Twin Flames: Soul Memory (10 page)

“
And you will always be my heart.”

“
You flatter me.”

“
No, I love you. You are a part of me. The best part.” He
tipped his head back as Joy scooted up next to him, so they were
both lounging, her head against his. “You’re everything that is
right with this world.”

He tugged on the strand of hair that brushed his cheek, until
Joy’s mouth was near his. With gentle care, he touched her lips
with the tip of his tongue, tracing the seam until he gained access
to the treasure he desired.

Joy was the most beautiful creature in the world. Her inner
confidence shone like a beacon in a storm.

Hunger ramped up as heat built to boiling between them. Jairo
brought her closer and she willingly went where he led. His heart
expanded at the love and trust Joy showed in him. They were still
very new to the relationship they found themselves. He believed
they would make it through the snags when they appeared, because of
this sense of belonging.

They were home to each other and whole…for the first time in
their lives.

* * *
*

Joy wanted to climb inside Jairo and stay there. Their love
and acceptance was more than she could ever ask for. Having found
it, she never wanted to let it go. Ever.

Are you worthy of the profoundness in what you two
share?

Startled by those concerns, she pulled back and rested her
head on his shoulder. Her nose buried against his pulse. Its rapid
tempo spoke loud and clear what Jairo felt.

He wanted her.

She waited for him to make the move to instigate sex. When he
continued to hold her to him in silence, Joy sighed. He was the
most beautiful male in the world and he loved her. What more could
she ask for?

“
Can we make this work, Jairo?” She hadn’t wanted to break the
peace that encased them, but her fear refused to leave it alone.
“I’m an American, born and raised. You’re a Calanthian, born and
raised. We’re two very different nationalities and
backgrounds.”

“
I believe we can, baby.” His chin nudged the top of her head
and she smiled.

“
But you said you don’t have beliefs or faith.”

“
I believe in you and I have faith in us.”

“
Honest?”

“
Honest.” Jairo chuckled and squeezed her close. “Now, where
were we?”

“
You were showing me how much you loved me.” Joy tipped her
mouth toward his in a silent plea, knowing he would take the hint
and kiss her.

The second his lips claimed hers, her heart pounded and breath
caught. She’d heard of women who lost their breath when men kissed
them. They’d say “he stole my breath away”…Jairo did that to her.
Every time he used to call, her pulse would race and her heart
literally skipped beats. The air would catch in her lungs and she’d
get lightheaded and have to sit down.

While growing up Joy honestly believed the romantic stories
were over-exaggerated. Her grandparents’ had overplayed the actual
happenings of
Twin Flames
.

They weren’t, at least not where Jairo and her were
concerned.

* * *
*

She breathed in and opened her eyes. Joy hadn’t planned on
meditating right then, but it seemed her mind had other ideas.
Allowing her mind to clear and wander kept the throbbing down,
although nothing stopped the pain.

“
Jairo…”

Of everything she kept seeing, he had the starring
role.

The remnants of the vision continued to play out, she tried to
place where they were. The bedroom was rustic, like a cabin of some
variety. There had been claps of thunder and flashes of lightening,
a summer storm?

Why had she gone there? Why was he there?

More and more questions seemed to pop up with every dream
slash vision she had.

Joy concluded the ones she had in the beginning were early on.
Like the first times the two of them connected on purpose with each
other. Curiosity and encouragement drove them in those. He was her
strength she learned. As they evolved, they moved closer to
something bigger.

Wherever Jairo was, that was where she wanted to be. Something
told her he’d have the answers to what happened to her
memories.

Lifting her arms over her head, she stretched, unfolded her
legs, and stood.

Joy glanced out the living room window to the darkening
clouds. She flipped on the lamp and stepped closer to the glass. A
summer storm was brewing, the air thick with moisture.

This was where she lived, but it was not her home.

Jairo was her home.

“
What exactly are you asking for Joy?” Jairo’s pulse stopped,
dread flooded him. By her expression, he knew this was not
something he wanted to hear.

“
I’m saying I need some time alone to think.” Her chin lifted
in that maddening manner endearing her and annoying the hell out of
him.

“
Why?” His heart constricted as pain expanded outward. She had
given him a taste of heaven and now Joy yanked it cruelly away. And
for what?

“
Why
?” She threw her hands up and turned away only to
turn back. “Look at us. We’ve only known each other a handful of
weeks. We have not ever met in person, haven’t touched physically,
and yet we’re all over each other when we dream. Our phone calls
last for hours as if no time passes and you aren’t bothered by
that? You know me in a way I allow no other. All my secrets are
open to your intent gaze. Doesn’t any of this bother
you?”

Jairo knew better than to question the Ancient Gods, because
he wasn’t ever given the answers he wanted when he wanted them. So
why bother inquiring? Did he wonder about matters he had no control
over? Yeah, he did, but had learned to accept them as a part of the
bigger picture, even if he couldn’t see it in that exact
moment.

“
Certain things you just don’t question, Joy. This is one of
them.” He stiffened as fear spread throughout his body. He didn’t
want to beg her to stay with him. “I accept we were meant to be
introduced through my sister. I accept a meeting in person will
eventually happen, when the time is right. We are one person, one
soul.”

“
But that’s not what they say is possible.” A muscle in her
jaw twitched.

Jairo knew he was slowly losing her, but for what reason? What
was interfering?

“
With an open mind and heart, Joy, any and everything is
possible.” He clenched his hand at his side, wanting to touch and
hold her, soothe the ache he felt emanating from her. “If your
blinders are off you see me for who I truly am and love me
regardless, as I love you.”

“
Couples
verbally
get to know one another, they
have
secrets. Parts of
their lives and memories remain buried deep. They can’t read each
other’s mind and speak mentally to one another. That’s science
fiction or paranormal.
Not
the real world with real relationships, it’s a fantasy to
have that sort of acceptance from another human being. It just
doesn’t happen.”

“
But we aren’t full human.”

“
You know what I mean.” Her arms crossed over her chest,
protectively.

“
So, what you’re saying is because of what everyone else says
is right, true and real you have to think about us, our connection?
What we mean to each other? Really?”

Joy gave a frustrated sigh and shoved her hands through her
long wavy hair. Jairo knew she battled with the contradictions in
her life and dealt with a balancing act most high wire pros would
envy. Now, however, she had to face that part of who she was. She
could no longer pretend she was a full-blooded human without
special capabilities. That shape-shifters and hybrids were not a
part of folklore and myth, but in fact, real.

“
I have to be able to look myself in the mirror every morning.
I have to live with myself and my decisions. You’re here, real, not
a figment of my imagination. I need to come to terms with that on
my own.”

“
Are you saying I’ll distract you?”

“
No—well, not intentionally. I know you won’t, but will I
sidetrack myself? Any decision I make I have to make it on my own,
without distractions of any kind.”

“
How will you do that?”

“
Go away for a while.” She clasped her hands together in front
of her. He detested her defensive actions. “I can’t think with my
mother going on about what’s right and what I’m supposed to do
according to her beliefs. I need silence, away from
her.”

Jairo’s heart continued to pound painfully against his ribs in
fear and uncertainty. Joy had the power to destroy him and didn’t
even realize it. Her having lived life as a human and not a hybrid
meant her thinking was logical…about almost everything.

For her, what the two of them felt for each other was
overwhelming and not real.

How could he fight that?

* * *
*

“
What’s happening, Doctor?” Jezzaray’s worried voice broke
through the haze that covered his mind with the last
dream.

He wanted to cry and scream at the unfairness of life. Why had
she left him? Why did she have to think about them? He did not
understand.

Clicking and metallic bleeps sounded as the patter of feet
shuffled around.

“
Your brother is dreaming.”

“
Every machine connected to him went off. None of the other
times that happened.”

“
It would appear he had a nightmare.”

“
A fucking nightmare? Seriously?” His sister’s huff fluttered
around him. He tried to move his mouth.

The longer he stayed prone the harder Jezzaray was gonna hit
him when he did finally wake up and he deserved it. And so much
more.

“
As I’m sure you were told the brain is the least understood
organ in the body. These are set to monitor his vitals, all of
them. Yes, when he dreams they blink and beep. A nightmare will
produce alarms and bells ringing because of his fear. Euphoria,
adrenaline, they each fire responses and the computers pick them
up, it’s all normal I assure you.”

Normal for whom, he wanted to ask.

* * *
*

She half-listened to the woman claiming to be her mother as
she spoke and walked around the living room. Joy’s attention
focused on the framed photos. Her image was in each one. Some she’s
alone, others with siblings, parents, and even more family members.
None tickled her memory. They were portraits on the wall of someone
else’s home.

Complete strangers, who are your family, dummy.

“
Are you listening to me, Joy?” the older woman
demanded.

“
I am,” she called back, her gaze drawn to, she assumed, the
newest addition.

Lifting the frame, she found the date, six months previous.
She replaced it and stepped closer to study the features of the
people gathered.

She touched her cheek in awe. The woman that held her likeness
was in love…deeply in love. Stunned she stood there, a man that she
loved was somewhere out in the world.

Not once had her
mother
said anything about a boyfriend or husband.
Neither had the older man, her father, who greeted her at the door,
smiled, and hugged her close. He pulled back, his expression one of
concern and worry.

Joy decided against telling her “family” she lost her memory.
The gentleman who smelled of peppermint and tobacco sensed a
difference in her. He didn’t say anything and the men who were her
brothers or her single sister hadn’t either.

Was that the “Jairo” on her computer? The photos she still
could not look at without crying.

Even after all these days, she couldn’t open the named file.
She tried. But violent tremors shook her and a piercing pain thrust
through her temples. Joy closed it without searching further. She
hadn’t been able to move for two days without getting sick
afterward. Whatever was wrong with her could not just be memory
loss. Something had to explain the shakes and migraines.

The doctors found nothing when they ran their barrage of
tests. They just tossed more useless medicine at her with a list of
restrictions.

“
Come stand in the kitchen with me.” The older woman stuck her
head through the entryway.

Startled, Joy jumped back and crossed her arms.
“Sure.”

The woman who gave birth to her made her uneasy. She appeared
kindhearted and loving with a tinge of underlying confusion and
contradictions.

“
You have got to stop living in the dream world.” Her mother
moved around the room preparing food; Joy leaned against the
doorframe, leery. “It’s not healthy. In the end, you’ll only get
hurt. I should’ve never let your grandparents fill your head with
that fantasy gibberish. They’re nothing but make-believe childish
fairy tales.”