Authors: Barbara Erskine
Tags: #Body, #Mysticism, #General, #Visions, #Historical, #Mind & Spirit, #Fiction, #Religion, #Women Priests
Flavius gave a cynical smile. ‘Perhaps they haven’t told you, boy.’ He nudged his horse into a canter and Romanus had no more breath for talking. When they next slowed down, the trees had thinned. Around them lofty green pines clung to rocky outcrops and here and there bushes of gorse were still alight with golden flowers. Romanus caught up and looked up at his uncle eagerly. ‘Do you really work for the Emperor?’
Flavius leaned forward and slapped his horse’s neck. ‘I do. Why, has my brother said otherwise?’
Romanus shook his head. ‘No, no. He has said nothing. I just wondered. It sounds so exciting to travel the world on secret missions.’
Flavius nodded. ‘I suppose it is.’
Romanus looked round. He hadn’t noticed that the autumnal sun had disappeared and the creeping tendrils of mist were winding through the trees around them.
Flavius reined in his horse. ‘Is it much further?’ His voice was tense.
Romanus shook his head. ‘We are nearly there. We cross the heath here, and then we follow a track down towards the gorge.’ Where only moments before they had been making their way across the rock-strewn hillside, now they were surrounded by a wall of white. The boy shivered. He turned round, staring over his shoulder.
‘You aren’t lost?’ Flavius’s voice sharpened.
‘No, of course not.’ Romanus glanced up at his uncle. ‘You won’t hurt Mora, will you?’
Flavius held his gaze coldly. ‘There must be no witnesses to what I do here.’
‘But –’
‘No, Romanus.’ Flavius interrupted him. ‘I will not hurt Mora if you help me. When we get there you must see to it that they are separated. If you and Mora leave us alone, then neither of you will be witness to what happens and you will be safe. This is up to you, boy. Her life is in your hands. You will tell no-one of this conversation, do you understand? No-one. Not your sister, not your mother. Certainly not your father. If you do, I shall know and Mora will pay the price.’ He fixed Romanus’s face with a frightening stare. ‘You have it in you, boy, to be a servant of the Emperor. If you do this well, maybe I can get a position for you when you are a little older. It is up to you. Show me what you can do.’
‘He doesn’t kill him. I know he doesn’t kill him!’ Abi found she was clenching her fists, her knuckles white. She looked round. It had grown dark, the last light in the western sky a pale salmon behind the black silhouette of the Tor.
‘Who doesn’t kill who?’ Athena’s voice was almost a whisper. Abi swung round. The other woman had retreated to the bench and was sitting watching her, her hands wedged into the pockets of her jacket. Somewhere nearby an owl hooted.
Abi shook her head. She couldn’t, shouldn’t talk about this. At least, not the Jesus part. She managed a smile, walking over to Athena and sitting down next to her. ‘My Roman family is riven with hatred and jealousy. Two brothers who seem to hate each other.’
‘Common enough, alas,’ Athena said wryly. ‘Especially here. Mat and Justin.’
‘But they wouldn’t kill each other?’ Abi was shocked.
‘No, I don’t think it’s that bad.’
‘My Roman brothers seem to have fallen out over a woman.’
‘How corny!’ Athena gave a deep throaty laugh. ‘Not so, Mat and Just. I don’t know why they fell out, but it certainly wasn’t over dear old Cal.’ She stood up with a shiver. ‘At least I don’t think so.’ She paused thoughtfully, then she made a move towards the path. ‘Come on, it’s getting cold. Have you done enough eavesdropping for the night?’
Abi nodded. ‘You’re right. That’s what it is. Eavesdropping.’ She paused for a moment as they turned towards the house. ‘What did I do while that was going on? Did I say anything?’
Athena shook her head. ‘The only thing you said was, “I know he doesn’t kill him” or something like that when you came to. You were talking to yourself. Before that, all was silence. You seemed lost in thought. You just stood there, staring out across the garden.’
‘For how long?’
‘I don’t know. Long enough for me to get damn cold. Twenty minutes? Half an hour perhaps?’
‘It’s weird. I saw Mora this time, but she didn’t see me. She was across there, on the Isle of –’ She hesitated. ‘I was going to say, Avalon.’
‘Why didn’t you?’
‘Because it wasn’t. Not then, was it? That’s Arthurian. What I am seeing is way before Arthur. But they seem to call it that. Ynys yr Afalon.’
‘The Isle of Apples. It has had so many names. Glaston, from the Welsh word Glas, which was the colour of the waters of the lake. Thence the Isle of Glass, Ynys Witrin.’ Athena moved on across the grass. ‘That was in Anglo-Saxon times I think. Most people go for Avalloch, but whether that was to do with apples too, or named after some ancient chieftain, who knows. I like Afalon. The hard f in Welsh sounds like a v. That would make sense. Next time you see your Mora to talk to, ask her. It would solve a lot of puzzles over which historians and myth-makers argue for hours!’ Athena was heading back towards the house. Abruptly she stopped and turned to face Abi again. ‘How long were you a vicar?’
Abi grimaced uncomfortably. ‘A couple of years. I’m still a curate technically. I’ve never had my own parish.’
‘But you can do all the priest stuff, right? Communion? Bury people?’
‘Yes.’ Abi looked at her uncomfortably. ‘I became a proper priest after my first year as a curate.’
‘Then you resigned.’
Abi nodded. ‘But I’m still a priest.’ She found she was whispering. ‘It’s not something you can just undo.’
‘Blimey!’ Athena grinned. ‘Who’d have thought it. Me being friends with a lady vicar.’ She reached out and squeezed Abi’s hand. ‘Don’t look so forlorn. I expect you’re still human deep down.’ She gave a teasing smile.
Opening the kitchen door they went inside to find Cal and Mat laying the table. ‘Supper in twenty minutes,’ Cal said sternly. ‘And Ben wants you to ring him at once, Abi.’
She put the call through in the study, standing at the window staring out at the darkness while Athena, having accepted Cal’s invitation to stay for supper joined her and Mat in a glass of wine.
‘What did Kier say?’ Ben sounded agitated.
‘Quite a lot, but he went when asked.’
‘Was it very unpleasant?’
Abi hesitated. ‘Not as bad as I had feared, to be honest, but there were other people here. It might not have been so good if I had been on my own.’
‘David is going to contact him and call him back to Cambridge.’
‘You’ve spoken to David?’
‘Yes, of course. This can’t be allowed to go on. The man is obsessed. You have to be protected from his bullying.’
Abi grimaced at the darkened window. ‘Thank you, Ben.’
‘You are happy staying there? I don’t want you to feel that you are vulnerable now he knows where you are.’
‘I’m OK, Ben. Really. I feel completely safe here, thanks to your brother and Cal. They are fantastic. And Athena.’ She grinned as she thought of Kier’s reaction to meeting her.
‘Good. Well, you know where I am if you need me. Call any time. I mean that, Abi. Even in the middle of the night. And in a day or two we’ll fix up another meeting, OK?’
She stood staring out into the darkness after he had hung up, feeling the silence of the night beyond the glass. It was several minutes before she reached up and slowly drew the curtains.
Outside, Kier gave a final distasteful look at the dented blue car which was parked outside the front door. It had been easy to see that it belonged to the large, silver-haired woman who had been sitting by the fire in the kitchen. A worshipper of the goddess. In the back window was a small poster for an exhibition of sculpture in the town. It depicted a pottery figure of one of those hugely obscene naked females which these women seemed to find so necessary to their so-called worship. He shuddered. That the woman should be sitting there in the same room as Abi was grotesque. It was a disaster. It reinforced everything that he had most feared about the route Abi was taking out of the church. Didn’t she realise that she was still a priest? Once a priest always a priest. She could resign from her curacy, from a parish, but she could never resign from her priesthood. Facing the car he made the sign of the cross, then he turned and walked slowly down the drive towards the road.
Abi woke suddenly, every sense alert. She could hear footsteps downstairs in the room immediately below her bedroom. It was still dark outside. She groped for her bedside clock and stared at it. Three a.m. Sitting up, she slid her legs over the side of the bed and groped for her slippers. It was probably Cal or Mat. It had to be, otherwise the dogs would have barked but there was no harm in checking. Her heart was, she realised, thudding unevenly in her chest as she slipped on her dressing gown and quietly opened her bedroom door. Halfway down the stairs she stopped, listening. There was no sound now. And no light on anywhere that she could see. She crept down a few more steps. Surely if someone had come downstairs they would have switched on the lights? She paused in the hall. The sounds had been coming from the library. The door was closed. There was no sign of any light under the door. She crept closer, listening. Yes, there it was again, the quiet pad of footsteps, the sound of a chair or something, being moved. She put her hand on the door handle and turned it softly. As she pushed the door open and reached for the light switch a torch beam swung violently towards her, raking up and down her body. Dazzled, she let out an exclamation. Justin was standing by the desk, the two dogs beside him, tails wagging furiously. ‘Turn off that light!’ His furious whisper cut across the room.
‘Why?’ She spoke in her normal voice, suddenly furious. ‘What on earth are you doing here, skulking round like a burglar?’
‘I don’t want to wake my brother, that’s why!’ He strode across towards her, manhandled her away from the switch, clicked off the light and quietly pulled the door closed. ‘I’m sorry to wake you. I was trying to be quiet.’
‘Well, you didn’t succeed.’ She rubbed her arm where he had grabbed it none too gently. ‘Why on earth do you have to behave like this? Surely you and Mat are grown adults? You don’t have to creep around like some kind of unwelcome intruder.’
‘I am an unwelcome intruder.’ He glared at her, taking in her bare feet, her tousled hair, her short, unexpectedly revealing nightshirt, and suddenly he grinned. ‘Sorry. I can’t expect you to understand. It’s just easier if we don’t meet. I wanted to grab another couple of books before I leave. I’m going home tomorrow.’ He glanced at his wristwatch. ‘Today. There won’t be any time to hang around until Mat goes away somewhere so I can come here in daylight, so I thought I would pop in on my way by.’
Abi shook her head. A smile, however charming, was not going to win her over. ‘Well, I suppose it’s none of my business. And the dogs seem to think it’s all right.’ They were sitting one on either side of Justin gazing up at him with every sign of adoration.
‘Indeed. They will vouch for my good intentions. You can search me if you like. No stolen silver. No hidden cash. No stolen credit cards. And I will leave a note for Cal as I always do, telling her what books I’ve taken. I will leave it somewhere Mat won’t see it.’ His smile disappeared at the mention of his brother’s name.
Abi raised her hands in surrender. ‘OK. I’m off back to bed. I’ll pretend this was all a dream.’
‘Do that.’ He stood waiting. With a shrug she turned back to the door, then she paused. ‘I don’t suppose you would tell me why you and your brother hate each other so much?’
‘No, I couldn’t.’ He folded his arms. ‘Goodnight, Abi.’ He smiled again. ‘Sweet dreams.’
To her annoyance she found herself smiling back.
She woke late. When she reached the kitchen it was empty. A note on the table informed her that Cal and Mat had gone to Taunton and wouldn’t be back until late evening. ‘Sorry about this. Unexpected appointment. Don’t worry. We’ve got the dogs.’ She raised an eyebrow as she set about putting on the kettle and making coffee. So she was alone in the house. Unless…
The library was empty. She stood in the doorway looking round. The room felt deserted; there was no resonance there from her altercation with Justin in the middle of the night. Nothing. She wandered towards the shelf where Justin had been standing, running her hand across the backs of the books until she came to a space. What was it that was so interesting here that he had to keep coming back? She squinted at the titles on either side of the gap and pulled out Mrs Leyel’s
The Magic of Herbs.
Thoughtfully she ran her finger down the edge of the rough, handcut pages. Beyond it there were several other books on herbalism and ancient remedies. To the right of the gap was a set of Victorian guidebooks to the counties of England. She frowned. Were they all still there, or was one of them missing? She ran her eye along the shelf. So, he had either taken a guidebook or he had taken a book on herbalism. She wandered over to the desk. He said he would write a message to Cal. She wondered where he had hidden his note. The sound of car tyres on gravel disturbed her train of thought and she glanced out of the window. Kier’s Audi was pulling up outside the front door. He drew to a halt and climbed out. She froze. She was standing right by the window. He only had to glance her way and he would see her. He stood for a moment looking up at the front of the house, looking, she realised with a shiver of distaste, directly up at her bedroom window. Had he seen her up there last night, silhouetted against the light before she had drawn the curtains? She took a step backwards. Then another, not daring to turn her back on the window. If she could just reach the door she would be out of sight. Please God, let the outside doors be locked. His attention snapped back to the front door and he strode towards it. Seconds later the bell pealed through the house. She held her breath. He would be expecting to hear the dogs bark. As far as he was concerned her car was missing, it was still hidden round the back, and so was Cal and Mat’s. The house would look empty. Surely he would give up and go away. She tiptoed into the hall and as soon as she was out of sight of the windows raced along the passage to the back. Reaching the back door she turned the key and shot the bolt across before retracing her steps back to the passage. At least there was no window there; no way he could see her if he walked round the house peering in. Were there any other downstairs doors to the outside? She wasn’t sure. None that she had seen. Except the glass doors in the living room which led into the conservatory. She held her breath. They would be locked, surely. She crept back to the main hall, listening intently. There was no sound now from the front door. She pushed open the living room door and peered in. The doors to the conservatory were closed, but that didn’t mean they were locked. She threw a quick look at all the windows. There was no sign of Kier. Running across the polished oak boards with their scatter of old oriental rugs she reached the glass doors just as Kier appeared at the conservatory door.