Unbidden Love (Book Five of the Bidden Series) (4 page)

‘What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” he shouted after her as she stormed out of the room.

‘It means that from this minute forward I do not give a shit what you do, James. I will be damned if I let you completely destroy my life in your quest to destroy your own.’

James flung the glass into the fireplace and watched as it shattered into the flames. No matter how angry he was still, he could not leave things unsettled with Audra. There was more history between them than he shared with any other woman. They could survive this. It would take time, but they owed it to each other to try. Whatever their feelings were towards each other - or for the others in their lives - James and Audra were a pair. A team. Family.

And he needed family more than anything.

Natalie stared into Audra's chestnut brown eyes, not sure if she was really looking at the woman sitting in the middle of her bed, or if she was merely imagining it.

"Am I sleepwalking?"

"No? Why, do you think this is a dream?"

Natalie reached behind her back to close the bedroom door, then leaned against it. "Actually, no. You are usually naked in my dreams."

"You know, I considered doing the whole wait-for-you-naked-on-the-bed routine, but I decided to err on the side of caution. What if you didn’t want to see me naked? Or see me at all?”

Natalie took a moment to look at Audra there in her room - she really was there - before setting the belongings in her hands on a nearby chair and fishing through her nightstand for something to wear. She needed a moment to acclimate herself to the idea of Audra Robertson being there with her all of a sudden. The words 'I think I love you too' kept repeating over and over in her mind, taunting her. She settled on a simple white tee shirt and plain underwear before stripping off the towel and slipping into the fresh clothing. Her hair dripped water onto the cotton fabric at her shoulders, immediately soaking the material. When she turned around again to face Audra, Natalie was struck by her beauty. She looked like a goddess surrounded by candlelight, possessed with a cool composure Natalie could only hope to mimic. Finally the words she was looking for came to her mind.

"I do not want to fight or have some kind of emotional reunion. I am not interested in having any length of conversation about who we are or what we mean to each other or to other people. All I want to do is crawl into bed, relax, and not wake up to an alarm or get up for any other reason than to go to the bathroom."

Audra stood from the bed and began to undress, shimmying out of her blouse and skinny jeans until she was left in nothing but her bra and panties. She pulled back a corner from the made bed and looked up to Natalie with a serene smile. "Come to bed."

Natalie woke to the familiar sound of electronic tapping. She opened one eye against the brightness of the mid-afternoon sun and winced. Why hadn't she thought to close the curtains before falling asleep? She opened her other eye and focused on the woman beside her. Clad in nothing but her bra, panties, and a pair of chic reading glasses, Audra was propped up against the pillows and headboard, typing sporadically on her phone.

She looked stunning. Absolutely beautiful.

"Do you always look like that when you wake up in the morning?" Natalie asked.

Audra smiled from the corner of her mouth and lifted an eyebrow. "No. I usually sleep naked."

"That is the second time you have mentioned being nude.”

“Said the girl who dreams about me being naked.”

“Are you teasing me on purpose or are you really this flirtatious?"

Audra set down her phone on the nightstand and turned to face Natalie. "Both." Her growing smile could not be contained to just the corners of her mouth. "You should know I have been awake for hours and have found it very difficult to resist the urge to touch you."

Natalie's heartbeat quickened in her chest. "Is that so?"

Audra nodded. "Mmm-hmmm. Every time you moved even a little that damn shirt rose up just a little bit higher. I had to check my email just to keep my hands busy."

Natalie parted her lips to breathe properly. Was this really happening? It couldn't be a coincidence that Audra's arrival coincided with Jackson Fitzgerald's. First James decides to step back from the business, and then Audra shows up as if the past few weeks of scant communication never happened? Then there was their last conversation; the declarations made and hopes dashed.

"What happened?"

Audra's face fell slightly before she slipped her glasses off her face and set them on the nightstand next to her phone. She straightened her posture, crossed her legs and looked at Natalie expectantly.

"James is taking a leave of absence."

"I know," Natalie murmured. When she saw the look of surprise on Audra's face she added, "Jackson Fitzgerald came by the club this morning just as I was heading home."

Audra shook her head. "Of course he did. Do not let his casual nonchalance fool you, Nat. He has been wanting to meet you for a while."

Natalie mirrored her posture to Audra's and pulled the comforter up around her thighs. "I kind of wish I had been wearing more than a coat and stockings at the time."

Audra's head whipped around to face Natalie. "Were you really?"

"Yes," Natalie sighed. "I had just come down from the penthouse."

Audra pursed her lips. "Right. I forgot you have been participating recently."

Natalie softened her voice before asking, "Does it bother you?"

"Well I would be a hypocrite if I said that it did, wouldn't I?"

"Not necessarily."

"From a business perspective I am totally on board with it," Audra began, speaking with that tone of practicality Natalie was used to hearing from her. "I have been doing the auctions long enough to know which Candidates are going to bring in the most money. I know of one man in particular who comes in once a month just for the chance to bid on Quinn."

Natalie made a quick mental note to share that particular nugget of information with Quinn at a later time. "And from a personal perspective?"

Audra tilted her head and gave Natalie a knowing look. "Ask me again later."

"Okay." Natalie made another mental note. "So back to my original question. What happened? I hardly hear from you for weeks and then you are waiting for me in my room - in my bed no less - and you are unabashedly trying to get into my pants." Natalie's eyes followed Audra's as they scanned down her torso to her underwear-clad hips. "So to speak," she clarified with a chuckle.

"It is not technically my news to tell, but..." Audra shook her head. Clearly she was wrestling with some kind of decision that Natalie was not yet privy to. "What the hell?" She shrugged and turned to Natalie again. "Celine and the kids are moving into the Montecito house with James. As a family."

James sat at his computer in his ex-wife's home office, wondering what the hell he was supposed to say. He took a sobering sip of coffee and stared at the computer keyboard as if it contained the answers he was looking for.

'
I will be taking a brief leave of absence as my family prepares to move across the country.'

James furiously tapped the backspace button to erase the sentence, and stared at the blank email. He began typing again.

'I am taking an extended leave of absence. Jackson Fitzgerald, former CEO of FP Global, will come in as interim CCO in my absence.'

He wasn't terribly fond of that one, either. In the decade since forming the Fitson Entertainment Group James had only taken a handful of vacations. Taking a leave of absence was a foreign concept to him. His work was his life, or at least one of the only steady components in it. Work and Frankie. And now Colin. Colin changed everything.

He abandoned the partially composed email and left the office, heading straight to the baby's nursery. Inside he found Celine rocking in an overstuffed chair, Colin suckling peacefully at her breast. He observed her for a moment, taking in the sight of her uncombed blonde hair tied loosely at the crown of her head, her pretty face absent of makeup. He much preferred her more natural look to the polished one she put on like a uniform every day. Her perfectly coiffed hair and her immaculate wardrobe did nothing except remind him of her occasionally cold demeanor. When she was relaxed and unconcerned with the social mores of style, influence, and power, she was truly beautiful. Celine opened her eyes as though waking from sleep and offered James a serene smile, her blue eyes tired, but sparkling.

"I forgot how much I love this part," she said dreamily. James crossed the room and sat on the matching overstuffed ottoman in front of her, setting her feet in his lap to rub gently. "Oh that feels good," she sighed.

"You both look so content," he said softly.

"We are," she sighed again. "I almost wish Frankie was a baby again so I could hold her in my arms like this. She was such a beautiful baby. As is this one," she cooed to Colin, whose only response was a quickened suckling before quieting into his natural feeding rhythm again.

"Did Audra take Frankie to piano?" James asked as he focused his thumbs on the balls of her feet. When she did not respond immediately he looked up to find her giving him an odd look. "What?"

"Audra took off in the middle of the night, apparently to the airport. You didn't know?"

James' hands slowed as he processed Celine's words. "No, I did not know." He could feel the skin between his eyes pinching as he frowned. "She just left?"

"After that fight the two of you had? Honestly are you that surprised?"

If he was being honest with himself, he was not surprised at all. Fighting was something he and Audra never did. Bicker like an old married couple on occasion? Sure. They had been friends and partners since college and oftentimes functioned like a married couple - minus the sex and romance. It was only recently that James realized Audra was the closest he had to a best friend, another living soul whose companionship was worth more than almost anything else in the world to him. They had been on solid ground for years, it seemed, before one woman changed all of that.

James pushed Natalie out of his mind almost the minute she entered his thoughts. His stomach began to twist in knots, and his head was pounding with alcohol-induced dehydration.

"Did she say anything before she left?"

"Caroline mentioned a few things. She was the one who told me Audra left. She said my sister had one bag and that she would send for the rest of her belongings." Caroline, Celine and Audra's aunt, was more often than not like an older sister or occasional mother figure to the two Robertson sisters.

“What did she say?”

Celine rolled her eyes and readjusted baby Colin in her arms. He fussed for a moment but latched back on until he was content once more. "Something about not throwing away an opportunity. She had a number of choice words for you, and I am sure for me as well."

"Hmm," James nodded. He had no doubt Audra had a few 'choice words' to say about him. He once believed that Audra was not the type of woman to hold back her feelings, but it turned out there had been much she had kept from him; not for her own benefit, but for his.

"I cannot say I have ever understood my sister's antagonism towards me." Celine made a
tsk
noise between her teeth and shook her head. "You think she would be happy about us keeping our family together in California."

"Right," James nodded. "Especially for the sake of Frankie and Colin."

Celine made an odd noise and shook her head. "I meant because it means she can finally be with Natalie."

James' head whipped up so fast it startled Colin from his feeding. "What?"

"Isn't it obvious? Audra's in love with her."

Natalie sat perfectly still so as not to show any reaction. "Are they back together?"

"Not in any official capacity. But the way he talks about her now... You would have no idea that a year ago he could barely stand to be in the same room with her."

"He could long enough to make a baby with her," Natalie retorted, eyes rolling to the ceiling. When she initially found out Celine was pregnant and that James was possibly the father, she was stunned. It had happened some time between the night he and Natalie first met and the weekend they spent together in Vegas five months later. How he could sleep with the woman he was actively trying to divorce was beyond Natalie's comprehension.

"True. Since the day James Fitzgerald met my sister I have been telling him not to get involved with her. But he does not listen to me. It brought up a lot of things I thought we were trying to get over. Honestly we have not had a fight that bad since-" She cut herself off and glanced quickly at Natalie, knowing she could fill in the blank.

"Since you fought about me?"

"Yes. In a way I understand why he is taking leave. He is a new father again - in many ways for the first time - and he is feeling over-protective of his home life."

"So, what? He has forgiven Celine for cheating on him? For lying about Frankie's paternity for years? All of that gets swept under the rug because she gave birth?"
And because I slept with Joe and made out with Audra?

Audra shrugged emphatically. "I have no idea. But it did make me realize something."

"What's that?"

"When it comes to relationships - his or mine - James will not listen to me. I don’t know if he thinks he is proving something to me, or you, or himself even, but I am not going to wait around for the inevitable fallout. Nor am I going to deny myself any opportunity for happiness. Which is why I am here."

Natalie gave herself a moment to take several deep breaths, using the time to carefully consider her next words. "I thought you said your feelings for me were not strong enough to risk your relationship with him?"

"That was when I was putting James' feelings before my own." Audra turned and reached out to place a hand on top of Natalie's in her lap. "I am much more selfish now. I want to know what it is I am feeling for you, Natalie. Unless of course you and Joe are-"

"No," Natalie shook her head, knowing exactly what Audra meant. "I am not with Joe, or anyone else for that matter. Ironically I think our brief affair has made us better friends, and stronger business partners."

Another long moment stretched between them before Audra spoke up again. "I am very sorry that I said I wasn’t sure you were worth my relationship with James, Natalie. At the time I thought I was being loyal to him.”

Natalie shook her head. "Don't be. You two were partners long before I came into the picture."

Audra tightened her grip on Natalie's hands, her chestnut brown eyes looking imploringly into Natalie’s own silvery-blue. "Be that as it may, I am sorry."

"I will accept your apology under one condition."

Audra raised an eyebrow. "Oh?"

Natalie turned on to her side so she was facing Audra. "Tell me why you flew here from New York in the middle of the night rather than just calling or texting me."

"Isn't it obvious?"

"Yes," Natalie answered through a barely-suppressed smile. "But I want to hear you say the words."

Audra's eyes were cloudless, free of any semblance of insecurity or doubt. "Because the last time we were together you said you think you might love me, too. And if you do, I want to know what that feels like."

Natalie's eyes closed the moment Audra's lips were on hers. She breathed out through her nose as though expelling the anticipation that had been building up inside of her. It was a gentle kiss, slow and soft and full of promise. Audra's fingers swept across Natalie's cheeks and down to her neck. Natalie pulled away from Audra's lips and looked up at her questioningly.

"Would you mind waiting?"

Audra's brows creased. "No, of course not," she said, a tone of worry in her voice. "We can take it as slow as you want. It's your first time with a woman-"

"No-" Natalie interrupted. She chuckled through her breath at the sight of Audra's eyes increasing in surprise. "
Yes
, it would be my first time with a woman," she said, unable to stop herself from smiling. "I meant, can we wait until we don't have an audience? My roommates have excellent hearing."
And a penchant for listening.

The smile that lifted the corners of Audra's lips into her flushed cheeks was enough to set Natalie's heart on another fluttering tirade.

"Do you think you cannot be quiet?"

Natalie leaned up and bit her teeth around Audra's bottom lip, pulling it taut. "I can. I don't want to."