The Willing (15 page)

Emily shot a scathing look at Rachel. I
wondered why.

“Oh, don’t worry,” Lenora said
soothingly, standing and passing us on her way to the kitchen. She
continued to talk as she took down plates. “No one had to tell me
you were pregnant. I just know these things. A mother’s instincts,
you know. Girls, do you want milk or blood with your
pie?”

“Blood, please,” Rachel and I answered
at the same time.

“Emily?” Lenora called. “Milk or
something else? I can make you a cup of tea if you’d
like.”

The Lycanti girl stared towards the
kitchen, flabbergasted. “Um, milk, I guess,” she answered quietly.
“Please.”

Lenora came back with a pie platter and
plates lined on one arm, and two glasses in each of her hands
filled with our choice of drinks, her balance a relic of decades of
waitressing. “Here, Rai,” she said. “Take these plates and the pie
while I put these down.”

Rachel did as instructed. I wanted to
laugh so badly the befuddled look on Emily’s face as the Mother of
the Children of Dacre served her pie, but I held it back. I didn’t
want to make Emily mad.

Getting settled again, Lenora watched
Emily closely as she ate. “You need to eat more, kid. You’re too
far along to be this skinny.”

I myself thought Emily looked pretty
healthy. She wasn’t a small girl with no meat on her bones and she
had a baby bump, but then again, I didn’t really know how pregnant
she was.

“I’m fine,” she said somewhat steadily.
“It’s been a hard pregnancy.”

“I know, child. I know. He’ll be here
soon, you know. It’s time you prepared. He’ll be strong. You won’t
want to be alone when it happens—or with Rachel or Shasta,” she
added. “They won’t be able to handle the blood. You need to be with
me. Remember: I’m the only one who knows what happens when a
Lycanthrope is born.”

Emily looked a little shaken by the
candid comment. “What happens?”

Lenora smiled softly. “Did you come
here to talk about birthing babies or about killing Lycanti?
Because one of them can’t wait and one of them can. And I’ll give
you a hint: that baby boy still has a way to go.”

Emily’s eyebrows lifted this time. “How
do you know it’s a boy?”

Lenora smiled insightfully. “Mama
Lenora knows. Mama Lenora always knows. And trust me, he will be as
beautiful as his mama is and twice as sweet.”

Rachel said with a laugh, “That’s good,
because she’s a real bitch.”

With a sharp intake of breath, I
glanced at Emily, ready to jump up and react if
necessary.

To my surprise, the Lycanti girl just
chuckled. Lenora did not look surprised at all, but I sure as heck
was.

“Don’t worry, sweetie, he won’t have
your temper…or his Aunt Rachel’s.” Rachel grinned. “He’ll actually
be the most like his father.”

Emily’s face fell.

“Only the good qualities, dear. Think
of what a strong leader the man is, how charismatic, how driven.
How strong and in control he is. You knew that the first time you
met him; it’s what called you to him.”

Emily reluctantly nodded. She still
looked worried, but not angry, which was a relief to me. “I just
want him to be happy. I don’t want him to be a
werewolf.”

Lenora’s eyes spoke of sympathy and
pain. “I understand. I wouldn’t have chosen this life for any of my
Children.”

All four of us shared a silent moment
of pain. Rachel finally spoke, as pragmatic as ever.

“But he has to become a Lycanthrope,
doesn’t he? I’m taking it that his dad is one of you?” she asked
Emily.

“Yes.”

“Then you don’t have a
choice.”

“There’s got to be some way,” Emily
said stubbornly. “I know there is. I refuse to believe that this is
the only way.”

Lenora’s bright green eyes were just as
luminescent as Emily’s, I noticed suddenly, a relic from her birth
as a Lycanthrope I was sure. They sparkled with energy even
now.

“The Lycathrope have found a way,” she
said cautiously. “But it is very dangerous, and the process can’t
be undone. They make their children wait until the Change is upon
them at the beginning of adolescence if the child is adamant about
remaining human, but I think the antidote can be given at any
time.”

“Then there’s a way?” Emily asked
desperately.

Rachel’s eyes lit up. “Lenora, why
haven’t you said something about this before?”

“It doesn’t work for those who have
been Changed,” she replied sadly. “Do you think I would live like
this if it did?”

Rachel sat in stony silence. “Then
there’s no hope for us. Ever.”

Tears came to my eyes. I guess I had
always known the truth. Rachel and I had talked about it sometimes,
being human again. This whole constantly starving thing sucked.
Being set apart from humanity sucked pretty hard, too. The only
people who could possibly understand and help us, the Lycanthrope
and Lycanti, hated us and treated us like a plague. I pushed my
glass of lukewarm blood around on the table, passing it from hand
to hand.

Emily put a protective hand on her baby
bump, then thoughtfully reached over and took Rachel’s hand which
was resting on the table. Rachel glared at her, but then her face
softened when she saw the tears in Emily’s eyes.

“I’m so sorry, Rachel.”

Emily squeezed her hand and then let it
go quickly, as if it had never happened. Rachel smiled. A real
smile between friends, not the patiently indulgent smiles that I
got. Rachel treated me like a child who needed to be taken care of,
but Emily she treated as a confidante. Jealousy surged up,
puke-green and intense. Now the tears in my eyes were from
frustration instead of loss. I sat there silently trying to ignore
my feelings.

Their little private moment over with,
Lenora felt the need to start the conversation again. “I can help
you, Emily, but not until after the baby is born, and not before
you learn some vital things about yourself. To save yourself and
your son, you will have to learn self-control. You need to be just
as powerful as the man you want revenge on, just as driven, just as
confident. If you’re not as strong as he is, you won’t be able to
do the things you need to do.

“I have a plan, but we’re going to have
to work on your attitude first. I hope you don’t have anything you
miss too much at Rachel’s place right now, because if you want to
do this, then you won’t leave this house for at least a year. We’re
going to get most of your anger under control. You wouldn’t want to
hurt your son, would you?”

Emily looked aghast the idea of this.
Psycho bitch. She’d probably kill that poor kid within a week of
his birth.

Lenora paused thoughtfully. “Think of
it as a boot camp for your soul, Emily. Are you in?”

Emily didn’t even pause when she
answered. I wanted to be happy for her, because I knew that now
she’d get revenge on Josh and his pack and we’d get to kill most of
the Lycanti and be full for the first time in years, but all I
could focus on was how worried Rachel looked about her.

For the rest of the night, I had to
endure conversation that switched back and forth between talk about
baby clothes and cribs, and the merciless plan Lenora had for the
Lycanti. Through it all, Rachel expressed her concern over Emily’s
well-being. By the time the sun was due to rise, for once I wanted
to kill something, and maybe not even drink its blood.

Emily

Only a day after the monthly Change,
and Luka showed up at my hotel door at midmorning. I had already
showered and put on a sundress, still driven by the manic energy
that accompanied the Change and lingered for days. I had planned to
walk the city and maybe take a bus over to the next city over just
to have something to do.

“Did you eat?” he asked as I opened the
door.

His question caught me off guard. I
spent a few seconds wondering if he was speaking about devouring
something juicy while Changed the night before, or if I had had
breakfast. I decided to go with the latter. The answer to same,
thankfully, was the same.

“No.”

After all, I’m no animal, regardless of
what the priest thought of me. I don’t eat human flesh—at least,
not anymore.

His whole attitude had changed to one
of indifference. After all, I hadn’t seen him in almost three
weeks. “Let’s grab breakfast then.”

“OK,” I answered simply. I wasn’t sure
how to react to his new sense of calm, especially after feeling the
sexual energy that still danced between us.

We had breakfast in a small café,
eating eggs on cheap plastic plates and swilling black coffee from
little paper cups. It was insanely sweet, but I had gotten used to
it after some time in Brazil. The locals drink it all day. It’s
pretty good, and I knew I would miss it when I returned home. I
figured I could learn to brew it and sweeten it correctly with some
experimentation.

The breakfast basically
took place in silence. Luka would look at me, start to say
something, then reconsider, shake his head, and take another bite
or sip of something. I tried to remain composed, breathing deep and
recalling everything Lenora taught me about achieving balance. It’s
like I could hear her mellifluous voice in my head:
You can’t achieve your goals if you’re angry all
the time. Breathe. Losing control means that someone else will have
control over you.

Finally, Luka made some mundane comment
about the weather, and my patience snapped.

“What, exactly, do you want?” I
demanded. “You were here bright and early to collect me. You must
have something in mind.”

He was unfazed by my intensity, even
though the other patrons were quite interested in my outburst. In
Brazil, even if they can’t understand you, they will try like hell
to understand you just so they can get in your business. Luka kept
his words deliberately vague. “It is time for you to go
home.”

His words confused me. “I’m supposed to
get Micah. Ranier promised.”

Luka’s voice had a warning edge to it.
“You have played enough games here, Emily. Do not pull my House
into this game. You will not like the result.”

Anxiety rose in me, and I quelled it.
“Ranier promised,” I repeated. “He promised men from his house,
your house, to help me get Micah back. Don’t you want your own son
to be safe?”

“Oh, so now he is my son?” Luka asked
sarcastically, his voice now louder. “Less than a month ago he was
Will’s son. Whose son is he to be next month? My father’s? For that
would most assuredly be just as believable as the rest of the lies
you have thrown out thus far.”

I bit back a thousand tart replies
about my virtue. After all, I had just tried to seduce a priest the
night before and killed him because he refused to fuck me. I felt
disgust and guilt, but the Change overwhelms me. The Lycanti in me
overcomes all reason. I swallowed my anger as best as I could.
Instead of arguing, I said simply, “Your father will not go back on
his word.”

“No, he will not, even though I have
told him how foolish this whole venture is. I have a son. Alexander
is to be heir to my father’s fortune and the Lycanthrope legacy
after me. I will not have his future corrupted by a child who may
or may not be mine.”

“Luka, I have told you— ”

His fist hit the table in
frustration. People were openly starting at us now, and a blush
stole into my cheeks. “You have told me nothing. You have evaded
every question I have asked with what you claim is ignorance, but I
can see it in your eyes. There is some dark purpose that you have
here. I cannot even begin to guess what it is, but I know that all
of this is not just to get Micah back. I knew that when I saw you
react to Josh in the north. He is the father of this child, and you
hate him for it. You knew very well what you were doing when you
took him to Maria. You knew she would keep him and claim him as her
own. You knew she would not give him up. You knew that by telling
my father that he is of our house, Ranier would retrieve him for
you, even if it meant blood between the clans.
Dizer a verdade
! Tell me the
truth.”

I stared hard at him for a minute,
watching his chest rise and fall, wishing suddenly that he was
Lycanti instead of Lycanthrope. If so, the emotion in his outburst
would have made him Change, causing a commotion so large that I
could run away from him and from his accusations. Only the truth
would suffice now.

“I knew,” I admitted. I added, “All
those things.”

It calmed him as I knew it would. He
had never hated the idea that Micah was not his child. He had only
hated being lied to by someone he had vowed to protect, someone who
had broken his trust once before and asked for it again.
Soft-hearted by strong-willed Luka, who let me back into his life
after I killed his best friend with my Lycanti lust for blood, who
has barely spoken one truthful word to him since I found him again
in that bar and let him meet Micah that night, extracting from him
a promise to protect me.