The Unfailing Light (15 page)

As soon as the empress and the grand duchess left, we had to return to our classes. Madame Orbellani handed me the box of medical supplies and asked me to take them to Sister Anna.

On my way to the nurse’s office, I passed the headmistress’s parlor and overheard two women’s voices.

“See to it that she does not leave the school grounds again, not even when the spell is lifted for the ball next week.”

“Of course, Your Imperial Majesty.”

The empress spotted me. “Katerina Alexandrovna, I wish to speak to you. Madame Tomilov, you may leave us.”

The headmistress’s voice shook slightly. “Yes, Your Imperial Majesty.”

Willing myself not to show any fear, I entered the parlor and curtsied. The empress was a short woman, but there was nothing petite about her. Her power radiated off of her, filling the whole room with her presence. Her dark-brown eyes bore into me before she spoke. “My wish is that every student here at Smolny remains safe.”

“Of course, Your Imperial Majesty.”

“The spell was tried severely when Ella took her foolish sister Alix through with only the protection of a family heirloom. If she thinks she can pull that stunt every full moon, she is very much mistaken.”

Before I could even begin to wonder what she meant by “every full moon,” she continued. “I will be lifting the spell for the Smolny Ball, but you are to remain here, Katerina. The Order of St. Lazarus has requested that you stay.”

I felt like I’d been kicked in the chest. “The Order?”

“Your creatures are here to protect you, of course. From the lich tsar. Their commander feels they can keep you safer here than anywhere else in St. Petersburg.”

“They are not my creatures, Your Imperial Majesty.” I was shocked at myself for speaking in such a way to my empress, but all I could think of was not being able to see George.

“They serve the tsar, of course,” she replied with a hint of
disdain in her voice. “But they protect you because you are the rightful owner of the talisman.”

I’d surrendered the Talisman of Isis to the tsar at Peterhof. I wanted nothing more to do with it or its dark powers of necromancy. “I cannot attend the Smolny Ball?” I asked. I could not believe the Order of St. Lazarus had anything to do with her decision.

“Not this year,” the empress said, her face softening only a little. “You must agree that it’s for the best. You are a danger to him, as well as to yourself.”

George. She would do everything she could to keep us apart. And she was right. I was a danger to him. But I wasn’t the only danger. “Your Imperial Majesty, I’ve heard alarming stories about the grand duke in Paris. Is he safe?”

The empress narrowed her eyes at my familiarity. “The grand duke is doing important work for the tsar,” she said. “The Light Court has allies guarding him closely while he finishes his work there.”

I was able to breathe a little easier, knowing this. Even if I would not be able to see him. Perhaps it was for the best. But I hated it all the same.

The empress swiftly dismissed me, and I was allowed to return to my errand. I delivered my package to Sister Anna and hurried back to class.

As I slid into my seat next to Elena in Madame Orbellani’s room, the Montenegrin princess whispered, “I hope the tsarevitch dances with me again. Do you know he has not answered any of my letters since the first one?”

I could not believe Elena would do something so foolish. “You wrote to the tsarevitch? How could you be sure the letter
would reach him? The imperial guard has probably given your letters to the tsar. Or the empress.”

“She does not like me,” Elena muttered. “But she will. I know she will, once she sees how happy I can make Nicholas Alexandrovich.”

“
Ecoutez
, mesdemoiselles,” Madame Orbellani warned.

I wanted to tell Elena she was deluding herself, but what could I say? I’d been deluding myself as well. The empress had no love for me either. Neither of us would ever be welcome in the Light Court. I grasped her hand and gave it a friendly squeeze. “I think one day soon you will find someone else that suits you better.”

“But my parents have been hoping for a match between me and the tsarevitch for years. I have dreamed about my wedding for so long I cannot imagine anyone else as my groom.”

I didn’t know what to say. I wasn’t sure if Elena loved Nicholas because she wanted to be the next empress or because it would please her parents. Elena was a romantic who believed in the power of true love, but she was also the daughter of a blood drinker, and a shape-shifting witch. I was scared of her, but couldn’t help feeling a little sorry for her at the same time.

CHAPTER NINETEEN
 

I
was summoned into the headmistress’s parlor that evening. Madame Tomilov looked up at me sternly. “Katerina Alexandrovna, I have heard some troublesome news, young lady. One of the staff has told me that you tried to leave the institute grounds last night.”

Mon Dieu!
Who on earth would lie to the headmistress about me? “Of course not, Madame. Any of my roommates can tell you the truth. I was asleep all night.”

“And why wouldn’t this person speak the truth?” Madame Tomilov glared at me. I had never seen her mad before. Especially not at me. “Katerina, I know you were having some difficulty adjusting at the beginning of the school term, but you cannot break the Smolny rules. These rules have been put in place for your safety. I have decided your punishment will be forbidding you from attending the Smolny Ball.”

This was part of the empress’s plan. She had told the
headmistress to punish me, and this is what my classmates would be told when they found out I was not going to the ball. I clasped my hands in defeat. “Of course, Madame,” I whispered, trying very hard not to cry in front of her. I was too old for such displays of emotion. No matter how upset I was.

“Very well.” Madame Tomilov picked up a pen and began writing in her ledger. “You may return to your class now.”

I stood up, wiping my eyes with the back of my hand.

Madame Tomilov glanced up at me. “It’s for your own protection, Katerina.”

I nodded and turned to go. She knew the empress had forbidden me to leave the institute. Madame also knew I had not tried to leave the grounds last night. That was small comfort. I still felt as if I’d been betrayed.

CHAPTER TWENTY
 

I
t was humiliating when Elena and the others found out I was not attending the ball. I could not tell anyone the truth, so I shrugged and scowled and pouted a lot. I hoped I would be able to spend the evening looking for the ghost again. I sat on my bed and pretended to read my Greek poetry while Alix, Elena, and Aurora got dressed.

“And where did you think you needed to sneak out to?” Elena hadn’t stopped fussing at me all day. “Of all the stupid things to do, Katerina! Missing the ball!”

“Perhaps she does not enjoy parading around in front of thousands of strangers,” Alix said. She was calmly pinning up her hair, but I could see she looked a little pale. I knew she was nervous about her first Smolny Ball.

“My dear Hessian princess,” Elena said, twirling around in her white dress and looking at herself in the tiny mirror, “that is the best part.”

I rolled my eyes. I wanted to get a message to Grand Duchess Xenia, but there was no one I trusted to deliver it. Not Alix and definitely not Elena. I had considered sneaking out to the ball anyway, but what would I accomplish? I would only anger the empress even more, and for what? Petya should have been able to get word to George by now. I had sent my brother a letter written in the same code as his, begging for more information, but had heard nothing from him. In the end, I decided it was better for me to use my time at Smolny alone to investigate the ghost in the library.

I pretended to yawn. “I hope you three do not wake me when you come home.”

“I suppose we’ll have to tell you all about the festivities in the morning,” Elena said. “Sweet dreams, Katerina.”

“Have a wonderful time,” I said.

I heard Elena say “Hmmph!” as she stomped off down the hallway, with a definitely nervous Alix and an excited Aurora following along behind her. I snuggled down under my covers and read until I was sure everyone had left for the ball.

When the school was silent, I slid back out of bed and headed for the library. I could hear people talking in the kitchen.

“It came out of nowhere, Madame,” said Masha, the school cook.

“Don’t be ridiculous. It’s a frying pan. It had to come from somewhere.” It was the headmistress’s voice. Something very bad must have happened for her to be up this late.

“Olga was washing the pots. The frying pan came at her from the other side. There was no one else here with us.”

“Get someone to clean this mess up. Olga, can you stand up?” I heard the kitchen girl moan in reply. Madame Tomilov sighed. “Masha, can you fetch Sister Anna?”

If the ghost was throwing frying pans at people, she was becoming dangerous. I slipped past the kitchen and hurried on to the library before Masha came out and the headmistress could see me.

The library was one of the few rooms in the entire institute that had an electric light. I flipped the switch, and the room was flooded with a dim glow. It was empty, of course. All of the younger girls had gone to bed hours earlier. Everything was in its place, the books lined up neatly on the shelves, the cushion sitting perfectly on the chair, the magazines in a neat stack on the end table. I sat down in the chair and closed my eyes, wondering if the ghost was finished with her hauntings for the night. The forbidding presence I’d felt last week was gone. “Marija?” I whispered, afraid the headmistress would hear me. “Are you in here with me?”

Silence.

“Marija?”

There was a soft sound, like someone exhaling. A heavy breath. The forbidding feeling was coming back. The impulse to get up and leave the room. She was definitely here.

I had no idea what to do with a ghost, especially when I could not see the cold light. “Marija, I’d like to talk with you. You need to stop frightening the girls. You can’t stay here anymore.”

The soft hissing sound grew louder. She was becoming angry. I shook my head. “I can’t leave until we’re finished talking, Marija. Why did you hurt the kitchen girl tonight?”

Suddenly, I was struck across the face with a force that knocked me back in the chair. I yelled out.

My cheek stung. I scrambled up out of the chair. I could still see nothing else in the room with me. The forbidding presence was overwhelming. I felt it closing in around me, as if trying to smother me. I backed away toward the door. “You cannot keep hurting people, Marija! You have to leave!”

“What in the name of the saints is going on here?” I heard Madame Tomilov’s voice as she stomped down the hallway toward the library.

The pressure on me did not let up as I reached the doorway and backed into the headmistress.

“Katerina Alexandrovna! What is the meaning of this?”

Sister Anna arrived right behind Madame Tomilov. “Child, what happened to your face?” she asked. She looked frightened as she stared at me.

I put my hand up to my cheek. “Did she leave a mark?”

“Who did this to you?” Madame’s voice was stern. She grabbed my chin and tilted my head up so she could examine my face more closely.

“I …” What could I say? “I think it was the ghost.”

Madame closed her eyes as she sighed. Behind her I heard Sister Anna gasp,
“Mon Dieu!”
and she crossed herself.

“What did you think you were doing in here?” the headmistress asked.

“I just wanted to get a book. I couldn’t sleep.” Part of what I told her was true, at least.

“Go back to bed, Katerina. I’m sure this will all seem like a terrible dream in morning.”

She was not going to admit that I’d been attacked by the
ghost. Which meant that all of the girls at Smolny were in danger. I turned around and took one last look in the library. The presence still seemed to be in there, waiting. But I had no desire to communicate with her again.

“
Oui
, Madame,” I said finally to the headmistress, and went back to my bedroom.