The Widow Finds Love (Mail Order Bride Series) (10 page)

One week into her fourth month, Sarah awakened in the middle of the night, with
horrible cramps.  She shook Clint awake.  When he saw her face, contorted in pain, he knew something was wrong.

“What is it?” he asked, his brow creased with worry.

“Something bad is wrong.  You had better get the doctor,” she gasped as another cramp hit her.  “Try not to wake the girls, it would scare them to see me this way.” 

He dressed quickly.  “I’ll cut across the fields and get Suzy, then I’ll go into town and get the doctor.  Is there anything I can do before I go?”

“You might put the chamber pot closer to the bed, but Clint, please hurry.  This is bad.”

He ran out of the house and saddled the horse and struck out across the fields to his sister’s house.  He pounded on the door.  Arthur came to the door in his nightgown.  “What’s wrong?   You look terrible.”

“It’s Sarah.  She’s in a lot of pain.  Tell Suzy Sarah needs her.  I’m going after Doc Stone.”

“I’ll get Suzy, you just get the doctor.  Suzy will be there is 20 minutes,” Arthur said as he retreated into the house.

Back on his horse, Clint rode into Marshall as fast as his mount could carry him.  He ran to the front door and banged on the door frame.  His pounding was answered by Doc Stone.  “Doc, it’s Sarah.  She’s in a lot of pain and is really having cramps.  Suzy should be on her way there by now.  We need you, Doc.”

“It sounds as if she’s trying to miscarry.  You get on back.  Emily and I will be there as quick as we can.”

“Is there anything we can do before you get there?”

“No.  Just be there and let her know you care.  She’s going to be quite emotional, so your behavior is important.  Now, go.”  The doctor went back inside to get his medical bag and get dressed.

Clint went into his house through the kitchen and into the bedroom.  Sarah was sitting up in bed, while Suzy sat on the side,  “Are you still in pain?” he asked his wife.

“Not as much,” she answered.  Her eyes were moist and her cheeks were streaked with the tracks of tears.

“Doc Stone and Emily should be the way by now.  They should here in a few minutes,” he said.

Fifteen minutes later, Doctor Stone and his wife strode into the room.  “Clint, if you would leave us, I’ll check her over.”
“Would you please check on the girls?  I’m surprised all of this commotion hasn’t awakened them,” Sarah asked.

“I’ll go check, honey,” he said.  He went down the hall and went into Cassie and Rebecca’s bedroom.  They were both still asleep, so he didn’t bother them. 

He went into the kitchen and started a fire in the stove.  He got the makings of coffee out, filled the percolator and set it on the stove.  He was wide awake and worried.  He had no need for the stimulant, but it was something to do.

The doctor came out of the bedroom and into the kitchen.  Clint poured a cup of coffee for him.  “She lost the baby,” Doc Stone said.  “She has lost a good bit of blood, but she will be all right in a few days.  It is a shock to their body and mind when a woman loses a baby.  In many cases, they do a lot of self examining, and blame themselves for the loss.  Unless there has been a fall or injury, and that has not been the case here, we don’t know what causes a miscarriage.  Some women have more than one, others never have one.

“She’s going to need you more than ever now.  There’s no way of knowing how long it will take for her to accept it.”

“Doc, I’m asking this out of ignorance.  What should we do with the baby?”

“I would suggest you bury it in your family plot.  Sarah will never forget it, and nor will you.  Having a burial site will give you a place to remember it.  It might also help Sarah.”

“Thanks, Doc.  I’ll take care of it.  I won’t do anything until I can talk to Sarah about it.

“What do I need to do for her besides being there?”

“Physically, she should be okay after a few days.  Not as long as it would be if she carried full term,” Doc said.

“Can she still have another baby?” Clint asked.

“I think so, but that is going to be up to her, whether she wants one or not.”

The doctor and Emily left after one last check on Sarah.  Suzy was sitting with her brother.  “I’ll stay and help with the girls until Sarah is up and about.  Naturally, she is quite upset, but she finally fell asleep.  She’s probably going to cry a lot.  I know I did.”

“I didn’t know you had a… lost a baby,” he said.

“We didn’t tell anyone.  It would have been our middle son.”

“Sis, did you bury him?”

“Yes, we did.  Arthur made a small box, it wasn’t but about three inches long.  We put the box in among the rose bushes in the front yard.”

“And you went through all of that with just you and Arthur?”

Her brimming eyes recalled the sadness of her loss.  “Actually, Ruth knew.  It was when you were away in the war.”

He put his arm around her.  “I’m so sorry this happened to you and I wasn’t there to help you through it.”

“Pay me back by helping Sarah.  You have one fine lady there and she’s going to need you.”

“I will, and thank you for telling me about it.  Would you mind if I told Sarah?”

“If you think it might help, or it might be better if I tell her about it.  It might help her to know I understand,” Suzy said.

“I’m going to go in there now.  I want to be there when she wakes up,” he said.

“Good idea.  I’ll keep check on the girls,” she said.

* * *

Sarah opened her eyes.  The shapes in the room were fuzzy at first, but Clint wasn’t.  He had dragged the chair close to the bed and was sitting there, his eyes studying her intently.

When he saw her open her eyes, he took her hand.  “Hey there, you,” he said.

“Clint,  I lost our baby.  I’m so sorry,” she said and started crying.  He stood and sat on the side of the bed, and buried his head in the hollow between her neck and shoulders.

“Hush now.  It wasn’t your fault.  Doc says they don’t know what causes it, but it happens.  He knows of nothing we could have done that caused it or nothing we could have done to prevent it.  What matters is that you get well, and you know your family loves you.”

“How do I tell the girls there isn’t going to be a little brother?” she asked.

“We’ll just tell them it wasn’t time for us to have another baby, but maybe some day.”

“What if it happens again?  It’s so hard, knowing the life I carried is gone,” she said.

“We have two girls.  Two special girls.  Whether we add to the family is up to you.  Whatever you want.”

There was a knock on the door.  “Come in,” Clint called out.

Suzy stuck her head in the door.  “Cassie and Rebecca are awake.  Would you like for them to come in?  I told them you were sick, Sarah.”

“Thank you, Suzy.  Please, let them come in,” Sarah said.

Cassie and Rebecca walked into the room.  Rebecca came to the bed where Clint picked her up and held her so she could kiss her mother.

Cassie held back.  “Mama, are you going to die?” she asked in a voice barely above a whisper.

“No, honey, I’m not going to die.  I’m going to be here with you and Rebecca.  I have to see you get married, and I’m going to make your wedding dress.”

“Good.  I don’t want you to die.  I want you to get all better,” Cassie said.

“I will, now you go help Aunt Suzy fix breakfast.  She might not know where everything is.”

The two girls bounced out of the room.  “What a pair we have,” Sarah said.

“Amen to that,” Clint said.  “Suzy is going to stay for a few days until you feel better.”

“That’s nice of her, but I don’t think it’s necessary,” she said.

“Maybe not, but she wants to and I don’t think she’ll take no for an answer.  Do you feel up to coming in for breakfast, or would you like for me to bring you a plate?”

“Breakfast in bed?  You’re going to spoil me.”

“You’re already spoiled, but I’m going to make it worse,” he said and bent to kiss her.

Suzy fixed a plate for Sarah, and said, “Let me take it in.  I want to talk to her a bit.”

She carried the plate
into the bedroom and handed it to Sarah, who had propped herself up against the pillow and the headboard.  Sitting in the chair Clint had dragged to the bedside, she said, “Sarah, I’m going to tell you something nobody knows about except Clint, Arthur and me, not even Mama.  I just told Clint this morning.  I had a miscarriage in between Micah and Paul.  I was so ashamed, I thought it was all my fault, but over time, I realized it was God’s will and not something I had done.  You can see, we went on and had Paul, but we would have had three sons.

“Arthur made a little box and we buried it in the rose bed.  It was hard, and I cried a lot.  I still get all weepy when I let myself think about it.  It’s over and done with, but I lost a son and I can never forget it.  You can get through this and I want to help.”

Her eyes moist with tears, Sarah clasped Suzy’s hands between hers and said, “Thank you for sharing this with me.  It must have been hard for you, but I appreciate it, and I’ll take you up on the help.  I need all I can get.”

Both of the women were crying.  Suzy wiped her eyes on her apron and said, Eat your food before it gets stone cold.  I’ll go see to the girls.”

“Thank you, Suzy,” Sarah said. 

It was three months after her miscarriage when Sarah said, “Clint, I think I’m
expecting again.  My bleeding hasn’t started.  I think we’re going to have a baby.  We’d better go in and see Doctor Stone.  I don’t want to take any chances.  I want this baby,” she said fiercely…

“I don’t want to tell the girls for a while yet.  I don’t want to jinx this and have them get their hopes up too,” Sarah said.

“Nothing’s going to go wrong this time.  We’re going to have a big old Texas boy,” he said.

“All the same, I’d rather not tell them yet,” she said.

* * *

“I want this baby, Doctor.  I need this baby.”

“And you’ll have it,” said Doctor Stone after completing his examination.  “You’ll carry it to term and you’ll have a robust and healthy child.”

“I hope so, Doctor.  I sincerely hope so.”

At her six month checkup, Doctor Stone said, “Everything looks good to me.  Your weight is good, your blood pressure is good.  You seem to be in perfect health.”  He gave her the same report in each of the following months.

Sarah was in bed with her two daughters.  She took Rebecca’s hand and placed it on her belly.  The baby moved.  “Did you feel that?” she asked.  Rebecca nodded her head.  “That’s your little brother stretching.”

Rebecca’s eyes widened in wonder.  “He moved again,” she said.

“Let me, I want to feel my brother move, Mama,”  Cassie said.

Sarah pulled her dress up where her expanded belly was exposed.  “Now, watch closely,” she said.  A small ridge formed and moved slowly across her belly.  “That’s his foot moving,” she said. 

“Really?” asked Cassie.  “When is he going to get borned?” asked Cassie.

“It will be between Thanksgiving and Christmas,” Sarah said.  “Won’t it be nice to have a new baby for Christmas?”

“Yes,” chorused the girls.

“What is it, Cassie?” Sarah asked, seeing concern on her face.

“Will you still love Becky and me, when you get a new baby?”

“Well, of course,” Sarah said.  “Don’t you know nothing can take your place in my heart?  You two are the most precious things in my life and you always will be.  I have plenty of love for everyone.”

Six weeks later, Jonathon Clinton Thomas announced his entrance into the world with a loud cry as the doctor handed him to Emily to be wiped clean.  Emily wiped his face and arms, and then wrapped him in a blue receiving blanket.  “Your son is perfect, Sarah.  Ten fingers and ten toes, and everything moves.  You hold him, I’m going outside to tell Clint and your daughters,” Emily said.

“You have a son, Clint.  He’s a healthy, strong boy.  Sarah is tired, but she is fine.  It was an easy delivery, if there is such a thing.  You can take the girls in to see them for a few minutes.  Sarah is probably going to be going to sleep pretty soon.”

Suzy came out and hugged her brother.  “It’s good, Clint.  Your son is beautiful.”  Turning to the two girls, “You are now big sisters.  You will need to help your mother take care of him,” she said.

When they walked into the bedroom, Sarah gave them a tired smile, as she pulled the blanket back so they could see the baby’s head.  “Isn’t he beautiful?” she asked.

To her husband, she said, “We did it.  We have a son.  The Thomas family is so blessed, we need to give thanks.”

They bowed their heads as Clint said, “Dear Heavenly Father, we thank you for giving us this fine, healthy boy and for taking care of Sarah during this time.  We thank you for all of the blessings you have bestowed upon us.  Amen”

Sarah echoed, “Amen.”