The Soul of the Matter (13 page)

“You can bet I'll do everything I can to see anything of the nature you've described.” Dan paused before adding, “What about consciousness? How does that relate to what you described as a ‘quantum unity'?”

“Now you're getting to the heart of things. I need to do more research into that. If I'm right, I'll have found proof of the human soul, yours included.”

“Depending on the path I'm on, that might not be good news,” Dan answered. He knew it was a flip response, but things had gone beyond the believable.

“Finding out what you're made of might help you with your path,” Stephen answered.

Dan laughed, surprisingly relaxed, pleased at the prospects ahead of him, and said, “Well, I can't imagine you proposing anything more dramatic or intriguing. You know you didn't need to say anything as extraordinary as this. Despite our recent differences, I would have provided you the security you requested, and recovered your lost data, just for the personal satisfaction of having done so and the desire to spend time with Ava. Though, obviously, I would have extracted what I could along the way.”

“It's remarkable how little you've changed,” Stephen said.

Dan finished his pint. “If what you're saying about your discoveries is right, this is for all the marbles of every game worth playing.”

“I'm glad you finally understand,” Stephen said.

“The stakes you've laid out are pretty darn high,” Dan answered. He didn't have any idea what to believe. The claims were too incredible. Stephen was either onto what he said he was, or was dangerously deluded.

“They always are, for anything really worth doing,” Stephen replied.

“Yeah, well, I'm afraid that once we're done, I'll either have lost all possibility of something to believe in—including you—or I'll find stark answers that require hard choices.”

“That's life for you. Only two possibilities. Either everything matters or nothing does. No in-between. Few people recognize that. Even atheists rarely acknowledge that no God means no morality.”

“Sometimes I wish you'd stick with science and leave the deep thoughts to the philosophers. The ability to conduct experiments and analyze quantitative data is not the same as the ability to reason.”

“You're right.”

“Now,
that
is something I've waited a long time to hear,” Dan exclaimed.

“I'm sure you'll never tire of it,” Stephen joked.

Laughing, raising their glasses toward each other, they listened as the musicians began playing “Roddy McCorley,” about the rebellion of 1798. Liam Maguire's warm, rich baritone voice, accompanied by a skillfully played guitar, filled the restaurant.

O see the fleet-foot host of men, who march with faces drawn,

From farmstead and from fishers' cot, along the banks of Ban;

They come with vengeance in their eyes. Too late! Too late are they,

For young Roddy McCorley goes to die on the bridge of Toome today.

Talking quietly below the music, Stephen said, “I always loved this song, long before I understood where the event it was based on ultimately led. It's extraordinary how seemingly remote things may be connected.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, the Irish Rebellion of 1798 led to the dissolution of the Irish government and the incorporation of their one hundred votes into the English Parliament. This was meant to quell Ireland's drive for independence. Instead, the Irish became the swing votes in the English Parliament. In order to stay in power, in the late eighteen hundreds, the British prime minister agreed to Irish Home Rule in exchange for Irish votes. Before Home Rule could be implemented, in 1912, many British were actively arming the Northern Irish Protestants in preparation for a civil war against what would have been the future Irish government. This led Germany to believe that England would not interfere on the Continent, being preoccupied with Ireland. They were wrong, and it contributed to the start of World War I. And without the First World War, Hitler doesn't come to power and the Germans have the scientists and the time to develop the atomic bomb. A strong, nuclear-armed, Germany is then free to assert itself against the world. To sum it up, without the rebellion of 1798, Germany rules the world, with many of the attitudes it had at the time.

Stephen continues, “The idea I'm exploring is whether God directs events that shape history over long periods of time. Does He paint with long, faint, brushstrokes that are only visible from a great distance, with eyes sharp enough to see them, to keep history on track? So, in the end, while our sufferings matter greatly to Him, they are not the last word, something greater is at stake.”

Dan took a moment to reply. “Haven't you already stretched well beyond the limit of what I can contemplate for one evening without
sounding like you think you can read the mind of whatever God might—and I emphasize might—exist?”

“Just giving you hints to the question you wouldn't attempt answering earlier.”

“What you have to show me better be really good to make me put up with all of this.”

“There is an important, practical, aspect to this. What are we meant to do with whatever I've discovered? How could it impact humanity? It's a heck of a responsibility.”

“If what you've said is true, it certainly would be.”

•  •  •

A couple of hours later, Dan and Stephen started walking back to Stephen's house. It was a moonless, cloudless night. The few streetlights were spaced far apart, serving more as distant beacons than as guidance for where to place their feet. In the dim spaces between the lights, the Milky Way stood out clearly from the rest of the dark sky.

Halfway home, Stephen said, “I've always enjoyed looking at the constellations. I wonder how they looked to the ancients.”

“They change over time, but slowly,” Dan answered.

“I need to remember that. You know, it's amazing just how finely tuned everything is for the universe to even exist—even more so for us.”

“Well, with an infinite number of universes, at least one should be like this.”

“You know, the belief in the existence of multiverses is an act of faith based on the idea that whatever can be represented by mathematics should in fact exist.”

“I guess you're not going to let up,” said Dan.

“I'm sorry, but when you think you start to see things as they really are, you can't stop seeing things as they really are,” Stephen said jovially.

“That's an addiction I've tried to avoid.”

“And look where that got you. Anyway, it's quite a journey we're about to embark on.”

“I prefer a sojourn,” Dan replied.

“That's not what the songs on your main playlist tell me. One
word sums them up. Plaintive. Sorry, I looked. You're searching just like the rest of us.”

“Remember listening to our first Genesis song, ‘Watchers of the Skies'? That's what I think of on a night like this,” Dan said.

“I remember listening to that when we were out on the lake late at night. The Adirondacks are great. We
really
need to get up there again,” Stephen said.

“We were naïve. I wish we could have stayed that way,” Dan said wistfully.

“As we both now know, you can't stay naïve when you start to understand that life either does or doesn't have ultimate meaning.”

“Either possibility is staggering,” Dan said with a touch of wonder in his voice.

“You're staggering.”

“I know.”

“Ah, once again, the beginning of wisdom,” Stephen said.

“You're way too repetitive. You should hire a speechwriter.”

“I'm done talking for tonight.”

“Thank God for small favors!” Dan answered.

Chapter 27

D
AY 5

T
UESDAY
M
ORNING

S
ousan's instructions from her foreign handlers at Project Icarus were clear-cut: get the fusion reaction information; make sure the reactor is damaged beyond repair; and incriminate her fellow researchers so that they would be lucky to stay out of jail, let alone be able to conduct further research. Since she had been kept in the dark by Viktor, she could claim that she was duped and, as she'd be the only “innocent” director left, she'd be appointed to run the lab.

The plan she'd come up with was to substitute a mix of tritium and deuterium for pure deuterium in the last of the planned experiments. A “deteriorating condition, present but undetected for years,” would prevent the abort button from working. This would cause a higher-yield reaction, generating enough heat to destroy the reactor, while leading to a minor release of radioactive tritium—a major breach of atomic energy regulations—and the lab's shutdown.

In the subsequent investigation, the cause would appear to be a loading error by a worker whom the investigators would be unable to find. More damning would be the determination of lax oversight and controls, poor procedures, inadequate record keeping, and reckless actions. Of course, she would provide manufactured evidence claiming that she had been reporting these shortcomings for years but had been ignored, bolstering the case for her appointment as the new head of the lab. If he was lucky, Viktor would only be forced to retire,
though he could easily face more severe consequences. Welsh would be finished, and if she had her way, would face jail time.

All in all, a simple, effective, and wonderful plan.

•  •  •

Sousan went to the loading dock and opened the doors for the delivery truck. No ordinary truck, it carried the deuterium. Unbeknownst to Viktor, this time it also carried the highly restricted and controlled tritium. The men on the truck were also not ordinary deliverymen. Like Sousan, they were agents of a foreign interest.

During the course of the delivery, they'd make adjustments to the reactor's fuel delivery system. When the time was right, Sousan would instruct the reactor systems to supplement the deuterium with tritium. The resulting reaction would produce more heat than the reactor could handle, damaging it, potentially beyond repair, setting the project back by years, enough time to give her sponsors time to make their moves.

Satisfied with the progress of the agents, Sousan returned to the lab. As soon as she was gone, the men made additional adjustments to the fuel systems and disabled more of the reactor's safety mechanisms. Whether Sousan survived or not was of no consequence to their sponsors. In fact, it would better if she did not. One less loose end that could become entangled.

Chapter 28

T
he last rays of the sun had departed some time ago, and what little dusk left wasn't far behind. Only the barest hints of wintergreen lingered on the horizon, visible to Stephen only because he was on the top floor of the HBC building. To the east, most of the sky was already black with the last remainders of light about to be extinguished.

It wouldn't be much longer until the experiments. They would prove that what he had decoded with Alex was valid, as well as show what it ultimately meant. Fusion power, as important as it was, was only an afterthought. The more important part was validating the relationship between the physical laws of the universe and the organization of biological life.

If things went as expected, his already difficult task of being the guardian of all the knowledge he possessed would become exponentially more difficult. Too much power and responsibility for him to handle. Not enough wisdom.

Nonetheless, he'd have to press ahead. Over the last few days, he'd come to realize that the path humanity was on would be its end if it didn't change soon. But misusing what was in his possession could also mean the end of humanity. Given all of this, he was surprisingly calm. He felt he was being guided, and as long as he didn't let his own failings get in the way, he'd make the right decisions.

The thought sent a strange shiver through him. He wondered if it was the same sensation Viktor had told him he'd felt during the first round of experiments. The odd thing was that Viktor said he had felt it from the outside and inside, as though something was reaching into
him and pulling at his soul, which was a remarkable statement, since Viktor did not believe in the soul in the literal, nonmaterial sense.

Stephen dismissed the feeling of the strange shiver. Given what he was facing, there would certainly be a lot more sensations, some decidedly unpleasant, in the months and years to come.

For now, he wanted to appreciate joy whenever he could. Energy independence, from unlimited, clean sources was important, but it was one small, modest step in the transformation that he knew was to come. After fusion, there would be many more physics breakthroughs. The proving out and applying what he had was relatively straightforward for the right people, though the impact would be great. But this was small compared to the biology side, his area of expertise. Even with the complete set of decoded information, biology required understanding the behavior of an enormous number of elements with complex behaviors within an even more complex system. And then there was the question of cellular regulatory mechanisms. Were some based on more than physical matter? How did this relate to the soul? What made a person a whole being?

He still hoped that there was a third set of information and that it would provide the guidance he needed, though he feared what it might also reveal.

Throughout his life, he had often lived by the principles “Don't ask a question unless you want to hear the answer,” and “It's easier to ask forgiveness than permission.” Seeing a third set of information might violate both those principles and place him in a position where a lot would have to be sacrificed.

He was thankful Dan was helping him. After the past weekend, he knew, as he had hoped, that he could depend on him. The value of close friendship wasn't in liking the same things or always getting along, but in the willingness and appreciation of doing whatever was needed to truly help the other, and liking the person despite differences. He was grateful to have that again with Dan and pleased that they were back on a decent path.

The days since the Cape had been good for their friendship. Dan had continued to provide more computer security support, showing
him how to organize and store his information. Though pressed for time, they had gotten together a few times as well.

As promised, soon Stephen would share everything with him. He knew Dan would eventually come around and see things in the right light. They would be in this together, and Stephen would value Dan's perspective. Together, they'd figure out the future.

Stephen decided that the one mistake he wasn't going to make again was to think that he alone always knew what was best. He would make sure to trust those that he should.