The Salvation of Daniel (The Blue Butterfly Book 2) (21 page)

He rubbed at his face. “I know.” He laughed bitterly and shook his head. “You know. I always expected some sort of avengement to be sought after the way my life has taken its toll on others, but to be perfectly honest, I always thought it would be one of the stock, or maybe the parents of a girl, even their husbands or investigators that have been hired by the family who would be the ones to finally grant me redemption.”

I sighed and shook my head. “You think death is penance for your sins, Daniel?”

He turned to me, the faint light only showing me half of his bewildered expression. “Yes. Do you not?”

“No. Redemption is having each family member taken from you. It is giving your life for your sister’s only to find that God had been cruel anyway, mocked you and your search for salvation. It is spending hours tied to a wooden cross in the bitter elements of winter, naked, bleeding and bruised while the rats start to feast on you. It is watching someone you love being raped and beaten just because you love them. It is having your soul ripped from you when the only child you were ever to conceive is killed so fucking brutally. It is hearing the cry of someone you love so desperately tear you apart.”

He was silent, his face dropping to the floor as the forbidden words slipped from me. Why did this fucking man break every damn rule in me, tear down the walls I had erected around myself and pull truths out of me that had been buried long ago?

“And what exactly do you need to seek punishment for, swan?” I could feel his eyes boring through me, his stare penetrating my soul as he waited for my answer.

A sign for motorway services lit up on the left and I indicated, turning onto the slip road.

“We’ll stay here tonight. It’s too dangerous to carry on.” I said, ignoring his question. Luckily he didn’t push, just nodded as we pulled up to the small hotel. Sleep seemed so appealing right then. And I knew we’d both need it for what was to come.

“It was my fault,” Bullet lied as Frederik held us both before him, Gregory holding me flat to the floor as Jacob pinned Bullet down by her hair.

“What?” I gasped. “No, no, Bullet.”

“It was me, Master. I stole it!”

“Bull….” I cried out when Frederik’s boot slammed into the side of my hip, the crack loud on contact. I wedged my lips together to stop the scream that wanted to hurtle from my throat.

“Refrain from talking. You are both liars. Liars and whores. I’m holding you both accountable.”

Bullet’s eyes shot to mine. “I’m sorry,” she mouthed. I shook my head at her. I knew why she had done it, I even understood her. I would have taken the blame for her if she was pregnant, knowing what cruel torture Frederik would have lined up for us.

We both flinched when we were pulled up together, both of Frederik’s puppets knowing what he wanted without him having to even voice a command. That’s how manipulated we all were.

He walked slowly over to Bullet, his cold eyes making me shiver. He stood before her, looking over her as though she were an insect that had crawled over his food. I hated him so much. I wanted him dead. I wanted to kill him myself, and I think if it weren’t for the fact he was my lover’s father, I would have ended him by now. I had no doubt in my head I was capable. As Isaac had told me often enough, I was the most formidable Phantom of the whole clan. I also knew this was the only reason Frederik kept me alive, because I was useful to the family, not because of any compassion towards me. If he ever found out about my relationship with his son and heir, then I knew that would change with a snap of his fingers.

I flung forward when Frederik slammed his fist into Bullet’s face, knocking her to the ground. Jacob and Gregory grabbed each of my arms, holding me back.

“Master, please don’t.”

He laughed, shaking his head. “You will see what your disobedience brings, Shadow. You refuse to be controlled. So maybe making your friends take your punishment may start to control you better.” He turned back to Bullet. “You stole from me, so I think the only appropriate punishment is to steal something from you.”

My eyes remained dry, my ability to cry stripped from me years ago, as my friend took my punishment. They raped her, each of them, after they broke her frail body. One after the other they took her and then all three of them together. Bullet never shed a tear. We held each other’s eyes through the duration of both our visits to hell. Another piece of my soul shattered as her blood trailed along the ground and pooled against my foot where they had tied me to the pole that was fixed to the floor for occasions of punishment.

Their sick grunts twisted my stomach as Bullet’s silence shredded my heart. It was then that I felt my baby kick for the first time. A moment of absolute joy held me up in that moment of sheer desolation. I couldn’t close my eyes, I was made to watch what my actions for stealing some bread from the kitchens to feed my child had brought. We were all so very hungry, each one of us malnourished and weak. It was only because of this that I had managed to hide my pregnancy and I had been amazed at how my baby had even survived in the devastating condition my body was in, hence the need to steal food. Unfortunately this time we had been caught as Bullet had kept watch for me.

It was only when a solitary tear leaked from my best friend’s eye and trickled across her cheek that the vomit came. “I’m so sorry, Bullet,” I whispered. “I’m so, so sorry.”

“Connie!”

“I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry. I’m…”

“Connie!”

I jolted upright, my heart hammering in my chest, my lips tingling from the sweat dripping down my face. Placing my hands over my face I urged myself to wake.

“You were dreaming,” Daniel said. He pushed my hair from my cheeks, concern on his face. “Are you okay?”

I nodded, unable to form words as my body trembled. Slipping from the bed I walked into the bathroom and flicked on the shower, eager to wash away the sweat, and the nightmare.

The visions continued to assault me as I sat on the toilet, emptying my bladder but using it as support against the tremble in my legs.

“I love you, Shadow. I’d take anything for you,” Bullet whispered as I dabbed at her wounds with the damp cloth. “I’d die for you.”

“Connie?” Daniel’s voice snapped me out of my memories.

“What?”

He stared at me. “I said I’ll run you a bath instead.” My brow lifted when the turn of him displayed the tattoo adorning his right shoulder. A stunning blue butterfly seemed to ripple over the contours of his strong shoulders, its wings spread and almost flickering with each of his movements. The unique colour matched the reflection in my eyes, in Mae’s eyes. My eyes dropped to read the script below.

Words stuck in my throat. Pain rippled through my core but a deep feeling of something softer burrowed inside, bringing a soft smile to my lips. His love for Mae astounded me. I couldn’t hold back the feeling that she had managed to procure love before she had left. Before witnessing the tattoo, I’d struggled over whether Daniel’s love had been enough for her, but now, now the pain eased it was so very obvious Daniel had loved my sister with an engulfing force. And she deserved that.

I watched him take a complimentary sachet of bath oil and pour it under the running water. “It will help relax you.”

“Okay. Where’s the Master and what have you done with him?”

I blinked in surprise when he turned to me, his fingers choking my throat. Whoa! A smile turned my lips when I noticed the heave of his chest, and the strain in the shorts he had been sleeping in. “There he is,” I croaked out.

He lifted me effortlessly, the hold on my neck secure. I could have easily taken him, but I was enjoying the darkness that had descended. He was like Jekyll and Hyde, his mood swings frequent and sharp. I liked this side of him, it was sexy, and it turned me on to see the depravation that lived inside him.

Call me sick and twisted but after being
adapted
to enjoy pain, there was no greater pleasure than being fucked so hard and brutally that you could feel the flow of blood race around your body, adrenaline and lust driving your heart beat higher and higher as pleasure and pain poured into every nerve of your stimulated body.

He glared at me, his eyes burning a hole through me. “I buried him years ago. I don’t need him to love my daughter. I don’t need him to see the rise of the fucking sun every morning. And I don’t need him to live any more. Annie is my life, not the past. The future.”

I nodded as much as I could. “I understand.” And I did, totally. He eyed me warily when I smiled. “But maybe once in a while, when the need for a dirty fuck arises, you should let him free.”

His chest heaved with my words, his stare growing colder. “What the fuck is wrong with you?” I didn’t know whether to slap some sense into the bastard or laugh at him. “You continually push all the wrong buttons, Connie. Why? Why do you encourage me to set him free?”

His fingers loosened on my neck. I tilted my head and considered him for a moment. “You know, I think in that head of yours, you struggle to differentiate between sentiment and need. Sex and love. Life, as you say, should be lived for those around you, to consider Annie’s place in your life and adapt to her must have taken great sacrifice, and I applaud you for that. But Annie isn’t your life, Daniel. She is your heart, your family. You need to carry on living.” I held my hand up when he opened his mouth. “And yes, you say Annie gives you life, but she can never take away your past, or who you truly are.”

He continued to stare at me, his mouth open in shock at my words. I chuckled. “I’m not saying you should go out, kidnap a girl and torture her. But what I’m trying to say is, that it’s okay to be yourself now and again, as long as no one is hurt and all parties are on board.”

His face softened as he considered my words. “Daniel.” He blinked at me, swallowing hard. “You will kill yourself if you lock everything down. It will suffocate you. Annie needs you happy, or she will never be.”

His face paled slightly as he dropped his arm completely. The room seemed to sway beneath me with his next words.

“I loved her so very much,” he whispered into the silent bathroom, his sad eyes locked onto mine. “She found me, Connie.” I gulped at the despair suddenly clogging the air around us. “She found the real me, and she dragged it out of me whether I wanted her to or not.”

“And now you’re frightened if you push aside the real you for the Master that you’ll never be able to find him again?”

His slow nod made me reach out and cup the side of his face. “Do you not think that Mae fell in love with both of you, the gentle and the selfish?”

“I’m not even sure she loved me,” he confessed as he pushed his face in to my touch.

I smiled at him. “If she told you she did, then she did. She was the most honest person I know. Mae never spoke a lie just to make someone feel good about themselves, even if it got her into trouble.”

His smile grew into a grin. “I can vouch for that.”

I smiled back and tilted my head to the bath. “It’s full.”

He frowned then realised what I meant and jumped back, turning off the taps. “In.”

I shrugged and pulled my t-shirt and knickers off, smirking to myself at his amazement. His eyes wandered hungrily as I slid down, the comforting warm water easing the tension in my muscles.

“Oh God, that’s good.” He nodded and turned to leave. “Join me?”

He paused before sliding his shorts down his legs. His hard cock sprung free and he laughed when I licked my lips. “Hungry?”

“Oh, very.”

He didn’t waste time. He climbed in, one foot either side of me as he stood above me. His lips curled when he fisted his erection and started to slowly slide his hand up and down. “Get on your knees, Connie.”

I nearly fist pumped the air at the tell-tale sign of the Master. “You want me to suck your cock?”

I gasped when his hand snatched my hair and he pulled me up onto my knees, the bath water sloshing over the rim with the sudden movement. “When I give you an order, you will obey it immediately. I won’t tolerate hesitancy. And you will make sure to address me as Master.”