The Wedding Gift (26 page)

By the time you receive this letter, your daughter and your bastard grandson will be on their way to you. I am returning her because she gave birth today to a son who is not mine.

 

“It cannot be. Why do they hate her? My darling girl must be in a lot of pain after the birth, and yet they forced her to travel when she should be confined to her bed. It cannot be. I agree with you. He is lying. Of course he is. They just want more field hands. How could they be so greedy?”

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

SARAH CAMBELL

WE WERE MAKING SUPPER WHEN THE OVERSEER arrived to tell me that, commencing the next morning at nine o’clock, I had to take Mr. Julius Cromwell, who had been spending more time at home, his morning tea to his apartment.

“But sir, I….”

“Be careful what you say or I’ll report to Mr. Cromwell that you questioned his authority.”

When I told Clarissa, I was surprised by what she said.

“Sarah, just obey them. There is no use arguing. Anyway, it’s only another tray that you have to carry in the morning.”

Isaac’s statements that evening similarly disappointed me.

“Sarah, why do you think you shouldn’t have to do whatever they tell you to do? What’s wrong with you? Are you trying to get a whipping?”

“Its just that I don’t want to be alone with him in his bedroom.”

“He has that woman in town, and he’s not interested in you that way.”

“I hope that’s true, Isaac. I really do.”

The next morning, I knocked on Julius’s bedroom door.

“Enter. Put the tray on the table. Please pour a cup of tea and bring it to me.”

He was sitting in a chair by a window, wearing a robe over his sleeping garments. I handed him the tea and stood in front of him with my head bowed, waiting to be dismissed.

“Look at me, Sarah. Yes, as I thought. Other than the fact that yours are brown and hers are blue, you have similar eyes. Quite lovely. Your hair, what does it look like? Why do you always have it covered with a dreadful scullery maid’s rag? Well? I don’t suppose you’d like to remove that cloth so that I can see your hair?”

“No, sir.”

“Why not?

“I never take my head covering off, sir.”

“Not even for your husband?”

I did not reply.

“You look even prettier when you blush. You are shy, aren’t you? So unlike your sister. All right, Sarah, you may leave. Until tomorrow.”

I had never been so grateful to leave the presence of any of my masters or mistresses as I was that day. Relief, however, turned into dread that night as I thought about what he would say or do the next morning. I wanted to tell someone, but I knew that there was no sympathetic ear.

For the next two weeks, each morning was similar to the first. He made comments about my appearance and asked me when he was going to have the pleasure of seeing me without my head covering. I stood before him, saying little, as he sat holding his cup of tea. As time passed, I became less frightened of him. That is, until the morning his language changed.

“How long are you going to continue this pretense of being a shy little girl? Answer. I’ve had enough of your silence.”

I stared at the floor. He stood and lifted my chin. His touch startled me.

“Sarah, I will never force you to do anything, but you know that I could, that forcing you is within my purview. If you consent to what I am going to propose, you will no longer have to be Clarissa’s maid and you won’t have to work in the kitchen, as your responsibility will be to care for me. Look at your hands. You’re ruining them. When the new house is completed, my apartments will be on the opposite side of Clarissa’s. You will have all the pretty dresses you want. What is it? Are you worried about Isaac? I can keep him busy by hiring him out, you know. What do you say, Sarah? All right, I don’t have to have your answer today. Promise me you’ll give me your reply soon. Sarah?”

“Yes, sir.”

He asked me the next morning whether I had made a decision.

“Sir, I can’t do what you asked me. I just can’t.”

“It’s Isaac that you’re worried about, isn’t it? I’ll give you more time. You’ll see. There would be so many advantages to accepting my proposal. Remember, your work will increase once Clarissa has the baby. By the way, you’re not expecting are you?”

“Sir?”

“Never mind. That’s not important at this juncture, but it is something else you should consider, the fate of your children when you bear them. I could free you and your children, you know. I see that sparked an interest. Very well. Yes, Sarah, that is something I could do. What do you say?”

“Sir, I will think about it.”

Mr. Cromwell appeared to lose patience, but strangely, he also seemed amused by my refusal to tell him what he wanted to hear.

It was nighttime, one week later, in early June. I was asleep on a cot in Clarissa’s bedroom when she screamed.

“Oh, that hurt. That really hurt. Sarah, I think the baby is coming. Tell them to send for the doctor.”

She managed to speak between crying and taking short breaths. I went into the adjoining room to change into a dress.

“Hurry. Oh, this hurts so much.”

By the time the physician arrived, Clarissa’s water had broken. Her labor lasted over fourteen hours. When the baby was born, Dr. Walker suctioned his nostrils and cut the umbilical cord, and the child cried and turned pink. Dr. Walker told Jessie, the other maid assisting him, and me to wash and swaddle the infant.

“No, give him to me now,” Clarissa said.

“Wash his face first, and cover her with a sheet,” he said to me before he departed.

Clarissa took her son and asked for a wet cloth, which she used to clean his head and hands. “My angel. Yes, that’s what you are, my angel on earth. Mama loves you.” She caressed his back. “Sarah, tell my mother that his name is Theodore.”

“You can tell her that yourself when she gets here, Miss Clarissa.”

“Sarah, do you remember how happy we were when we were children?”

I said nothing.

“Weren’t we happy when we played in the nursery and I had lessons?”

“Yes, we were happy then.”

“That’s how I always want you to remember me.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“Look at him. What do you think they’re going to do to me and my baby, Sarah?”

“I don’t think they’re going to do anything bad to you.”

“Sarah, they’re going to punish me, but I won’t let them hurt my baby. I’ll try to convince Julius to let you take the baby to my mother. Please, Sarah, I know it’s a lot to ask of you, but will you promise me that you’ll get my baby to her?”

I hesitated.

“Sarah, I’ll give you a letter asking Papa to free you if you do this for me. Will you?”

“Yes, Miss Clarissa, I’ll do whatever I can.”

There was a knock and the door opened. Mrs. Cromwell, Julius, and Dr. Walker entered. Mrs. Cromwell told me to hold the baby, but Clarissa refused to give him to me.

“All right, then, turn him around so that we can see his face,” Mrs. Cromwell said.

Clarissa reluctantly agreed.

“Yes, Dr. Walker, I see what you mean. You two wash her and him and clean this room,” Mrs. Cromwell said.

We persuaded Clarissa to give us the child so that we could follow Mrs. Cromwell’s orders. Moments later, the overseer knocked on the door, and when I answered it, he told Jessie and me to go outside the room.

“Mrs. Cromwell said that you are not to repeat anything about the birth to anyone, do you hear? And you are not to allow any other servants in this room. Sarah, Mr. Julius Cromwell wants you to tidy yourself and go to his office in an hour.”

He was at his desk when I arrived. He told me to sit.

“Sarah, you look as if you need to sleep. I will not keep you long. Have you given thought to my proposal? Sarah? Answer me.”

“Sir…no, I haven’t thought about it.”

“That is not what I wanted to hear. I have thought of little else. All right, I will tell you something in confidence that, right now, only my parents and I know. I’m telling you this because it directly affects you. I am sending Clarissa and her son to her parents. You are not surprised, are you?”

“No, sir. I suppose not.”

“Do you prefer to wait until she departs to give me your answer? Sarah, why is this not an easy decision for you? Think: when she is gone, you won’t have to play second fiddle to her. I’ll expect your answer when she leaves.”

“Sir, may I ask, when are you sending her to Allen Estates?”

“I will allow her to recuperate a few days. Commencing immediately, Jessie will be her maid and you will not have to work in the kitchen. Your only duty will be to attend to me.”

“Does Miss Clarissa know your plans?”

“No, and you are not to tell her. In fact, I don’t want you to go to her room. I will speak with her tomorrow morning.”

Isaac was there when I went to our cabin.

“Clarissa had the baby.” I was so exhausted that I lay on the bed with my clothes on.

“That’s what they said at the stables and in the kitchen.”

“Yes, Jessie and I helped the doctor.”

“You’re not saying much.”

“I’m really tired and the overseer told us not to say anything about the baby’s birth.”

“Why not?”

“I suppose I can tell you. The doctor said that the baby looks like he was born after a nine-month pregnancy.”

“Oh? He can really tell that?”

“He’s a big baby, and long too.”

“Did Mr. Cromwell see the baby?”

“Yes, and his mother.”

“What did they say?”

“Nothing.”

I could barely keep my eyes open and went to sleep. I spent the next day cleaning Julius’s apartment. He did not ask me anything about his proposal when I saw him. That evening, Isaac said that an overseer told him to prepare Clarissa’s carriage. I learned the significance of the carriage the following morning, when I took Julius his tea.

“Sarah. My darling Sarah. Tell me, how much sway does Clarissa have with her father? Could she persuade him to overlook what she has done?”