Tuesday Night Miracles (24 page)

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Authors: Kris Radish

Tags: #Fiction, #Contemporary Women, #Sagas, #Humorous, #General

BOOK: Tuesday Night Miracles
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30

The Third Assignment

I
t’s 2
P.M
. on Saturday and Dr. Olivia Bayer is trying without success not to show up at the next assignment with her feisty little charges. Even though she’s trusting that everything is going to work out, she has decided to leash up Phyllis and stroll past the building where Leah, Kit, Grace, and Jane had better be right this second. In an unusual moment of self-doubt, the great Dr. Bayer is trying to decide whether she should bring Leah, Kit, Grace, and Jane back in for a meeting on Tuesday to talk about whatever might happen during what she is calling Bowling 101.

She sent each of the women the exact same note telling them where to meet, but they won’t know what’s happening until they show up:

Please show up at Digger’s Bowling Alley Saturday at 2
P.M
.—2235 Center Street. I trust this will work with your schedule. Give your name at the shoe-rental counter. Then proceed to Lane No. 10. Bowl three games, more if you care to—and enjoy. Everything is paid for, so no worries there. Keep writing in your journals, and I trust you will have nothing but good news for me the next time I see you! You know how to contact me, but this should be pretty simple.
Sincerely,
Dr. B.

Leah’s note asked her to use the shelter’s van for transportation. Dr. Bayer wanted them all to be surprised when they got there.

And Olivia can’t stand the suspense.

“Phyllis, let’s take a stroll,” she says, as Phyllis leaps like a circus animal the moment she hears the leash chain dragging in the hall. “We’ll just peek, that’s all.”

The leash means they’re going for a long walk, and that also means there’s usually food involved somewhere along the way. Phyllis is so excited about this new development that she all but drags Olivia down the steps to the big tree.

While Phyllis takes care of her doggy duties and Olivia tries to still her beating heart that has been hammering away inside her chest with worry over this interesting assignment, the women start to arrive at the neighborhood bowling alley.

Grace, of course, arrives first and is putting on her shoes when Jane walks in, followed by Kit and then Leah.

“We should have known,” Grace says, laughing. “Or did we?”

“I thought she might do something like this,” Kit says, grabbing a pair of red-white-and-blue bowling shoes. “That woman is hilarious.”

Jane is quiet at first, but then she approaches Grace and asks if she’s okay. “Can you even bowl?”

“I hate bowling! But my foot is okay. Just a little sore. You didn’t bring your archery equipment, did you?”

Jane laughs off the question as she grabs her shoes, and the women all form a little procession on the way to their reserved alley, which is, thankfully, the last alley and next to a wall. To get there they have to walk behind seats, over a mess of kids, and past a bar that is doing a bang-up business selling beer, pizza, and bags of snacks.

Even Leah, who rarely drinks, is glad to see that there’s beer. All of them have apparently decided to ignore the arrow-in-the-foot fiasco for the time being.

They throw their purses around the table and then stand and look at each other until Kit says she thinks they should probably get balls if they’re going to bowl. “I know Dr. B. probably thinks we have balls, but I don’t think we can actually use those for bowling.”

“You
are
a comedian,” Jane says, hoping no one, especially Grace, will take offense.

No one says a word except Kit. “If you think that’s funny, wait until you see me drop a ball. Grace, keep your one good foot covered.”

And so it begins, and Dr. Bayer, who is approaching the bowling alley, is glad she doesn’t hear screaming around two-thirty, when she figures the women will be getting started. Phyllis feels like a tiger. She loves to hit the streets like this and is so distracted by the sights and sounds of the busy day that she doesn’t even realize they’ve stopped.

While Olivia starts pacing outside the bowling alley the women, who have spent twenty minutes picking out balls, are trying to remember how to keep score. They haven’t been bowling for so long that they don’t even know there’s an automatic scoring machine. The boy who comes to help them set up the scoring looks at them as if he’s frightened.

Maybe it’s because they’re being so silly. Bowling is serious for a lot of people, but these four women can’t seem to stop laughing. He sets everything up, hopes no one gets hurt, and then walks away as quickly as possible.

“Let the games begin!” Jane shouts as she grabs the first ball and tries to remember what to do. She turns to see what the people in the next lane are doing, and then she holds the ball against her chest, lets it go, and her cute glittery red ball goes right into the gutter.

Jane puts her hands on her hips, turns around, and yells, “This sucks!”

It takes her bowling mates a few seconds to realize that she’s kidding, and almost a half hour for anyone else to knock down more than six pins. This Tuesday-night group of once angry women could be the worst bowlers in the world.

But the strangest thing happens during the next ninety minutes. The only thing they talk about is bowling. They don’t talk about the anger class or their private assignments or bows and arrows. They only talk about bowling. And with every ball they throw it’s as if they’re gaining strength. They may have been a bit reticent when they first realized the entire class was going to be there, but they’re all lousy bowlers and no one seems to care.

Meanwhile, Olivia has walked around the block and down through the alley three times. The bowling-alley manager notices her when he comes out for his second cigarette and smiles.

“You can bring your dog inside, you know,” he tells her, waving the stinky cigarette smoke away from his face. “That’s the cutest damn dog I’ve ever seen.”

Olivia is suddenly excited. “Are you serious?”

“Oh hell, yes,” he snorts. “I run this place, and my little dog is getting groomed today or she’d be here, too. People would love it if your baby came in here. Are you here to bowl?”

Olivia hesitates. What should she say? A group of women who are in big trouble are in there and I’m their clinical psychologist? She has to stifle a laugh.

“Some friends of mine are in there,” she manages to explain. “I’d love to go in.”

“Be my guest,” he says, stopping Olivia so he can pet Phyllis, who decides to lick his hands.
Meat!
Phyllis wants to keep licking.
This man has touched meat!

Inside, Kit buys everyone a round of beers and then Grace buys a round and then Kit really does drop her ball, but not on Grace’s other foot. She drops it on the wooden alley and it bounces into the next alley, and the man trying to bowl falls and Kit is mortified.

“I’m sorry!” she yells, running to help him.

“You women are crazy.”

“We know,” she admits, while Leah, Jane, and Grace huddle behind her. “But we’re having fun. Does that count?”

He looks at them as if he might be a candidate for the next anger class, dismisses them with his large waving hands, and then the bowling continues.

Moments later, all four of them turn when they hear commotion out in the lounge area behind the alleys. There’s a horde of people bending down, and everyone seems to be focused on something that’s on the floor.

Olivia sees the four women the moment they see her.

“Hello, girls!” She waves, absolutely thrilled that they’re all still alive and no one appears to be bleeding.

“Dr. Bayer!” they all shout at once, as they move toward her.

Then they see the star of the floor show. It’s Phyllis, moving in circles as one after another man, woman, and child pets her. Phyllis can’t believe where they are. It smells like old food and feet and grease, and she’s dying to go sniff every corner.

“Is that your dog?” Grace asks, as Dr. Bayer momentarily passes the leash to a little blond girl.

“This is Phyllis. Phyllis, meet Grace, Leah, Jane, and Kit.”

True to form, Phyllis walks over to Grace and wags her tail as if she’s been waiting for her all day. In two seconds, all four women are all but drooling over her. Phyllis smiles at Olivia as Olivia takes back the leash and shakes her head, smiling with pride at her little dog star.

Olivia orders them back to their game and follows them. Phyllis gets distracted by the rows of bright-colored shoes lined up against the wall, and Olivia gives her a moment to sniff and then joins the women on their alley.

“Is this one of your regular Saturday stops, Dr. Bayer?” Jane jokes, as the women continue to bowl.

“I can’t say that it is, dear,” Olivia responds, while Phyllis forces herself to lie still. She chuckles. “After the arrow incident, I thought I’d better see what happens with bowling balls.”

During the next hour, the five women talk about everything from bowling to the weather. Olivia finds it interesting and somewhat frustrating that none of them is being personal or opening up beyond the surface.

Finally, with one more game yet to go, Jane picks up her ball when it’s her turn but then stops in front of everyone.

“Okay, I’ve had it with this bowling shit and I propose we skip the last game. I’ll treat us to some pizza and more beer, and then we can sit around and boast about our bowling scores. Are you in?”

“Is this okay?” Leah asks, looking directly at Dr. Bayer.

“Of course, dear,” Olivia responds, standing up as if she’s going to leave.

“No!” Jane shouts. “Stay! Do you have to be someplace?”

Dr. Bayer turns totally white. How absolutely pathetic is it that she’s at this bowling alley and that she really doesn’t have anywhere else to go on a Saturday afternoon.

Before she can say anything, Phyllis totally loses control. She’s been watching those huge balls go back and forth on all of the bowling alleys and she can’t take it anymore. She jerks out of Olivia’s hand and heads for the lane adjacent to the one the women have been using. Phyllis is after a bright green ball and she’s barking as she skitters on the slick wooden floor and begins sliding down the alley on her rear end.

“Phyllis!” Olivia shouts, laughing at the sight of her out-of-control dog. “Come back here!”

The entire bowling alley erupts in applause as Phyllis skids to a stop, then bows her head and slowly walks back to Olivia to face the consequences.

“Oh!” Kit stammers. “Please don’t yell at her.”

Dr. Bayer turns slowly to look at Kit and the other three women, who are standing in a row and staring at her.

“But she made a mistake,” Olivia tells them, in a serious way that means so much more than just that. “I will simply raise my voice a bit to make it clear I expect better behavior. She knows better.”

After Phyllis has apologized by putting her right paw into Olivia’s left hand, the women gladly deposit their bowling balls, shed their smelly shoes, and walk to the back tables, where Jane orders pizza and Phyllis sits obediently under Olivia’s chair.

Olivia declines a beer but is glad the women seem to be enjoying themselves. “I didn’t mean to intrude,” she says, sipping a glass of water, and refusing pizza.

“Intrude?” Grace says, wiping her mouth with a napkin. “I’m glad you came. And don’t take this wrong, but seeing you with Phyllis makes you seem, well, more human.”

“Am I that bad?”

“No!” Grace exclaims. “That’s not what I mean. It’s easy to think that people who do what you do don’t understand what mess-ups like us are going through.”

Grace’s voice trails off, and Olivia clutches her slacks to keep from talking.
Let them do this
, she has to remind herself, hoping they begin to open up a bit.

“Grace?” Kit asks, leaning over to make certain Grace is okay.

“I’m fine, sort of,” she lies. “It’s just that this class, even being here, it’s made me think of so many other things. I think I’ve developed high blood pressure, I feel totally out of shape, I’m worried about being a bad mother.”

Phyllis shifts and then lifts her head. Someone has dropped a piece of pizza crust. Holy cow! Phyllis decides to play it cool. Maybe she can snag it on the way out.

Kit puts her hand on Grace’s arm, and Olivia feels as if she might faint.
Affection! Sharing!
She is so excited that she drops the leash and places her hands on top of the table. Then Olivia holds her breath.

“Grace, I think we all feel like failures some of the time,” Kit shares. She drops her eyes and takes a chance.

Kit tells them about the newspaper article she read describing the woman who killed her mother and how it made her think about her mistakes, too, and of all of them. “We have an opportunity now,” she tells them. “We made mistakes and we’ll make more of them, but sitting in my kitchen, alone again, I thought of all of you and how we have so much in common and how we can get through this.”

Leah is staring at Kit.
She thinks they have a lot in common? Am I the crazy one here?

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