Authors: Chandra Sparks Taylor
I picked up my phone and texted back. I LUV U AND I MISS U 2. CALL ME.
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Allen came over that night, and he seemed a little surprised when he saw my new do. I don't think he really liked it, but since he was trying to get on my good side, he played it off.
We headed to Jim n' Nick's, a local barbecue place in Homewood, and Allen apologized the whole way, telling me how much he had missed me and that he was glad I was finally talking to him again. I was just starting to believe him when I spotted another hickey on his neck.
Allen saw me staring and tried to cover it up on the sly, but I busted him.
“What is that?” I asked, putting down a rib and pointing at his neck.
“What?” he asked, probably stalling for time.
“That,” I said, putting my finger directly on the hickey.
He had this goofy expression on his face, then he finally looked at me. “Okay, I have a confession to make,” he said.
I sat there waiting on him to finish. “I was missing you so much while we were apart that after you left Jonathan's party, I went to my boy's house and this girl was all over me. I was upset about what had happened with you, so she asked if I wanted to talk and I said yeah. The next thing I knew, we were kissing.”
“That looks like it was more than kissing,” I said with an attitude.
He took a deep breath. “You're right, baby. I slept with her.”
My mouth fell open as he rushed to explain. “Really I didn't cheat on you. We were broken up,” he said.
I was so hurt, I didn't have words, and although I told myself not to, I started to cry right there at the table. Allen looked like he didn't know what to do. “I'm sorry,” he repeated.
“I was just missing you so much. I wasn't even planning on going to the party, but then Jonathan called. I'm sorry,” he lamely finished.
“That was the night we broke up,” I said. “You sure didn't waste any time.”
“Baby, I promise you she didn't mean anything to me. You know how these groupies are always hanging around. Besides, it's not like you're giving it up.” Allen kept on talking, but I drowned him out, ignoring my hurt as I thought about my promise to myself to love him the way it says in 1 Corinthians 13, just like Momma did with Daddy.
When he was finally done talking, I reached over and grabbed his hand and squeezed. “It's okay. I forgive you,” I said.
He looked at me in surprise, and I laughed. “You do?” he said.
I nodded and picked up my rib. “You're right. We were broken up, even if it was only for a few hours.” I looked him in the eye. “But we're back together now, and it better not happen again.”
He came around to my side of our booth, slid in and kissed me. “Courtland Murphy, you are an amazing woman,” he said. “I love you, and I can't wait to make you my wife.”
“I love you, too,” I said, and meant it with all my heart.
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I had just changed into sweatpants and a baggy T-shirt for practice one day a few weeks before we got out for Christmas break when Allen texted me and told me to meet him in the gym.
I glanced at the clock and realized practice was about to begin, but I figured I would chance it.
“Hey, baby,” I said when I spotted him sitting alone in the bleachers. I looked around, trying to figure out why the gym was so empty.
“Coach canceled practice today,” he said as though he was reading my thoughts.
I sat down beside him, knowing it had to be something serious for Coach Patterson to do that.
“There's something I need to tell you,” Allen said softly.
“Okay,” I said, taking his hand. “Whatever it is, you know I've got your back.”
He took a deep breath. “I didn't tell you the whole truth about that night at Jonathan's party.”
“Okay,” I said slowly.
“I told you there was one girl trying to get with me, but really there were two, and, well, the truth is, I slept with them both.”
I sat there stunned.
“The one I didn't tell you about told me she was eighteen, but I just found out today she's fifteen.”
“And how did you find this out?” I asked quietly.
He took a deep breath. “Her family is pressing charges. I'm being accused of assault and statutory rape.”
If I hadn't been sitting down, I would have passed out. “What did you just say?” I asked, trying to take it all in.
He held my hand. “Baby, I promise you I thought that girl was eighteen.”
I snatched my hand back and walked away. “Would you have told me if she wasn't filing a lawsuit?”
He shook his head. “Courtland, don't do this. We've been through it before. We were broken up. It's not like I cheated on you.”
I didn't know what to say, so I just walked away. I thought about going to cheerleading practice, but I really didn't feel like it, so I packed up my stuff and caught the bus home. When I walked through the door, Momma was there watching the news and I saw Allen's face flash across the screen.
She just looked at me with tears streaming down her face. “Please tell me he didn't do it,” she said.
I just sat down and joined her, and we watched the news story about Allen's accuser filing a lawsuit and watched footage of him being arrested at school. It must have happened right after I left. The girl and her family were holding a press conference. Allen sleeping with her was bad enough, but it hurt even worse when I saw she was whiteâor at least I thought she was white. Her face had been blurred out because she was underage, but they showed close-ups of the bruises on her arms.
After it was done, Momma just shook her head. “I don't believe a word of it. That girl knows Allen is about to be a star, and she's trying to get a piece of his money. Look at her. Why would he be with her when he's got you? There's no comparison.”
“You're just saying that because you're my momma. You have to say that,” I said. “My own daddy doesn't even want to hang around me.”
“Oh, baby, it's okay,” Momma said, hugging me. “Your daddy loves you. He just has a hard time showing it. Allen loves you, too. I know he didn't do this.”
“Momma, he slept with her,” I said. “He told me this afternoon.”
Momma didn't know what to say, so she just held me while I cried. When I was finally done, she said, “We need to pray.” She didn't wait for my response as she grabbed my hands and offered a heartfelt prayer. Once she was done, she squeezed my hands. “Everything's going to be just fine,” she said.
I nodded, but I didn't really believe her.
Later that night, Aunt Dani came over. It felt like I hadn't seen her in months because she said she had been spending a lot of time with Miles, the basketball coach Allen had introduced her to, and she had gotten an apartment near Ross Bridge in Hoover. Whenever I talked to her, she sounded really happy, and she said things were getting really serious with them.
She looked different, too. She had on low-rider jeans and a simple topâas simple as a top could be for Aunt Daniâand some really nice boots. Her hair was done in a stylish bob. From what I could tell, there was no weave in it.
She walked over to me and gave me a hug. “How are you, Corky?” she asked.
Her words just made me cry, and when I pulled back, she looked angry. “I can't believe what this boy has done. Have you talked to him?”
I nodded.
“Well, what did he say?”
I told her about my conversation with Allen, and she just seemed to get madder. “I'll call him and talk to him. This is ridiculous,” she said.
I shook my head. “Just leave it alone, Aunt Dani,” I said.
“I won't leave it alone. He hurt you. He's not going to get away with it.”
“I'm not going to give you his number,” I said. I saw the old Loretta Danielle Dennis emerging, the one who could be extremely ghetto, and it wasn't going to be pretty.
“Girl, I still have his number from when he hooked me up with Miles.” She must have seen the look of terror on my face. “If it makes you feel any better, I'll take Miles along with me. Allen needs to know he can't hurt you.”
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I thought about skipping school the next day, but Momma wouldn't let me. She told me I had done nothing wrong, and that I had nothing to be ashamed of.
After Momma dropped me off, I seriously thought about waiting until she drove off and ducking around the back of the school, but Bree spotted me.
Before I could say anything, she wrapped me in a tight hug. “Everything's going to be fine,” she said. “I've got your back. I was at that party, and I'll testify for Allen. She didn't come until right before I left, but that girl was all over him and a few of the other basketball players.”
I just nodded. When I looked up, Nathaniel was staring at me. He walked over and gave me a hug, too.
“How are you?” he asked.
I felt like I was about to cry again, so I just nodded.
“Good,” he said. “You're going to be fine.”
My friends surrounded me on either side, and we headed into the school. It was like all conversations stopped as I walked down the hall. I knew everybody was talking about me, but that didn't make me feel as bad as thinking that everyone was feeling sorry for me.
“You're here today,” my teammate Rene White said the moment she spotted me.
I wasn't in the mood for her negativity, so I ignored her.
When Candy came up and asked me if I was okay, I started crying. Although part of me believed she was sincere, another part of me wanted to believe she was laughing at me in my face because she had warned me about Allen. When she tried to touch my hand, I moved back.
“Leave me alone,” I said, glaring at her. “You're probably happy this happened.”
She nodded slowly. “I understand if you don't want to talk to me,” she said. “Believe me when I tell you that I wouldn't wish what you're going through on my worst enemy. I'll keep you and Allen in my prayers.” Even though I didn't want her to, she reached over and hugged me.
The day didn't get much better. People just kept staring at me. It was all so weird. I was used to attention, but I hadn't experienced the negative kind since middle school. Finally I decided to skip cheerleading practice and went home and got in the bed.
A week later, not much had changed. I was thankful we were out for Christmas break so I didn't have to deal with all the kids at school.
I woke up on my birthday, which happened to also be Christmas Day, and tried to get excited. I was finally seventeen. I had been waiting for this day my whole life, yet I couldn't be with the one I wanted to share it with. I tried to pretend I didn't feel anything for Allen, but I couldn't just turn off my feelings like a faucet.
I went through the routine of opening my Christmas presents, and as my parents always did, they gave me my birthday present separately. A lot of people born on or near Christmas have to share their gifts, but my momma always made sure that I felt as though Christmas was my day.
I hadn't really asked for anything special for my birthday, since the only thing I really wanted to do was date, so I didn't know what to expect.
When I opened the small box, it took a second for it to register that I was staring at a car key. My momma smiled at me from behind the video camera she was holding, and I jumped up and screamed.
“Is this what I think it is?” I yelled.
“Why don't you go look in the driveway and find out?” Momma said.
I tore out of the house with Cory close behind me and stopped when I spotted the Toyota Tercel in the driveway. It looked like it was about ten years old, and it definitely wasn't what I pictured myself driving, but once I laid my eyes on it, I fell in love. I had my own car!
Momma, Cory and I climbed in. Daddy just stood there looking at his watch, so I decided to ignore him.
We drove around the block, and when we got back, Daddy's car was gone.
“Thank you, Momma,” I said, throwing my arms around her.
She gave me a huge smile. I don't remember ever seeing her look that happy. “You're welcome, baby.” She looked at me. “Do you really like it?”
“I love it,” I said, really meaning it.
We spent the rest of the day just kind of chilling. Bree called and asked if I wanted to go to the movies later that afternoon. It was starting to get dark, and Momma wouldn't let me drive. Bree's mom came and picked me up, and we all stood around admiring my car so long that we were almost late to the movie.
Bree and I gorged ourselves on popcorn and other junk food, and as we sat watching the movie, I wondered why I had stopped hanging out with my best friend.
“That was fun,” Bree said as we were leaving the theater.
“Yeah. We have to start hanging out again,” I said.