The Promises We Keep (Made for Love Book 1) (4 page)

For a while, I couldn
’
t tell the difference between Avery and Addison. I
’
d always found them attractive, but because I couldn
’
t tell them apart, I never thought to pursue anything, from fear that I
’
d end up hitting on Beck
’
s girl. Then I got to know them
—
and while they are a lot alike, they are also incredibly different. Not that my ability to tell them apart mattered at that point. By the time I realized that I liked her as more than a friend, it was quite clear that she deserves far better than the likes of me
…

But that doesn
’
t mean that I can
’
t look.

She
’
s more than a foot shorter than me; and even though I know she
’
s got her own little bit of strength, evident in her toned muscles gained from years of running and carrying that cello of hers, she
’
s so petite and delicate. Sometimes I wonder how her personality fits inside of her small frame. She
’
s incredibly talented, with a focus and determination that seems to be a reflection of my own. She can also be really shy, which I find to be just downright adorable. Then she
’
ll get really passionate about something and you can
’
t shut her up, but she
’
s always kind and genuine.

When she looks up at me with those big brown eyes, like she is now, and smiles at me with her full heart-shaped lips, she owns me. She doesn
’
t know it
—
but she does. What I want to do is scoop her up into my arms and tell her how pretty I think she is, only I won
’
t. Instead I simple say,
“
Good Morning.
”

“
Finally!
He speaks,
”
says Beckham, nudging me with his shoulder.
“
I thought I was just going to have to stand here all morning and watch you two stare at each other.
”
I whip my head around and cast a warning glare at him. He chuckles and pushes past me.
“
Morning, Ave.
”
He greets her with a hug and I force myself to shake off my annoyance
—
first, in regards to his comment; second, in regards to the fact that he just stole my hug.

“
Morning, Hammy.
”
When he releases her and enters the apartment, she offers me a smile and, just like that, all my irritation has become null and void.
“
Morning, Sonny.
”

My arms are wrapped around her before I can even stop to think about it. I manage to control myself, enough to keep her feet on the ground, and pull away before I send the wrong message. As she steps away from me, I close us inside and she furrows her brow in confusion.

“
Where are Jack and Claire?
”

Beckham and I make eye contact, silently recalling why we decided to leave early.
“
They
’
ll probably be late,
”
he says.

“
They got distracted,
”
I add with a shrug.

“
Oh,
”
Avery whispers with a blush. The color in her cheeks turns my smile into a grin.

“
Hey, guys,
”
calls Sarah from the kitchen.
“
I
’
m guessing your early arrival means you
’
re quite hungry this morning.
”

“
For your pancakes? Always,
”
I reply.

“
Morning, love,
”
Addie greets Beck as she emerges from her room.

For a moment, none of us exist. That
’
s how they are, how I
’
ve always known them to be, and I envy them. No
—
envy isn
’
t the right word. I
’
m happy for them, I just wish I could have something like that
—
something pure and healthy and full of love...but regardless of all the things I
’
ve put behind me, I
’
m not sure I
’
ll ever have what they have. Not with the woman I wish to share it with. She deserves more than the mess that is my past
—
she deserves someone like Beckham.

Growing up, it was just my father and me. Or should I say
Patrick
and me.
He doesn
’
t believe in love. In fact, I
’
m not sure that he believes in much of anything, anymore. Not even me. He does believe in whiskey with his breakfast, microwave dinners in front of the television, and Saturday night bar brawls
—
but not love. The only exposure to affection I ever had growing up was from my Uncle Charlie. My mother
’
s brother. Or should I say
Rhonda
’
s
brother; she wasn
’
t really much of a mother.

Charlie lived in Colorado for as long as I could remember and, two weeks every summer, my dad would send me out here to hang out with him. I remember those fourteen days were the best fourteen days I would have all year. I
’
d get drunk off of Charlie
’
s attention
—
I craved it in ways that I couldn
’
t even understand. He always treated me the way I wished my father would but never did. It broke my heart when he passed away a couple years ago. Having experienced so much shit in my childhood, I never imagined losing him could hurt as much as it did. He saved my life, all those years ago, during our time together.

Charlie took me to church. Two Sundays. Two Sundays a year I would set foot in a church. Back then, it wasn
’
t enough
—
it wasn
’
t enough to compensate for the other fifty Sundays I had to endure with Patrick, or rather, without him. It wasn
’
t enough to help put the pieces of my shattered childhood back together. There were so many things that I longed to escape from and I always felt like Colorado was a safe place; Uncle Charlie was my safe place
…
but two weeks was never enough.

To add insult to injury, I was a military brat. Being a marine was just about the only thing that mattered to Patrick, so we were moving all the time. My home was never a stable one and moving around the country every couple of years made it even worse
—
I didn
’
t have time to even figure out what it meant to plant roots somewhere. Patrick retired just before my freshman year of high school. We moved to Texas a couple weeks before school began. It was a blessing and a curse. It was a relief to be able to stay at one school for four years
—
but living with that man was never easy. To make matters worse, he and Charlie had some sort of falling out and my summer visits to Colorado stopped. That
’
s when I decided, that
’
s when I
knew,
that if I was ever going to find my way back to Colorado
—
or
anywhere
away from Patrick
—
I had to make my own way. So I did.

Football was my ticket out, so I gave it everything I had. I made sure to stay on top of my grades, as a backup and to make sure I was always eligible to play, but I was good at football. Really good. I always thought that part of my skill came naturally and the rest came from sheer determination. I tried to stay as focused as possible, but I definitely did my fair share of dumb stuff. Sometimes football wasn
’
t enough and I needed another outlet, another way to find escape
…
sometimes I needed more than the team.

Anyway, my hard work paid off. I had a few colleges interested in me, but when Colorado State offered me a full ride, I knew that it was meant to be
—
like destiny. Then I met Beckham. I met Beckham and I realized that it was more than destiny that brought me here. There was something about him, something so genuine, kind, and accepting
—
something so subtle that I couldn
’
t place my finger on it; but I was drawn to it. We clicked in a way I
’
d never experienced with anyone. I trusted him. I trust him still, more than anyone. He
’
s my best friend and he
’
s taught me a lot about life
—
about family.

Then I met Addie, Avery, and Sarah and I became a part of a community
—
something different than a team, something bigger than football. Nothing has been the same ever since.

I wrap my arms around Addie and scoop her off her feet, holding her tightly against my chest. She hums a laugh, hiding her face in my neck, and the smile that pulls at my lips can
’
t be helped. She smells amazing and when she pulls away in order to align her gaze with mine, I
’
m reminded just how much I love this girl. Not that I really need reminding. I feel like I
’
ve loved her forever.

Five years ago
—
actually, four years and ten months ago
—
my church youth group went to a statewide conference. That
’
s where I met Addie. I often wonder how my life would be different if Avery was in my small group instead of Addison. The two of them being identical, I would have been attracted to her, too. I wonder if I had met Avery first and then Addison later if our lives would be on the same course they are on now or if we
’
d be living separately. Luckily, such thoughts are just hypothetical. As it turns out, Addison was the one in my small group. Amazingly enough, I didn
’
t even meet Avery until the last day. I didn
’
t think much of it then. There were hundreds of us at the conference. Now that I know them so well, I think it
’
s crazy that they weren
’
t connected at the hip more often.

In any case, Addie and I hit if off right away. She was fun to be around and easy to talk to; she was sweet and pretty and I loved the sound of her laugh. We soon discovered that we were the same age, in the same grade, and resided in the same city
—
Colorado Springs
—
but because our parents went to different churches and we didn
’
t attend the same schools, our paths had never crossed. Once they had, there was no way I was going to let her get away.

We hung out all summer and, just before school started, I found the courage to ask her to be my girlfriend. I thought I was in love. Now, almost five years later, I know that wasn
’
t love
—
what I feel now, as I look into her beautiful brown eyes, alight with the happiness that always glows like this when she
’
s in my arms
—
yeah,
this
is love.

“
Hey, babe,
”
I say, returning her greeting before pressing a kiss to her lips.

“
Enough already,
”
chides Gray.
“
Put her down so that the rest of us can say hello.
”
I know he
’
s getting me back for a minute ago. I look at him over my shoulder before taunting him by kissing Addie one more time.