The Wild Rose of Kilgannon (20 page)

Hours later Matthew was released as promised and he found us as we walked east with the others, his eyes anguished and his shoulders sagging. Angus embraced his son without a word, the two of them united in their misery. Matthew said he'd not been mistreated, but his manner told otherwise and I held him to me with fresh heartache. I had no more success in consoling him than I'd had with his father. He said he'd been told Gilbey would be held until the ship sailed with Alex on it.

We stood on the side of a hill above the Firth with a small group of solemn people, the cold seeping into our bones. Behind me a woman sobbed
relentlessly
and a baby started wailing. The wind whipped the plaid from my head and lashed my hair into my face, but I barely noticed. Angus shifted and Matthew hoisted Jamie onto his shoulders. A man said it was so wintry it did not feel like June, but I thought the bitter wind appropriate. Our leave-taking at Kilgannon had been wrenching, but this one filled me with despair. I might never see him again, I thought. He will go hundreds of miles away, without a friend to speak for him, alone In a country filled with those who
cry
for his blood. And his enemies will try to kill him while I wait In Scotland.

How quickly our four years had flown by and how foolish we had been not to treasure each moment with each other. Had we known what a short time we would have together, we would have
savoured
every day, every sunset, every night in each other's arms. Alex, I thought, my love. How can they take you from me and leave me standing on this hill In the closing of the day?

The ships started to move and one by one headed east toward the sea. My eyes never left them as they made their way down the Firth into the gathering gloom. The five of us were among the few left when the ships approached the headland and turned, and when the last ship disappeared, I sank to the ground and wept.

T
HE MORNING AFT
ER ALEX SAILED HAD DAWNED SUNNY AND
W
ARM
, as though Edinburgh were at long last celebrating summer. But I paid no attention. Anguish and fear washed over me in alternating waves. I knew the overwhelming sense of loss would never leave me; I wore it like a second skin. Robert had brought us back from watching Alex's ship sail, wordlessly handing me and the boys into his coach. He then climbed in himself, sitting between Angus and Matthew in silence. I had not argued when he'd brought us to his house, but had retreated at once to my room, keeping the boys with me. Matthew slept across our door and Angus elsewhere, but Robert had left at once.

I'd not slept, but spent the night in a chair before the fire, trying to determine how I'd get to England. If Alex was going to London, I'd go there as well. Angus and Matthew left at dawn to see what they could find out about the Mary Rose's seizure. To keep my sanity I kept myself busy. I had determined that I could not spend another moment in Robert's house and hurried the boys into packing, then harried the Campbells into bringing my luggage below. We were ready to leave as soon as Angus and Matthew returned from their visit to the ship. And to the lawyer. I'd reminded Angus, who had forgotten, that the Mary Rose was my personal property, not Alex's, bought with my dowry and kept in my name, as Alex had insisted years ago. I wanted Kenneth Ogilvie, Alex's lawyer, to confirm that she could not be seized as Alex's property, and Angus had gone to see him.

But neither Angus nor Matthew returned. Robert did. He arrived in the late afternoon and I was summoned to him at once. When I entered the room, he was standing by the window and turned a grim face to me.

"Mary," he said, "your luggage is downstairs. Are you leaving this house?" I nodded. "Where do you think you can find shelter in this city?" His tone was quiet but I knew he was very angry.

I sighed. "Robert, it is no longer proper for me to stay here."

"Why? Nothing has changed."

"
Everything
has changed." He turned back to the window. "Robert," I said, pleading. He did not respond and I moved to stand next to him, placing my hand on his arm. He watched me glacially. "Robert, please. I must go," I said softly. "I thank you for all your kindness and your generosity, but I cannot stay here. Surely you can see that. I must go." He was silent and I turned away, tears in my eyes. After a moment Robert turned to me.

"Where will you go?"

I met his eyes. "To London."

"How?"

"I don't know yet," I said, "but I will get there. I'm going to go to the Mary Rose now and get her released. And then I'll go to London."

"And then what?" He frowned and held his hands up in anger. "And then what, Mary? What can you hope to accomplish?"

"I will continue to try to free Alex."

"Unlikely at best."

"Yes."

"You know what will happen. Why would you want to be there to watch it?"

"I no longer know what will happen. I could not have predicted that we'd be where we are now, and I have no idea of what the future will bring." I sighed. "But he's my husband and I love him. I must toy." The silence stretched between us. "Robert," I said, "I do thank you. For everything. I am mindful of your sacrifices for me."

"But you are going to London."

"I am going to London."

"As you will, Mary," Robert said, and I heard the hollow echo of Alex's words. It will be as you wish, Mary, he'd said so long ago. It will be as you wish if you go and get It, I told myself. I thanked him again and he nodded, moving toward the door. "I'll call my carriage," he said. "Come.".

I collected the boys while Robert waited, and then we followed him down the stairs, the boys and dogs making a terrible din behind us, William Wallace nearly knocking Robert over in his excitement. At the street Robert ushered us into the carriage and stood at the door. Robert the Bruce rose to nuzzle him, and Robert gave him an affectionate pat. His eyes met mine and I shrank from what I still saw in them. I extended my hand.

"Thank you, Robert," I said, "with all my heart, thank you, for your generosity and your kindness."

He took my hand in both of his. "You are welcome, Mary," he said, each word weighted, "you are welcome. With all my heart." We stared at each other for a moment, then he glanced behind him. "My men will take you to your ship." I thanked him again. He lowered his voice. "Mary, a long time ago I told you that if you ever needed me, I would be there. I have tried to be. But now I am considering my pledge fulfilled. I wish you well."

My eyes filled with tears and his expression softened as he saw them. I withdrew my hand. "Take care of yourself," I said.

Robert stepped back. "Godspeed, Mary," he said as the carriage lurched away. "Safe
journey."

The Mary Rose was docked and guarded by armed soldiers, but we were not prevented from approaching her. Matthew stood by himself on the wharf while the men of Kilgannon hung over the ship's rails above him. As the carriage drew to a halt and the boys burst out, followed by the dogs, a cheer rose from the clansmen. And when I emerged the roar that greeted me was overwhelming. I smiled up into their faces, surprised by their welcome, and saw Gilbey just above me, Thomas and Dougall at his side, and many others, including Calum MacGannon, the Mary Rose's captain. Thank God, I thought, Gilbey is safe. They are all safe. My vision blurred, but I smiled again and waved to them, calling my greetings while the soldiers watched us warily.

"Where is your father?" I asked Matthew. His expression was worried as he pointed to the small building on the dock.

"The English willna release the ship even with the lawyer."

"We'll see about that," I said and raised my chin.

It had been easier than I'd thought. I had walked into the building boldly and in my most imperious manner told the assembled men staring at me in astonishment that I was the Countess of Kilgannon come to claim my dowry. I said I wanted to go back to England and was claiming the Mary Rose as my personal property and had waved my receipts at them as though that would solve everything. The soldiers had scrambled to find me a chair while Angus crossed his arms over his chest and watched me from under bushy eyebrows, then introduced me to Kenneth Ogilvie, who I'd heard of for years, but never met. Alex's lawyer, a quiet man of medium height with sparse dark hair and startling blue eyes, had watched me with open amusement. When the English army officer argued that the ship belonged to Alex and had been forfeited, I waved his words away.

"Check with the shipwrights. My solicitor has already told you the same. She is my ship. It was my money that bought her, not my husband's, and it is my name that she carries. I am going on board now and then I am going home to England." I looked from the blazing face of the officer before me to his captain, who watched me cautiously. "Sir," I said to the captain, my voice full of the tears that were never far away, "I am an English citizen and the Mary Rose is my property, the only property I have left. I want to go home. Have I not suffered enough in
Scotland
?" Tears filled my eyes and spilled down my cheeks, but I ignored them as I continued. "The ship is mine, sir, and I want to go home." I wiped my cheek. I was not lying. I did want to go on board the Mary Rose and more than anything I wanted to go to England.

The captain's expression softened and he nodded slowly. "You may go aboard, madam, with your sons, but I'll have to have orders from the castle before I can release the ship."

"Thank you, sir. I will wait on board for your news."

The captain bowed. I turned from him and tried not to trip over the jumble of boys and dogs before me. I did not look back as I left the building, and when I came to the gangplank the soldiers there moved aside. I went on board

the Mary Rose, followed by the boys and Angus and Matthew and Kenneth Ogilvie, and was greeted with a roar of approval by the clansmen.

Angus was not so pleased. He shook his head and frowned. "Well, lass, ye got us on board, for whatever good it will do. What have ye accomplished? We'll all be prisoners here the now."

I met his gaze evenly. "What do you think I've been at Robert's? At least here, prisoners or not, we are all together and that's a far sight better than where I've been. And we're going to London." I ignored Angus's raised eyebrows and turned to greet the men.

My luggage was brought on board eventually, amidst much amusement at the number of pieces. I ignored all the jibes and
settled
us into the big cabin. And at last found a quiet moment. London
, I thought. We wi
ll
go to London, I knew that we were not yet free to go, but legally the ship was clearly mine and Kenneth had told me it was within my rights to demand return of my property I wanted more, though, and that could be difficult. I wanted all the Kilgannon men to be allowed to leave with me. Ogilvie warned me that here I was on shaky ground. These were the same men who had taken arms against England, and while they would not be imprisoned now, I could hardly expect beneficence from the English army while I was in their company

London, I thought again. There, at least, we would have allies. Or would we? What would our reception be? I'd not heard from Louisa or Will since I wrote that Alex had joined the rebellion. Would they welcome us or would I be an unwanted burden? Had I embarrassed them, or worse, made their political situation more difficult? Would they be aghast at Alex's joining the rebellion? Would they despise him now? No matter, I told myself. If my family could not, or would not, aid us, I would at least be near Alex, and if I had no allies but the boys and the MacGannons, I would be content. I opened another trunk and for the moment ignored what lay ahead.

Whether Mr. Ogilvie was successful or money had been exchanged I never discovered, but we were not challenged further. Nor, however, were we allowed to leave. The ships blocking our path were manned and the sailors on them firm in their orders. The mood on board was quiet, but I often heard smidgens of plots to free us, hastily interrupted as I appeared, and I knew it would not be long before the rebellious attitudes turned into action, if for no other reason than that we were almost out of food. And then Kenneth Ogilvie, who had been visiting daily, brought unwelcome news. Jamie Ramsay had been hanged after a
perfunctory
trial. The men muttered amongst themselves, any
pretence
at calm gone.

On the morning of our third day on board, Ian and Jamie burst into my cabin and, with excited grins, insisted that I go on deck. They grabbed my hands and I followed them, thinking that we must have received permission to leave. In the sunshine I blinked and let my eyes adjust. To my left a man in dark clothes moved quickly toward me and I turned to him, my hand at my throat.

"This is a fine welcome after we've combed all of
Scotland
for you, Mary! I expected a warmer welcome for the world's most wonderful brother!"

"Will!" I threw my arms around him with a sob. And eventually saw my uncles over his shoulder. "Randolph! And Uncle
Harry
!"

We settled into the cabin with tea and whisky, and Angus, Matthew, and I heard their story. My brother and uncles had indeed been all over
Scotland
looking for me. After the word of the rebellion reached London, they had been terribly worried about us. Both Louisa and Will had written, but of course I never received those letters. When Will and Randolph decided to go to Kilgannon themselves, no one would bring them by boat, and when the news of Sherrifmuir came they knew it was foolish to go overland. They got my letter telling them not to come for Christmas. And then silence. They wrote again and waited for news and when they heard that James Stewart had left
Scotland
and that many of the rebels had gone with him, they prayed that we had joined him.