The Running Series Complete Collection: 3-Book Set plus Bonus Novella (75 page)

As I’m baking my special treat for Evan, for the first time in days, I start to feel hope.  I’m just worried about his willingness to accept help.  For someone like him, it may be too big of a challenge. 

I’m up until well after midnight baking.  My first two attempts don’t work as well as I had anticipated.  I’m having some trouble folding the cookies without breaking them.  Finally, the third attempt works perfectly.  While the cookies are still hot, I place the typed message inside one, fold the cookie in half, pull the edges down, and place the cookie into a muffin tin to hold its shape.  The result – a perfectly formed fortune cookie.  My gift to Evan.

I lay my head down for a few hours of shut-eye, and when I do, sleep comes easily again tonight.  I set my alarm to wake up before the sun because I have an early morning delivery to make.

My alarm goes off while it’s still pitch black outside.  I check on my creation, and all seems well.  I find a small gift box, tissue paper, and a big red bow.  Carefully, I wrap the cookie, taking care not to break the fragile pastry.  I need to get this gift on his deck by six o’clock.  It’s Saturday, so he has no practice, but I know he may still get up early to work out.  I want to deliver my gift box without getting caught.

Under the cover of darkness, I park my car at the south end of the boardwalk.  With my gift in hand, I begin my jog towards Evan’s house.  As I get closer, I can see the house is still dark.  There’s no sign of life.  I sneak up to the deck, place the gift on our loveseat, then scurry back down the stairs, jogging quickly back to my car.  The moon produces just enough light that I can see exactly where I’m going.  Relief washes over me as I make it back to my car undetected.

Today’s going to be a big day.  Auggie’s getting better.  And, hopefully, I’ll get to talk to Evan. 

Putting on a Brave Face

I
take a shower and eat breakfast, doing my best to keep busy waiting for time to pass.  After a trip to the park with Maddy, it’s nearly ten o’clock and I cannot wait another minute.  I send Evan a text.

Jette: 
Thank you for the beautiful flowers

Evan: 
Did you read the card?

Jette: 
Yes

Evan: 
And?

Jette: 
My answer is in a box on your deck.  When you’re ready to talk call me

Evan: 
OK

When my phone doesn’t ring immediately, I start to panic.  Was my message too vague?  What could be taking him so long to call me back?

In order to distract my overactive imagination, I decide to strip all the beds and wash the sheets.  Auggie’s surgery was four days ago, and in a few days’ time, he will probably be coming home.  With the wash started, I decide to clean out the refrigerator.  As I pull out the vegetable drawer to empty it of its contents, my phone rings.  Finally!

I answer the phone, “Hi.”

“Hi yourself,” he responds.  God, I miss the sound of his voice.

“Did you find it?”

“Of course I did.  You left it on our loveseat.  It was the first place I looked, Juliette.  Please come home.  I need to see you.  I have to tell you how sorry I am.”  I can tell by the tone in his voice that he’s sincere.

“I want to talk to you, too Evan.  I have to go to the hospital to check on Auggie, but I can come over around four o’clock.  Is that okay?”  I’m afraid that if I go there now, I’ll be putty in his hands.  He has a way of making me forget everything and lose myself in him entirely.  I can’t do that right now.  This is too important.

“Okay, four o’clock.”

“Evan, one thing – do you understand what I meant by ‘make the turn’?  It’s important to me that you do.”

“I think so.  I’ve said some pretty horrible things to you, Juliette.  I have a lot of apologizing to do.  I already started with Derek and Ryker.”

“No that’s not it.  I mean, yes, you do owe me an apology, but that’s not enough this time.  We need to figure out why, Evan.  Why did this happen?  If you can answer me that when I see you, then we have a chance.”

“That’s all I need Juliette, a chance.”  There’s silence for a moment, then he adds, “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”  Shit.  I wish I didn’t say that.  I need to get off the phone before I make more promises I’m not ready for. “I’ll see you at four.”  And with that, I hang up.

I finish the few chores I’ve begun, and then head over to the hospital.  When I step into Auggie’s room, they have him out of bed, and sitting in a chair.  “Oh, Auggie, look at you!  Have you been sitting here long?”

“The doctor was in early this morning.  The nurses got me out of bed right after he left.”

I give him a big hug and I can’t help but notice one big change.  “Auggie, you smell great.  And your hair is washed.  Did you take a shower?”

“I did.”  He’s got a shit-eating grin from ear to ear, so I know there’s more to the story.  I raise one eyebrow suspiciously and he adds, “They sent me a male nurse.  His name is Alan.  He helped get me up, if you know what I mean.”

“Oh, my God!  You did
not
just say that.”  I give him a light smack on the shoulder.  Auggie’s back. 

Auggie and I have a few hours to spend together before I have to be at Evan’s.  We chat a little, but mostly, we just hang out today.  Whenever Auggie and I have time to spare, one of our favorite pastimes is watching old eighties movies.  I pull out his laptop and login to my Amazon account.  “I have a special treat for us today, Auggie.  Guess what I rented for us to watch together.”

“Is it a Brat Pack movie?  Please tell me it is.  I could definitely use a little injection of Rob Lowe to make me feel better.”  Auggie’s crazy about Rob Lowe. 

“Yes, and no.  How about some Andrew McCarthy for a change?  I thought a comedy might lift your spirits.”

“Hmm, let’s see.  Brat Pack.  Comedy.  Andrew McCarthy.  Is it Mannequin?” he guesses.

“Nope, guess again.  I’ll give you another hint.  Beach house.”

“No way.  It’s Weekend at Bernie’s, isn’t it?”  Auggie is very proud of himself for guessing it on the second try.  “Are you missing your beach house, Jepetto?”

I didn’t even make that connection.  “I guess so.  Can we drop it, please?  I just want to sit here with my bestie and enjoy a good movie.”

“Sorry, kiddo.  Go ahead, put it on.  Let’s chill.”  I cue up the movie, pull a chair beside Auggie, and put my feet up on the bed.  For the next hour and a half, we sit, we laugh, and just enjoy each other’s company. 

As the movie comes to an end, a social worker stops in to check on Auggie.  She introduces herself, shows us her hospital I.D., and recites a list of services the hospital provides beyond medical care.  She can make referrals for counselors or therapists upon patient request.  Even though she’s not here for me, I decide to take advantage and see if she can help.

“I was wondering if you could recommend a therapist who specializes in Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.”  She looks at me, then again at Auggie.  “It’s for a friend.”

“Um, sure.  Can you tell me a little more about your
friend
?  Is it related to the armed services?  The Department of Veterans Affairs provides top-notch care for its veterans,” she explains.

“No.  It’s my boyfriend.  He was involved in a traumatic event a few months ago and now he’s experiencing some pretty severe anxiety.”  I’m afraid to give too much away.  Averee’s attack on Evan last April was big news and it wouldn’t be hard to put the pieces together.

“Okay.  I think I have an idea.  There’s someone I know who specializes in that sort of thing.”  She’s looking through her notes and fishing through her collection of business cards.

“Here it is!  I found it.”  She hands me a card with the name Dr. Walter Falkowski printed on it.  It says he specializes in treating issues related to trauma and abuse, substance abuse, ADHD, depression and anxiety.  There’s a phone number, but no address.

“Where is Dr. Falkowski’s office?  It doesn’t say.”  I’m hoping it’s close by.

“He has a private office in Spring Lake.  When you call the office, they will give you the address.  He only takes new patients by referral.”  She takes the card from me and writes her name on the back, “Tell him that Erin sent you.  He’ll make time for you right away.”

I pocket the card.  Once she leaves, Auggie and I do a little background check on Dr. Falkowski.  He’s listed in Psychology Today’s Therapist Directory.  He’s got a bunch of initials after his name.  Everything seems to check out.  We’ll see if Evan is serious about wanting to make things right.

At three thirty, I give Auggie a big kiss and a hug.  It’s time to go.  I should have just enough time to make my way to the parking garage and fight the weekend traffic through the beach. 

My mind is racing as I get closer to the beach house.  Do I knock?  Walk right in?  We broke up, sort of, and I have no claim to the house without Evan’s consent.  Fortunately, I don’t have to worry for long.  I pull into the driveway and park the car.  Before I make it as far as the front door, Evan is standing in the doorway waiting for me.  I take a few steps closer and get my first good look at him.  Holy crap, Derek’s right.  Evan looks terrible.  I stop dead in my tracks and just stare, taking in all the evidence of his combat.  His black eye is now a putrid shade of green and yellow.  His beautiful face is marred by cuts that are still healing under his eye, along his chin, and on his lip.

“It’s just bruises, Juliette.  They’ll heal.  Give it time.  Come on in, let’s talk.”  I snap out of my trance and follow him inside.  He leads me onto the deck where he has my favorite white wine chilling, a big blue bottle of Relax Riesling.  He pours a glass and hands it to me.  When he does, I get my first look at his knuckles, all covered in cuts and bruises. 

I take the glass in one hand, and grab his hand with the other, examining it more closely.  “Damn it, Evan, look at you.  What the hell is going on?”

He pulls his hand away from me.  “I know it looks pretty bad, but-“

“But nothing!  It looks bad because it is bad, Evan.  Don’t you see?  This won’t all just go away when your bruises heal.  You can’t pretend this whole thing didn’t happen.”  Evan takes a seat in one of the deck chairs, but I’m too upset to sit still. 

“I’m not.  I don’t mean to.  Damn it, Juliette, will you sit down and talk to me?  You’re making me nervous pacing around like that.”

I reluctantly sit in a nearby deck chair, take a big gulp of wine, and place the half empty glass down on the table.  “Okay, Evan, I’m here, I’m sitting down, and you have my undivided attention.  Where do you want to start?”

“I guess I should start with an apology.  I have no excuse for my behavior, Juliette.”  Evan gets up from his chair and stands directly in front of me, pleading with his eyes.  “I’m so sorry.  I said the most horrible things.  That wasn’t me.  I have never, ever, in my entire life, behaved like such a prick.”  He kneels down and takes my hands into his.  “The worst part is, I don’t even remember what I said.  It’s like I blacked out or something, and when I came out of it, everything was muddy.  Thank God Adam was there.  He told me what I did.  I was so ashamed.  I’m still ashamed.  If what Adam tells me is true, then I have no idea why you would ever agree to talk to me after the horrible things I said to you, Juliette.”

“I’m here because I’m worried about you, Evan.  You haven’t been yourself for weeks now.  It’s not just what happened on Wednesday that bothers me.  Every time I so much as talk with anyone other than you, you blow a gasket.  You even freaked out after our opening night.”

Evan interrupts me, “I didn’t freak out.  I calmly told you how I felt and you blatantly disregarded my feelings, Juliette.”

“Do you understand that what you were asking of me was unreasonable, Evan?  You must know that there was no way I could stop talking to Derek unless I fire him.  And I hope I don’t have to remind you that
we
are the reason why Derek needed a job in the first place.”  I stand up, grab my glass, and walk over to the patio bar to refill my glass.

“Of course. I don’t need to be reminded, Juliette.”  Evan’s getting agitated now, I can hear it in his voice.  He’s getting angry again.  “Not a day goes by that I don’t think about what happened.  What almost happened.  What could have happened.”  I need to get him to calm down before this gets out of control.

“I think you need to talk to someone about all this.  Someone who can help you sort through all of this and put it into perspective.”

“How is it that you used the exact same words as my mother, Juliette?  You and she are on a mission to prove there’s something wrong with me.  If you both would just leave well enough alone, things could get back to normal.  Why can’t everyone see that?”

“Wait, let me get this straight – you’re telling me that calling me a whore –”

“Hang on, I never called you a whore!” Evan interrupts.

“You may not have used those exact words, but that is precisely what you were saying, Evan.  You asked me if I was fucking two men at once, for Christ’s sake.  What the fuck was that?”

“I overreacted.”