Torn (The McKerricks Book 1) (6 page)

With a sigh I lean my head back and try to put Henley out of my mind. I can see Gwen studying me carefully, but she doesn
’t comment on my sudden change of mood, she just shrugs and goes back to reading her almost porn romance. Written by a woman whose whole body begs for sex even while her mind pushes the thought away.

“
Connor sweetheart help me set the table?” I glance back at my mothers pale blue eyes, and as the only other woman besides Gwen I can’t say no to, I slowly lift myself from the sofa with a sigh.

My languid mood has disappeared, and a tense anxiety has replaced it. An anxiety related to Henley, of course. She
’s at her apartment now, or at least I would think that is where she would be at. Probably writing that… those… words… she’s probably touching herself. In fact I’m sure she is. For the first time in my life, I can feel a blush caused by a woman creep over my skin, as I try desperately to scrub it away before anyone notices.

One of my mothers carefully manicured eyebrows raises in concern, and I know she can tell, as she turns toward the kitchen. When I finally work up the nerve to follow her into the kitchen, she is leaning with her back to the counter, with a look on her face that says she has a bullshit tolerance of zero right now.

“What’s wrong sweetheart? You were in such a good mood when you got here… and you’ve been acting so weird. You haven’t even been paying attention to Jessica. We all expected you to try and steal a quickie in the back by now.”

“
Okay Mom… never talk about stealing quickies anywhere, thats gross, and it’s just…” there is a girl that destroyed everything I tried to build in one fuck… yea right, like I’d ever admit to that. “Gwen is… reading porn,” I offer going with the least dreadful of the things on my mind.

She tries to hold her steady face for as long as she can before the soft laughter overtakes her.
“Connor, what are you talking about? She’s reading a romance book really.”

“
Have you looked in that thing Mom? Have you looked inside it?”

“
Oh honey I’ve read it. That particular author’s books are a little dark for my taste but the sex scenes are divine,” she replies with a smile.

I want to vomit. My mom is talking about sex. My mom is talking about Henley talking about sex. I hold up my hand before she can continue, shake my head and grab the plates. I really don
’t want to know. By the time we finish setting the table in silence, the game has ended and everyone makes their way over to eat.

My father starts the weekly ritual of catching up with his children by asking us how we are doing, what
’s new in our lives. Aiden and I don’t answer. How the hell am I going to say, oh just peachy, I’m only getting mind fucked by a five foot brunette, and Aiden? What the hell would he say? He’s about to break up with another girl that everyone at this table but him knew he shouldn’t have dated anyways. Hell he shouldn’t ever date. It is so much better just fucking. So Gwen is the one that speaks up.

“
I’m thinking about getting a tattoo,” she says softly looking dead at me.

“
Like hell you are,” Aiden growls out, as I let out a string of profanities that I am definitely going to hear about later.

“
What brought all this on?” My father asks sweetly, I’m not sure if I have ever seen anything throw him for a loop.

“
Well,” she says, watching me directly, “My new friend Henley,” she stops now, like she is making sure I’m paying attention, “She gets a new tattoo when she goes through a phase in her life.”

“
Ah, a reminder where you’ve come from, what a pleasant thought,” my father replies with a nod.

“
No way,” Aiden says firmly, “that’s so… un-womanly, right Connor?”

Everyone is watching me like a bug under a microscope, and why not? They all know I fucked this chick yesterday, they don
’t know I fucked her today too. “There is no way… that that green eyed bracelet hippie has a tattoo,” I reply firmly. With as much conviction as I can muster, but now my brain is on repeat. Henley has tattoos, and I didn’t take her clothes off and see them. I didn’t touch them. I didn’t taste them. Not that I care… because I most definitely don’t. She’s off limits.

“
Green eyed… Connor! Thank God you don’t keep them around long enough for them to hear you to bad mouth them!” Gwen says trying to appear as firm as possible, but her smile gives her away. “It’s not like she liked you anyways, what the way she left you hanging.”

I can see the glimmer in Gwen
’s eyes, she thinks she has won this fight. She thinks predictable Connor would never see the little author again. My lips pull tight in a grin as I lean in closer, and lie my ass off, because little Henley doesn’t even moan during sex. “That’s weird, cause she sure was screaming my name like she loved it when I fucked her this morning.”

When the color drains out of Gwen
’s face, it’s one point for me.

Chapter 6

It
’s been four days…
four days
. Four long days since I’ve had a woman, any woman. And the fact that the last woman I had was Henley, who I almost technically fucked twice is grating my nerves as I wait in the limo. Unfortunately Miss Hirsch was serious when she called about being seen in public, because she
did
contact my assistant, and now I’m stuck going to some benefits, which means donations, which means an improved public image that in turn raises stock prices. I should be happy about that, it’s making money after all, but all I can think is
four days
. That’s a lot of days to a guy that hasn’t skipped more than two days since I hit puberty. It’s like an itch that needs to be scratched but I cant find the right tool.

I
’m still waiting like that in silent agitation when Adalin Hirsch enters the limo. Her long dark hair and pale smooth skin should do it for me really they should, I should be able to scratch this itch without even trying right now, but I don’t bother. She’s too skinny, her tits are too small, and there isn’t a soft malleable curve on her body.

“
Miss Hirsch it’s a pleasure to see you again,” I offer as she takes a seat right next to me.

“
Call me Adalin, Connor, I am hoping that we will get to know each other much better in the coming weeks,” she replies softly resting her hand on the span right above my knee. Not far enough up to be an invitation, but close enough contact to suggest shes looking for a little more than friendship. Great.

“
Of course Adalin,” my game face is on, as I bring her hand to my lips and kiss her knuckles lightly. You don’t turn away any prospect of making money in this business, no matter the cost. I push sex from my mind, at least as far as I can, and focus on entertaining Adalin with small talk while we head toward tonight’s benefit.

When the limo stops, I have to force myself not to jump up and run. The sooner we get in the sooner I can find a place to leave her, while I find some
… entertainment for myself. But as we exit the limo, and a pleasant mask covers my face for the cameras, she has a tight grip on my upper arm. And even when we enter the building the grip doesn’t loosen, like she can sense I want to to bolt.

It isn
’t until she runs into a few of her friends about an hour later that I am able to pry her arm off and run. I give a polite greeting to clients and associates that I pass as I head for a darkened outdoor garden. I sit myself on one of the marble benches with a resigned sigh, as I try and contemplate this position I’ve ended up in. While it’s not terrible, it’s not good either. Not good at all. So far I haven’t made any extraneous attempts to copulate. So perhaps all I need is to just get back up on the horse, maybe then the dreams will stop plaguing me, and I’ll be able to properly end this dry spell. Maybe that’s all I need.  I’ve had my R&R and now it’s time to find someone else. I mean I can’t keep looking for short curvy brunettes with too much sass, not that I’m
looking
for women like Henley… not at all. I’m just looking to recreate the experience… that’s all. The fuck like your dying, personality altering orgasm experience.

With a sigh I lean back against the wall behind me and wait for my blood to cool down in the chilled night air. It
’s not long before some chattering catches my attention and I slit my eyes open to see two brunettes walk out into the garden. This is it. This is my chance, like God saying here are two hot women who meet your standards, go fuck. I can tell they are semi intoxicated by the way they are talking and bumping into each other, I wouldn’t even have to work for it.

It isn
’t long before they notice me sitting on the bench and they make their way over giggling all the while. They have definitely been drinking.

“
Hey handsome,” the taller one offers taking a seat next to me.

“
You look lonely,” the shorter one finishes as she sits on my opposite side.

Yeah
… I’m definitely not going to have to work for this. “Hello,” I offer back with my best smile. The kind of smile that wins women over. The kind of smile that gets them naked. If I don’t look at the short ones face, if I don’t look at her dull brown eyes, she is almost short and curvy enough to pass for Henley. Not that I’m trying to pretend a woman is Henley, because I’m not… but she might be able to replicate the mind blowing orgasm.

“
You look stressed,” Brunette number one says, the hot press of her body pushing closer. “Maybe we could take you somewhere more private to unwind.” Brunette two giggles at her friends words, and I laugh softly at the sound, almost like a squealing pig. I’ll have to face her away
and
keep her mouth shut.

“
I
am
pretty stressed,” I offer back. I don’t add that it’s because I can’t get a certain woman, and her hidden tattoo’s out of my mind. I even thought about searching for pictures of her that might show them, but that would be acting like I’m interested, and I don’t care about women. I don’t. Especially not green eyed ones with too much sass.

Brunette number two smiles back at me,
“We’ve got a room, why don’t you follow us up.” They each grab one of my arms and start escorting me back toward the building.

It doesn
’t take them long to stumble me into the elevator, all the while sneaking glances at each other and at me. And no sooner did we get on the empty elevator than we get off a few floors up and head toward their room.

I
’ve barely entered it before they throw their purses onto the bed and start stripping off their clothes. Drunk and horny, a lucky break for me. I’m just loosening the buttons on my suit, when I notice the book that tumbled out of one of the brunettes purses. Henley’s book. Her name is there staring up at me, like a physical entity cock blocking me. Shit.

I turn around, and the two brunettes are naked and eying me up like a prime choice of meat, and they plan to partake to the fullest. My dick isn
’t up, it’s not even interested in getting up. A week ago I would have relished in this, and that’s when I know. I know that I’m either going to have to become celibate, or I’m going to have to break some rules. Rules I’ve lived by since I was fifteen.

With a polite smile, I
’m forced to refuse something that I should be relishing in, and I
hate
Henley for it. For breaking me. “I’m sorry ladies, but I can’t do this after all. I have some… business to attend to.”

Their eyes are wide, almost incredulous as I walk past them and slip through the door. They are intoxicated and naked no doubt they will fill the void I
’ve left with each other. I make my way down the elevator, back toward the party. I just have to make it through here, back to my car and then safely hide myself at home while I figure this out. While I figure out how to remove this little author’s voodoo curse. Because surely I have been cursed. As I make my way through the party, I slip further into the shadows, when Adalin rounds the corner searching for me. Her delicate manicured eyebrows are drawn down into a frown that is at odds with her perky botox smile.

I make sure to stay out of sight, and when I am out of hearing range, I pull out my phone and call my assistant.

“Sir?”

“
I need you to send a bouquet to Adalin Hirsch, and have the car pulled around.”

“
That bad?”

I glance down at my still limp dick with a slight laugh.
“You have no fucking idea,” I reply before ending the call.

The car pulls up as I exit the building, and I slip gratefully inside. The leather interior is relaxing, a safe zone. Somewhere without women, somewhere that isn
’t tainted by Henley.

“
Take me home.”

The ride home is short, with only a light traffic. Plenty long enough to remind me that I am now probably celibate, but not so long that I decide to break any rules.

“Good evening Mr. McKerrick,” the receptionist in the lobby calls a forced smile on her face. “You have some mail sir.” She hands me a long cardboard tube, the kind posters come in, and goes back to her work.