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Authors: Kim Itae

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To John (4 page)

BOOK: To John
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Ana woke up with a severe headache
that morning. Someone on the street said 'is she still alive?' Of
course, that stranger was not talking about her. Possibly one of
old people living in apartment block in front of her house.

It was 11 Mar. She remembered the
date. A doctor came to her house 11 o'colock at night. He said to
her

"Are you still alive?"

She went to a surgery that
afternoon to check her blood. She had an unusually heavy period.
Lumps after lumps of blood came out. She felt dizzy and she could
hear the pumping noise in her ear. She came home after taking blood
test. The nurse said she could get the result within three or four
days.

That night, that doctor said,

"You might be one of a few living
human with that level of hemoglobin. I've never seen this low. Pack
and go to A&E."

She went to a hospital and got a
blood transfusion. Four bottles of someone else's fresh blood gave
her another life. She remembers the day.

Fukushima happened at the same
day.

Coincidence.

The severe headache reminds of
that day. Unusual type of headache. A few metal strings seem to
penetrate her brain in various directions. Piercing even through
her throat, ears, back of eyes, top of nose and gums. Very similar
to trigeminal neuralgia. She thought she had better to go hospital
next day.

"Military equipment, which US
could not sell to Middle East, are used by local police. Kind of a
clearance sale, which might cause unpleasant accidents. Very
unpleasant."

"John, all my family are going out
for dinner at Hong Kong Fusion. This is a birthday party. Big
meals, man."

Ana's little summary:

Petrodollar refers to United
States dollars earned through exports of petroleum(oil).

In an effort to prop up the value
of the dollar, Richard Nixon negotiated a deal with Saudi Arabia
that in exchange for arms and protection they would denominate all
future oil sales in U.S. dollars (Wikipedia)

- Saudi Arabia refused USD as
payment 10 years ago.

- The other day $316 bn were
sucked out from Petrodollars.

- The value of dollar became
insignificant in oil trade.

- US cannot use dollars for oil
any more like before. Also the end of QE means US cannot produce
dollars any more because of the devaluation risk. For example, the
sovereign default last year, bankrupcy. Same as any other business.
If you produce too much unredeemable cheques, you go bankrupt.
Twice already under Obama.

- Anyway the same chain: desperate
for KP pipeline, dangerous.

"John, devaluated Petrodollars
will bring down dollars too. Same family, no? We are on the right
track. Daily fun is a bit different, though."

"Hope you have a big fun tonight.
Very short, remember?"

2nd Week December 2014

08 Dec 2014

"Well fried beans. I can see some
of you burned your own fingers. I told you it's a lightening."

That morning, Ana sensed her
bother's existence through the screen.

'Carl, I know you are there. You
always sneered at my game. Now you are interested? You are 10 years
older than me, so I will not use B word.'

"John, I will see Mr. Bateman
today. See you later."

"Mr Bateman's itiniery: From next
Thursday: San Francisco, Sidney, Hong Kong & Dubai. He said he
would do his best to enjoy this long trip with old members of his
family."

"I will cook two sorts of fish
tonight. Mackrels and croakers."

"By the way, have you ever seen
LED flowers which blossom at night, John?"

"I wanted to marry to my brother
when I was little. He was so good. And he is still so good."

Brent crude oil fell more than a
dollar to around $68. (Reuter) Over supply. No war. The future of
petrodollars? Back to dark age.

"John, this is Carl. He is really
pissed off by oil price."

"Sorry, who is Carl?"

"He is one of my three elder
brothers."

"How do you know?"

"I feel it. More specifically. 1.
time of day. 2. his style. He is in New York. More specifically? He
is working with Morgan. Not for, with. Just look at the pulse. It's
mad. Madder than me. We used to call it Cocaine Shoot. And this is
just a little of pulling."

"When he shoots, he shoots."

Ana could hear his voice.

'Ana, you got scared? Go
home."

He was always the calmest, the
kindest brother. But when he said that, Ana went home quiet. She
got scared.

"John, this is not Carl. You see
the difference? You have no idea how much he can pull. I know
him."

"Go home. Do not make your pants
wet. Do not play with my brother."

When Carl saw Ana's future
husband, he just said,

"He is not one of us. And you know
it."

Then he left. He said he had to
realign his life. Her heart got broken. Now she was hearing him
saying ‘go, go, go…’

============================

"Do not move. Stay. Stay. Wait...
Wait for the wave..."

"I said, do not move."

"Cut."

"Ok, Ok. Keep going."

Those were the words Carl used to
use.

Time to time, he let her win like
any other old brother to his baby sister.

09 Dec 2014

"63.05 dollar/barrel
, -4.24%.
Scotland made a really good decision. Don't you think,
Johnny?"

"Don't call me that name."

Johnny? John was not in that
mood. His sleep was deeply disturbed. That was 2 o'clock in the
morning. 10 o'clcok in Tokyo.

Ana's homework list

1. Five year low. 2010.
Something finished or started at this year. Iraq, Afghanistan?

2. EU’s eastern members €315bn
fund. How will they invest the fund?

"Tony, Carl is messing my toys
again."

"He never did. He always tied
up your mess. I bet the same thing."

Antonio is still living in
Jerez with their parents. He became a ENT doctor like their
dad.

++++++++(Sod it)

"Two sticky cherries are left.
Half transparent. I inspected the element. There is a problem with
buttonPositioner. Visibility disrupted 12% upfront."

"We are entering into
God-Knows-How mode."

"I am waiting for a parcel
around 12:16."

"Two crops a day, not a year.
Life is short. The parcel arrived earlier than I expected."

"Exactly like the weather in
Cambridge, UK. A bit grey, cold, sun is just coming out. Slow
cooking before dark is rather suitable today. Warming up."

"The non-polar ninth heaven
king called me again. He asked me whether he can copy mine. I said
yes. He asked how much commission I want. I said no thank you. I
asked him not to call me again. He said yes. He said he got 20 boys
age under 17. He is indeed a nuts. But he will not call me again.
So I thought it's ok. Anyway copying is a common practice in
dealing. So what a big deal. Out of kindness, I told him not to
make them copy me after PM 4 as I have to cook. Also do not let
them play games during working hours. Tell them this is quite a
different game."

"Let me see who will have nose
bleed first."

"John, cooking time, just
us."

"Hope all the kids are gone to
bad by now. They do need nappy training."

"Actually I hate cooking.
Everyday. 5 days a week. Sometimes twice a day. I started as a
hobby. Now, look."

"Anyway, the last thing I want is
to get involved in illegal child labor in some foreign
countries."

'Carl, you dragged me into this. I
was only 7. You said that it's time to get in. You were 17. I am
still crying. I don't get scared. I just miss you. An Indian guy
called. He got some 17 year old boys to work. You were 17, weren't
you? The money is still game money to me. You didn't tell me that
you were recruited. A sweat shop. I feel weird today. Because I
didn't know you were copying me. Since when? That's why you were so
against my marriage. That's why I ran away from you. That's why I
went to Far East."

10 Dec 2014

"Morning briefing: 1. ECB is in
bonds market. 2. CIA, more ineffective and brutal than known"

1. Mario takes his time for
certain. Well known since his MIT days.

2. What could be more ineffective
and brutal than killing your own president, Kennedy? That
assassination was the turning point for USA economy since 1963. The
world saw what could be done by that ineffective and brutal
organization. 10 years later oil shock 1973 followed.

'What was the guy's name? Around
this time last year. There was a gun shooting in one of Pentagon
buildings in Washington. He was ex-army. He worked in the
underground array, 100 meters away from the Twin building. Very
fishy.'

"Morning John, I zipped all the
way up. Your turn to save it up to 1.57210 at least. I will see the
Will. You know him, don't you? See you."

"Ho ho, John, Will said I am
good."

After working in the sweat shop
for 6 six months, they can go wherever they want. Harvard, Mit,
Cambridge, Oxford, wherever. Then they will come back to their home
countries. Good money.

"John, you know what? Will said he
would introduce me into a beautiful and perfect world. If I do not
follow him, I would have a pain beyond imagination, which he had
been through. I did not said burger off as he was my supervisor. He
sounded confident. He must have got some nice fund one of his Quata
friend."

"Anyway his favorite song is still
'permanent blue mountain'."

"Too sleepy... I will sent a
postcard to my brother in Japan and get some nice pair of
pajamas."

"Sorry, Ana, how many brothers you
have?"

"Three elder brothers. That's all.
And my little twin brother. That's all."

"This brother of yours in Japan.
What is he doing there? May I ask?"

"He is teaching in University.
Economics. Nothing to do with us. I mean, me and Carl. How many
brothers you have, John?"

"I told you. Just one who made my
girlfriend pregnant. Forget it. I am trying to forget it. By the
way, what are you going to cook? Another slow cooking?"

"How do you know? Yes. Chilean
chicken soup, describing today, no? We will eat and digest it with
sweet corns. Start at 5, take 2-3 hours."

Carl used to say to Ana.

"If your nerves are too worn out,
do not touch anything, do not meed anybody, do not talk, do not
eat, just do nothing."

Ana thought

'What's wrong with me? I do
things. I cannot sit still. I had better start some meditation or
yoga kind of stuff. My nerves are everywhere. If I don't use it, I
will get clinically depresseed.'

She remembered his cool and very
well composed, cold and hansome face. She used to watch him when he
did that doing nothing pose. Very handsome. Even you cut his face,
he will not drop a tint of blood. He was somewhere else. Very far.
He was not there.

'I should have been diagnosed as
HAID? Or what was it? Fidgeting all the time... Hyperactive
something... I already have slight autism, dyslexia and serious
manic. Obessesive Compulsive Disorder, of course. Multiple
Character Disorder? Possible. Whatelse? Hypocondriac. Time to time,
ME. I am still fuctioning. I am not a bad person. I do not harm
other people. Why am I so disturbed whenever I think of Carl? He
always made me nervous.'

"Wrap it up."

"Peter the Buddhist contacted me.
I will see him Friday morning at 8:00."

'I do not want American friends.
They are killing people. They are hurting people. I do not want
them. They cannot be my friends.'

This is what your children and
your grandchildren will hear.

"Anybody, who goes down under my
volume 1.00 sell line, is dead tomorrow."

11 Dec 2014

"Turn on the unicode."

'I can see a few dead bodies. The
wave is strong enough. Verbindung. This will be the record of my
last month on earth.'

"Are you making purple candies
here, darling?"

"John, too many inbetweeners.
Jammed by the flow of human traffic. * * ::"

"Just try 10 min. You know red
jelly beans make me deadly sleepy."

Ana thought,

'Who said that optimisim is the
foundation of courage. The opposite. Courage make you optimistic.
Courage is the mind of ploughing a wild, rough field on and on
until you can see some proper field to put seeds in. So who said
that? It sounds like that American philosopher James something.
Pragmatic? You are in a deep trouble.'

Ana took a nap and had a dream.
She got shocked by the dream, so she wrote it down.

'When I opened the last door, I
saw a red monster. It got into my body. It looked like a fire
dragon. Fierce. Trying to penetrate every part of my body. So
painful. It tried to go out of my body. But my body was so blocked.
We both suffered.'

She did not know whether the red
monster is still in her body or not. It was a dream. She
dream-talked to the monster, 'Ok. If you are as blind as me, let's
live together. But time to time, you have to come out to fight for
me, otherwise I will starve. That will starve you to dearth too.'
That's how she kept 14 dragons in her body. All mixed up with
childhood dreams.

'Carl, Carl, I have dragons.' She
was four.

'How many?'

'Tree.' She
remembered her three fingers.

'Don't tell anybody.'

'Why?'

'They will put you in a
hospital.'

'They are not hurting me
anymore.'

'You don't understand. Anyway it's
a secret.'

'Why?'

'We brought them from heaven.'

'Why?'

'I will explain when you have
14.'

'When shall I have 14?'

'When you are quite old.'

'You are not lying, are you?'

'Don't tell anybody. Ok?
Promise?'

'Promise.'

BOOK: To John
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