The Prospective Wife (20 page)

She could tell by the way Matt was looking at her that he knew she was lying her head off. She hoped he wouldn’t call her bluff in front of everyone, especially after she’d won over Drusilla with her ‘sisters must be strong’ act.

‘In that case,’ Matt said, his eyes firmly fixed upon hers, ‘consider yourself invited.’ He turned to his father and extended his hand and looked his father directly in the eye.

Kat held her breath. She was pretty sure she wasn’t the only one. Just when she thought she’d miscalculated, Connor Devlin thrust his hand out to his son.

It would be too much to say that everything got cosy, even though much laughter and tears followed, but Kat was satisfied that things were moving in the right direction.

Later, when they were finally alone, Matt planted his hands on the wall beside her head and leaned towards her. It was more a promise than a threat.

‘Well, you little witch, are you pleased with yourself?’

Kat’s eyes sparkled back up at him. ‘I don’t know what you’re talking about,’ she replied, tongue firmly tucked in her cheek.

Matt threw back his dark head and laughed. ‘Sure you don’t. I suppose you think you’ve got all the Devlins eating out of your little hand now…’ He lifted her hand and pressed his open mouth to her palm. Kat sighed as delicious little quivers ran all the way up her arm.

Her eyes darkened dramatically. ‘I only want one Devlin to eat out of my hand,’ she insisted huskily.

Matt looked at the invitation glowing in her eyes and he inhaled sharply. ‘You haven’t given me your answer yet.’

Kat traced the outline of her lips with the tip of her tongue. She felt the shudder that ran all the way through his tall loose-limbed frame.

‘Remind me what the question was,’ she whispered huskily.

His nostrils flared as his eyes ran hungrily over her flushed face. ‘Marry me?’ he purred.

Kat grinned cheekily and ducked under his arm. She skipped backwards across the room. Matt had been running away from those in hot matrimonial pursuit for so long, perhaps it wouldn’t do him any harm to do the running himself for once…not that Kat had any intention of running too far or too hard!

‘Maybe,’ she carolled sweetly—just before she tripped over a stray shoe she’d kicked off a little earlier.

She landed on her bottom with an undignified bump; before she had time to see if he was laughing at her plight, she felt herself being hauled to her feet. The hands curled around her upper arms clamped her arms to her sides and brought her up onto her tiptoes. She could feel the hard strength of him; the warm male scent of him made her nostrils quiver.

‘Maybe…?’
he prompted grimly. The tense, driven expression on his face suggested this wasn’t a subject Matt took lightly.

‘A definite maybe…?’ Her sultry smile faltered and faded totally beneath the driving intensity of his hard tense scrutiny. ‘Yes!’ she cried urgently. ‘Yes, please, I will marry you, Matt…’ Her eyes brimmed; her throat clogged with emotion.

Triumph blazed to life in his eyes. He brought his face down close to hers. Kat couldn’t blink, she couldn’t breathe.

‘Why will you marry me, my little witch?’

‘Because I love you, Matt, deeply, madly,
desperately!
’ she cried.

The intensity of her declaration seemed to take him aback for a moment. Dark colour ran up under his skin as he stared down at her with a stunned, un-Matt-like expression. She saw the muscles of his throat work.

‘Thank God for that,’ he breathed, just before his dark head bent forward. Kat’s lips parted eagerly under the insistent pressure of his marauding lips.

‘I can’t stand up,’ she complained weakly when he’d eventually had his fill.

‘Now you know how I felt.’

The memory of his suffering brought a cloud to her sunny horizon. ‘Don’t joke about it…’ she began fiercely. ‘What are you doing?’ she gasped as he swept her off her feet.

‘Loving you. Do you mind?’

Kat curved her arms tightly around his neck as he lifted her across the bed. ‘Not in the least,’ she admitted happily.

I have everything I could ever want, she thought dreamily as his lips touched her neck, her throat, her lips… This is the start of my very own happy-ever-after. Nothing can spoil it.

Or so she thought!

HIS mother leaned through the car window once more and caught hold of the loose hem of Matt’s shirt; she tugged him down to eye level.

‘How many more times are you going to say goodbye, woman?’ her husband enquired wearily. ‘I lost count at around five.’ He didn’t act as if he expected his wife to pay any heed to him.

‘The moment I saw her I knew she was right for you.’ Drusilla’s eyes filled with tears. ‘I just didn’t know if you’d be bright enough to realise it too. I’m so glad you are. Now everything’s turned out perfectly. I know Amy was desperately worried about how the poor girl would cope with those wretched gambling debts once she was gone,’ she confided. ‘Amy wouldn’t tell me how bad they were,’ she chattered on, oblivious to the frozen expression on her son’s face. ‘Which makes me suspect they were pretty bad.’ She looked to Matt for confirmation of her suspicions.

‘Pretty bad,’ he agreed, straightening up. He banged on the roof of the car, causing his father to protest vigorously from inside. Matt responded mechanically to a fresh outbreak of a final round of goodbyes.

Kat stood in the doorway, the stone flags cold under her bare feet, and waited for Matt to turn around and join her. When he didn’t, she felt puzzled; when the seconds became minutes and the minutes multiplied, she felt seriously concerned. He hadn’t moved an inch since the car carrying his parents had pulled away.

She called his name a couple of times but the wind must have snatched it away because still he didn’t move. Worriedly, she went back indoors to search out a pair of shoes. She shoved her feet into the first pair she came across—which happened to be an old pair of Matt’s tennis shoes. Kat wasn’t much bothered what sort of fashion statement she was making.

‘Matt…?’ Warily she touched his arm, her fingers closing over compact muscle. As always when she touched him, she was aware of the steely hardness in his body, the promise of strength. It was the first time she’d ever touched him and sensed rejection. With a tiny gasp of dismay she stepped back, her eyes wide and confused.

She gave her head a tiny shake, inclined to write off her initial impression to an over-active imagination, but the chill around her heart still didn’t disperse. Then he turned to face her and she knew she’d not been imagining anything. His face would have held more warmth had it been carved of stone.

‘What’s wrong, Matt…?’

Bad
—it had to be something bad to make him look like that. She sought around wildly for a probable cause for that awful empty look in his eyes. Had he and his father had words again…?

‘Is it true that your financial problems are gambling debts?’

Kat’s eyes widened. It was the last thing she had expected to hear. Was that all…? If anything, she felt relieved. He was probably a bit narked that she hadn’t confided in him yet…

‘Did Drusilla tell you? I meant to explain,’ she told him frankly, ‘but to be honest it was a bit embarrassing.’

‘I can imagine.’

The pucker between her brows deepened. He sounded really strange, and he was still radiating that
hands off
thing that made her feel afraid to touch him. Her tummy muscles cramped with panic.

‘Now you know all my secrets,’ she babbled brightly. Her attempt at levity fell flat on its face. Something was going on here she didn’t understand.

‘Until the next time,’ he responded heavily.

‘Pardon…?’ The pain in his eyes just didn’t make any sense.

‘There’s always a next time with compulsive gamblers. You could say,’ he explained, with a self-derisive laugh, ‘that I have had some experience of how deceitful and plausible they can be…’

‘Good God!’ she gasped. ‘You think
I
…’ Her expression cleared she caught hold of his arm. ‘You don’t understand!’ she cried.

‘Oh, but I do!’ he grated grimly. ‘Maybe that’s the problem. I know it’s a disease, and you need help…therapy. I want to help, but I’ve got to be brutally honest here, Kathleen I’m not sure I can. I’ve been standing here thinking about it, and I still don’t know.’ His clouded blue eyes looked dully into the distance. ‘It’s all about trust, and the bottom line is I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to trust you. There’ll always be a nagging doubt at the back of my mind…’

The explanation that would have solved everything withered on her tongue.
Trust.
She bit back the hysterical urge to laugh…or was it cry…? He was right, this was all about trust. Kat felt as if she were encased in ice. Her hand fell from his arm and she pressed her fingers against the throbbing points of pain at her temples.

‘So what you’re actually saying is that if I’m a compulsive gambler you don’t want anything to do with me?’

‘
If!
You see—you’re denying you’ve got a problem.’

‘From where I’m standing, the only problem I’ve got is you!’ she yelled back bitterly.

‘I’m not turning my back on you, Kathleen. I couldn’t, even if I wanted to…’

‘Then you want to?’

‘Maybe I do have a problem,’ he admitted, brushing his hand through his thick glossy hair in a gesture that was intensely weary. ‘But so do you.’ His disillusioned sombre eyes avoided her face like a man avoiding a hot fire. ‘I’m just being honest with you, telling you how I feel. I’ve got a history, you see, of…’

‘Oh, you told me about the partner who nearly gambled away your precious company. And they say lightning doesn’t strike in the same place twice!’ she sneered, and a flicker of anger crossed his face. ‘Well, you needn’t worry. It will be quite safe from me—because I wouldn’t marry a man whose idea of for better or worse is to bale out the instant things get rough. I just consider myself lucky that I found that out before things got complicated.’ God, yes, she felt
very
lucky…lucky as in winning the lottery and losing the ticket!

‘You don’t call this complicated?’

Kat gave a careless shrug. ‘Like you said, we didn’t have a contract, and as far as I’m concerned we just terminated our arrangement. I mean, I wouldn’t want to be around the next time you lost a fiver out of your wallet… And I believe these are yours, too.’ She slipped out of the well-worn tennis shoes and shoved them at him.

‘Don’t be stupid! We can make this right…’

For a moment her protective shield of anger slipped… How she wanted to believe him…how she wanted things to go back to the way they’d been. She lifted her pain-filled grey eyes to his.

‘Do you actually believe that, Matt? Or is it just wishful thinking?’ she whispered. She saw the tell-tale flicker of doubt in those deep blue depths and with a brittle laugh she rushed on.

‘And this is yours too.’ She tugged off the snug-fitting engagement ring, an antique that had belonged to his grandmother—Matt had called it fate when it had fitted her like a glove. She held it out to him. ‘I was going to pawn it tomorrow, but what the hell? Easy come, easy go—you know how it is with us high rollers!’

‘Kathleen!’ He flung the shoes and ring aside and plunged after the bare-footed figure fleeing up the driveway. The gravel must have been tearing her feet to shreds but she didn’t seem to notice. He caught up with her and without saying a word scooped her up and carried her over the rest of the uneven surface.

The last time, she thought as she was carried along by those strong arms. The last time this will happen. The last time a lot of things would happen. The sense of loss that permeated her entire being was akin to bereavement.

Kat’s chest was heaving with a combination of physical exertion and emotional turmoil by the time he placed her back on her feet.

‘Don’t leave me.’

It couldn’t be a plea. Matt Devlin didn’t beg… Her eyes flickered to his face. The only information she gleaned was that he was the most incredibly attractive man she’d ever seen—and she’d already known that. His expression was frustratingly unrevealing.

‘Why?’ She gave him the chance to come up with something really good, and it looked as if he was going to come up with the goods. He looked like a man fighting a particularly vicious internal battle and getting nowhere fast… Kat withdrew her gaze hastily. She couldn’t afford to get empathic; she had her own problems—problems such as her heart was breaking.

‘You love me…?’ she suggested, making it sound like a joke.

She watched his mouth harden.

‘I thought not. You’ve never said it before, so why start now when it’s so obviously not true?’

Before, she’d been so deliriously happy she’d been prepared to overlook the fact he’d never once told her he loved her, even though she’d babbled on about her own love
ad nauseum
…actions speak louder than words, she’d told herself. Now she knew differently; now she knew he’d never said it because he didn’t!

‘Love has nothing to do with this, Kathleen. You need help.’

‘I need a taxi,’ she contradicted, mounting the stairs.

‘I’ll help you through this…’

‘Because you’re that sort of guy,’ she mocked. ‘Thanks, but no thanks, Matt. To be frank, it makes me sick to look at you!’ she told him coldly.

She didn’t look back to see what effect her words had had on him, but he didn’t follow her—that said it all.

‘I thought I was being paranoid at first. Then I checked for obvious things, like was my skirt tucked in my knickers, or…?’

‘God, yes, do you remember when Mrs Rutherford at—?’

‘Don’t change the subject, Andie,’ Kat cut in impatiently. ‘Why is half the hospital staring at me as if I’ve got two heads? Why are people muttering behind their hands and why do conversations stop dead when I walk into a room?’ she finished hotly.

With a sigh, Andie thrust her hand deep into her capacious shoulder bag. She extracted a dog-eared magazine and, avoiding Kat’s eyes passed it to her.

‘I didn’t believe it…honestly…’