The Raging Hearts: The Coltrane Saga, Book 2 (2 page)

“As long as a man’s got land, he’s never really poor,” Poppa had said. “I’d rather have my land than all the gold on Earth, because you know it’s going to be there tomorrow. Don’t ever sell this land, Kitty, girl. Never sell the Wright land.”

And she had promised him. The land was hers now, for as far as she could see.

She had not heard him walking behind her, nor heard him call to her. Feeling the strong arms slipping about her waist was the first she knew that Travis was there. “I know you’re upset, sweetheart, but we need to be moving on. Sam and me need to join back up with our men. I need to find you a room at the hotel. The town is going to be full of Union soldiers, swarming around, and I want you in a safe place.”

Kitty wiped at the perspiration on her brow. She was dirty, grimy. The ragged Confederate uniform she had taken from a dead soldier was now bloodstained and stiff with soil from her work in the field hospital. A strand of hair tumbled forward, and she pushed it back from her eyes, seeing that it, too, was stained with blood. How long since she had bathed? She could not remember.

“Kitty, Kitty.” Travis was gently shaking her, turning her around to face him, his hand cupping her chin. “I’ve been talking to you, but you don’t hear me. Are you in shock over all that’s happened? I know it’s been terrible, darling, but you’re a strong woman. I know how strong, remember? Because we have been through hell, together.”

“Yes.” Her voice was barely audible. “We have been through hell. It’s over now.”

“Well, it’s almost over. A few more months, that’s all the war can last. Then it’s a new beginning for us.”

She stared up into his handsome face. This man could warm any woman’s heart with just a smile. And he was looking at her now as though he wanted to touch those warm lips against hers. His head moved, lowering, but she stepped backward. It was not proper. Not here, now, moments after her father’s burial.

She turned from him.

“Kitty.”

She turned to stare at him. They had not talked much since he had loomed up out of the swamps at Bentonville in time to avenge her father’s death. Kitty had been too anguished. Now, standing only a few feet away from the man she had alternately desired and despised, she felt suddenly shy.

“Kitty. We have to talk. You may not feel it’s the time, but we have to. As I said, I think you realize by now that I do care for you.”

Kitty stared at him, thinking once again how beautiful his eyes were—not blue, not black, but a blending that became the color of steel. Now they looked warm, loving, but once they had mirrored anger, disgust, even hatred. His hair was the color of the raven’s wing, shining black, and he had a firm set to his jaw. His lips were smooth, the bow even. Now she saw a muscle tense. He stood before her, waiting for her to speak, the Union cavalry uniform as dirty and blood-splotched as the clothes she wore.

“I remember an afternoon on a windswept hilltop outside of Richmond,” she said. “Poppa and I were sitting on the hilltop talking, happy to be together after so long. And then you came along, saying you had to talk to Poppa about the new orders you had just received from General Grant. You made me leave, saying I couldn’t be trusted, since my heart belonged to the Confederacy. I was angry, and I left and went back to the little shack where I was staying in the Yankee camp. And you followed me there, grabbing me and forcing me to submit to you.”

“Kitty, I didn’t force you,” he protested, taking a step toward her, but she held up her hands. “I might have made you want me, but I did not force you.”

“Your words were, ‘I’m the way I am, and I’ll never change, but I do give a damn about you.’ Well, Travis, I’m the way I am, and I’ll never change, but I do give a damn about you.” She smiled sadly. “I remember something else about that day, after we made love so sweetly and tenderly. Even though there were times you abused me after you rescued me from Luke Tate, times that I hated you and could have killed you with my bare hands—on that afternoon, I loved you with all my heart. And then I slept in your arms, and I awoke later to find you gone. I went to search for you, and I found you with another woman.”

“Kitty”—he gestured helplessly—“that was planned. As cruel as it sounds, it was all set up on purpose. I had to anger you enough to make you leave our camp. I knew what our orders were. I knew you would want to go along, not only because you wanted to be with your father but because you and I knew at last that we loved each other. Having you see me with that woman was the one way I could send you away from danger.”

“My father slipped into Goldsboro to tell me these things. He said you set the whole thing up. But I felt like such a fool. I look back now and think of the way Nathan used me, and then you, and I don’t think I can ever trust another man. Poppa was the only man who never deceived me or hurt me.”

The steel-gray eyes that had gazed at her so warmly turned cold. “Can you say you never deceived me, Kitty? Remember after I rescued you from Luke Tate and you tricked me into believing you could be trusted, made me think you loved me? I let my guard down, and it almost got me killed. In fact, the ball intended for me hit another soldier and sent him to his grave. And you ran away with a Rebel soldier and never looked back.”

“I did look back,” she cried, her body trembling as the memories took over. “When I thought you were dead, it hurt me terribly. But you did use me, Travis. Remember how you scorned me? You said it was beneath you to force yourself upon any woman. You made me feel like dirt, Travis, remember? I had every reason to hate you. You wouldn’t set me free then or send me back to my own people. You kept me with you, dragging me through the battlefields. You gave me no other choice. I could not stay with you, not with the humiliation you offered me.”

She turned her face away, unable to meet his angry gaze. “I remember the times in your arms, when you made love to me. No, you never forced me to submit, did you? But you knew a hundred ways to make my body scream, ways to make me tremble with desire, my blood turn to fire. Never had I envisioned such joy, and I thought it had to be love. Later, I felt used.”

“I never meant to make you feel that way.” He stepped forward and put his arms around her, pulling her to his strong chest. She could feel the pounding of his heart. “You had your painful memories to bear, but so did I. I learned early that a woman can’t be trusted, and every time I came close to giving you my heart, you showed me you were like all the others. I wanted to give you a chance. I want to give you another now. Damn it, Kitty, I’m asking you to give both of us a chance at a future together. Maybe this isn’t the time or the place, with the Union troops marching over your homelands, and your father hardly cold in his grave. But the future is actually the present when you stop and think about it, no matter what the circumstances. This is here and now, and I’m telling you that I love you, that I want you, and that I want us to have a life together.”

Their eyes met and held, each searching the other for some reason for confidence.

“I love you, Kitty. I think I loved you from that first moment. And when we made love that first time, it was like nothing I had ever experienced before. You were in my blood, and for a long time I hated you for it. I had vowed that never again would a woman possess my heart to trample upon it. Yet, you, who were promised to an enemy soldier, you took my heart and made it your prisoner.”

“I
know
about your past,” she confessed. “I know about your mother. I know about the other woman in your life who used you. Sam told me. He thought I had a right to know. He saw what was happening between us, and he loved us both enough that he wanted to help us get together. But now I wonder if you could ever trust me, Travis. Perhaps your wounds are too deep.”

“My mother didn’t actually betray me, Kitty.” His voice was bitter. He held her tightly, and she could feel his warm breath on her face. “She betrayed my father. He killed her and then himself, leaving me and my sister behind. I had that grief to bear. Then I went through the horror of having my sister kidnapped by slave traders who sold her into a life of hell as a captive prostitute. She could not endure it, and she killed herself. That was why I joined the Union Army when the war broke out, even though I was a Southerner. I would give my life to help stop the enslavement of human beings.

“In my agony and loneliness, I turned to a woman of the streets, who found pleasure in any man’s arms. True, I have bitter memories of some women, but you’re different. I’ve seen you work as hard to save the life of a Union soldier as you would for a Confederate. I’ve seen you stand up under pressures that would have made another woman faint. You’re strong. You’re also the most hellish woman I’ve ever tried to contend with. But you’ve a way about you that goes deeper than beauty—and God, you’re beautiful! I want a future with you, Kitty Wright. I want to forget the past and build all my tomorrows with you.”

She drew in her breath in wonder. Then she reached out to trail gentle fingertips down his stubbled face. “Oh, Travis, there’s so much pain to forget.”

“We can overshadow that with happiness.”

“Yes, yes, we can.” Their lips met, and they melted together.

Gently he pulled her down to her knees and they sank to the ground. Then they were lying side by side, and he was slowly unbuttoning her shirt. She could feel the hardness of his manhood throbbing against her thigh, the pulsating strength that told her he wanted her.

“How I have dreamed of this, darling,” he murmured.

And so they soared together, climbing to the sun, drifting among the clouds, dancing in the wind and finally floating back to earth.

For a moment, neither moved or spoke. They savored their closeness. Then Travis raised his head to gaze down upon her with a strange coldness in his gray eyes. “I love you, Kitty, but heed me well. I give you my heart, and if you ever trample upon it and deceive me, you will rue the day we met. For I will have my revenge, be assured.”

A chill moved through her. He frightened her. Travis could be kind and loving, but he could also be absolutely ruthless. And this was the side of him that she feared, for when he was truly riled, he was a dangerous man.

“Be good to me, Kitty, and I will worship you. But do me wrong, and you will suffer. This I swear.”

“I…I don’t think I like being threatened.” Her voice was braver than she felt. But she was not about to be intimidated. “And if you think I’m one of those dizzy women who will be content to sit in the parlor and tat and embroider and make idle chatter with other scatterbrained females, you are wrong, sir. Nor will I be content to sit at home and have a baby every year while you have adventure and excitement. I have a spirit of my own. It is a free spirit, and no man will ever possess me completely.”

He laughed then, that smug laugh that she had always hated. It was infuriating, as though he knew he possessed the upper hand and only humored her when she talked independence. “I already do possess you, little one, and don’t you forget it. Now enough of this grim talk. We must leave here and go to Goldsboro and find a room for you while Sam and I rejoin our men. There will be time later to talk about what to do with you.”

He got to his feet, straightening his uniform. She scrambled up to put her clothes in order. “What do you mean, ‘talk about what to do with me’? I know what I’m going to do, Travis. I’m going to farm this land. The scuppernong vines are coming up. You should see them!” Her voice trembled with excitement. “I might make enough from the crop this year to pay for repairing my father’s bee hives. Then, from the honey, I can save money to think about planting tobacco next year. Poppa said this land is good for tobacco. I can find a job in town to tide me over till I can get on my feet. Maybe I can even get a loan at the bank to build a small farmhouse.”

He whirled around, eyes wide. “Are you crazy, woman? You talk nonsense. We don’t know yet what the impact of the North’s victory will be upon the South. Your land may be taken from you. Have you thought about that?”

Her chin jutted upward in the stubborn gesture that told Travis there was no point in trying to argue with her now. But she would see, he thought wearily. War changes everything, and life as she had known it would never return.

“We’ll talk later,” he said, forcing a smile and holding out his hands to her. “It’s enough for now to know that we have an understanding, Kitty. I love you, and you say you love me. For now, that’s enough to build on.”

She took his hand and returned his smile. “You’ll see, Travis Coltrane.” She was bubbling with enthusiasm as they made their way out of the woods. “This farm will one day be the most prosperous in all of Wayne County. It will be a fine place to raise a family.”

“Kitty, I don’t…” He had stopped walking and stood staring down at her, searching her eyes, seeing such a happy glow there that he could not go on. He could not tell her that her dreams would not come true. He could not tell her that it was not his intention to settle in North Carolina. His home was the Louisiana bayou, and it was there he wanted to take her. He would have to tell her these things later.

“Later,” he said gruffly, tugging at her hand to pull her along to where Sam Bucher waited on the other side of the field. “Later, I will tell you, Kitty. For now, there are things to be done.”

And she squeezed his hand, confident in their love, sure that only joy and happiness lay ahead. She did not see the shadows in Travis Coltrane’s eyes.

Chapter Two

It had been General William T. Sherman’s plan from the time he left Savannah, Georgia, to have all available men and armies of the North meet at Goldsboro, North Carolina, which was the most important rail supply center for the Confederate armies around Richmond. General Joseph E. Johnston, with his Army of Tennessee, had not been sure of Sherman’s route until after he had left Fayetteville, North Carolina. It had appeared that Sherman was heading for Raleigh, but when his left wing made a right turn along the Goldsboro road, just ten miles out of Fayetteville, his plan became clear.