instantly, sanity returned. She didn’t even really know him. She forced herself to be calm. “Thank goodness,” she whispered in a steadier voice, pulling away. “I was lost.”

“What happened, Jane?” Violet said at her side, her fingers resting on Jane’s shoulder. “We passed Barrington leaving, with a face like thunder. He didn’t even pause to speak. We were looking for you.”

“We argued. I’m sorry. I’ve ruined your evening.”

“Do not be ridiculous, Jane. Did Barrington upset you?” Violet’s voice was deep with concern.

Jane fixed a false smile, applying all the skill she’d learned from the house of Sutton, and responded dismissively. “It was a foolish disagreement. It wasn’t his fault.”

“I will speak to him—” Geoff began, but she touched his arm.

“No. Please, don’t. It really was not his fault. It was mine, and that is an end to it. I do not wish to discuss it further. May we go now, please?”

Violet pressed Jane’s shoulder then said she was tired anyway.

~

Jane sat alone at the breakfast table with the headache and red-rimmed eyes, which Meg had failed to cure with a solution of witch hazel.

Violet had already eaten.

Selford approached, bearing a silver tray. A sealed letter lay on it.

Jane’s fingers shook when she picked it up. She slid her cup of coffee away. Her nervous stomach had not been able to face food. She broke the seal and felt it crack loose.

As Selford backed away, her eyes scanned the neat, sharp script.

It was the writ Joshua had threatened last night. A notice advising the will was in dispute.

The only solicitor she knew was Hector’s. He was the one who’d written the will. She could hardly go to him. It seemed the moment had come for her to brave sharing her humiliation. She had no choice.

Last night, when she hadn’t been able to sleep, she’d come down to borrow a book from Violet’s small library, and as she’d passed the drawing room, she’d heard Violet and Geoff talking in hushed voices.

Violet had spoken of her concern for Jane. Violet knew something was wrong, and she thought Robert’s desertion a part of it. She’d told Geoff she wished Jane would tell her what was wrong.

Well now, Jane would. “Where is Lady Rimes, Selford?”

“I believe my Lady is in the garden, Your Grace.”

Jane rose before a footman could move forward to withdraw her chair. It was about time she dared to trust someone again.

~

The good weather had held for another three weeks. The heat in the city was scorching at midday, but now it was late afternoon, and the
ton
was out
en masse
to promenade, to see and be seen along Rotten Row in Hyde Park. This was the showground for unmarried ladies, young bucks, and the leaders of fashion. Jane, however, had accompanied Violet simply to stretch her legs and seek a change of scenery. They would have come long before the fashionable hour if it had not been so intolerably hot.

With her parasol resting on her shoulder, as Violet’s was on hers, Jane promenaded across the lawns with her friend towards the Serpentine, and behind them paced two of Violet’s burly footmen, their rearguard, as Violet called them.

Since Vauxhall, Jane’s social life had narrowed.

She’d told Violet all about Hector’s cruelty, and Joshua’s manipulation, and Violet had been her usual, supportive self. She had helped Jane find a solicitor and plan out what to do. The only help that Jane had refused was an offer to have Geoff speak to Robert and explain. But Jane had not wished either Geoff or Robert involved. Geoff was too much of a stranger and if Robert could misjudge her so badly, why should she care to tell him the truth? And besides, Robert might get some silly notion in his head about duelling if she did.

So instead Violet and Jane had mapped out a defensive strategy themselves, including Violet’s new “
rearguard
”. Moreover, Jane had ceased attending balls, or any event where the Duke of Sutton and dancing might merge, and Violet’s solicitor had obtained a copy of Hector’s will and begun scanning it, looking for potential flaws. But Jane had not returned to her blacks, nor ceased any other social activity. They shopped frequently, as Violet insisted Jane should spend Sutton’s money while she could, and they attended musicals, at-homes, card parties, and supper nights, and overall, apart from the Robert-sized aching hole in Jane’s chest, life was comparably quite good.

She had not seen Robert since Vauxhall. And she’d resisted the urge to ask Geoff how Robert was.

“What will you do this evening while I am out with Geoff? I do so hate leaving you alone,” Violet said as they walked away from the hubbub of Rotten Row.

“Read probably. I am not at all bothered to be left behind, and I am sure Geoff must be weary of my presence.”

“Nonsense. Geoff likes you as well as I do. He enjoys your company.”

Jane gave her friend a smile, knowing Violet spoke the truth, yet also that Violet’s relationship with Lord Sparks was evolving into something far more intense than a simple affair. Violet had been single for years, and, apparently, she’d never paid quite so much attention to one man. Violet’s feelings seemed to be reciprocated, too, because Lord Sparks was spending less and less time beyond her friend’s immediate sphere.

Violet pointed ahead of them. “Look, is that not Barrington?”

Jane looked forward, and her heart jolted. She stopped. Violet did, too. He was just a few yards away, pacing along the gravel path about the lake where they’d stood some weeks before. A warm longing surged into Jane’s blood, and the hole in her chest filled at the sight of his tall, excellent figure and the proud bearing in his posture.

His hands were clutched behind his back as he walked beside a lanky youth, who was a little taller than Robert’s shoulder. He was listening to the youth’s animated conversation. The boy had the look of a colt, with long legs and arms, as boys did in adolescence when they suddenly sprouted inches in a matter of months. She could remember Robert looking like that.

As Jane watched, another child ran up and wrapped her arms about Robert’s leg, a young girl barely as tall as his thigh, with rich ebony curls tumbling about her face. Giggling, she refused to let go. Then her hands suddenly reached up. Robert bent and picked her up. One of her arms embraced his neck, and she planted a swift kiss on his cheek. Robert tussled her hair. The boy laughed.

Something new and unknown struck in Jane’s chest. Something vicious, cruel, and needy – jealousy and longing. This was just how she’d dreamed things may be so many years ago, for her, with him. Children. A family.

“Do you wish to go?” Violet whispered.

As she spoke, Jane looked to where the girl had come from and saw a man made in Robert’s mould.

Edward, Robert’s brother. The adopted brother of her childhood.

A woman walked with him, her fingers threaded through his, their bodies so in tune their affection was a visible force. His wife was beautiful in an uncommon fashion, slender, dark-haired and blue-eyed. She was the most attractive woman Jane had ever seen. The girl and the youth were both clearly hers.

Just as Jane was about to turn and accept Violet’s suggestion of retreat, Edward’s gaze spun in Jane’s direction, and his eyes widened in surprise. “Good Gracious!” she heard him declare. “If it is not our Jane!”

There was no running now. Jane took a sharp breath and held it, seeking to slow the thump of her racing heart, and continued on down the slight slope. Edward and his wife, their hands still clasped, strode towards her. He grinned broadly.

“Well, well, Jane Coates,” he called as they approached. “I did not know you were in town.”

She made no comment, closing her lips on the hurt that wished to declare Robert knew. That he’d chosen not to tell Edward spoke volumes.

She offered her hand. “Jane Grey now, I’m afraid.”

Edward let his wife’s hand fall, but ignored Jane’s, and, gripping her upper arms, pressed a kiss on her cheek. When he let her go, there was a glint in his eyes, stirring memories of their childhood, and he answered, “Nonsense. You shall always be Jane Coates to me, my surrogate sister.”

She smiled, too, and, looking over his shoulder, saw Robert had turned his back to her. He was skimming stones with the boy. All pleasure at seeing Robert faded. Was he cutting her? Before Edward?

“May I introduce you to my wife?” Edward said. “Jane, my wife, Ellen. Darling, I believe Jane’s full title is now the Dowager Duchess of Sutton.”

The woman’s eyes widened a little as if the statement meant something more than just an introduction, yet she bent her head and curtsied.

“There is no need for formality,” Jane declared, blushing. “As Edward said, we are as good as family. Just Jane is fine, Ellen.” She offered her hand again, and the woman took it. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

Beside Jane, Violet made a little coughing sound.

“Oh, but I am forgetting my manners, you so surprised me, Edward. Lady Rimes, this is Lord Edward Marlow and his wife.” Of course, this time Edward’s greeting was more formal as was his wife’s.

“You will walk with us a while, Jane?” Edward invited. “This weather is so hot, we have brought Mary-Rose out to find a breeze. She is so restless in the heat at home.” Jane glanced over his shoulder to see the girl balanced on Robert’s arm, cheering as her brother skipped a stone half a dozen times.

“Yes, of course,” Jane answered then added loudly, “I am surprised Robert did not mention I was in town.”

“You’ve seen him?” Edward glanced over his shoulder at Robert. “He never mentioned it.” Edward shrugged when he looked back. “But then who am I to be kept informed of his social life? Merely his brother.”

That surprised Jane. It was unlike Edward to criticise Robert. They’d been as thick as thieves as children.

Edward offered his arm to his wife, and Jane and Violet fell into step next to them. They walked along the path leading away from Robert. “Jane was our neighbour as children, Ellen. She spent more time at our hearth than her own. Jane was the daughter my mother craved. You will have seen her miniature at Robert’s country residence. It is amongst the family, just as she was. Such a little bruiser, always trying to prove she could keep up and match our boyish antics.”

“That is not quite how I remember it,” Jane laughed. “As I recall, you were always trying to lose me, and you called me a nuisance.”

“Well, you were.” A bark of laughter left his throat. “But it is good to see you.” He looked at his wife and added, “Jane was married quite young. I’ve not seen her since.”

“Oh.” Ellen smiled in her direction. “Then you should come to dinner. We have no plans this evening. I’m sure Robert shall not mind as you are virtually family.”

“No, I—” Jane began.

But Violet spoke over her attempted refusal. “You are doing nothing else, Jane. How pleasant to have the opportunity to catch up.” The look Violet threw Jane urged her to take the opportunity to patch things up with Robert.