Authors: Mary Sisson
Trang (24 page)
Philippe was not reassured. “I
mean, she’s not going to, you know,
do
anything—”
“Anything stupid? No, no, if she
said, ‘I’m going to
throw
a party,’ then you might have to talk her out
of it.” George patted Philippe’s shoulder. “Aren’t alien cultures fun?”
At Philippe’s request, George, who
was in the infirmary because he wanted to make another go at the Host
translation devices, left and brought him a camera and his comb. Philippe
neatened up and recorded a quick video report for the DiploCorps detailing what
was going on—normally he preferred text, but in this case he felt like the
people on Earth needed to see that he was fine.
“At the moment,” he said to the
cameras, “the position of the Cyclopes is that this was a rogue act and that it
does not indicate any hostile policy on their part. It is difficult to determine
the truth of that statement—the Cyclopes have been impatient to meet with us,
and they have expressed criticism of both the Hosts and our dependence upon the
Hosts. The attack may have stemmed from those dissatisfactions. In addition,
their history with the Magic Man is unknown to me, leaving open the possibility
that the attack was aimed at him.
“On the other hand, such attacks on
the station appear to be quite uncommon. I have never heard anyone refer to
one, and the attack on me has caused a great deal of concern among the aliens.
Surveillance footage suggests that the attack was random. As a result, I feel
that on an official level at least, we should accept the apologies of the
Cyclopes and maintain friendly relations.”
The door opened, and Raoul came in,
his hands filled with small devices. “George?” he said.
“Yeah?” George replied.
“Here you go,” said Raoul, handing
the devices to the doctor. “They should be here in about a half hour.”
George put the devices on a table
and began to look them over, pocketing each one once the inspection was
complete.
“You carry weapons?” asked
Philippe.
“Not usually, no,” said the doctor.
“But everyone in the SF is combat able, no matter what their job.”
Raoul laughed. “Combat able. You’ve
scrambled more eggs than any us!”
George smiled. “Well, I’m older.”
The two of them folded the
infirmary beds that were not currently supporting Philippe or inside the
isolation unit into the floor to make space for the aliens, and then Philippe
sent Raoul to get his translation mike. When he returned, Feo and Patch entered
the room with him. Philippe started—they were carrying some very large, very
intimidating-looking weaponry.
“Hey, you’re ready for the party!”
said George.
“We went with a festive look,” said
Raoul.
Patch must have noticed Philippe’s
concern, because he asked, “You OK, Trang?”
“Uh, yeah, I guess,” Philippe
replied. “I just wasn’t really expecting you to be carrying all that stuff
where everyone can see it.”
“We’re not in the common area,”
said Feo.
“I understand that,” said Philippe.
“Just keep in mind that the Cyclopes visiting me today are not the Cyclops who
attacked me.”
Patch asked the doctor about the
Hosts’ translation devices, which were visible through the clear walls of the
isolation unit. George launched into an explanation that, Philippe could see,
was making about as much sense to Patch as it had to him a few days before.
Feo took a position next to
Philippe’s side. “They’re not gonna talk, are they?” he asked.
“Who, the Cyclopes?” asked Philippe.
“I hope they do.”
“What kind of dumb question is
that?” asked Raoul.
“Hey, fuck you,” Feo snapped.
“They’re fucking boring, man, when they talk. They’re always, like, ‘extremely’
this or ‘extremely’ that. I hate it.”
“‘Emphatically,’” corrected Philippe.
“Whatever,” said Feo. “They need
to, like, learn other words or something.”
George and Patch had stopped
talking and were both trying to keep from sniggering, without much success.
“You are so fucking
stupid,
”
said Raoul.
“Keep talking, dick—” Feo began.
“Fellows, please,” said Philippe.
He glared at George and Patch, who composed themselves. “Feo, anything weird or
repetitive that you hear like that is probably because the translation
technology really isn’t that great. I mean, for all we know, we could be
talking to the Winston Churchills of the Cyclopes—”
“You don’t honestly think he knows
who—” Raoul interrupted.
“
Please,
Raoul, you’re not
helping” Philippe interrupted back. “You just have to keep in mind, Feo, that
you’re not hearing what they’re really saying, you’re just hearing the
translation, and frankly, I think the translations here could use some work.
You probably sound just as stilted to them.”
“I
don’t sound
stupid,
”
said Feo, heatedly.
“Fuck, you sound stupid just in
English, what do you think you sound like in some alien language?” Raoul asked.
“
You’re
stupid!”
“Everyone in the infirmary,”
Shanti’s voice sounded in Philippe’s ear, “stop the circle jerk. Our visitors
are about to come through the front door.”
Philippe turned to Feo. “Make sure
she remembers to turn off the no man’s zone!”
Feo looked at him, horrified. “Man,
I am not going to tell her that!”
“Please! I don’t have my com mike.
Please, please tell her.”
Feo made a face and hit his com.
“Philippe wants me to tell you not to forget to turn off the no man’s zone.” He
paused for a moment, and then he, Patch, George, and Raoul burst out laughing.
“You don’t want to know,” George
told Philippe.
“They’re in the no man’s zone, and
holy shit! They’re not dead!” Shanti’s sarcastic voice came through his
earplant. “The outer door is closed, and the inner door is opening.”
Her voice cut off. Philippe heard
footprints.
The door opened and two Cyclopes
entered the room. Philippe crossed his fingers under the covers.
“Greetings, human diplomat,” one of
them said.
“I take it this is Endless Courage
and Brave Loyalty?” he asked.
“It is,” said Brave Loyalty.
“I am so happy to see you,” said
Philippe. “It is very kind of you to visit.”
“We must visit,” said Endless
Courage. “We must assure you that your attacker was not representing the
Cyclopes in any official capacity when he attacked you.”
“What he did was a very
emphatically criminal action,” said Brave Loyalty. “Deception, attempted theft,
attacking an unarmed alien: These actions are very emphatically shameful. I
feel immense shame that a Cyclops would believe that engaging in such actions
is within the structure of the fields. It was shameful, emphatically shameful,
and very emphatically shameful.”
“He was not representing the Cyclopes
in any official capacity,” said Endless Courage.
“I would feel very emphatically
shameful were he acting as a representative of my people,” said Brave Loyalty.
“I have always thought that as a people, we should do better things than such
emphatically shameful actions.”
“I am certain that you are an
honorable people, and that this individual is not representative of the
Cyclopes. We have criminals, too, humans whom I hope you never meet,” said
Philippe. “Surely I would not want to have humanity judged by the actions of
such people, and I see no reason why the actions of a single criminal should
damage the budding friendship between the humans and the Cyclopes.”
He looked again at Brave Loyalty.
“Did you say that my attacker was a
thief?” he asked.
“He was apprehended in the personal
living quarters of a Host merchant,” said Endless Courage. “The Host merchant
had not invited him, and when the Host merchant saw him, the Cyclops escaped
and made that regrettable attack.”
“It was an emphatically shameful
attack and an emphatically shameful series of actions, outside the fields,”
said Brave Loyalty. “I am profoundly shamed by the entire series of events.”
“That is as it is,” said Endless
Courage. “This individual was not in the Host quarters as a representative of
our people. As a result, we do not know why he was there, although his
deception and his subsequent action indicate thievery.”
“And I understand he was killed by
my security experts,” said Philippe. If they had lied about that, they would
doubtless keep lying, but he wanted at least to eliminate the possibility of
accidental miscommunication.
“Yes, he was,” said Endless
Courage. “Your projectile weapons are very advanced.”
“But he was able to run,” said Feo.
“He was dead by the time he entered
our living area,” replied Endless Courage. “Our people can continue running
after death. We are not bipeds, so our balance does not require as much active
thought.”
“When he attacked me,” asked
Philippe, “did he use a weapon?”
“Not even a small amount,” said Brave
Loyalty. “Our people can produce electrical discharges as a natural defense
mechanism, as the Pincushions can produce poison.”
“But it is very emphatically not
poison, it is an electrical discharge,” said Endless Courage.
“That is interesting,” said Philippe.
“We have fish on our planet that can produce electrical charges.”
“They can’t direct the charge,
though,” George interjected. “They just produce an electrical field.”
“It takes practice to direct
electrical discharges with accuracy,” said Brave Loyalty. “Your attacker was
adept.”
“Are you immune to the charges?”
asked George, clearly intrigued. “Or can they hurt you?”
“Cyclopes can be hurt or killed by
such an electrical discharge,” replied Brave Loyalty.
George was obviously fascinated and
was about to ask another question, but Philippe didn’t want the conversation to
turn into a forum on comparative anatomy, so he jumped in.
“Who was the Cyclops who attacked
me?” he asked. “What was his name?”
“His name was Limitless Sacrifice,”
Brave Loyalty said.
“That is as it is. He was not an
important person,” said Endless Courage. “His family is not an important
family, but even they will be happy that he ran as he died and that he died
from a projectile.”
“Even so, please pass my regrets on
to his family,” said Philippe.
“Death creates life,” said Endless
Courage.
“Shame creates nothing,” said Brave
Loyalty, hastily.
“That is as it is,” replied Endless
Courage, equally hastily.
The two lapsed into silence.
“In any case,” Philippe resumed, “while
Limitless Sacrifice’s death may have been somewhat more acceptable in your
culture, I’m sure his family is still saddened by their loss. I would
appreciate it if you would be sure to let them know that I am sorry for what
happened.”
“Shit, I don’t believe this,” said
Feo quietly, in Spanish.
“Is there a problem?” Philippe
asked him, also in Spanish.
“What are you apologizing for?”
said Feo. “We killed that sorcerer because he attacked you, and you can’t be a
weakling about it. Tell them that if it happens again, we’ll kill them again.”
“What do you know about it?” said
Raoul, in Spanish.
“He has turned off his translation
device,” said Endless Courage to Brave Loyalty.
“No, I haven’t turned it off—” said
Philippe in Spanish. He stopped himself and switched to Union English. “No, I
have not turned off my translation device—communicating with you is far too
important for me to do something like that. It is simply that this security
expert is more comfortable expressing himself in a language that is too obscure
to be programmed into the translation devices.”
“Spanish isn’t obscure!” said Feo.
“For the love of God, will you shut
your mouth!” said Raoul.
“Fuck your mother!”
“What my security expert is
saying,” Philippe interrupted, “is that while we all regret the death of
Limitless Sacrifice, from a security point of view, the situation was handled
very well. Were the situation to reoccur in the future, our response would be
the same. We were attacked without provocation, and the attacker was
neutralized, which was appropriate and desirable. I agree with that evaluation,
as I am sure all humans do.”
“We agree with that evaluation,”
said Endless Courage. “We would respond in the same manner if such an attack
were conducted against a Cyclops.”
“Let me explain your comment to our
security expert, since he is so limited,” said Raoul. “You stupid pussy, the
next time I get you in this room, I’m going to shove an enema up your ass with
such force that your eyes will fall out of their sockets.”
“You’re making me horny! What a big
train!” sneered Feo.
“Not another word, either of you!
You are idiots, the two of you, and I am going to have you shot by your boss if
you don’t shut your mouths!” snapped Philippe. He turned to the Cyclopes and
smiled. “I am so pleased that we have reached an understanding on this issue. I
wish to assure you that since the attacker was killed, my people consider this
unfortunate matter settled and look forward to having a friendly relationship
with your people.”
“We do not consider this incident
settled,” said Endless Courage. “I wish to give you a gift as a gesture of our
regret and as a testimony to the capability of your security experts. I did not
bring it here because I was concerned that you might view it as a security
threat, but since you wish to have a friendship with us now, I wish to retrieve
it and to bring it to you.”