Three Nights before Christmas (14 page)

“Right.”

“And he hasn’t noticed me dropping you off yet, so you’re worried tonight will be the night and he’ll give you shit for sleeping with me.”

“Fucking,” she said. “Not sleeping.”

“Right. Got it.” His hands cupped her face. He hadn’t put on gloves for the walk, so his skin cooled her blushing cheeks. Leaning down, he kissed her, a different kiss than all the ones before. Slow and sweet, tasting and testing. His thumbs found the hollows beneath her ears and brushed tiny circles over them, making her moan against his lips. He took his time, as if he were confident there’d be many more kisses in the future and he wanted to savor each one.

This was not a
fucking
kiss. This was a kiss that demanded more.

She pulled away.

“Wow. That’s…wow.” She felt softer than she ever had before.

He rubbed his nose against hers before pressing one last kiss to the tip of it. “I’ll watch you walk into the house.”

“I’ll put some extra sway in my hips for you.”

He chuckled, his rough fingertips brushing her cheeks as he dropped his hands. “I’ll watch even closer then.”

She turned to walk away but looked back before she got to the edge of the trees. “Out of curiosity, what’s your head telling you now?”

One corner of his lips kicked up. “That I’d better buy more condoms before tomorrow afternoon.”

Her smile split wide open. “I guess listening to your head sometimes isn’t so bad.”

She felt his gaze warming her as she walked to the house. When she wriggled her butt on the stairs, his soft chuckle followed her, making her smile as she hung up her winter gear and got rid of her boots in the mudroom. Sawyer happened to be heading down the hall when she walked in the door, but he barely spared her a glance. “Decided you like your haircut after all?”

She followed him into the living room. “What are you talking about?”

He collapsed onto the couch and picked up a remote. “You got a haircut, came home pissed off. Now you’re happy.”

“You must think women are such simple creatures.”

He grunted and flipped on the TV. She settled next to him, pulling her feet up and shifting to burrow deeper into the old, broken-in cushions.

He glanced at her clothes. “Dinner’s in the kitchen, if you want it. Chili.”

“In a minute. I want to talk to you first.”

His body tensed, as if he were bracing himself. He didn’t face her, but at least he put the TV on mute.

“I was a witch earlier and I’m sorry.”

His eyes flickered, but she couldn’t tell what he was thinking. Wouldn’t even want to guess. His mind wasn’t exactly a place she wanted to delve into.

“It has nothing to do with my hair.”

“I know.”

“You do?” Oh, crap. If he knew about Austin… or the letter from Dave…

“Yeah. I don’t
really
think women are simple. I know enough of you people to realize how complex you are. The hair thing was a joke.”

“Oh. Okay. Good.” So he didn’t know?

He sighed and dropped his head back against the pillows as he stared up at the ceiling. “None of this is easy, is it?”

“No,” she whispered. “And I’m sorry for making your life more difficult.”

“Stop. Just stop,” he demanded in a weary voice. “You’re my sister, and I don’t know if you’ve looked around lately, but you’re the only day-to-day family I have. I’d do everything… if you’d just let me.”

“I know.” She rubbed at a grease stain on her jeans. “But I have pride, too, Sawyer. And it’s been dented enough. There are some things I have to handle on my own. As broad as your shoulders are, big brother, they couldn’t carry all my problems—and they shouldn’t. I built a life for myself once, and I’ll do it again. The first time, I did it on my own, but it’s tougher now and I need your help with some things—but not everything.”

He stared at the flickering TV, seeming to absorb that.

“Anyway, I’m sorry for taking it out on you earlier. Readjusting is a little more challenging than I expected, and you happened to be there when I exploded. I shouldn’t have done that, and I’m sorry.” Pushing herself off the sofa, she stood. “I’m going to wash these clothes. Got any laundry?”

“Basket in my room.”

“Okay.”

She was nearly out of the room when he called out, “Gonna tell me why you were smiling?”

“If I did, you’d end up wearing the blender out.”

He cursed and turned the TV’s sound back on… as loud as it would go.

*

The number of
trees ready to be cut was dwindling rapidly. Lacey and the guys had been cutting them to meet customer demand, but soon they would run out of stock, leaving the trees that wouldn’t be ready till next year or beyond. Lacey was amazed. She’d never seen the farm so busy, certainly not when their parents had run it. Sawyer had been doing things right, and if he kept it up they would have to close up the shop before Christmas. Hopefully that would give them both some breathing room so they weren’t grumpy on Christmas day.

But there was still probably a week’s worth of trees ready to go, so Lacey yanked the chainsaw on and got to work. She cut, carried, and baled about a dozen trees before checking her phone. She’d only received Dave’s letter yesterday, but Jenna had asked her to mail it to her, unopened so no one would think Lacey had been a willing party to the contact. So before going to the annex yesterday, Lacey had asked a customer to drop her off in town and gone to the post office. She was desperate to know what the letter said—and equally desperate not to know. But curiosity had triumphed over fear, so she’d shelled out some of her hard-earned wages and had the letter overnighted to Billings.

Now she was checking her phone like a lovesick teen. She stacked the trees in the truck and collapsed into a chair in the break area she and the guys set up every morning. When she’d convinced herself she’d sat long enough that she didn’t feel pathetic, she pulled her phone out.

One new text.

Rigid with anticipation, she tapped the phone harder than necessary. Her heart picked up speed, but the text wasn’t from Jenna. It was from Austin, and he’d sent it about twenty minutes earlier.

Working in your neck of the woods. Okay if I stop by?

She let out a breath and wrote back.
Sure
.

That one word seemed like a mirror, reflecting her changes. Last week—hell, even yesterday—she would’ve written something sarcastic and biting, something to protect herself.

Funny how three screaming orgasms could change so much.

Austin wrote back quickly.
Warning: I’m in uniform.

She smiled.
Warning: I figured that.

Then she slid the phone into her pocket and poured some hot apple cider from her Thermos into a mug. He arrived quickly, his SUV pulling into the lot and parking next to the farm’s truck. When he got out, he immediately took his dark sunglasses off and stashed them in his chest pocket, as if he knew how disconcerting it was not to be able to see his eyes.

What was she talking about? Of course he knew. He’d probably been trained to keep them on.

He sauntered over to her, and she gestured to the empty chair next to her. “Got time to sit for a while?”

“A bit.” He sat next to her and eyed her steaming drink. “Cider?”

“Virgin.”

“None of my business if it isn’t.”

It was, actually. He could have her hauled off on a parole violation if she were drinking alcohol. But she appreciated the effort he was clearly making to separate their past from their present.

She held up an empty cup. “Want some?”

“Please.”

She poured it for him and settled back in her chair, stretching her legs out and crossing them at the ankles. They chatted about Lucinda and the parts that were coming back from the mechanics. They watched the forest’s trees do nothing but stand rooted to the ground and sway a little. When curiosity got the better of her, she finally allowed herself to ask, “So what did you want to see me about?”

He looked surprised. “Nothing in particular.”

And that shocked the hell out of her. “Really?”

“Really.”

Eyes narrowing, she tried to ferret out the truth. “You didn’t drop by for sex?”

His cheeks flushed adorably as his gaze dropped to her mouth and heated up. “Nope.”

“Yeah, right.”

“Seriously. Not while I’m on duty.”

“Huh.” That completely threw her. “What if I tried to seduce you?”

He grinned. “I’d enjoy that, but I’d still have to say no.”

“Oh.” He was serious. He didn’t have an ulterior motive for seeking her out. “You really just wanted to see me?”

Seeming exasperated with her disbelief, he turned his chair to face hers and leaned forward. “I wanted to see you. I was in the area. It seemed like a good thing.”

“It is a good thing. It’s just…an unusual thing.”

Taking a sip of apple cider, he watched her with uncomfortably keen eyes. “You know, you can be fun to spend time around.”

“I know I can. I just didn’t realize other people knew it.”

“Oh, you’re a massive pain in the ass, that’s for sure. But you’re…” He trailed off, leaving her guessing.

“I’m what?”

He seemed to search for the right word, so she helped him out.

“The most beautiful woman ever?”

Bless him, he didn’t laugh, though his eyes did twinkle. “Definitely beautiful.”

She snorted. “That’s the blow job talking.”

“Pretty sure there was no talking involved in the blow job.”

“None for me, anyway.”

Now he laughed. “See? This is what I mean. You’re funny. And…”

“Horny.”

That didn’t get the response she’d expected. His brows lowered and formed a straight line. “Why do you keep bringing it back to sex?”

“Have you ever gone three years without? I guarantee you’d have sex on the brain, too.”

“Hmm.” He took another sip of cider. “Probably.”

And the thought of him having sex on the brain brought sex back to hers. She let herself look at him, sprawled out in a chair, all lanky muscles and wind-tousled brown hair. He was in uniform, but the way he looked at her cut through any anxiety she felt. He never stopped watching her as he sipped his hot apple cider. It would flavor his lips with sweetness.

She glanced around for the guys she was working with. Nowhere to be seen. Breaching the distance between them, she stroked the pad of her thumb over his lower lip. “Do you have anything against kissing while you’re on duty?”

In response, he captured her hand and tugged her out of her chair and onto his lap. She let out a puff of laughter, frosting the air. “I’ll take that as a no.”

“Definite no,” he murmured against her lips. His cold fingers slipped under her hat, tugging gently through the hair at her temples as he tilted her head and kissed her. She squirmed to get closer, making him groan and wrap an arm around her waist to still her. “You’re torturing me.”

“You’re the one making this hard with your no-sex rule.”

“Hate to argue, but you’re definitely the one making it hard.”

She grinned and kissed him, a first for her. Who knew it was even possible to smile and kiss? To want to get closer to someone she’d spent so long hating. No, not hating exactly. But he’d wounded her for sure.

Funny thing was, now he was helping her heal.

The thoughts took her places she didn’t want to go. She leaned her forehead against his, trying to regain control of her panting breath and runaway heart. “You…you were trying to find words to express how amazing I am. I shouldn’t have interrupted. Go ahead.”

Anything he might’ve said was cut short by the ring of her phone. She held up a finger. “Hold that thought.”

When she saw Jenna’s name on the screen, she scrambled out of his lap and walked several steps away for privacy. “Jenna. You got it?”

“A couple of hours ago. Is this a good time to talk?”

She glanced at Austin, who was clearly doing a cop thing of paying attention to her every movement without looking like he was. Knowing she looked suspicious but hoping he wouldn’t dig too hard, she said, “Sure. I was just taking care of some wood…
woods
. Trees, I mean. Sorry.”

“I have some good news.”

Despite the words, tension ramped up inside Lacey, winding her tighter than a steel drum. Good news didn’t come often, and it never came alone. “Give me the bad news first.”

“What?”

“When there’s good news, there’s always bad news. I want the bad stuff first. It’ll make the good news less frightening.”

Jenna’s voice softened. “Honey, there is no bad news here. Your ex found religion, and he’s recanted his testimony at your trial. He’s made a new sworn statement that you had no idea that you were transporting drugs for him, and he’s gotten three other gang members to verify his new testimony. All of this is now in the D.A.’s hands.”

The phone plummeted from her numb fingers into the snow. She dropped to her knees to pick it up, but Austin was already kneeling next to her, his hand strong and reassuring on her lower back as she lifted the phone to her ear with shaky hands.

“Lacey. Are you still there?”

“What does this mean?” Lacey asked, doing everything in her power to restrain her agonizing hope.