Things I Can't Forget (12 page)

“Kate?” Matt calls.

“Trust me,” Brad says, sliding his hands into the pockets of his khaki shorts. His eyes are begging me.

“I won’t tell,” I say. “But be more careful with your car. Park it in a different spot or something.”

“Thanks,” he says quietly.

“I’m worried.”

“Don’t,” he says, smiling meekly, and turns toward Treeland.

I head over to Matt. He wraps an arm around me and whispers in my ear. “You okay?”

“Fine,” I lie.

“I don’t buy that,” he replies, leaning his forehead against mine. “What were you talking to Brad about?”

“Just making sure he’s okay. He seemed upset tonight.”

“Oh. I didn’t notice ’cause I was too busy thinking about last night.”

I smile, stretching my arms around his waist.

He says, “Want to roast some marshmallows? I’ll nick a bag from the cafeteria.”

I glance up to find Parker and Will grinning at us while the rest of the counselors are staring. In disbelief? Does wrapping his arm around me in front of people mean we’re official?

“I can’t believe this,” Andrea mutters, loud enough for everybody to hear.

Ian gives her a nasty look before shooting me a look of sympathy. Then mischief breaks out on his face. “Let’s hear it for Matt and Kate! Woooo!”

“Oh my Lord,” Matt says, shaking his head at Ian, who starts dancing a very inappropriate dance, grinding his hips in our direction.

“Gross,” Carlie says, sticking out her tongue. “I’ve told you so many times that guys should never, ever grind.”

“I totally agree,” Parker says, disgusted. “Guys’ bodies are just not meant to work that way.” Will starts moving his hips, which earns him a prompt slap on the chest from Parker.

Matt is cracking up, as Ian keeps right on doing strange things with his pelvis.

“Ugh,” Andrea says.

“Ugh, indeed,” Brad replies, making Andrea snort with laughter.

“How about we get those marshmallows now?” I say to Matt.

“Please!” He takes my hand, leading me away from the group. I go quiet for a bit because I can’t believe how rude Andrea acts sometimes.

“Are you okay?” he asks when we’re out of earshot. He rubs his thumb along the back of my hand.

I hold my chin up. “Um, are you friends with Andrea? Or just acquaintances, or what?”

“Friends, I guess.” He drags a hand through his messy blond hair. “Why?”

“She’s not nice to me, really.”

“What did she do?” he mumbles.

I don’t want to bring up how she said he’d never get over her. Her meaning Sarah, I guess. It would be terrible dating a guy who doesn’t completely want me. Wait. He hasn’t even asked me out officially.

“It’s fine,” I say. “Forget it.”

The sun is setting into a gorgeous pink puddle in the sky, as Matt takes me by the shoulders and turns me to face him, his warm breath breezing across my face. He lightly touches my cheek. I get up on tiptoes and wrap my arms around his neck.

“I don’t want to forget about it,” Matt says. “Did Andrea hurt you?”

“She’s mad I went to Chili’s with you. She must really be into ranch dressing,” I say with a nervous laugh.

“Ranch is serious business.”

I play with the hair at the nape of his neck.

“I’ll talk to her, okay?” He hesitates before leaning in to kiss my forehead. “It’s nothing to do with you. It’s between me and Andrea.”

I don’t like the idea of anything being between him and Andrea. Not even friendship. “Have you, um, ever been with her?”

He shuts his eyes. “She’s tried to make out with me before, yeah, but it was nothing.” He gently moves fingers up and down my arm. “She was a good friend after Sarah dumped me…I really needed someone to talk to, and she made me laugh and kept me company. We played a lot of Scrabble and did crossword puzzles together…And even though she didn’t mean to start feeling this way, she ended up wanting a lot more from me. But I’ve never felt anything special with her.”

I nod, stepping closer, wrapping his T-shirt in my fist. No wonder she was crying. Something inside me breaks a little for her.

“You know what I think?” he whispers in my ear.

“What?”

“It’s marshmallow time.”

Matt snags marshmallows and Crisco from the cafeteria and gets a fire blazing up at Redwood, the cabin out in the middle of nowhere. Flames burst into the air when he throws a glob of Crisco onto the wood. We jump back, laughing.

It’s a gazillion degrees outside but we cuddle together next to the fire, spearing marshmallow after marshmallow with our skewers. He feeds me one and I feed him one, and we both gag. Turns out he likes his golden brown and raw on the inside, while I like mine gooey and burnt to bits.

“I really like you,” he whispers, bumping his knee against mine, staring at me. He leans over and gently kisses my lips.

“I like you too.”

“You’re funny and you can paint a mean watercolor painting of apples in a barrel and you’ve got a great body.”

I accidentally snort and blush, and when I peek over at him, I begin to understand that he probably won’t forget me, that he thinks there’s something inside me worth knowing.

“You’ve been looking in my art closet, eh?” I ask, thinking of my apples in a barrel painting.

“It’s like a little art gallery in there.”

He picks a piece of gummy marshmallow off my lower lip, and my stomach flips.

A few minutes later, I yawn. He extinguishes the fire, and we go get our bags from our cars. I’m staying in Pinecone cabin this week, in Treeland, so I say good night and start to head that way.

He takes my hand, looking around. “Why don’t you come sleep in Dogwood with all of us tonight?”

I shake my head.

“Is it Andrea? Don’t worry about her. She’ll get over it. Maybe Bumblebee Brad will strike her fancy.”

I giggle nervously. “It’s not Andrea…”

“Then what is it?” He kisses my knuckles.

“It’s not right for guys and girls to share a bed before marriage,” I mumble.

Will and Parker walk past, carrying their sleeping bags. Will is moving his hips like Ian did earlier and she is laughing hysterically, trying to sidestep her boyfriend and his grinding.

“They shared a bed last week,” Matt says.

“So? We’ve been on one date.”

“A great date.” He grins down at me and wraps his arms around my waist. “The best date ever.”

“You’re just saying that because you beat me at Skee-Ball.”

“And basketball.”

“You have to rub it in, eh?” I say with a grin.

“It’s fine,” Matt says, pressing his forehead to mine. “You don’t have to sleep in Dogwood.”

“Thank you,” I reply, sighing a little. But what if he goes to sleep in Dogwood with everybody else? Andrea’s in there…

“Want to go running in the morning?”

I nod, even though my knee is sore. Matt grabs my bedding and suitcase and leads me to Pinecone, where we share a long, passionate kiss good night on the porch. I make my bed and unpack my clothes. I read from the Bible and pray for Brad and his father and whatever’s going on there, then spend some time sketching and studying my work.

Fifteen minutes later, a knock sounds on the door and I shove my sketchbook under my covers. I look up to see Matt standing outside.

“Can I come in?” he asks.

My heart goes wild. Does he want to make out or something? If I let that start, will he want to spend the night? Will he want to sleep in my bed like Will sleeps in Parker’s?

“It’ll just take a second,” he says, grinning.

“Okay.”

Matt walks in, and like last Sunday night, he drags a bed from inside onto the porch. I watch through the screen as he unrolls his sleeping bag and crawls inside.

“Good night, King Crab Kate,” he says softly.

“Good night,” I say, laughing. I turn out the light and lie down. I focus on the gap between us, wanting to fill the space between. I can’t help it.

“Sweet dreams,” I say, and face the opposite wall so I won’t give in and invite him inside.

I flip my pillow over to the cool side.

•••

Monday morning, after a run with Matt and after my new group of campers have arrived, I spend my break praying in the Woodsong Chapel. I kneel down in front of a splintered log serving as an altar and bow my head, trying to forget about what happened yesterday with Emily, but it recycles over and over in my mind. Minutes later I hear pine needles and sticks crunching beneath feet. I glance up to find Brad making his way down the path.

“Hey,” I say.

He nods back at me and kneels a few feet away. What’s he praying for? I say a prayer for him, and then go back to thanking God for my date with Matt and asking God for forgiveness for helping Emily. When I’m finished, I stand carefully, so I don’t mangle my knee. Brad stands too and gives me a smile.

“Where you off to?” he asks.

“Art pavilion. I’ve got a group coming in a few minutes.” We hike up the trail together and I reach out to drag my fingers across pine needles dripping from trees.

“So you and Matt, huh?” He grins, slipping his hands in his pockets.

My face blushes and I grin back at him, not saying a word.

“I so called it.”

“Are you seeing anyone?” I ask.

He digs his hands further down into his pockets. “Nah…”

I furrow my eyebrows. Brad is cute, sweet, and nice. Granted, I don’t feel a strong pull to him like I do with Matt, but I am sure plenty of girls could feel like that toward him.

“I want to get out of here after this summer,” he says quietly. “That’d be hard if I had someone.”

“What are you trying to get away from? Why did you mention your dad yesterday?”

He runs a hand over his head and focuses on his feet. “It’s just me and him. He drinks…he’s gotten worse ever since Mom left.”

“Your mom left?” I exclaim. “Why?”

“’Cause Dad is a nasty drunk, that’s why.” His eyes shift to his upper arm, where I saw the bruises last week.

“Where did she go?”

“Not sure, don’t care,” Brad says quietly. “She left before Christmas. She missed my graduation.” His voice is soft.

I can’t imagine my parents missing my graduation. They’d buy a bong before that would happen.

“That’s why you stayed here last weekend?” I ask.

He shrugs. “I can’t afford to live anywhere else but at camp this summer. I need to save my money so I can leave…I want to take my road trip and get a job at a park.”

“Does your dad hurt you?”

He touches his bruised bicep. “That’s not what scares me,” he whispers, staring off into the trees. A bird chirps above us. “I’m scared that”—he pauses to take a breath—“If I stay, I’ll end up like him. And my grandfather.”

He looks over at me, his eyes begging me not to tell.

“Have you talked to Megan? She got you this job, right? She might understand—”

He quickly shakes his head. “You know how strict she is. And I don’t want my church involved. It’ll just piss Dad off more.”

If I keep this a secret and Megan finds out, Brad would get fired. If she finds out I knew, I’d get fired too, and my church and parents would be disappointed in me for lying. Can something like this stay a secret for five weeks?

I’m tempted to invite him to live with us, but Mom and Daddy would get all nosy and try to fix the situation between Brad and his dad, and it seems like Brad wants to leave.

“Can you do a better job of hiding your car?” I tell Brad.

“I will.” He squeezes my shoulder. “Hey, I’m glad about you and Matt. You deserve it. You’re a good person.”

A good person.

I shut my eyes, smiling a sad smile. Should a good person lie?

I trudge over to the art pavilion and start pulling out paint brushes and paper for my lesson, but I can’t stop thinking of Brad and how’s he’s a good Christian, but he’s willing to break a big rule like this. It’s a good rule. If Brad got hurt bad on a weekend, nobody would discover him until Sunday night.

I’ve always heard that saying, “Some rules are meant to be broken,” but no one ever says that even if the rule is meant to be broken, usually something bad happens when you break it.

Brad needs more help than just me covering for him.

He needs a real family and friends and love.

But I guess not all of us get that.

Sometimes we get a mess. Like Emily did. And then you have to work past that or drown where you stand.

•••

Before Tuesday Talent Night, Matt takes my elbow and pulls me behind Great Oak. I tiptoe around the bushes, in case of poison ivy.

“What?” I whisper. “It’s almost time to start the show.”

“I can’t wait.”

“Wait for what?”

Sticks snap under my feet as he shoves me up against the wooden wall and presses his mouth to mine. Kissing me hard and fast. My skin prickles. I’m panting. He pulls my hips against his.

“What if Megan hears us?” I ask. Her office is on the other side of this wall.

“Sometimes you just can’t wait,” he says between kisses. “Like at Just Tacos.”

“I’m not a taco,” I reply, playfully pushing him.

“Yummy,” he says against my lips. I run my fingers underneath the hemp necklace I made for him, caressing his collarbone.

I can hear Ian and two campers practicing Madonna’s “Material Girl” for tonight. And apparently he enlisted Will for some additional harmonies.

I gently nudge Matt away. “To be continued?” I whisper.

“Can’t wait.” He grins and sneaks another kiss. “By the way, will you be my date to the dance on Thursday?”

“Sure,” I say with a smile, and kiss him again.

After the girls are in bed that night, I climb the hill to the cafeteria. It’s the only place besides Megan’s office with a phone. And it’s a pay phone, at that. I drop two quarters into it and dial Emily’s cell number.

She picks up on the second ring. “Hello?” She sounds confused. Probably has no idea whose this number is.

“Hi. It’s me, Kate.”

I hear a click. And then a dial tone fills my ear. And then a voice comes on, saying that if I’d like to make another call, I have to deposit more change.

That’s when I hear the noises. I hang up the phone and sneak around the side of the building. So Matt was right about Ian and Carlie doing it behind the cafeteria. Ew. I hustle away, cringing.