Torn (34 page)

Jess sobbed quietly
the entire way home, but Adri refused to cry. She whimpered a couple
of times, but she somehow kept herself from breaking into outright
tears.

As we pulled up to the
house I lifted Adri out of the car, yelling for Donovan as I carried
her into the closest sitting room.

I was nearly wild with
concern by the time Donovan finally appeared with the
industrial-sized first aid kit. He nudged me out of the way and then
stripped off Adri's shoe. I held my breath as he prodded the injury,
releasing it only when I saw him relax slightly at what he'd found.

"Fortuitously,
it's not broken, but I'm afraid it's one of the uglier sprains I've
seen. I can take care of the pain though."

By the time we'd
swabbed Adri's ankle down with alcohol, injected it in several spots
and immobilized it, she'd calmed down fully.

Donovan surveyed our
efforts with a nod of approval and then stood up and repacked the
first aid kit.

"That should
take care of the pain and immobilize it so it can begin healing, but
it is vitally important that you don't put any weight on it Mistress
Paige. Please excuse me; I should go see to Mistress Jessica."

Even after everything
she'd just suffered through, Adri was worried about others.

"We should go
too. Poor Jess."

I gently stopped her
from rising as I shook my head.

"They've already
got her mostly settled down. James and Dom have already split off,
and Jasmin and Rachel will leave next. She just needs some time.
Time and Isaac."

She was silent for so
long I almost couldn't bring myself to say anything else.

"I'm sorry to
have ruined your night. I wanted it to be perfect. I should have
known that wasn't possible. Not with everything hanging over our
heads."

Adri's smile was so
sincere that it loosened the tightness in my chest.

"Everything was
almost perfect. If there was anything less than ideal, it wasn't
your fault."

It was wrong for me to
be so excited about what came next. It was a means to an end.
Everything she'd just suffered through just made it more imperative I
get her away to safety. I had to show her just how much there still
was to live for.

"Still, I'd like
to make it up to you. I suppose dancing is out, but I think I've got
something that'll do just about as well."

I bent down to pick
Adri up, only to find Jasmin staring at me from just outside the room
as I stood up. Still clad in the dark dress she'd worn to the dance,
Jasmin looked tired, but there was no waver in her gaze.

She was shielded from
Adri's view, and she sub vocalized, creating an odd sense of privacy
as I shifted Adri around in my arms.

"Don't send her
away, Alec. You need each other."

Jasmin disappeared as
I turned and headed out to the garden, moving with a speed that I
told myself had nothing to do with an effort to run from Jasmin's
words.

It took only a brief
time to arrive at the grotto, and find that Donovan had indeed
outdone himself.

The lack of moon meant
the only illumination was the floating lamps. There were almost
forty of them, nearly motionless in the petal-filled pool. I'd torn
the petals from dozens of roses in order to coat the surface of the
water, and the purple edging around the white somehow lent the scene
increased beauty beyond even what I'd expected.

The scent of the
potted roses with which we'd filled the space between the stone walls
had been divine all by itself, but once it mixed with Adri's natural
scent it became something beyond description.

Adri's voice quavered
slightly as she took in the results of our labor.

"Lagrimas."

I found my own voice
less then normally clear as I responded.

"Nothing else
would be appropriate. Not for you, not tonight."

I looked at the
waiting easel; its black, velvet covering held safely away from the
paint despite the cool, breeze tugging at the fabric. I circled the
grotto, listening to Adri's breathing and the quiet crash of the
waterfall, and then found myself deviating from the script I'd spent
hours agonizing over.

I shifted Adri around
into one arm as I reached up to the velvet covering.

"There's
something I'd like you to have. Something I hope will help you
remember what you mean to me..."

They were the wrong
words. Not the ones designed to remind her of her mortality, of
other magical nights to come, but rather the truth. I carefully
pulled the cloth away and then turned on the lights arranged around
the border of the piece.

Adri's breath caught
as she took in my efforts. I'd perfectly captured the grotto, the
same one we stood in now. In the picture the moon's brilliance
flooded down to meet with the soft glow of the greenery on the rock
walls.

What I hadn't done
justice to was Adri herself. She was the focal point, reaching out
from the center of the painting with the compassion and acceptance I
remembered, but the Adri I'd painted was a mere shadow of the beauty
in my arms.

"She's
beautiful. It's how I always imagined an angel would appear."

Something about her
words told me she didn't understand, that she'd somehow failed to
understand the identity of my subject.

"It's you, Adri.
Of course it's beautiful."

It made absolutely no
sense, but for the briefest moment it seemed as though she was going
to argue with me. I watched her expression shift through a range of
emotions I couldn't even begin to interpret, and then she turned back
towards me with the barest hint of tears in her eyes.

"It's so
beautiful. I don't know what to say. Are you sure you want to give
it up?"

It was the last
opportunity I was going to get. I tried to revert back to my script,
tried to ignore Jasmin's words, still echoing inside my mind, but
found myself unable to.

My need for Adri had
somehow become something beyond conscious control. I could no more
send her away than I could have stopped my lungs from drawing breath.
In the short term I could override survival-level instincts, but in
the long term they were always going to win out.

The emotions written
plainly on my face despite my best efforts to conceal them caused
amazement to flood Adri's face. She opened her mouth to say
something, but I found myself lifting her chin as my lips hesitantly
approached hers.

A sense of rightness
washed over me as we kissed. My senses seemed to mix and intensify
as she responded, clinging to me with all of her strength. I seemed
to be tasting moonlight as her pulse sped up to dangerous levels.

I wanted to lengthen
the gesture, to push her heart to even higher efforts as mine raced
to do the same, but as it started skipping beats I came back to
myself enough to pull away from her.

She'd tamed me utterly
and effortlessly, and I wanted nothing so much as I wanted to kiss
her again and again, but a tiny, vocal part of me knew I'd just
committed a terrible deed.

Adri had only just
barely regained her breath before she was pulling at me, seeking
another kiss. Physically it was a small matter to hold her away, but
it took nearly all of my will power not to let her succeed.

I buried my face in
her hair, wallowing in the scent of Adri and Lagrimas, and then
finally found the ability to speak again.

"I'd like to, I
truly would, but I don't think that would be fair to you. Even
letting that happen was a mistake. I've never come so close to
losing control."

The words came out
without conscious thought, but they were truer than she could
possibly know. I'd spent years learning how to control my beast, but
somehow a simple touch from her almost cracked the corresponding
control I'd created over the human pieces inside me.

Adri shook her head,
looking somehow even more beautiful in her contentment than ever
before.

"I don't think
it was a mistake. I want to kiss you again, but I'll behave."

"You like the
painting then?"

She nodded
emphatically, but the motion was interrupted by a shiver and I
suddenly realized how much the night air had cooled. She was
probably in shock from the injury; the last thing I should be doing
was letting her freeze to death.

"I'm sorry. I
forget sometimes how much easier it is for you and Rachel to catch a
chill. Let's get you inside where it's a bit more temperate."

She wanted to stay,
tried to argue with me, but I deftly shifted her into one arm and
then picked up the completed canvas with the other.

I carried Adri into
the house, and then tried to convince her to fall asleep, but she
refused. I let her pull me down onto the bed next to her, and then
nearly sprung back up when she told me that she was going to come to
the challenge with the rest of us.

The thought of
exposing her to that level of danger brought my beast roaring back to
the fore. Adri looked at my near complete lack of expression and
cocked her head at me.

"You weren't
planning on bringing me, were you?"

"It's not safe,
Adri. I don't want to leave you anymore than you want to be left,
but it's the only option."

She fisted her hands as she
shook her head.

"No it's not,
just bring me along."

It was the wrong thing
for her to be doing. Not only was she defying me, her body language
was too aggressive. No dominant could let defiance become the
general rule, it was against our fundamental wiring. I felt my fists
ball up in response, but fought to keep my composure.

"You heard
Mallory. The odds are very good that I'm not coming back. If the
worst happens, the rest of the pack may very well have to try and
fight their way out of there. They won't be able to get you out,
they'll be lucky to survive even fleeing unencumbered. I can't ask
them to run that gauntlet carrying you the whole way."

Adri unclenched one
hand, slowly raising it up to my face where she could touch my cheek
with just the lightest of sensations. It was like she was writing on
me with fire.

"Then don't ask
them. You'll either win, in which case it doesn't matter whether I'm
there or not, or else I don't care what happens."

The thought of leaving
her alone, completely at the mercy of the likes of Brandon and
Vincent bothered me on more levels than just the territoriality of my
beast, but that was the side of me that currently was driving the
fine tremble of a near transformation.

"Don't be
ridiculous, Adri. You should know at least a little by now what
they're capable of. I can't let you expose yourself to the kinds of
things Vincent or Brandon would...it's out of the question."

She looked up at me
with eyes that showed absolutely no fear despite how close I was to
losing control of the monster inside me.

"Alec, I need to
be there with you tonight. If you leave me here, I'll head out on my
own and look for you."

"I'll order
Donovan to keep you here."

My voice had deepened
as the barest beginnings of the change crept past my barriers.

"You can try.
He may even do it, but I don't think so. He's far too much the
gentleman to keep a lady captive against her will. Even if he does,
do you really think he can watch over me every second?"

A sudden picture of
Adri, broken and motionless while Brandon loomed over her was too
much and I felt my hands shift in a flash of heat and power. The
semi retractable claws that could mark steel tore into the foam and
springs of the mattress as I threw all my will at stopping the change
from going any further. She didn't even flinch at the sudden
dismemberment of sections of the bed. Her eyes hadn't changed, they
were still stubborn, still trusting and by far the most beautiful
things I'd ever seen.

"You're not going to scare me off
with cheap tricks. This is important."

She would have been a
fierce shape shifter. I felt myself shake slightly as a powerful
cocktail of emotions roared through me, but in the end I could no
more force her than I could have forced Jasmin or Rachel.

She was volunteering
for a death sentence, but it was her choice, and at least it would
give us a few more minutes together than we'd have otherwise.

"All right. You
can come. I don't like it. Don't like knowing you're guaranteed not
to survive my passing, but it's your choice."

She smiled at my
agreement, and then drew back as if she wasn't quite sure she could
believe me.

"Not that I'm
complaining mind you, but why the sudden change?"

I found myself
half-smiling. At least she couldn't read me enough yet to realize I
was no longer capable of lying to her, no longer capable of denying
her anything she really wanted.

"My death is
nearly certain, but there's always a chance I'll somehow survive. As
unlikely as that is, I don't want to survive and then find I've
poisoned you against me. I won't stop you."

I'd been unconsciously
listening to the sounds throughout the house as we'd been talking.
The white noise generator in the suite shared by Andrew, Jess and
Isaac was on. I'd heard James and Dom leave while we were still
outside. It was surprising just how quiet things had become with
two-thirds of the pack gone or behind privacy generators.

Adri reached over and
took my hand. The movement was absentminded, as if she wasn't really
thinking about what she was doing, but I should still have withdrawn
my hand. I didn't, and when she spoke it was hard to tell whether
she was talking about my having given her permission to accompany us,
or whether it was because of the contact.

"Thank you."

"You must have
driven your parents crazy with that refusal to back down."